"Danielle?"

I was sitting in my doing my art project when Mr. Reid, my art teacher, called my name. I looked up as he stood in front of the class and all eyes were on me.

"Last night the seniors had a award ceremony. You weren't there though." He spoked.

I rose an eyebrow not sure why he was telling me this. The first time I won a award was in my freshmen year for my Spanish class. Ever since then I never won anything so I never attended the ceremonies.

"I thought you were going to be there Danielle." Mr. Reid pulled out something from behind him.

My mouth slowly opened as I finally realized what it was.

"Your award Danielle."

Everyone in the room started to clap and cheer for me as I stood up and felt excitement fill my face. Mr. Reid handed me a small clear container with a medal inside.

"Mr. Reid!" A girl called out. "Give us a speech why you giving Danielle a award."

I felt my face go red in embarrassment. I've never had this much attention before.

"Well let's see...Danielle you have been an excellent student. Always passing my class and I have had you for two years and I have seen you improve so much in your art. You clearly have talent and I expect to see someday your works in museums. Art is clearly your passion and I expect you to keep practicing your talented skill. So this award goes to Danielle for being the best art student. Only thing I have to say bad about you is that you were sure the loudest in my class." He joked at the part me being loud.

Everyone laughed at the last part.

"Thank you so much." I thanked Mr. Reid with a huge smile and went back to my seat.

Everyone clapped again and I couldn't help but to feel happy about myself.

Later that day I was called to the principal office thinking I was in trouble. Instead Mr. Boring gave me another medal.

"For keeping your GPA always high for four years." He said.

For the first time I was being noticed.

And I was happy.

~*~

"Yeah I'm going to miss you guys..."

"Same."

"Yeah."

"I won't."

Juan, Kaitlynn, and me all turned to face Rose with a bored expression.

We were having a moment and Rose ruins it.

"Though I will miss you Dani with all my heart and shizz!"

"Awww." I laughed.

We were outside in the patio during lunch all four of us in a bench. Juan between Kaitlynn and I and Rose to my other side. I was carrying his head on my lap while Kaitlynn had his legs.

This was it.

My perfect highschool dream.

I had two awesome best friends that were with me through thick and thin, a guy who I was so deeply crazy for even so it was complicated, and at last I was happy and no longer mute.

It took me four fucking years for this???

I look at my small group of friends and smile. It took a while but it was worth it.

This was only a memory from a few days ago but now...

June 3, 2017~

I opened my eyes and stared at myself in the mirror. Today was the last day of school.

Last day of highschool for me.

And as a special day I wanted to end this year with a bang. I'm going to bring the whole house down alright. I smirk at my reflection and opened my eyes wide as I did my mascara. I never was into makeup but today I found myself doing it. My eyes were extra green today making me finally realize that I was beautiful all along. I went for a shade of red lipstick and straightened my hair.

Hehehe sexy.

Three years ago I was the nerd.

Dressed in baggy pants and hoodies and always wore my hair in a pony tail.

Joe found that attractive...

Then I was the rebel.

Dressed all in black and wore dog teeth and cow horns as jewelry.

Emilio liked it.

Now here I am changing everything once again.

I wanted to be seen. Even if it was for the last day...

~*~

"I miss you already."

We were in the highest last stands in the main gym all by ourselves. He rested his back against the wall and pulled me in his arms so I can lay down close to his chest. I could hear his soft heart beats as I closed my eyes and smiled. He would pet my hair and caress my shoulders as we quietly waited there. While all the seniors were busy getting their caps and gowns ready for the senior breakfast that the teacher put up, Juan and I decided to enjoy every last minutes to ourselves.

"Oh Dani if only I met you earlier." He kissed the top of my head.

Jdidjenxksjendowndh!!!!!

I felt my whole body warm up. Excitement ran through my veins and my heart accelerated at the small kiss.

"Last day and soon we are going to be free." He said.

Free...

I wanted to be free but sadly I was still trapped. Graduating high school was just the first step to freedom for me. God knows when I'll actually be free.  I hugged him and we stayed like that for quite a while.

"Juan?"

"Yes?"

"I--"

I stopped.

There was so many things I wanted to tell him but so little time. This was it. The last day to everything...

Some of the seniors started to come in and take their seat for the last practice until the real thing. Even as the people entered, we still laid there, cuddling like if we were a thing.

He will actually be the one thing I'm going to miss about highschool.

He looked at me with his cute brown eyes and gave me a small smile knowing that whatever I was going to say, wasn't going to come out.

"Seniors take your seats." The principal told us.

"I'll see you in a bit." He kissed my forehead and together we descended down from the stands.

"In a bit." I whispered as he gave me one last smile and went to his seat.

I was four rows behind him. All through out the practice I would stare at the back of his head and smile like a lovestruck fool. Only a few times I would get distracted because the guy in front of me was no other than Bradley.

Bradley the fucking hot tree.

He was popular, tall (seriously freaking tall), hot, hilarious...

"Hi Danielle!" He gave me a high five.

I gave him a nervous grin feeling my cheeks start to blush.

Man why did all the cute guys have to be taken?!

"H-Hi!" My voice squeaked.

"Oh wow Danielle you say hi to him and not to me?" Another voice spoked with a laugh.

I turned to my right to see Julio (My third grade bully) sitting next to the guy I was sitting next to.

Julio without knowing ruined a part of my childhood. I used to be happy and cheery all the time, heck I would be a complete blabbermouth. But thanks to him making fun of me in third grade during lunch, I went mute.

And here he was again after about nine years later, he at least got my name. This has been our fourth encounter after third grade that he spoke to me.

"Hi to you too." I smiled.

He smiled at me and then started to talk to the other people sitting in front of him and behind him.

I could say I finally made an impression.

Now back to staring at the back of Juan's head...

Sighssss....

Suddenly my phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw Juan's number. This was the first time he texted me.

Juan: I love you.

Those three words...

I love you too. I replied back.

Juan: :-*

I looked up and saw Juan winked at me from the front. That one emoticon sent them butterflies to their deaths. I was internally squealing and mentally scolding for something I shouldn't be this excited about.

I didn't know how to reply back to that kiss. So instead I sent him an emoticon of my own.

('-')/*

What is that? He texted back.

I caught your kiss...

~*~

"Aren't you going to eat?" Juan asked as he picked out some donuts from the line.

"Nah I'll pass."

"Why?"

I eyed at the donuts lustfully but fought against it.

"Dani come on eat. Our quadruplets need food."

Wait whut...

He smirked and chuckled as he grabbed my hand and took us to a table with two free spots just for us.

He didn't insist anymore in making me eat thank God but still that one comment...

Did I hear it wrong?

And just like if he was reading my mind, he answered it.

"And yes Dani I said quadruplets. So when are my kids going to be born?"

"A-are you calling me fat?" I faked gasped.

"Just a little since you are carrying our kids." He winked.

The whole breakfast thing went for like two hours. There was the pictures slide show of all the seniors. Mine came out blank since they had no pictures of me.

Typical...

And then there was a few teachers who gave small speeches about the students all through out the years. Mainly the popular ones.

I was glad when the whole whatever-it-was, was over.

They dismissed all the seniors to leave early and ordered us to no longer be inside the highschool.

One year ago on this exact same day I ran off with Joe. I got in his car and didn't care where he took me. Results ended bad when my brother snitched to my parents of my mistake. And it was all for nothing too.

Look where Joe is now.

I stood outside with Juan as we waited for our rides. My parents weren't coming until 12:00pm and it was 10:00pm right now. With no ride for me, I had to stay and wait for my brother to come out. He had to still attend classes until noon. Though I didn't care because I had Juan next to me.

"Okay my ride is coming until eleven. Want to go back inside?" He said.

"We are not allowed to go back in though." I leaned against the brick wall.

"So?" He smirked. "I'm a bad boy, rules like that don't apply to me. Would you like to be my bad girl today?" He winked.

I mentally swoon and instantly said yes not caring about rules for once. Juan took my hand and led me back inside the highschool. We decided to wander the halls for a bit before a random teacher would catch us. Juan needed to get his art project and suggested we quickly go there. We went to the art room and he quickly retrieved his project. As we walked down the empty halls Juan asked a question.

"If I wasn't dating would you have gone out with me?"

I started to fidget with my hands and felt my cheeks start to blush.

"Y-yes of course."

"Why?"

I slowed down my walking and nervously looked to my sides, not knowing what to say.

He just chuckled and grabbed my hand.

"It's okay I know. Answer this though... Are you going to be available in a few years?"

"What do you mean available?" I asked.

"In case something happens between Victoria and I....would you be my girl having the chance?"

"Yes." I said it without any hesitation.

His lips formed a smiled and we continued walking on until we found an empty hallway and found some seats for us. He laid down and got me to lay down on him with my head resting on his chest. His arms wrapped around me from behind and together we laid their in each others arms.

It was perfect.

It took me years to say I love you.

To hug back.

To hold someone's hand.

To speak without stuttering.

And here with Juan it only took me two months.

His sweet scent filled my lungs and the sound of his heart matched with mine. He would kissed my hair and aligned our hands together. He spoke about his dreams, his future, his life, and whispered a song to my ear.

Heck he even made a poem to me. Even if it ended with fuck here and shit there whenever he would stutter and mess up his poetic lines, it was still sweet that he tried.

"I look into your green eyes and I find myself lost. Your personality brings me life and your smile is the sun to my heart. It guides me out from my lost world and I only have one thing to say to you....I love you Danielle. And I don't give a fuck that it didn't rhyme." He laughed.

I laughed at his cute attempt and then suddenly it got quiet.

He was looking at me right now. All I could do was raise an eyebrow as he put a strand of my hair behind my ear. I closed my eyes as he put his thumb on my cheek and did small circles.

"Can I ask you a question?" He whispered.

"Anything."

"What would you do if I kiss you?"

I fluttered my eyes open and stared into his brown eyes and then it went down to his lips.

"I....I don't know."

"Would you like to know?" He placed his hand on my cheek.

Yes...

"W-what about y-your girlfriend?" I flustered.

"This is between you and me, Dani." He smiled.

"Yes but you still have a girlfriend." I frowned.

"Dani...look at me." He gently lifted my face to stare into his eyes. My eyes though trailed down to his lips. "Just a kiss that is all I ask. Just one okay?"

"Just one..."

Without thinking twice I closed the gap.

He kissed me and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words would never be. His hand rested below my ear, his thumb caressing my cheek as our breaths mingled. I closed my eyes as the little conscious tried to intervene in the moment.

He has a fucking girlfriend, Danielle...

I opened my eyes and a small gasp escaped from my lips.

What have I done????

"No no no this is wrong." I gave him my back. He hugged me from behind and pulled me closer to his chest. Our legs entangled together as he had his back on the seat and mine on his chest. He slowly turned my face to look at me and he smiled.

"Dani forget that. For one second forget that I have a girl and relax."

"Easy for you to say I'm kissing my friend who has a girlfriend. What does that makes me huh?"

"My lover." He leaned in, brushing his lips with mine.

I closed my eyes again and felt the warmness of our lips brushing.

The deal was just one...

But I wanted more.

I closed the gap once again.

Someone's going to catch you, Danielle...

I pushed my stupid conscious all the way to the back of my head and enjoyed my moment.

I'm going to do all it takes to be happy.

At least for one moment.

I took in as much as I could. I never have enjoyed a long kiss before until now. My fingers ran through his hair and my breathing became heavy. I was in fucking cloud nine. I was dying and dying and dying...dying because it was so good yet so wrong.

We slowly parted. I was the one to part first. As much as I wanted to go on...I couldn't. I felt addicted to his lips already.

"You need more practice." He smirked.

"It's been a while. Actually you're the first one I gave in for the fullest."

With the other two they were quick and small. With Juan though I felt passion, desire, craving...

I really wanted more.

I wanted him to be mine.

Oh lord I sound like a freaking possessive alpha.

I smirked at him and looked away. This was too good to be true.

He grabbed my hand making me look back at him. He rested his forehead against mine and we stayed like that smiling.

They never last. Nobody does. They say the love me...they say they're my friend...they say forever...say they they will stay....

But the truth...

They always leave. Everyone leaves.

One moment they're there and the next they're gone. Either they disappear without a word, or leave me for no reason. Break my heart, break my trust, break dreams. I've been there and I'm used to it. It hurts me that deep down I know it will just happen again.

I look into Juan's eyes and seem to find myself lost in them.

I am lost.

Once again I'm seeing all the signs there and still want to do a mistake.

I want to do it though.

I know what I'm facing against.

I know the consequences.

I know the wrong I'm about to do but either way I still want to commit the same mistake I've been doing for the last four years of my life.

I want to fall again.

For the wrong person...

"If I asked you...this is just a what if question...would you accept being my lover if I told you? My backup? My friend with benefit?" His voice came out breathy.

"....."

It's not how we make mistakes, but how we correct them that defines us.

The corrections are what makes us stronger,wiser,better...

"Yes," I said. "I would accept...still talking in the what if situation though."

You make mistakes but learn from them by correcting all the bad in it.

Yeah I make mistakes but that is what makes me human. I can do corrections just it's more complicated than what it is.

"Okay then...forget all what if....Dani... do you want to be the other girl?"

Correction is the wanting of change. The beginning of something new. I repeat myself everyday that I will fix all the bad in the past and learn from it. I legit repeat the word correction over and over...

But a part of me doesn't want to do it...not yet at least.

"Yes."

I agreed. I agreed to be the other girl.

Unlike my other mistakes, I was conscious of what I was doing. I'm willing to risk it. I'm willing to take chances and get it over with it. I want to and I will commit a mistake.

I'm doing it just so I can feel again...

He leaned close to me, brushing his lips once again with mine. No kissing happened after that just the close distance we were experimenting.

A random boy walked by and took a seat next to an empty seat to ours. The random boy wasn't so random though.

My school was filled with people with the exact same names. Only mine so far was the only. Though Juan's...there were plenty.

The boy was Juan and he was one of my brother's friend last year. The kid tried to ask me out just because he liked my eyes and was being played by Ana. She told "good" things to him so Juan the little freshmen tried asking me out. I remembered I sent him down the tubes and ever since then he has been giving me the stink eye.

Boy Juan locked eyes with me.

I roller my eyes at him and focused better at the man Juan. Now this one knew how to get to my heart.

"Dani!"

I quickly sat up straight with Juan as Rose was coming down the hall with Kalvin behind her. I stood up with Juan and waited for them to arrive.

"Dani I missed you!"

"I missed you too." I laughed at Rose.

"Oh my goshhhh you two finally graduating." Kalvin said.

"Yup I'm going to miss you Chinito."

"Same." Juan chuckled.

"Oh my gosh I'm going to miss Juan." He adjusted his glasses. "I'm going to miss being Juan's punching bag."

We all laughed.

Juan stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist as we talked with Rose and Kalvin. Rose though shot angry glares at Juan but he ignored her and keep saying me softy side to the side.

Suddenly the bell rang and it was time for Rose and Kalvin to go.

"See you guys tonight at the graduation." Kalvin said before running off.

Once they left it was only Juan and I. And the other Juan who kept eyeing us like a freaking hawk but we didn't care. We went back to the seats and this time I carried his head on my lap.

"I love you Dani."

"I love you too Juan."

Behind us there was a tap on the big glass window.

We looked back to see a guy.

"Shit my ride came." Juan sat up and stretched.

I didn't want him to go....

He grabbed his stuff from the floor and just when he was about to stand straight, I kissed him on the cheek.

He froze and the biggest smile crossed his lips.

"I love you." I told him.

"I love you too." He kissed my forehead for a long minute and ran off.

My eyes followed him as he ran out the highschool building and got in the car.

And I felt lonely.

It wasn't five minutes when suddenly my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"I miss you already."

I laughed.

I missed him as well.

Real bad.