So.... I have giant gash in my leg now...

IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I SWEAR!

I was cutting an apple on my lap and I was wearing really short shorts that exposed my  turkey legs hoomans call thighs. (What even was this sentence?) I was cutting and apple and it wouldn't cut. So I grabbed a butcher knife and it still wouldn't even slice. Logic was asleep apparently and I decided it was a smart idea to smash the knife in the apple. It went through to my thigh and now I have stitches. I chose black and red cus I know from experience that they look the creepiest.

So yea. I'm not smart. At least I get a cool bandage now 😁