"Die you son of a bitch stop killing all of my horses!"

"....."

"Fucking dragons always attacking me!"

"....."

"Hold up babe let me kill this fucker."

"...okay..."

"Alright done. So anything new?"

"It's my birthday..."

"Oh cool. Did you know the elves in this game are a bunch of racist? It's like how the world is today. The new world elves hate the old world elves just because they took their lands. I find that racist and blah blah blah blah blah---"

One hour later full of blahs

"--And that's why I'm a lizard in the game."

*****

I think back in all of our moments and I'm like what the fudge did I ever see in him? All we do is stupid and that I'm pretty much aware of it. Then why haven't I given him a piece of my mind yet? Ever since he told me he broke up with Victoria to be with me but only ended up going back to her because I ignore him for a week, left me feeling empty.

I felt like a plastic bag.

Just floating down empty streets not knowing when I will stop. I'm just here without a real purpose. Used but then thrown away only to be forgotten why I was there in the first place.

In the beginning it was all nice and perfect but as the times slowly goes by I start to realize how...dull...my life is.

Here I am liking a guy who is already taken and just being the awkwardly second girl in his life that apparently he still wants me and yet I do nothing of the situation but play along.

There were times I wanted to talk to my friend Rose of this empty feeling but then I think again and decide not to. I'm afraid she is going to judge me. She always hated Juan from the start and here I had a secret from her. She doesn't know I'm playing lover with a guy she clearly hates. I have all of my emotions bottled up in my chest with no one to talk to. The fear of being judged was too much for me so I would cry in my dreams and wake up numb in the mornings like nothing.

Then there was option B and that was to talk to Merlyn. Though I know what all of her remarks would be and her thoughts always would be in the gutters so I skipped her.

Other than that, the thought of not telling anyone was killing me so I told everything to Selina.

She heard me out and gave me heck of a lot of advices.

One of them stood out to me the most.

Me: I just don't know what to do anymore.

Selina: I think he's not worth it. You should be with a guy who is going to love just you. A guy who is going to pick you as his first.

That for sure as heck sounds nice. I'm fed up being someone's second. The moment I finished texting to Selina, I knew what I had to start doing in the next few days.

December 2, 2017~

My parents hosted a "small" family reunion at our house. My sister came, my brother in law, my nephew and niece, and a heck of a lot of cousins. Rose was included as well and thank God she came because I was stress free from kids for at least a day. While Rose was out being tortured by the kids I managed to escape for a while and went to my backyard and sat on a rock stone behind a tree. Juan was calling and like always I had to answer like my life depending on it.

"Hey sexy."

"Hey."

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Nothing much having a family party at my place."

"Oh cool. Hey Sammy you owe me money man."

"...."

And like always he got distracted.

I decided to take a walk knowing this call will take a while so I got up and started to wander around my back yard. Kids ran by me as I just walked on. I was going to walk around and go to the front porch when out of nowhere my older sister Nancy ran towards me and quickly dragged me back to the backyard.

"What's wrong sis?" I was breathing heavily.

"Dad is coming out to the front. He's looking for you."

"Does he knows what I'm doing?" I felt my heart start to race. If my father finds out I'm talking to a guy out here instead of playing with my cousins and all he was going to throw an angry fit.

"No he thinks your playing out here with the kids."

"Dani?" Juan's voice came out from my phone.

"Is that your boyfriend?" Nancy smirked.

"No." I felt my face go hot.

"No wonder you hiding out here. Don't worry I won't tell dad just be careful." She ran to the back porch and entered the house.

Phew! That was a close one.

"Dani where the hell are you?" Juan was talking to me again.

I rolled my eyes and went back to the stone rock and sat.

"I'm still here."

"What the fuck with all of that noise?"

"I told you I have a family party going on here."

"Oh yeah cool."

"Yeah..."

From behind me I heard footsteps crunching on leaves. I frantically looked back and saw Rose approaching me.

"Okay um I have to go now."

"What the hell? Why?"

"Rose is looking for me and it's not right to ditch her."

"Screw her. I still want to talk to you."

Oh sure "now" you want to talk to me.

"I'll call you tomorrow maybe."

"Maybe? Fuck Dani you don't talk to me anymore."

"Dude I have to go."

"Okay fine," he sighed. "I got to get back to work anyways. Love you."

"Love you too." I quickly hung up but it was too late, Rose was already in front of me.

"Oooo you love who?" She smirked.

She wouldn't be smirking if she found out which guy I said it to.

"Nobody important." I got up.

"You don't say "love you" to nobody important."

"Just a guy." I rolled my eyes.

"What guy?" She asked.

We walked together to my back porch and I sat on a hammock we have back there as Rose sat on a stool in the corner. She was and is my best friend. She was practically like my sister. I felt tears start to form in my eyes and I couldn't take it anymore. Being the plastic bag sucked.

"It's Juan isn't it..." Her little smirk faded away.

"...yes..." 

"I kind of saw that coming. So you two together now?"

"That's just it. We are not. I'm just...his side chick."

That night I ended up confessing my secret to Rose. At the end it all went good. I don't know why on earth I thought she was going to judge me in the first place. She understood me and I was glad I had her as my friend. She was there when I most needed her. Then later on in the night we both ended up revealing our secrets to my sister Nancy before she left and boy did it felt good to let it all out.

"Grow some balls and let yourself be respected." Nancy said.

I think I do know what to do now...

*****

December 5, 2017~

Damian: What time is your lunch?

Me: 12:00

Damian: Did you bring the stuff?

Me: yes

Damian: okay see you at my place

This girl had a mission.

I'm going to see Damian to help him with a back problem he has. I told him a few days ago I know a special treatment that my family and I know of which was good for curing. So we decided to pick this day for me to help him.

At exactly 12:00pm I finished the file I was working on and quickly clocked out from my computer and got in my car. Just a few weeks ago I bought myself a car for my birthday on October with a little help from my Dad. It was a green suburban and boy was I in love with it. I named him Callado meaning Quiet and yes my car is a "he". My mom thinks its too big for me but to be honest I like big cars than the little ones. It just felt good being slightly taller, scaring all the little cars below me. Anyways Damian sent me a text with his address and off I went with Callado to look for him.

I never left out from work during my lunch break. This was all new for me. As I was driving I had all of these thoughts swarming in my head. One of them being: what the heck am I doing???

I arrived to Damian's place where he lived. It was a small house and there were a few cars parked outside. He was already out in the porch waiting for me. I got out from my car and locked it and slowly approached him.

This was my second time seeing him in person.

"Hey." He smiled.

"Um hey." I smiled nervously.

Ever since he got drunk that night, it had been like two days since we last spoken to each other. We awkwardly stood there until he finally compose himself and invited me in. I never been in a guy's place before. I slowly took a step in and checked my surrounding. The place was legit freezing cold inside.

"Did you eat lunch?" He asked. As he led me down the small hallway to his room.

"Um no. I skipped it today in order to help you."

"Princess you could get sick." He gave me a small worried smile.

"Eh it's just lunch. I'll eat a lot when I get home."

He opened the door to his room and stopped.

"Um I have a mess in my room." He scratched the back of his head.

"So? I came here to fix your back not to judge your room." I gave a slight laugh.

"Okay Princess don't tell me I didn't warn you."

He opened his door wide for me to entered and I took a small step inside. When he said mess I imagined it to be worse but instead it wasn't so bad. His room was small containing only a small bed, a desk, a small TV, and two loud speakers that were meant to be in a car. The only mess to be there were a pair of shoes in front of his bed, a few quarters on the ground, and a packet of cigarettes just laying there.

"Not bad." I walked in and sat on the edge of his bed while opening my backpack I carried along.

"You're saying that just to be nice." He laughed.

"No it's true. I think mine is worse. I just call my mess art though." I joked.

He laughed and every time he laughed I couldn't help but to smile.

"So what do I do?" He asked after we talked for a while.

"Just lay on the bed belly down."

"Like this?" He laid on the bed just how I told him to.

"Yes perfect." I searched in my backpack and pulled out a lighter, a glass cup, a quarter, a candle, and vapor rub.

"What the heck you got a lighter for?" He nervously laughed as he lifted his head to look.

"You'll see." I put everything to the side and opened the vapor rub. "Though I think you might...um... need to take your shirt off..."

"Okay." He took his shirt off and got back into place.

I dipped two fingers in the vapor rub and ran it down his bare back. I put one full hand onto his back and felt a long shiver run down his spine.

"Geez Princess your hands are freezing cold." He was laughing.

"I'm sorry." I squeaked and quickly retracted my hand away.

"No it's okay. You're okay." He said.

I gave a nervous smile and put both of my hands back on his back. I never done this before and what I was about to do was never done by me. I only seen my parents done it a few times to a few of my cousins and brother law yet I decided to leave that little detail information out to Damian. I started to massage his back and couldn't help but to trace a few small scratches he had on his back.

"I have scratches huh?"

"Yeah but not bad just a few." I said.

"That's good I usually get more bruises or blisters from work."

"You never told me what type of job you have." I started to massage the back of his neck.

"I mean it's no big deal like yours. I put concrete on houses and stuff."

"No big deal? Dude that's a big deal. You do a big part."

"You think so?" He smiled. "I mean to some it's considered low class. I'm just a poor guy working with concrete.

"I don't see it that way. I admire that. Unlike some people who like being lazy asses or doing shady business, I see nothing wrong with your job."

"Ay princesa. You're really sweet."

"I've been told that a lot." I laughed.

By now I had finished massaging his back. He was about to get up thinking we were done when I quickly put a hand back on his back to make him get down again.

"Not so fast I'm still not done with you."

I placed a quarter right on the center of his back and got my lighter.

"Um Princess are you sure this is safe?" The flame reflected on his wide brown eyes.

"Of course."

I mean someone had to be positive about it.

I put the flame on the candle and it lit up. Some of the wax I poured it on the candle and carefully I placed the small candle onto the quarter.

"Okay this won't hurt one bit." I told him.

"Are you?" He seemed worried.

Well I mean no duh this is his first time and mine. Heck this was all new to him but I was sure all was going to go good. I had it in my blood. This is going to be easy peasy.

Next I grabbed the glass cup and before the flame died out I place the cup onto the candle and pressed it hard with both of my hands down. The flame was being sucked out as the skin of his back started to rise forming the shape of a circle. The flame turned off but it was a success. The cup was sucking the skin just like it was meant to. It was a weird process but it was a 100% guaranteed to be curable for back pains. As the cup did its thing I kneeled down next to his bed and waited for five minutes to take its time. As we waited I decided to finally ask him something that had been bugging me for a few days.

"Why did you get drunk that night?"

His shoulders stiffened but then he quickly relaxed and turned his head to face me. His brown eyes met with my green ones as I waited for his answer.

"I don't get drunk like that. Here in America I've only gotten drunk like that only three times. That was my third time that night. I have problems over there in Mexico and well I had too much that night. I'm sorry if I scared you." His expression was sad.

"Don't be it's okay. It's just...ever since I felt something different of you." I took the cup out from his back making the rise skin that got sucked, get back to normal as I started to do the same procedure again.

"What type of different? Bad one?" He asked.

"No no not bad just more like...weird...I don't know like you being off. Know what I mean?" I tried explaining.

"I guess because I feel lonely." He tried to smile but failed. "All my family are in Mexico and I feel like at times I want to go back."

The mention of him going back made my heart tighten for some reason.

"Why did you come here then?" I asked.

"To work. But ever since my visa got stolen I feel not wanted in this country. People look at you bad and worse if you don't know how to speak the language. I just feel out of place you know? And with my family over there giving me stress about money I guess that's why I got carried away that night."

I nodded not wanting to ask the next thing but I had to, so I did.

"Why don't you go back then?"

After all this talking I haven't realized I did already six of them cups so I stopped to listen to his answer and stared at the six circles he had marked on his back.

"I have another reason to stay now." He sat up as I placed my stuff back into my backpack.

"What is it?"

He gave me a small smile and I could see his face start to blush. I don't know why he was blushing when the only one who should be blushing was me because I was staring at him shirtless. Now we were both blushing. And inside I was going didhdbxjdibendjd just a bunch of random letters going on in my head and my butterflies activating on full destruction to my stomach.

Here I was in a shirtless guy's room trying not to drool and he was blushing just because I asked what was holding him back. What could be so important that he finds a reason to stay instead to go back to his family?

"It's not a it." He put his shirt back on.

"Who is the reason why you want to stay now?" I got more vapor rub and got his wrists to start massaging it.

He smiled at me and quickly asked me if that was part of the treatment.

"No it's just a secret thing my parents do to everyone at the end."

"Are you guys witches?" He joked.

"No fool." I laughed. "Now don't change the subject. Who is this?"

"You."

I stopped what I was doing and looked up at him.

That feeling I had of being a plastic bag?

Yeah that was gone.

And from there I knew what I had to do.

The right thing.