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𝙲͢𝚑͢𝚊͢𝚙͢𝚝͢𝚎͢𝚛͢ 𝟼͢
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The school year began and there was no sign of Jungkook.

For a moment my mind went into panic overdrive as it tried to convince me that this was because he was going to reject me. But I refused to allow the thought to remain. From the small amount of time we had spent together, Jungkook had made it clear that he wasn't going to do that.

But the thing with lycans is that our emotions are extremely hard to regulate. Anger can quickly turn to enraged. Happiness is a blissful state of ecstasy. And when we love? We love. It's unconditional. Irreversible. Without flaws or second guessing. Heavier and more intense than you could imagine. Lycans don't just love. We become enamored.

And regardless of why Jungkook was missing, I wasn't sad, as a normal emotion would be. As a cursed, I was depressed. I didn't miss him, I longed for my chosen.

Thankfully, I have my mama. She's my person and can always cheer me up. That's also because of her own curse. She's an empath. Not the normal kind that can sense emotions. But the cursed kind that can feel every strong emotion that a person she loves is feeling. Everything I go through, she goes through as well. I guess you could say that we're connected more than a mother and daughter normally would be.

I know I'm 18 and considered a legal adult in many parts of the world. But I've always been really attached to her. From as early as I can remember, separating from her was always difficult. Getting used to her going to work was tough. Papa's ok. Really, he's a exceptional father. But he's not mama.

Although papa is the one that works from home and takes care of me and my six other siblings, mama is the one who knows where every single item in the house is. She can name all of our birthdates, future doctors appointments, each of our Christmas lists, favorite meals, biggest pet peeves, and upcoming school projects. Somehow she fits all that information into her head and gets it to stick. She's as sharp as a tack and never forgets anything.

But that's not to harp on dad. He's the fun parent. The one we run to for protection when mom is being strict. He's the one that surprises us with our favorite desserts and generous gifts from no where. The parent who teaches us how to cook but doesn't get mad when we make clumsy mistakes. He's our protector and shields us from outward harm to the best of his ability.

Rather than mope around and pine for Jungkook all the time, I decided to put all of my attention into tennis practice. Mr Kim, our coach, has been highly impressed (and slightly afraid of) my sudden intensity in the sport. Every time I get on the court I imagine Jungkook rejecting me and I slam the racket into the ball—of which I imagine to be Jungkook's head—with every bit of strength I've got. My reaction time went from 0.68 seconds to 0.55 in two weeks.

This lead to some weight loss. But that didn't last long with the friends I have.

My two best friends are also not natives to this country, because I like to collect foreigners like Pokémon.

Antonia and her family are from Mexico. Although we're the same age, Antonia is the most motherly person I've ever met. She's very protective over us and has a terrifyingly hot temper that you never want to be on the receiving end of. Most days I wonder if she's bipolar because she can go from 0 to 100 in a matter of seconds, and then to -5 in the next few. She's made me cry a couple of times, but then after the fact she's crying because she made me cry.

It's Antonia's mother's fault that I can never lose weight and keep it off. I have no idea what that woman does to her food but it's like I'm in heaven every time I eat at her house. And each time I leave ten pounds heavier. Didn't know I liked rice or beans or tomatoes (because who in their right mind likes tomatoes??) before I ate that woman's food. I'm a wolf, my main diet is meat. But that woman can change my entire perspective on food.

On the other hand we have Tsubaki, who's Japanese and that one crack headed friend everyone needs in their life. Every year for my birthday she gives me something to remind me of her. Once she gave me a pillow with her face on it. Another time a notebook full of her signature. Then a t-shirt that said 'property of Ito Tsubaki' on the front AND back. This year I got a full sized framed poster of her dumbass.

Along with mama, they were there to take my mind off of things. Although with them being human, there was only so much emotion I could show that was able to be explained away. In their perspective, I had been pining away for Jungkook for years. They hated him and didn't understand why I couldn't let it go.

Antonia basically forced her mom's sopaipillas down my throat and Tsubaki gave me a custom made blanket with her face all over it to match my pillow.

I low key hate her.

Today is a normal awful morning at school (I say awful because all mornings are awful. Because it's the morning) and we're walking in together. Antonia is fretting and being a mother hen over the small cut on my chin I'd gotten last night when I tripped over my baby brother's train set.

Because she's a Taurus and always feels like she needs to one-up everyone else, (and I'm allowed to pick at her for that because I'm also a Taurus) Tsubaki says, "you think that's bad? Look at this." Then proceeds to show off where she cut herself shaving. Right on her bikini line.

Both of us go blind for a second over the unnecessary flashing. When my vision returns I see Antonia's jaw clenching. Thankfully, she doesn't do anything but say absolutely terrible things about us in Spanish (I don't know why I'm being called a pendejo too) and goes on ahead without us. I guess I should mention that she also hates mornings. She won't be fully awake until around lunchtime and suddenly be the sweetest person ever. Or not. I never know with her.

Tsubaki and I part ways soon after and it's just me and my lonesome. For the hundred quadrillionth time my mind wanders back into Jungkook land. I like it there.

"Hey." Felix walks by and greets me. I'm about to reply when he turns around to walk backwards, a mischievous smile on his face. "Your triceratops lover is here."

"My what..?" My brain farts and it's not until he's turned back around and left me behind that I get it.

Just as I look over my shoulder, Jungkook appears. Mouth hanging slightly open, all I can hear is my pulse thundering in my ears. Somehow my legs forget how to function and my thighs tremble. And it's not just the sight of him that makes me lose all functionality and my thoughts to turn the same consistency as pudding. It's the look he's giving me.

That look doesn't say 'I'm going to reject you'. That look says 'I'm Christina Perri and I have loved you for a thousand years'. I need to rewatch the Twilight series again. Team Jacob. Forever.

I don't know how it feels to be a werewolf and come face to face with your soulmate and touch them. But I do know how it feels to be a lycan and to do the same with your chosen.

The world around us bleeds dry and disappears until it's only us. Looking into his eyes is a trip because it's like I can see us. Not the us today, but the us of thousands of years of reincarnations where we've somehow, against all odds, found one another. I'm not very religious. I believe that there are gods. Really, I know that there are gods. But I'm not sure if I believe in it. If that makes sense. I'm not sure if there is such a thing as multiple lives and reincarnation.

Yet here we are.

He looks so handsome, it hurts. Since we'd last seen one another his hair had been cut, just barely, but I could tell. It falls in raven colored waves that brush against the tips of his ears. A lock hangs low on his forehead, just above his right eye. He's wearing more than one earring today. Three studs in one, two in the other and small silver hoops on each side. A flash near his temple catches my eye and I note with interest that he's had his eyebrow pierced.

It's such a small and silly thing to make me feel depressed. He had time to do that. But he didn't have time to call me. Or love me.

"Hey babe." His voice sends a tremor down the entire length of my soul.

BABE?

I blink stupidly. Babe.

I like it. Picasso.

The skin of my arm breaks into goosebumps and I almost forget to breathe when he caresses the skin there with one of his knuckles. The feeling that gives me is insanity. Every blade of grass, each wave in the ocean, every single turn the earth makes, all the life and death and sickness and happiness on earth is wholly insignificant forever. Time doesn't stand still but it moves fast and I can picture all of our lives together. All because of that one touch.

I don't say anything back to him. He doesn't say anything more. Instead he leans close. So close that I'm nearing spontaneous combustion. With his nose brushing my neck, I shiver as he inhales at leisure.

"I missed you." He breathes against my neck, clearly trying to kill me. At least I'll die happy.

"You did?" I reply weakly. I'm surprised over many things but the main one being that I'm actually able to talk. "I...missed you too."

"Good." He says one word and so simply but I can feel the satisfaction in waves of energy flowing from him. My heart skips a beat when he smiles, and for once it's for me. "Your last class ends at four?"

I nod dumbly. "But I...I have..." what's that sport where you hit a ball over a net with rackets called? I have no think. "I have sport." That's not what it's called.

His smile grows bigger and my brain gets stupider. "Me too. Let's meet up after."

My mom is picking me up after school because I'm too scared to be out after dark. Sure it'll be a terrifying experience that may or may not traumatize me and give me PTSD. But this is Jungkook. Jeon freaking Jungkook. I'd be stupid to turn him down. Especially a second time in a row.

Instead I nod and agree with a quiet affirmative sound. Should I be scared or excited? What if we get attacked and dragged away by a haint?? What if The Rake catches us and tortures us for hours?? No. Wait.

What do I wear?!? I don't have anything pretty or even feminine to put on! OH GOD NO—I can't see him after practice! I'll be sweaty and gross and I refuse to step foot in the locker room showers because all these bitches will get too jealous when they see me naked!

That's a lie. I'm not shy about being naked and I do accidentally flash them from time to time when I'm changing, just to show them what a perfect body looks like. I'm freaking beautiful.

But anyway, getting back to the subject. I've decided to be scared and panicky.

What sport do I play, again??

"I'll meet you back here, then." Jungkook is oblivious to my inner turmoil. "And I'll see you at lunch."

"Ok." I nod. Maybe by the end of the day I'll be able to say more than three words to him.

After we separate I'm able to breathe once again. The fog in my brain lifts away.

Tennis. It's called tennis.

-⃥̸

After some debate with myself, I decide to spill everything (and I use this term loosely) to my friends. There isn't a class that all three of us share, but we do share lunch. Antonia is immediately on guard and worried.

"Why would you want to do anything with him?" Her eyes trace my face and to the cut on my chin. "Did you hit your head harder than you thought?"

I'm exasperated but understanding where she's coming from. In her view, Jungkook was the jerk that hurt broke my heart. And the thing with Antonia is, once you're her friend, that's end game. Even if I'm in the wrong she always has my back and will forever stick by my side. I like to joke and say that she's like my personal pit-bull. But that's really not far from the truth.

In fact, Jungkook is scared of her. I wish I knew what she said to him but she refuses to tell me. All I know is that he used to get this shit eating grin whenever he saw me, something that always brought my mood down. Then one day in 10th grade she grabbed him by his school tie and drug him off and the next, he barely acknowledged me ever again.

"Is he forcing you into this??" She asks and rolls her shoulders back like she's readying herself for a fight. "I swear by the Virgin Mary, the Holy Ghost, Jesus and the donkey I will—" then she starts cursing in Spanish, some of which I'm able to make out. Something about crushing balls with a rolling pin.

"No!" I'm torn between laughing and feeling actual fear. I can never tell if she's serious or not. "You know I like him."

"Lucretia." She says flatly. "You don't like him. You have a crush on him. That's different."

As much as I don't like her words, she's right. I don't even know Jungkook like that. All I'm really aware of is that he's my chosen and I'm his soulmate. We're meant to be. Maybe since he's come of age and recognizes me he'll be different. Soulmates or whatever automatically like each other, no?

Something in my face must make her backtrack because she sighs and switches to a more neutral tone.

"Look, I'm not going to tell you what to do. It's your life and your decision. But if he hurts you in ANY way, I swear to-"

"The Virgin Mary, the Holy Ghost, Jesus and the donkey?" I supply.

"Yes, all that plus that whole damn stable that I will hurt him. I might not kill him and I probably won't even physically hurt him. But I will find someway to bring minor inconveniences to every aspect of his life."

"K, thanks." I nod and glance to Tsubaki, who is happily demolishing her lunch in silence. "What do you think of this?"

Tsubaki is completely different from Antonia. Where Antonia is more practical, she's off in dreamland where anyone can do anything they set their mind to.

"I think it's great!!" Her voice is light and airy and she gives off air headed vibes but really is far from it. I think she just likes when people underestimate her and can't figure her out. "I always knew you guys would end up together."

"You did??" I ask, surprised.

"No." She smiles and gives no explanation at all.

She's so freaking weird. "K. Thanks."

"I also have a date tonight!" She expresses and Antonia slams her chopsticks down on the table.

"I'm NOT DOING THIS SHIT TONIGHT." She declares with a fiery expression. I avoid eye contact at all cost while Tsubaki continues to inhale her food without a care in the world. "Lucretia, I love you, but that guy breaks your heart every five minutes and I can't force myself to trust the process." She throws that out in a weirdly gentle but aggressive way before turning on our other friend.

"And I don't even want to see the thing you're going out with because it's the same story every. Damn. Time. You'll say, 'look he's so handsome!'" She ignores the snort I let out at her Tsubaki impression. It's completely accurate. "Then you show us this tinder profile of this dude who's uglier than big foot's big fucking toe! And when we say that you're all, 'but he's a nice guy!' But then guess what?? SHOCKER: he's not a nice guy and only hit you up because he's a fucking fetishsizing pervert who wants to date an anime character and he still looks like big foot's big fucking toe!!"

At the end of her rant I don't know whether to laugh or cry because everything she said was 100% accurate.

Instead my insides decide to roll up like a fruit by the foot because Jungkook arrives, lunch tray in hand. Felix is next to him, grinning like an idiot as he looks back and forth between us as though he expects us to start making out on the table or something.

"I didn't invite him." Jungkook supplies while throwing an annoyed look at his friend.

"Which is a mistake on your part because they all want me here." Felix skips around the table to sit next to me. Jungkook looks feral at our proximity.

"Move." He orders.

Tsubaki giggles as he all but elbows Felix in the head to get him out of the way. His friend squawks shrilly as he flies sideways.

By the time he's rearranged himself and is looking outraged, Jungkook has slid into the previously occupied seat next to me.

"Yah! Lucretia would much rather sit next to me than mister Jeon Triceratops!" Felix prods and Jungkook takes the bait.

"She was joking when she said that. Right?" He directs towards me. "Besides, if I'm any dinosaur, it's a brachiosaurus."

Tsubaki pauses long enough between bites to point out, "you do look like a triceratops though."

"By the way, Tsubaki, this is Jungkook, Jungkook this is my friend Tsubaki." I say weakly, still not over my chosen's entire existence. Why is he looking so hot on a Monday afternoon??? Both nod towards one another. "And you already know Antonia..." from the one time she most likely threatened your life.

"Yes." Jungkook confirms that they've met, all while avoiding Antonia's steely gaze. I almost feel like I'm introducing him to my mom. She's that friend that looks out for your best interests, and automatically hates anyone that hurts you. I really don't deserve her. "And it's nice to meet you, Tsubaki."

Antonia holds up one chopstick. "If you hurt Lucretia or ever make her cry, I'm taking this chopstick and shoving it up your dick hole."

The table goes dead silent. Wooyoung chooses this moment to walk by and send me a wink. Nervously I wave back.

After a few awkward seconds, Felix coughs. "What kind of dinosaur do I look like?"

"A pterodactyl." I blurt, hoping this could be an opening to escape the tension. "I mean, your neck is so long-"

Felix squawks in outrage once more.

"The same goes for you." Jungkook says calmly. My nerves skyrocket as he and Antonia glare at one another across the table. "If you hurt my Lucretia or make her cry, I'll set you on fire."

My Lucretia.

Zeus almighty. I'm a nervous wreck, Tsubaki is once again plowing into her lunch as though she hasn't eaten in days, Felix says something to the affect of how if he's a pterodactyl, then he's the most handsome pterodactyl to ever be, and Jungkook and Antonia both look like they're about to start WW3. Or four. I forget where we're at at this point.

"Good." My Mexican friend says in an approving tone, shocking everyone present. "You fucking better." There's silence for a moment. "And you definitely resemble a Styracosaurus more than anything."