First looked at the bottle of drink, reading its composition.  One name sounded particularly funny, so he read it aloud, hoping the Khaotung would explain it to him.

"What the hell is this?"

"You know what?  I don't know, and I don't think I want to know, as long as I don't have to drink it".

Looking at Khaotung and his strange expressions, First couldn't help but burst out laughing.

"And what amuses you?"  — Tung asked, taking the bottle with the drink from the man's hands and starting to read the composition himself.  "Did they add something poisonous to your brain?"

"Uh, brain?  I have a brain?"

"Get over yourself, First!  This is not funny!" —  The driver tried to shush his new friend, but the more he tried to calm him down, the more he felt like laughing himself, even though First hadn't said anything funny, rather it had sounded stupid, so stupid it was pathetic and maybe  that was what made them both so funny.

Or they just drank too much alcohol for one day.

Tung was sure that the last possibility was the correct one.

Khaotung threw a book that flew across the room and landed near a metal trash can.  First looked at him questioningly.

"What's wrong you?"

"Grrrr!" — Khaotung only growled, still nervous about what he had read.

"I'm serious, are you okay?"

"Wonderful!" —  Kao exclaimed a bit too quickly and too nervously for First to believe it.

"May I know what made you so mad?"

"This nonsense!  Yes, Lewis is great and all, he was my biggest idol and the reason why I wanted to get into Formula 1 too, but this book must have been written by some fanboy of his.  Believe me, even Lewis Hamilton is not as perfect as they make him out to be".

"Seriously?"

"Yeah.  You'll understand when you meet him in person.  He's crazy, but in the best sense of the word, even though he can get angry, he can say a few nasty words to anyone, even though he usually tries to be nice.  And contrary to appearances, Lewis also sometimes gets carried away by emotions.  And he likes to do everything to spite.  Often, if someone tells him that something cannot be done, he will do it just to prove that it can be done.  He is a great idol and authority figure, but he has a few secrets that are not talked about out loud.  Plus, he panics too easily at times, but you've probably noticed that by watching the races and listening to the team radio.  As you can see, there are no perfect people, but there are those who work hard and try to improve and those who do everything to hinder them".

"And Verstappen?  Is he really that awful and rude?  Like when he didn't want to let Checo get more points?"

"No, it's also another thing exaggerated by the press and his haters.  Max is a nice guy, I think all drivers are fine these days.  Of course, some of us have better contact with journalists and fans, and sponsors like them more, but it's nothing unusual".

"You sound like they don't like you."

"Because they don't like me.  Gays are hated in this sport.  But I'm not allowed to talk about it out loud either".

"I won't tell anyone.  Well, except maybe Fourth".

"Fourth?  Who is this?"

"He's my little brother, he's okay, you can trust him, he's gotten me out of trouble a lot.  He will visit me today".

"Great, it will be fun to meet my fan's little brother". — Khaotung laughed and got out of bed to go to the bookshelf and choose another one for himself. — "Do you have anything here besides motorsport books?"

"Eeee..." — First looked at him helplessly with a clearly goofy expression, which caused another fit of laughter from Khaotung.  With First he laughed a lot and genuinely.  Here he didn't have to force a smile, with this slightly crazy boy he felt very comfortable and no wonder he didn't want to part with him.

"Well, why did I even ask? It's clear that's all you got here.  Well, I guess it's time I took you shopping".

"Erm...?  I'm not sure if that's a good idea".

"Why?  You will have something to take with you to Italy.  Also, I think you should enrich your world with some extra reading that isn't about my world".

"That's not the point. I'm afraid someone might recognize you.  I don't want you to get in trouble," — First explained, accidentally dropping a deck of Formula 1 drivers cards onto the floor, which disintegrated into what Khaotung humorously called entropy.  First had no idea what the entropy crap was, but from the F1 driver's mouth, everything sounded like nice music.

"Don't worry, I can do my makeup and no one will recognize me. I have my magic suitcase with me." — And indeed, Khaotung took what appeared to be a small rectangular aluminum suitcase from his backpack, placed it on the desk and opened it.  They both saw a variety of cosmetics, from lipsticks and lip glosses, through foundations, brighteners, concealers, to makeup removers and nail polishes.

"How did you cram it all into such a small space?"

"Magic." — Khaotung smiled proudly, having a great time at the expense of the shocked First, who took each cosmetic in his hand and looked at them carefully.  He couldn't openly admit that it was actually a magic box that looked small and light from the outside, but inside was actually roomy and roomy.  He could take them anywhere.  It was one of the many Magical inventions that Khaotung loved to use.

A few minutes later, they were both having a great time drawing lipstick on each other's faces.  First used scary red lipstick to paint Khaotung with three cute cat whiskers on both cheeks and a star on his forehead, and Khao created uneven hearts near the corners of First's eyes and a larger one on his chin.  At the same time, they looked at their reflections in the mirror and burst out laughing uncontrollably.  Khao clapped his hands, and First pointed out that they probably only drew more attention that way.

"Oh, you're right, it needs to be washed off," Khao — admitted and reached for cotton pads and makeup remover.  — "I suggest we confuse each other, it'll be more interesting."

"Are you trying to create a sweet moment?"

"And if so, what's wrong with that?"

"No, but could I take a souvenir photo of us first?" — First asked in a clearly hesitant, low voice, as if he was afraid he was asking too much, that he was crossing some line he shouldn't have crossed.  Above all, he didn't want to upset or offend Khaotung.

"Sure, that's a very good idea." — Khaotung praised him and took his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it and setting the camera function.  First positioned himself very close to him, and Kao put his arm around him.  They smiled at the camera, and after Kao had taken two shots, First stopped looking at the screen and focused on admiring the F1 driver's face up close.  He had to admit that there was something about Thanawat that gave his whole being an aura of mystery, the smell of a mystery that Kanaphan wanted to solve.  He had a vague feeling that Formula 1 was just a cover for Khaotung, that there was more to it, but he didn't know what.

Khaotung ruffled his hair, snapping him out of his reverie.

"What?" — He asked stupidly.

"No, nothing.  Okay, enough of this foolishness, let's put on some good make-up and go shopping, I have to show you some very important books that you should read that help me a lot myself.  Of course I could lend you my copies, but these are in English, and I think you'll like the Thai version better".

Soon they left the building dressed in dark clothes typical of First.  Kanaphan had personally done Khaotung's makeup, and now the two of them were walking through the city with identical black lines of eyeliner around their eyes, tiny freckles around and across their noses.

"I think we're even more conspicuous," —  Khaotung commented on their disguises as they passed an elderly woman who looked at them with contemptuous eyes.

"Maybe they're afraid of us. Don't worry about how hot you look to me".

"Thanks.  You are very sexy too.  So much so that I want to lock you in my room and not let you go anywhere, so no one can take you from me".

"Are you flirting with me?"

"And you with me?" —  He answered Khaotung's question with a wink.  First laughed.  With this strange new friend, he was just beginning to feel alive.  He had never laughed so much, never felt so good, completely forgetting his worries.  Khao brought color to his sad, colorless life, filled with gray and depression and sad memories, he was someone who believed in him and liked him just the way he was.  With him, he didn't have to put on a mask, pretend to be someone else, he could be fully himself.

* * *

Finally, after an hour of searching, Khaotung called First and walked over to the cash register, a stack of books on his shoulders, among which Kanaphan recognized titles such as The Little Prince, A Christmas Carol, 1984, and A Brief History of Time.  Khao even spotted a Thai-Italian and Italian-English dictionary.  The publications were so varied that First laughed at the sight of this collection, making Khaotung want to explain himself.

"These are books that have influenced me greatly, and I'm curious to hear what you think after you've read them."

"Do you read dictionaries?  I thought you only use them".

"Stupid".

Khaotung paid for all the copies, throwing them into a rucksack and into a bag slung over his friend's shoulder.

"Okay, okay, I'll read it," — First agreed. — "What do you have planned for today?"

"How about a visit to the zoo?"

"Uh?"

Seeing his hesitation, Khao grabbed his arm and pulled him along.  He didn't care at all about the people staring at them curiously, or the fact that First didn't seem to like crowded places, which he thought the zoo was.

"You're dragging me somewhere again."

"Of course, you're my friend now, and I've always dreamed of going to the zoo with a friend."

"But you and Charles were at the zoo? Did I mix something up?"

“Charles was,” — Khao sighed. —  “They didn't even ask me if I wanted to go.  I am only Thai to them, Charles is closer to them.  But it doesn't matter because we both work equally hard, and that's why I'd like it to work out just once.  Except Charles has a contract and I don't, so this is my last chance.

There was so much bitterness and sadness in his words that First felt like hugging him and comforting him, making all his worries disappear and be replaced with something more positive.  Khaotung looked like he was about to cry.  First was only slightly surprised at how quickly his mood could change.  He jumped rapidly from genuine joy and laughter to gloomy reverie and sadness.

"You know what?  Before we go to the zoo, I think we should stop somewhere and rest.  You've been carrying a huge burden on your shoulders for many years, and I'm not surprised you've had enough".

For Khaotung, this statement meant one thing: only another equally wounded, damaged and trampled soul is able to understand another equally suffering soul, and its owner was currently hugging him.  Thanawat let First lead him to his favorite, not too crowded pizzeria, where they both ordered two different pizzas.  It was Fourth who showed it to his brother, hinting that it was one of NuNew's favorite places.  Before the dishes were served to them, they had some time to discuss a few points.  First was not going to let go.  He wanted Khao to tell him everything, to take the burden off his heart by sharing it with him.

"It's always easier to carry the burdens of life when we share them with someone." — He pointed out correctly, and Khaotung nodded appreciatively.

"You're right, though I never thought you were such a philosopher."

"You've only known me for a few days.

“Oh, that's true too.  But you surprised me anyway".

"In a positive or negative sense?"

"In a very positive way.  Although I'm a little sad because I wish you didn't understand me so well because it means your life has been hard".

“It wasn't too bad, I still consider myself lucky“.

"Lucky with depression?"

"Uhm.  It's complicated." — First clearly hesitated.  Sure, there was something about this almost stranger that made him talk about everything very freely, as if they had known each other for years and there was no social class barrier between them, First was just a boy who had to drop out of college because of his health and never  didn't finish, so he considered Khaotung as successful man, whom he envied a bit, but realizing that Khao earned everything himself, he did not get anything for free, just like he started from scratch, and this was one of the reasons why  he felt even worse: he compared his life to others and felt that he had lost, that he wasted every opportunity he had.  He tried several times to get a job somewhere, but he was refused everywhere.  It hurt him.  He knew he had failed, and that was why he tried so hard to end what seemed to him a series of misfortunes.

"Let's do this: you tell me about yourself, and I'll tell you about myself.  What do you think?"

“Okay, be with you.  All in all... At most I'll lose another friend, I guess I'm used to it by now".

First felt that perhaps he was being overly dramatic.  He'd heard so many times that he was exaggerating, that things weren't so bad and there was no reason to be depressed.

"Many people think that I am lucky: I don't have to work, my parents transfer money to my account every month, I have my own apartment where I can do whatever I want, I have freedom and freedom, but ... I don't feel happy at all.  Truth be told, I'm fucking lonely out there.  I have a brother who supports me and he is basically the only person who understands me.  Our parents haven't kicked him out because they don't yet know he's gay too, but if they found out... I advised him not to tell them, I know it's hard for him but I don't want them to despise him like  they despise me.  I used to have friends, but it turned out that they were friends with me because of my parents' money and influence, I didn't matter for them.  I fought, I tried, but when they found out about my lack of education and experience, no one wanted to give me a chance, I understood that I had failed, it was my own fault, I should have studied better, I had to do more.  No one knows what I've been through, I've long since come to the conclusion that no one will understand me, and I've stopped looking for companionship.  If you hadn't come my way...

"First... Friend, you can't rate yourself so low because of how others look at you.  Your intentions are important to me.  I've known you for a while, although it seems like too little time, but believe me, it's enough to see your good heart, that you care about others, which often ends up hurting yourself.  You demand a lot from yourself because you don't want to disappoint those you love.  Let me tell you something else: if someone truly loves you, their demands on you will center around making you happy.  Perhaps it's too early for you to make such declarations, but let us both be a happy future for each other, since the past has not spared us".

Khaotung didn't expect a positive answer, he was prepared for First to refuse him.  It was as if he had asked him to be his boyfriend so early in their relationship.  He may have missed a few steps, but what was important to him was how calm and happy he felt around him.  He could be crazy and goofy all he wanted, and First would only respond with amused laughter, which acted as a healing balm for his wounded heart, thirsting for true and sincere love, longing for fair and honest treatment.