I got into a bit of trouble with my, I guess, boyfriend. It's gotten to the point where I can seriously think of him that way, I think. I don't know how any of this relationship business works. The reason I can sort of pick this apart is the way he reacted when I teased him, about us both, kind of saying hello and leaving it at that repeatedly throughout the day.

I don't think it's funny that he thinks of me! I can't get this guy out of my head either, even when I'm working my butt off. He does a lot of physical labor, and I do a lot of mental labor. It takes a lot out of both of us.

Anyway, I said I was sorry. I didn't mean it that way. But I'm kind of glad this happened because it made me realize that he thinks of me seriously. It's a little bit scary, but mostly exciting. I set up a whole dating profile, but I never actually expected anything serious to come from it.

Normally I would start talking to someone, and I want to say a week later, they would stop talking to me after I sent pictures of myself. It's been months, which is quite surreal to me. Especially because I've never actually heard this guy speak.

He's heard me, through my audios. He's seen more of me than I have ever shared with anyone. I'm thinking about what rent looks like up there for fucks sake. I've said that I'm willing to relocate, but I didn't say I was able. Not at the moment anyway.

I need to hear his voice. I'm so awkward over the phone though. I didn't expect to ever get this far with someone. Fuck me. I need to get this guy a nice necklace. We need to have a serious conversation.