A/N-
Not sure if anyone is still reading this but I will continue to upload chapters when I can. I always said I will finish this book no matter how long it takes ☺️
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Enjoy!
Xx

I truly hoped that everything would be a blur when I woke in my bed the following morning, but unfortunately, my mind was plagued by the events of the previous day. The cotton pillow was sodden straight through, and cold against my swollen cheek, a result of my uncontrollable sobbing throughout the night. Regrettably I could remember everything like clockwork. From swallowing the sedatives and slipping beneath the water flow, to finishing up with an IV protruding from my arm. Hunter remained by my side incessantly, a broken mess of tears and soggy tissues. That was the hardest part, being responsible for his torment. Every tear he shed tore apart my insides, like a bullet gouging a great hole through me. And that's when it sunk in, and I realised how much pain my actions had caused. When your mind is in such a terrible frenzy, it's a consideration you completely ignore.

But that's what happens when people are desperate to escape reality. When they're so blinkered by the fear of what's to come that they can't bear to face another day.

The minute I received the text at Jacobs house, was the minute I decided I would rather die than go through the pain and torture I experienced in that monsters clutches. Looking back now, It was a rash decision, but no one could advise me otherwise. The need to get out, the feeling of suffocation was drowning me, so completely overwhelming. I not only had to remove myself from Jacob's house, but I had to remove myself from existence too.

Of course, now I understand that it was the most selfish of options. Sure, it ends my suffering for good, but simply transfers it to those that you leave behind. I could not put Hunter through that again. Ever. But no matter how much I tried to convince him that I wouldn't replay my actions, he just didn't believe me.

And who could blame him really?

When I awoke from my deep sleep, Hunter was there, and followed me around the house like a puppy dog ever since. He was waiting patiently for me to talk to him, to explain what happened last night. But I couldn't bring myself to discuss it with him. Every time I caught a glimpse of his face, a staggering guilt swamped me. To stop myself from bawling my eyes out all over again I had to avert my eyes. The absolute last thing I wanted to do was relive the events in my head, to remember things that I had wanted to leave far behind in my past.

So I did the only thing I knew how to in a situation like this. Escape.

It wasn't easy to slip past the keen eye of my brother. But somehow, I managed. Whilst he was busying himself making a cup of coffee I grabbed the car keys from the usual hook which they hung, and dashed from the house to the car.

The car groaned as I revved the engine, and took off down the road at speed, disappearing way before Hunter could even reach the front door.  Of course, as a result my phone rang repeatedly, pleading for me to answer it the whole journey to town. With a heavy sigh, I pull up into the familiar car park outside my place of work. My fingers race to type a short message, which I send to my brother at the click of a button.

Please don't worry. I'm just at work. Xx

Almost instantaneously, another text flashes up.

Dammit Kitty! You and me will be having serious words when you get home.. X

Reading his reply makes me shudder, at the mere thought of him putting the threat into action.

Once I'm inside I begin my shift sanitising the bar area, before moving swiftly on to clearing tables. Keeping my mind busy and active is the best way forward.

What I don't bank on seeing, when I look up from the mahogany table I'm wiping, is Jacob stalking towards me with a face like thunder, parting the crowds of people as if they were the Red Sea. A l quick glimpse of his stony glare reveals instantly to me that he knows what I've done. I have no idea how, but he does, and he's clearly pissed, heading straight for me.

I retreat hastily, giving him my back and scurry back over to the bar. Seconds before I can relish in the safety behind the hinged door, he traps me. His fingers shackle my wrist, dragging me towards him and spinning me on the spot so we're face to face.

"Time to stop running from me, Kitty. "

The way Jacob speaks in such a demanding and authoritative manner sends shivers down my spine, every time, without fail. Inclining his head, he closes the gap between us, in one clever inconspicuous motion. He seems rather apt at doing things without me noticing, or maybe I'm a bit oblivious to his motives.

Jacob slips his index finger under my chin, using it to gently lever my head until the point where I'm forced into eye contact with him. His eyebrows furrow together and his eyes narrow in on me, accusatory in their gaze.

I tear my gaze from him to stare down at the floor.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I counter hopelessly.

Jacob reaches out to grasp my chin, firmly, encouraging me to look at him again.

"Yes you damn well do!" He fumes, raising his voice to an unacceptable level, "and I want to know! Now. What in the hell possessed you to do something so stupid?!"

My eyes narrow of their own accord at his abrupt bluntness. Sure it may be true, but it's still damn harsh. With my patience wearing thin, the sudden need to flee from this dispute becomes apparent. I lay my palms flat against Jacobs chest, momentarily distracted by the solid muscles I know are beneath his shirt. Inhaling a deep breath, I push him in the opposite direction with as much force as I can muster. Unfortunately due to my own muscles rather lacking definition of any kind, he doesn't hurtle backwards as I imagined, but stumbles enough to get him out of my face for the time being.

"I don't need to tell you anything!" I contest, scoffing unattractively.

I watch his eyes turn to angry slits, and a frustrated scowl takes over his features. It's blatantly obvious that he's furious. I don't think I've ever seen him in a rage quite like this before.

"Yes you do Kitty! I want to know exactly what convinced you it would be a good idea to try and commit suicide!"

That word captures my attention in an instant, as well as many other onlookers in the close vicinity. Jessica freezes, mid way pouring a cocktail, her pretty eyes becoming round from shock.

My eyes dart back to lock with Jacobs steel gaze, which has softened a little from the fierce glare he pinned me with before. It's a struggle to control my hand, as it takes on a life of its own positioned incredibly close to his pretty face. Jacob eyes it up, looking a little sheepish, having probably just realised how out of order he had been by blurting my personal information.

"How dare you," I finally manage to spit.

Somehow I restrain myself from spewing the many other insults and profanities that hang from my lips, "I hate you Jacob Wilde."

Jacobs eyes widen like a scolded puppy, "Kitty, you don't understand-"

"No you don't understand," I interject quickly, angry tears threatening to fall at any second, "why can't you just leave me alone!"

A growl emits deep within Jacob's throat, and his expression reverts back to the scowl that seems to permanently adorn his irritating face. If I didn't know any better I'd presume that smirking and scowling were the only two expressions Jacob was capable of showing. That was the case whenever I was nearby anyway.

"Your brother called me early this morning," he explains, sounding remarkably calm considering the situation, "wanted to know if I had any idea why you would attempt to take your own life. Only of course I had no idea what was wrong with you because you bolted from my house without a word!"

I gulp down the uncomfortable lump in my throat, feeling utterly overwhelmed with guilt once again. My feet remain rooted to the spot, despite how much I urge them to shift in the opposite direction. Even when Jessica places a caring arm over my shoulder to try and steer me from the crowds.

"I think you need to leave."

My eyes remain glued to the floor, but In the back of my mind I recognise Ivan's tone barking orders close by. Jacob agrees to leave, after much protesting on his part.

"We're not done here Kitty" he informs me gruffly. I glance up as Jacobs dragged from the building by two burly bouncers, "I'll be waiting outside once you finish your shift."

And with that, he ceases his belligerent behaviour and turns to take his leave, with the same two bouncers in tow close by. Tears stream down my cheeks the second I've seen the front door slam. I can't hold it in anymore, everything has just become too much for me. Jessica holds me for a long while, allowing me to cry on her shoulder.

"Kitty. It's ok, everything is going to be alright. Don't worry," Jessica coos in my ear.

Jessica's reassurance does nothing to calm me. I know by the sullen expression on Ivan's face that everything isn't going to be alright. Not at all.

Jacob-

A long while passes and I almost give up hope, when I spot kitty strutting towards the car park, with her head hung low to her chest. Chewing anxiously on my bottom lip, I watch her solemn expression shift to one of utter resentment the second she catches my eye.

I stand up straight to appear taller as she approaches, taking careful steps away from the bonnet of her little car. Kitty scowls at me, practically dive bombing me in the middle of the street. Flailing around, she tries her best to claw at my eyes with her long manicured fingernails. But honestly, my concern lies with the miniature penknife attached to her keys that's dangling uncomfortably close to my face.

"Kitty-" I grumble in exasperation, easily pinning her arms to her side to avoid her doing harm to me or herself, "What the-"

"I hope you're happy Asshole!" She screeches, backing away from my grasp awkwardly. I stare at her dumbfounded, waiting for an explanation, "you got me fired!"

"Kitty, I'm sorry, I truly am," I breathe heavily trying to process the information, "but you really need to help me out here. I need answers. Talk to me."

Kitty scoffs loudly.

"You're not sorry!" She throws back with malice, getting up in my face again. I can't help that I steal a glance of her full breasts, which in all fairness to me are being shoved in my face. Not that I'm complaining of course.

"You don't give a shit what happens as long as everything goes in your favour!"

"I know your angry Kitty, but how would losing you be in my favour exactly?" I snap back, a little more aggressive than I had intended it to sound, "everything I've done for a while now has been for your benefit, to make you happy and protect you," I try my best to convey to her but she's having none of it.

Now she's in close proximity, the unquestionable scent of vodka wafting from her pretty lips almost floors me. How had I not noticed it before?

"Have you been drinking?" I question deliriously, though I already know the answer.

"Maybe," she replies simply, crossing her arms over her chest like the stubborn mare she is.

My eyebrows raise skyward when I drop my face closer to her.

"Keys, please," I order holding my outstretched hand a few inches below her chin.

Her pupils flicker to view my empty hand, but return to my face immediately. Her eyes narrow again to slits, glaring at me hard.

"Now," I reiterate, allowing a slightly more authoritative tone to materialise through my voice.

It has the desired effect. Holding direct eye contact, she slams the ring of keys down into my palm, then swiftly turns full circle to jump in the passenger seat. But not before slamming the door with enough gusto to wake the entire neighbourhood. At least it's not my car this time.

Sighing heavily I climb in to the drivers side, not surprised by the lack of space. My knees nearly touch the steering wheel, and my head is ridiculously close to the roof. In comparison to the Jag, her car is minuscule and has a good fifteen years or so on top of my car.

Kitty (now resting her feet carelessly on the dashboard) eyes me up briefly, an intriguing look across her features. The shape of her long legs leading down to where her ass curves perfectly against the seat proves as a major distraction. I mentally shake myself and belt up.

Straight away I make the mistake of not pressing the clutch down to the floor. The car lurches forward in protest, causing an amused grunt to escape from its owner next to me.

"I thought you were meant to be the safer driver out of us," she spits, sarcasm dripping from her lips.

I cough to clear my throat, ignoring her snide remark. This time, when I start the car, it's a success and the engine hums back happily. I turn to stick my tongue out at her. Childish I know.

"It's been a long time since I've driven stick, Kitten, or a car of this size for that matter. You'll have to forgive me if its a bit of a bumpy ride."

Beside me, Kitty throws her chin into the air obstinately and shifts to glare out of the cloudy window. My fingers tighten around the steering wheel in frustration, but I don't give her the reaction she wants. The drive back to the other end of town seems elongated, as the silence stretches between us.

In attempt to calm the atmosphere a little I switch on the car stereo. A very familiar 90's tune begins and at the risk of making a complete fool of myself I start singing.

"Oh baby baby, how was I supposed to know, that something wasn't right here,"  I belt out, catching Kitty eyeing me up through the corner of her vision.

"Oh baby baby, I shouldn't have let you go-" I sing adding in hand gestures, indicating that I am totally into this track, "when I'm not with you I lose my mind-"

"Why do you know the lyrics to Britney Spears?" Kittty questions interrupting my serenading.

I throw her a look over my shoulder, one eyebrow raised in sarcasm.

"I can't like 90's cheese?" I ask with a big grin, "It's your playlist, sweetie," I add before continuing my performance. Kitty rolls her eyes returning to her position, but this time she's isnt angled quite as far away from me.

"Hit me, baby, one more time!"

"I'll hit you one more time," she mutters under her breath loud enough for me to hear.

I chuckle to myself, revelling in the half smile that forms on her lips. She's trying her best to mask it but I know it's there.
That was a success and was much better than us entering into another slanging match.

I figure in my head, it's best to take her back to her house. If I'm going to get her to confide in me, and I was adamant that tonight I would, she'd probably be more at ease in her own environment.

So when I pull up outside her house, relief floods her heart face and she legs it from the car to the front door. Shockingly she doesn't slam the door in my face and lock me out, so I cautiously step inside and kick off my shoes.

The realisation hits me that it's the first time I've been in Kitty's house since I followed her home from school that fateful day. The atmosphere feels rather different to back then, and the furniture and decor appear tired and worn. It's an unusual contrast to my own residence, and one that makes me feel strangely uncomfortable.

I perch myself directly opposite kitty at the dining table, clasping my hands together. A heavy sigh escapes my lips before I make eye contact with her.

"So. You wanna tell me what's going on?"

Kitty-

"No," I answer immediately, giving him a one worded answer that I know will irritate him. I'm not sure why, but provoking Jacob and getting him wound up gives me a thrill like no other.

"Do you realise why I'm so angry with you?" He questions, his tone altogether darkening.

"How could I? You don't tell me anything! Look. I just want to be alone. Please," I add desperately, just wanting this to end.

"Sorry, but I'm not going home. Not until we talk about this, " he replies stubbornly, before continuing, "The reason I'm so upset, Kitty...is because my best friend committed suicide. She jumped from a multi-storey car park. "

I stare at him in bewilderment, my lips wavering until I can eventually form words, "I'm sorry."

"And you know why she did it Kitty. It was because of a man. And I vowed from that very day that I wouldn't allow it to happen to anyone else I cared about."

"Sure. But that has nothing to-"

"Don't you dare lie to me!" Jacob strikes the table hard with his hand startling me in the process. He groans and grabs at tufts of his own hair in pure frustration, "Tell me, Kitty. I can help you if you just tell me what's going on."

"I don't want to talk to you about this Jacob," I protest, crossing my arms like a child, "I can't believe Hunter even told you," I mutter, disbelief lacing my voice. Funnily enough the culprit is nowhere to be seen.

"It's a damn good job he did," Jacobs growling interrupts me, "your brother is worried about you, as am I. Kitty, he mentioned sending you away, to a specialist. So you better start talking if you don't want anything untoward to happen."

"I'm not going anywhere!" I screech back in outrage, my fingers curling into tight fists. How dare he even consider that!

"Sweetie, I don't think you realise the severity of what you did last night," he replies in a much more stern tone.

I shrug my shoulders, "It's not that serious." 

"Shrug at me again like that and I might have to slap you upside the face. You nearly died Kitty!"

"And sometimes that's the only escape," I counter, forcing my chair back. It scrapes against the kitchen tiles producing a horrible screeching sound. Just as I make an attempt to walk away, long fingers curl around the contours of my own hand. The warmth of Jacob's touch encourages me to sit back down.

"Escape from what?" He inquires gently, lowering his head so he can stare longingly up into my eyes.

I close my eyes tightly to block the memories that come flooding back thick and fast. Shaking my head, I mutter a few profanities under my breath.

"No, this is ridiculous," I argue, "I don't want to do this, Jacob."

"Come on Kitten. Tell me," he continues to push my boundaries, this time with a much deeper voice.

That's when I lose it, erupting like a volcano causing devastation to everything in its path. The chair topples over on the hard wood floor. I stare at my hands spread wide on the table. They shake furiously in trepidation and fear. Gritting my teeth together, I raise my head to brave meeting Jacobs eyes.

"What do you want me to tell you, Jacob?" I cry in a strangled voice, "That I was abused by the one man I thought loved me!" I stop to catch my breath. Tears fill my eyes, but I don't break eye contact with the boy in front of me, "He raped me multiple times Jacob! And drugged me. And violated me, mentally and physically, until I genuinely believed that I was worthless. Until-until-"

I never finished that sentence. Jacobs arms were around me in an instant, engulfing me in their comfort and warmth. He whispers in my ear, tickling my skin with his soft breath, trying to calm my uncontrollable tears.

"Kitty. Shhh, it's ok," he coos holding me close to his chest, "It's going to be ok now."

I peel myself from his embrace, noticing that I've left a small patch of watery mascara on his white shirt. All I can say is If you decide to wear white in the vicinity of a hormonal woman you're not the brightest crayon in the box.

I peer at Jacob, my eyes full to the brim with salty tears. He meets my gaze, with a boatload of his own concern and brushes a couple of unruly strands of hair from my face, tucking them neatly behind my right ear.

"I'm so afraid," I admit, with great reluctance, "It's not ok. Nothing ever is."

Jacob only grunts in response, pulling me back to nestle in his arms. Being so close to him gives me a great sense of security. I know I'm safe with Jacob at my side, as weird as that would have sounded a few short weeks ago.

"It's ok now, Kitty," He repeats assuredly, a little louder this time, in hopes that I'll believe him the second time around, "I won't let anyone hurt you anymore. I promise."

As I raise my head to search his face I see the sheer determination behind his eyes, and I can't help but give him a watery smile. Of course he returns it with a cracking toothy grin of his own.

Filled with a massive sense of relief from being able to tell my secret to another person, I can't believe moments ago I had been so ready to run a mile when Jacob propositioned me. I had no idea how he would react, what he would think of me or if he'd even believe me.

One thing I did truly believe though, without a doubt, is that Jacob Wilde will do everything in his power to keep his promise to me.