Chapter 23: Seven Whole Days - Part 2 (JPOV)

Thursday: Day Four

"Are you out of your mind!?" I scream. "You can't tell her she can't come here. It is literally the ENTIRE point of having a Family Day. It's not just for the people in here, but for the people OUT THERE too!" I shout as I point out the window.

Namjoon and Yugyeom had just sat me down to let me know that they'd informed Y/N that I wasn't permitted to have any visitors. This is on top of the rule that I can't even speak to her on the phone.

"Jimin, I know that this is difficult to process but as we've told you when we discussed the phone calls. We need to avoid any aggressive triggers until we get to the root of the issue and why you've returned to alcohol for a second time," Namjoon says.

"Y/N is not the problem."

"Problem is not the appropriate word. But she is the catalyst."

"This is bullshit. You can't keep me from her."

"Actually Park, we can," Yugyeom interjects. "And we are. You entered voluntarily yes, but you know how it works even with voluntary admission."

"It's one week, Jimin." Namjoon tells me and I resist the urge to punch him square in the face, completely fed up with his I'm on your side rouse.

"What are you even telling her, Namjoon?" Patients aren't technically supposed to refer to the doctors by their first names, but I'm sick of them acting like they don't know who the fuck I am in the medical community.

"I... told her what she needed to know."

"Which was?" Don't beat around the fucking bush.

"That the focus is to make sure that you don't return to alcohol. That once you leave you don't return to old habits. We need you focused and we don't need any distractions."

"She's not a distraction."

"You've certainly been very focused on her and when you could talk to her since you've arrived," Yugyeom says.

"Because she's my fiancée and I worry about her."

"Kip, I have it from here," Namjoon says effectively dismissing Yugyeom. He nods before finding the exit.

As soon as the door closes behind him, he unleashes his thoughts on me in a very unprofessional manner. "You are obsessed with this woman, Jimin. She is absolutely the reason why you've started drinking again! How the hell can't you see that!?" I can literally feel the daggers coming out of my eyes in response to Namjoon's outburst but he continues despite my deadly look. "You broke up a fucking marriage. AS. A. MARRIAGE COUNSELOR. You mentioned in your first evaluation that you started drinking earlier this year, around the time you started seeing Y/N." He starts and I feel my palms begin to sweat hearing him say her name

"Do you really not see the correlation? You couldn't have her so you drank, then you had her but not on your terms. We both know lack of control is one of your triggers so again, you drank. Are you REALLY telling me that you haven't put it all together yet? You haven't connected point A to point B? You wanted to be with her, you couldn't be with her- SO. YOU. DRANK. The question I want to know is HOW DO WE AVOID THIS IN THE FUTURE!?" he yells. "I'm not doing this with you every time you throw a temper tantrum for not getting your way, Jimin!"

I stare at him hard, my cold eyes angry and unforgiving. "How fucking dare you."

"Jimin-" he sighs. "You and I both know, I'm not just your counselor here. I won't sugarcoat it for you." I don't bother to listen to anything he has to say before I'm out the door slamming it behind me.

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I'm hitting the pavement hard one foot after the other as I run my eighth lap around the track indicating that I've hit two miles. If only I could hop over the fence in the distance and run home. I slow my feet to a stop and check the stopwatch on my wrist missing the Rolex that usually sits there instead. Leave all valuables at home is one of the rules that they stress the most before entering any rehabilitation facility. I shake my head as I think about the most precious of my valuables sitting at home probably thinking that I'm just avoiding her calls.

How could Namjoon say all of that? He doesn't even know her! But he does know you. My subconscious bites back.

"Are you ready to sit down and talk? Or are you just going to avoid me and spend the morning running laps around his track? It's cold as hell out here." I look over to see Namjoon leaning against the rail separating the track from

the stands. It's the middle of December in Seoul but despite the freezing temperatures, I feel a fiery rage building underneath my skin.

"Fuck you, Namjoon." I growl, the last four days having been nothing short of what felt like a hostile takeover of my life, something I'd only witnessed in extreme situations. I've been drinking heavily again for the past two weeks and they're treating me as if I've had a bottle a day for the last forty years. Despite the issues that I've had with alcohol before this was extreme. I look down at my watch. Twelve minutes, not bad. How fast I can run a mile feels like the only thing that's gotten better since I've been here.

"I'm sorry for losing it like that," he says and he shakes his head. "I just want what's best for you. I am disappointed that you're in this situation... not just the alcohol. But getting suspended, getting involved with a patient... I thought you knew better."

"Save me the lecture, Namjoon. I'm not in the mood." Especially after you unleashed all that bullshit on me this morning.

"I shouldn't have said what I said. But... you know deep down... you're drinking again because of some deep-rooted issue that stems from her."

I scoff. "No. I was drinking because I lost my job."

He interrupts. "Because you were sleeping with her."

"It doesn't make it her fault."

"I know that and I know you believe that. But somewhere inside of you... you may be fearing the resentment that may come later. The resentment towards her for losing your job even though it's not her fault- entirely. You did take a lot of risks in being with her- continuing your relationship. Maybe that's what's led you back to alcohol. Whatever it is, we need to exorcize it."

My hands are on my hips as I pace back and forth as I try to calm my racing heart. "And you think keeping me away from Y/N is helping? Not letting me talk to her? Not letting her come and visit me here?" I rub my head thinking about the screaming match from this morning. "You've never been like this. You've always had my back-"

"You think I don't have it now?"

"Why can't I talk to her? What if she needs me or something's wrong?"

"Jimin, she's fine. I relayed everything she said last night on the phone. She's okay. She misses you and she loves you. We've talked about why we advised severing communication."

"Because of this bullshit you're trying to pass off as your evaluation? Thinking that she's a trigger?"

"Jimin-," he starts.

I raise my hand, effectively cutting him off. I can't listen to this shit anymore. "No. Okay? I'm done. I'm fed up with this. It's like you're all in cahoots to punish me a step further than the suspension. I don't want to hear anything else from you or anyone here. Just leave me be for the next three days."

I begin running again, as I hear him calling after me. I let my mind drift back to the session on the second day where they informed me that they hadn't been letting Y/N's calls through and that there would be no communication between us for the next five days. My blood begins to boil as I pick up the pace.

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Two days prior:

"How did you sleep Jimin?" Namjoon says as he sits across from me sliding his frames over his eyes.

"To be expected." I sigh as I run a hand over my face. It's been a little under twenty-four hours since I've seen or spoke to Y/N and I already miss her. "Before we start today, can I have my phone back? I want to call Y/N."

"Jimin, you know that's not how this works, phone calls are between four and six."

"Yeah, I know. On the main lines, give me my cell, Namjoon," I say, holding my hand out.

"Jimin, I don't have it."

"What do you mean you don't have it?"

"I mean it's in Yugyeom's office just like everyone else's phones, away from patients so they don't get themselves into trouble."

"What?" I narrow my gaze into slits. "I'm a doctor, I certainly don't expect the same treatment as everyone else here given that once upon a time I was the on-call doctor here." I shake my head. "Go get it!"

"Jimin, you're not a doctor right now, you're a patient. And you're in rehab. It's the time to separate from your life and recover. You need... space to get better."

"Are you fucking with me right now? This is a joke, right?"

"Jimin, do you want to get better?"

"I want to talk to my fiancée." He blinks his eyes a few times before I see him jot something down on his notepad. "For Christ sakes, Namjoon, she's pregnant... and I'm not there."

"I'm aware of that. Tell me was this pregnancy planned?"

"Namjoon, I swear to God, I will have your wife string you up by your balls the second I'm out of here if you don't get me my phone." Namjoon's wife would definitely not be on board with this shit. She would love Y/N.

"Jimin, I'll see what I can do. But for now can we just talk? I haven't talked to you in weeks."

My knee begins to bounce nervously that he's so adamant about me not talking to Y/N. And now he's changing the subject. I know these signs. "I've been busy."

"Yeah busy soaking your liver in scotch, Jimin I thought we had a handle on that."

"We do... I do!" I say crossing my arms across my chest. "It's been a rough few weeks."

"I know."

"I can't practice for two years." I say the burn in my throat returning both from the words and as a reminder that I haven't had any alcohol today.

"Do you think that was fair?"

"Ummm," I rub my forehead. "I don't know, I think two years is a bit harsh."

"Is it? It's pretty standard. And... correct me if I'm wrong... but I do remember a certain conversation on a golf course when I told you that these were potential outcomes. Did you think I was making it up?"

"I knew it was a potential outcome."

"So you just thought- what? The board would just eat up your love story like a bunch of women reading romance novels? Come on."

"There's no need for your fucking sarcasm."

"There's no need for your fucking language," he retorts.

"Screw you, Namjoon. I am in here so that I can break myself of this habit before it truly begins to form, but I don't need you questioning everything I've done over the past several months. I've already answered to someone, taken my punishment, I've been asked a thousand and one of these questions... I'm not doing it again." I am so over talking about my choice to have a relationship with a patient.

"Jimin I didn't know... I didn't know that you had started drinking again at all. Your entry forms and in yesterday's session you stated that you'd been drinking socially for months. You knew that was a slippery slope."

"I wasn't out of control."

"That's not the point. After we got you through it the first time, I thought you were done."

"I wasn't drinking nearly as aggressively as I was then."

Seven years ago, when I first graduated medical school, my drinking was out of control. I will be the first to admit it. I was lonely, in crippling debt from med school not wanting to use a dime of my trust fund for it and was making next to nothing as an intern. I was barely speaking to my parents, the resentment for them and my brother after a childhood of hell still coursing through my veins. The only thing in my life I felt I had any control over was alcohol.

All of that changed when I met Namjoon. I refused to go to rehab like he'd advised not wanting my first act as a doctor to be labeled as a patient. So I laid low. I went to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings in seedy basements across town and used Namjoon as a "sponsor" of sorts. Within a month, I was clean. After that, things in my life slowly began to come together and for years I didn't touch alcohol.

"You said you started earlier this year..."

"Yep."

"Right around the time you started seeing Y/N and her husband."

"Ex Husband." I growl.

"Fine, Jimin. Ex-husband. You had to know that was going to get out of hand. You were starting to have feelings for a woman while you were counseling her and a man she was married to. That could cause anyone to have a breakdown of sorts. I'm not blaming you. I just don't know why you didn't come to me. We could have worked through it."

"It was just here and there."

"Once you've established a history of problems with alcohol you know there is no 'just here and there'."

I'm quiet, letting the words I already know wash over me. "You want to know why I didn't come see you? Because you'd know! And I couldn't face you." I rub my hand over my head as I feel the headache forming more aggressively by the minute. "I didn't know things were going to escalate between us..."I say, recalling the first time I reached for alcohol all those months ago. "I thought it was hard not being able to have Y/N at all." I shake my head. "But I was wrong. It was worse, having her but not whenever I wanted."

"It sounds like Y/N- and while I don't blame her, it sounds like she was your catalyst for beginning to drink again."

My eyes shoot to his, knowing where he's going with this conclusion and I shake my head. "I want to speak to her- today."

"And it's my strong recommendation that you don't."

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Namjoon had went on to tell me that she'd already called once that morning and that they would be letting her know that I wouldn't be allowed to accept any of her calls. I close my eyes hoping that she can hear my thoughts apologizing to her for this situation. I slow my feet as I finish another lap to find Namjoon still in the same spot.

"I would never tell a patient that they couldn't have their support system."

"Even if that support system is what caused them to drink in the first place?"

"Oh my God!" I yell out. "What the hell is your problem when it comes to Y/N anyway? What do you have against her?"

"Why don't we go inside and-"

"No."

"Jimin, it's freezing and-"

"I'm not going anywhere with you until you tell me why you're hellbent on keeping me from Y/N."

He sighs and pulls his coat tighter around him as he comes through the gate to stand with me on the track. "Jimin, I'm not the enemy here. But talking to Y/N right now is not particularly good for you."

My eyes widen, having heard the person that used to know me better than anyone speak such a ludicrous statement. "You're crazy."

"Let's walk." He nods to the track and I reluctantly begin to walk in time with him somewhat curious as to how he came to this bullshit observation. "Tell me about the first time you had a drink. What happened?"

I narrow my eyes as I shake my head. "I don't really remember."

"Yes you do."

True. I did know.

"I went out with Hoseok... met some girl at a bar. God she looked just like Y/N.'' I rub my forehead trying to remember her exact features but it's no use as the only woman ingrained in my memory currently has my child growing inside of her. "I can't even remember what she looked like exactly but I remember almost doing a double take when I saw her. I couldn't even stop the erection stirring in my pants thinking it was really Y/N. She must have felt me staring at her because she looked at me. I realized it wasn't Y/N and looked away but it didn't stop her from coming over."

"I'd been drinking iced tea all night but for some reason, I ordered a scotch next. Maybe because she was drinking and I offered to buy her one, I don't know. But the more I drank, the more she began to look like Y/N. At the end of the night, we were both drunk and... I took her home. I didn't realize how fucked I was until Y/N's name left my lips when I came. I'd been masturbating like a crazy person thinking about her, but this was different. I was crushed. I wanted her so much and I couldn't have her."

"Had you slept with her at this point?"

"No." I shake my head. "But after that night, I knew that I had taken about a hundred steps back getting intoxicated and fucking a woman that reminded me of a patient. So I just swept that night under the rug. Pretended it didn't happen. I tried to get my mind off of Y/N."

"Did it work?"

"It worked... until I saw her again," I admit. "I went out again with my brother and met another woman. Same thing.... I used her to fill the void of not having Y/N. I went on to sleep with her for the next month before I cut it off."

"I see. Did you have feelings for this woman?"

"No."

"Were you drinking during this time too?"

"Yes... more socially though. I wasn't getting drunk, and it wasn't everyday. Just to take the edge off and to... feel numb I guess." My body is starting to return to it's normal body temperature so the cold is beginning to set in. "In the early stages of Y/N and I starting to sleep together it was fine, I'd stopped altogether. I thought that I had everything under control. But then things began to get more real on both ends. I couldn't see her when I wanted, talk to her when I wanted. I had no control over the situation and I started to spiral."

"Did Y/N know about any of that?"

"No. I hid it from her. She doesn't even know that I've had a problem with alcohol before."

"Is there a reason you haven't told her?"

"Why do you think?" I ask him as we head back inside the facility. "I didn't want her to think less of me."

"Do you think she would?"

"I think she'd be worried and I don't want to do that to her. I mean I'd been drinking for a few weeks and she panicked, imagine what she would be thinking if she knew I had a history with it?"

"Well now do you understand why we're advising that you don't speak to her while you're here? There is a correlation between her, your feelings for her... this whole situation and you drinking again. You were drinking because you wanted something that you couldn't have... which is always your trigger. With your family.. And now with Y/N."

"No. I was..." The words fail me. "I just..."

We make our way through the halls and back into the office we'd been using and I immediately drop to the couch, not caring that the sweat is still fresh on my skin from my running. I stare off into space, letting Namjoon's words run through my mind on a loop. "I can't lose her, Namjoon."

I rub my jaw, feeling the tears form in my eyes. "It's not the same as with my parents. I don't question Y/N's love for me. I'm not competing with anyone for Y/N's attention or affection."

"But... you were competing for her. With her husband."

"There was never a competition between myself and Tuan once we started."

"Be that as it may, she wasn't yours. You didn't have her. She belonged to another man. You couldn't see her, touch her, hold her when you wanted.. And it made you crazy."

I rub my palms together trying to calm my nerves as I feel myself begin to get worked up. "Namjoon..."

"So you drank... to numb the pain of not being able to be with her. And again when you couldn't have her... whenever she couldn't see you. When she couldn't take your calls..."

"Stop," I tell him not wanting to hear anymore.

"And then... when you finally got her... you lose the ability to practice. Jimin, you've been fighting for stability and balance... your entire adult life. When you were a child, you couldn't figure out why your brother got the attention you craved which stayed with you for years and then you meet this woman and although you understand why she can't give you the attention and affection you yearn for, it doesn't stop you from craving it. For wanting Y/N..." he trails off.

I pull at my hair wishing that it were enough to wake me up from this nightmare when I feel as if everything is clear for the first time ever. I look up from the floor, my eyes brimming with unshed tears. "I'm not giving her up... for anything."

"Then be honest with her. Be fair to her. You'll need to be upfront with her about your past so that you can be stronger for your future. For her and for the family that you're building with her."

"A part of me is afraid that she'll leave me," I say finally, feeling all of my insecurities coming to a head.

"What makes you fear that?"

"I don't know... I know she loves me.. But she had everything and she walked away from it all. She risked everything just as I did. What if she wakes up one day and regrets it?"

"What if you?"

"I won't."

"Okay, if you are sure you will never feel that way, why won't you take her word for it that she feels the same? I am sure that she's been equally transparent about her feelings in this whole ordeal."

I'm silent for what feels like an eternity, my thoughts, his words weighing on my brain. "Can we wrap this up for the day?" I ask him wanting to be alone with my thoughts.

"Of course." He nods. "I've given you a lot to reflect on."

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I walk through the facility and I'm not surprised that the majority of the occupants aren't in their rooms as they're with their families in one of the many common areas. I make it back to my room and drop to my bed the events of the day having me barreling towards sleep despite the fact that it was only noon. I'm staring at the ceiling for what feels like an hour before I sit up, accepting defeat that sleep was avoiding me. I reach for my bag pulling out a book that I brought and when I open it a picture falls out.

And not just any picture.

My favorite picture of Y/N- one that I stare at often as it's the background to my cell phone. .

She's lying on our bed giving the camera one of her signature shy smiles, her eyes teasing me as they always do. How did this get here? I get my answer when a small piece of paper falls out behind it.

Thank you for loving me even when I didn't love myself. Thank you for being the support I needed, the shoulder to cry on, the hand to hold. My favorite hello, my hardest goodbye, all of the things that love songs are made of. Thank you for breathing life into me- metaphorically and literally. You've made me a mommy! For eight months you've been the single reason I look forward to the next day. In the beginning, because it was a day closer to seeing you again. And now, because it's another day I get to spend this adventure through life with you. I know right now you may be a little upset with me but please know that I'm always in your corner and I vow to never leave it. You're the man of my dreams (and thankfully my reality) and I'm so grateful that you've chosen me to love for the rest of your life. I'm so proud of you and I can't wait to see you in a week.

I miss you, I love you and I'm thinking about you every second that you're gone.

Your Y/N

I glance at the picture again, my eyes suddenly blurry after reading Y/N's words. Upset with her? Never. The guilt takes over my mind as I think about what the last few days has meant for Y/N. What has she been doing? I hope she's gotten out and not stayed in the house sulking. Hoseok and Hwasa better have checked in on her. I can't wait to take her in my arms and hold her, touch her soft skin, pepper kisses all over her stomach.

Baby.

We made a baby. I left so quickly we barely had a chance to celebrate. I smile thinking about the new life growing inside of her by the day. Something only I've given her. Something she's only wanted from me. I think about the engagement ring in my safe and chuckle to myself thinking about the fact that now that she knows it's there she's probably tried to break in to see it. God knows it wouldn't be difficult to crack given that the code is her birthday.

I read over her words at least a dozen more times wishing they would transport me to her. I trace my fingertip over her face before I press the picture of her to my heart. I've long forgotten about the book and clearly the insomnia because within moments I'm asleep.

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Saturday: Day Six

"So you know what it is that you need to do tomorrow?" Namjoon asks me as he sits across from me. I'm laying flat on my back on the patient's couch just as it's portrayed in the movies.

"Yes."

"Which is?"

"I have to tell Y/N everything."

"About?"

"My childhood, my issues with drinking before..." I trail off as if to say et cetera et cetera.

"And why is that?"

"So she knows my triggers and recognizes the signs."

"It won't work if you aren't honest with her. You need someone who can see when you may be relapsing. Someone that will push you when she sees the signs. It doesn't work if she doesn't know what she's looking for."

"I know."

He furrows his brows and presses a finger to his lips. "Tell me why you sold the house, Jimin."

I groan remembering I did that when I was half in the bag. "Fuck. What have I done?"

"Why did you do it?"

"I thought it was what Y/N wanted. She kept talking about wanting to travel around the world during my hiatus I just... I didn't think she wanted to be here."

He narrows his eyes. "Any other reasons?"

"I mean I'm not thrilled at living so close to her ex-husband."

"So you're thinking about a bigger move?"

"I don't hate the idea. I wouldn't mind starting over in two years in a new city where my suspension isn't common knowledge to everyone in the field."

"In two years, people would have forgotten here in Seoul too, and you've got pretty thick skin, Jimin."

"I'm just trying to think of what I could have been thinking to make me do it without even telling her." I pinch the bridge of my nose trying to remember my motives for putting the house Y/N loved and adored back on the market.

"Is she upset?"

"I'm not entirely sure, maybe.. probably."

"You haven't talked about it?"

"Not while I was sober."

He nods. "You need to discuss that, Jimin."

"I know."

"I will agree that one thing that Y/N said has stood out to me. She said that you know everything about her, but there are so many things she doesn't know about you."

"Yes..."

"Talk to her before you give her the ring, Jimin. Before this is all final, before you're married. Make sure she can handle all of your baggage the same way you've handled hers."

"You're right."

"I know she's pregnant so for nine months it won't matter, but it's also so that she becomes somewhat mindful of her drinking habits going forward as well."

"I know, Namjoon." I've seen it time and time again in marriage counseling. If one spouse has a problem with drugs or alcohol, oftentimes it can be the spouse without the problem that can accidentally drag them back in with something as harmless as a champagne toast.

"Do you think she can handle all of this?"

"I think... No, I know that Y/N can handle anything. She loves me and just wants to be there for me however she can."

"You certainly sound different than you did just a few days ago when you worried she may leave you."

"I've definitely gotten some clarity being in here."

"Clarity you may not have gotten if you were talking to Y/N everyday," he says from over the top of his glasses.

"Don't push it, Namjoon."

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I run a hand over my jaw, feeling the new growth that's grown over the past week as I haven't been able to shave. They don't exactly let you come in with razors or clippers. I scratch my jaw hoping that Y/N won't hate it too much before I shave it off.

It's only nine at night and I feel like a kid on the night before Christmas, as I'm anxious to get into bed knowing what the next day would bring- Y/N.

I press a kiss to the picture she gave me like I have the last few nights since I discovered it and slide into bed. I haven't masturbated at all since I've been here as I know it's something they advise you not to do in rehab but the thought of seeing Y/N tomorrow has the excitement coursing through my dick making it impossible to go down.

I turn on my side in a huff, ignoring the tingling sensation in my balls and the throbbing in my cock.

What I wouldn't give for Y/N's mouth wrapped around my- No Jimin. Besides, think about how much better the release will be tomorrow inside of her. I put a pillow over my face and groan thinking about how I still have one final session tomorrow before I get to leave the facility.

I look at the clock on my nightstand. Just sixteen more hours. A smile finds my face as I think about how I plan to never be without her this long ever again.

No. More. Alcohol.

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Sunday: Day Seven

I haven't talked to anyone outside of these four walls for the past week so I am unaware if anyone is coming with Y/N to pick me up tonight. Is Hoseok bringing her? I shudder thinking about my parents bullying her into wanting to come as well as I told Hoseok to let them know what was going on.

I think about the conversations that need to be had with both of my parents regarding their attitudes towards my future bride, especially now as she'll be giving them their first grandchild within the year. I pull my bag up over my shoulder as I walk through the halls for the last time.

"Park," I hear from behind me and I turn around to see Namjoon staring at me.

"Namjoon," I nod.

"I'm proud of you, Dr. Park." He smiles. "You've come a long way this past week."

"You're not going to get me to agree that I couldn't talk to Y/N this whole time," I tell him, raising an eyebrow.

"That's fair," he says, holding his hands up in defeat.

"But... thank you."

"Call me next week... we'll play golf."

"Pass." I laugh. "I've spent enough time with you the past week to last me through the New Year."

"I am hurt!" he says, putting a hand over his heart, jokingly. "Tell me I still get a wedding invite?"

"To be determined," I give him a smug grin and he slaps my back as we make our way through the lobby. I'm surprised I don't see Y/N inside as you can wait for your loved ones here but maybe she isn't here yet. "You told her what time, right?"

"Yes, I called her personally."

"How did she sound?" I ask.

"Anxious. She really missed you."

I grab my phone from the exit station as I make my way into the lobby. I unlock my phone and the wind is almost knocked out of me as I find dozens of texts and emails from Y/N, Hoseok and both of my parents. I open the most recent text from Y/N, sent just a few moments ago.

I'm outside! I was too worried I would cause a scene... I've yelled at a lot of people at this facility. Also, I wasn't sure if I was banned ha-ha.. And didn't want a bunch of people watching our reunion!

I chuckle reading her words, before I push through the double doors and make my way out into the December sunset. I see her car immediately and I smile when I see her bouncing excitedly next to the car.

How long has she been waiting out in the cold?

I move down the steps and her eyes finally find me and she takes off for me. I jog towards her, meeting her halfway when she stops suddenly looking me over as if she's not sure that I'm really standing in front of her.

The tears are flowing down her cheeks. "Hi," she whispers.

"Hi baby." I move towards her, closing the space between us.

She bites her bottom lip and looks me over again. "You look... really good," she says, the air leaving her lungs as she says it.

"I did a lot of running in there." She nods appreciatively and I feel a burst of pride by the way she's looking at me. I've lost a few pounds but I've gotten more toned, something I know Y/N can see even with my coat on given how well acquainted she is with my body.

"I'm going to lose it the second I touch you." She tells me as she wipes her nose with the sleeve of her coat.

"Same," I tell her.

She takes a step closer to me and I do the same. "I missed you... so much."

"I got your note," I tell her, the emotions of seeing her again building in my throat. "And your picture... That I'll now be carrying with me at all times. I didn't see either until Thursday and it was the turning point. You have no idea how much strength it gave me."

She puts her hand over her heart and smiles. "I'm so glad to hear that. I have a dozen more at home for you." She giggles.

"I wrote a bit while I was in there too..." I tell her. "My wedding vows are perfect." I smile and before I know it she's lunged for me, her arms and legs both wrapped completely around me and she's sobbing so hard she begins to shake in my arms.

"Oh my God." She cries. "I called and called and they wouldn't let me talk to you! They said I was a trigger and- I wasn't helping. I'm sorry! I just wanted to help and make sure you were okay and- I can't ever do this again! Not talk to you or see you! Please, promise me!" She's borderline hysterical as she sobs against me, her tears wetting my neck and sliding down my torso underneath my sweater and coat.

I press my hand to the back of her head keeping her pressed to me protectively as I carry her to her car. "I know you tried to call. Baby, I tried to get them to let me talk to you. And you're not a trigger, this is not your fault. Don't apologize." I reassure her as I stroke her back. "And nothing like this ever again, I promise." I whisper into her ear, as I'm fighting the tears myself hearing her plead with me that we never have to be apart again. "Never again," I repeat. I open the door to place her in the passenger seat when she clings to me even harder not wanting to let me go for anything. "Let's just get in the car, okay? It's cold out here."

She nods and lets me slide her into the car. I've barely shut the door on the driver's side before she climbs across the console and into my lap straddling me. Let me get us off the premises at least if you're going to try and mount me. I smile to myself.

"I was so worried when I couldn't get you on the phone. I thought they were doing something to you in there. Brainwashing you.. telling you that I wasn't good for you... that I did this to you."

"No one could convince me that you aren't good for me." I grab her face making her look at me. "No one. And you can't blame yourself, alright?"

She nods before she continues. "Then I thought maybe they weren't telling you I was calling and you thought I didn't care... that I stood you up on Family Day... Namjoon said he would tell you I was calling. Did he tell you?"

"Yes, baby. He told me. I knew you'd never forget me. I knew you cared from the beginning even before I realized they weren't letting us talk."

Her shoulders sag as if a weight has been lifted and she begins to stroke my jaw slowly, her eyes boring into mine. "What?" I ask her.

"I'm just... reacquainting myself with my favorite face. This is a little longer than usual," she says rubbing my facial hair, her fingertip tracing my jaw.

"They don't allow a whole lot of sharp objects in there."

"I like it." She smiles. "You are... still the most gorgeous man I've ever laid eyes on." She smiles as she runs her fingers through my hair and brings her forehead to mine. "Once I kiss you I don't know that I'll be able to stop." She bites her lip before letting them graze across my cheek, towards my chin and across the other cheek. They move across my nose and along my eyelids and land on my forehead having completely skipped over my mouth.

My cock stirs in my pants feeling her lips on me and I move my face attempting to capture her lips with mine. "Y/N." I murmur and she pulls back to look at me, her eyes full of lust.

"Kiss me, baby."

She lets her tongue dart out to wet her lips and tucks a hair behind her ear nervously as if she'd never kissed me before. God how is she so fucking sweet.

She lowers her lips to mine and places a gentle kiss on my lips. She lets out a tiny whimper as her soft lips find mine and she opens her mouth immediately allowing my tongue to snake into hers without hesitation. I move in time with hers, our mouths doing their familiar dance that we haven't done in seven days. I groan into her mouth as she pulls back slightly to nibble on my bottom lip. Her hands find the sides of my face and scratches gently as we continue to kiss like teenagers in a parking lot.

I don't know how long our lips are attached when we pull away, her lips swollen and red and slightly glossy from my spit and the tears that leaked out of both of our eyes while we kissed. "I missed you so much," I tell her as I cup her cheek. "I'm sorry I did this to us."

"You got better for me... and our baby. You have nothing to apologize for..." she trails off. "Unless..."

I can hear her mind working overtime and I press a finger to her lips silencing her and hopefully her thoughts as well. "I'm better. The best I've ever felt. But there are some things we need to discuss tomorrow."

She nods. "Bad?"

"Just things I haven't told you about my past. Things I want to leave in the past but I need to tell you so that I can assure they stay there."

"I'll help you with your baggage just like you've always helped with mine," she says and I'm unbelievably moved hearing her simple words.

She's in this with me, no matter what.

"How are you feeling?" I ask as I cup her cheek with one hand and rub her belly gently with the other.

"Good." She smiles. "No morning sickness and I've made an appointment with an OBGYN for two weeks from now. You'll come?"

"I'd follow you anywhere."

She smiles brightly before she kisses me gently again before she pulls away slightly. "Someone put an offer in on the house while you were gone," she says sadly and I feel like shit.

"Baby I'm so sorry I did that. I thought... that was something we hashed out in there." I nod towards the building. "I can't believe I did that."

She looks down sadly and then back at me. "We will find somewhere else. As long as we are together I'm happy."

"Let's talk about it tomorrow, I'm going to call the realtor and see if there's something that can be done. People back out of things like this all the time. Right now I just want to go home, take a hot bath and climb into bed with you until tomorrow afternoon."

"I think I like the sound of that."

I wrap my arms around her petite frame and bury my face in her neck. "I'm so happy to be home."

"Well you're not home yet." She chuckles.

"Yes I am." I whisper against her skin as I drag my lips up and lose myself in her kiss once more. 

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Author's Note: Thank you so much for 2K reads! You guys are so amazing! I can't thank you enough ❤️

-Serendipity