Hi! :)

The song is Dreamlover by Mariah Carey. Banner by Fallingleaves18

Thank you for reading my story ♥

*****

"Aren't you wondering why you're still alive?"

"I've thought about that."

"It's because God has a plan for you," Alex says, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

I can't help but scoff. "Yeah, right." He wants me to have a horrible life. Hooray!

Alex stares at me like he's seeing me for the first time.

"What?" I say uneasily.

"Did something happen to you before?" he asks gently. "To not make you believe?"

I tear my eyes away from him, afraid that he can read my morbid past just by looking at me. I used to believe in God. Before. When I was a kid. I even prayed but when I realized it will give me nothing, I stopped.

At that, another memory from the past resurfaces from my mind.

"Children, don't forget to pray before you sleep," Sister Madeleine reminds us.

"We always pray at night," Alex replies smoothly.

Sister Madeleine smiles affectionately at Alex before turning the lights off.

And then complete darkness consumes us. I lay on my bed and I'm about to pray when someone nudges me on my elbow.

"What?" I whisper. I can't see anything, and it's so quite, I'm afraid there's a ghost beside me.

"It's me," Alex whispers.

"What do you want?"

"Have you talked to God already?" he asks.

"Not yet."

"Let's do it together," he suggests.

"Okay," I agree.

He guides me as we both kneel at the edge of my bed. It's not always when Alex wants to pray with me, especially when the other kids play boy games so I am excluded. I grab this chance to be with him. Clasping my hands together, I wait for him to take the lead.

"Hello, God," he starts, "I am Alex, and beside me is the most important person to me. Her name is Alyson."

"Hi, Daddy God," I whisper shyly.

"God, thank you for this day," Alex continues. "I had a great time playing with my friends. Thank you for giving me ice cream for dessert." He nudges me, a sign that it's my turn.

"God, thank you for giving Alex as my friend," I say. "And thank you for the food we ate today."

"God, I'm sorry I pushed Tommy earlier," Alex whispers. "He started it! He was annoying, and he irritated Alyson so I had to stop him. I didn't want my playmates to tease Alyson just because she has a birthmark. God, that's bad, right? So. . . please forgive me. And I'm sorry I got another extra cookie on the pantry even though Sister Agatha said not to. I'm sorry, God."

Alex had a fight with Tommy earlier? And he ate an extra cookie? I did not know that. "God, please forgive Alex. He was just trying to protect me from those evil kids. Oops, sorry, God, I did not mean to say that they're evil." Alex chuckles softly and I giggle. "I'm sorry I cut the hair of Jelly's doll. I did it because she stole Marie's favorite toy. Sorry, God, I won't do it again."

"God, please make the sisters bake delicious treats for us tomorrow," Alex says.

"Ice cream, too," I add.

"God, please give our parents back to us," Alex says, his voice cracking at the end. "I want to have a mommy and a daddy. But if ever that happens, can you make Alyson go with us? I don't want to leave her here. Thank you, God. Amen."

I pray quietly that nothing will ever separate Alex and me. And then I say, "Amen."

"Annalise? Earth to Annalise?!"

"What?" I ask, a little too sharply. My head throbs as I realize I've been stuck in my childhood memories for the past couple of minutes.

"We were talking, and then you suddenly stopped and stared off into space," he says. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I say, "I just remembered something. What were you saying?" I noticed I've been rude to him.

"I said that everything happens for a reason," Alex says. "We might not understand them but keep in mind that they're for the best."

"Really?" I say sarcastically. I have to think before I speak. But I don't like the topic of our conversation.

God planned for me to be alone. He wanted my parents to leave me in an orphanage. He didn't love me because he even took Alex away from me.

"Annalise." Alex leans to me and takes my hand. "I'm here if you want to talk." He squeezes my hand.

I'm touched by the gesture but unfortunately, I can't tell him about my past. I can't and I don't want to. He'll just look at me with pity. And there are secrets that are better to be buried. They might spill and reeked.

The ringing of the bell makes Alex let go of my hand. I breathe a sigh of relief. I don't have to respond to Alex anymore.

My next classes passed by in a blur, and I don't remember anything from the discussions. I really need to pay attention if I don't want to fail. If it's that easy studying my notes like reading fictional books, I bet I'll perfect my exam.

I'm on my way to the gym, dragging my feet to the locker room to change my clothes. When I'm done, I head to where my classmates are.

"You're late," Kamille says.

Rolling my eyes, I reply, "I'm not. You're  just early."

"Well, Lise—"

"Class!" Mr. Asher says, cutting Kamille's sentence.

I'm glad because I don't like the way she started it. Lise.

"The boys will play this week," Mr. Asher explains, "while the girls will watch how they play. Next week, it's your turn."

There are complaints from the boys while exicted chatter from the girls.

That's in my favor. I still remember a few weeks ago when the ball landed on my face. Fortunately we didn't have PE for two consecutive weeks because 1.) We had no classes on Thursday, and 2.) Coach was not around last week.

I'm glad the bruise is non existent anymore. I'm sure Meagan did that on purpose. That witch.

Kamille grabs my arm and we both sit on the bleachers, watching Mr. Asher teach the guys what they have to do. Alex and Caleb are still not here. I wonder where—

 "What do we have here?" Coach says, interrupting me from my thoughts.

And then I look to where my classmates are staring. There they are, Alex and Caleb, coming inside the gym.

 "Ah, the Vandom brothers!" Coach continues. "We're grateful you shower us with your presence."

My classmates laugh, amused at Mr. Asher's sense of humour.

Alex tries to capture my gaze but I'm still uncomfortable with our conversation earlier.

Caleb looks around, like he's searching for someone, until he spots me. With the way his whole face lights up when he sees me, you'd think that there's something going on between us.

And then Coach ruins the moment by scowling and demanding, "What are you waiting for? Come here!"

Alex and Caleb walks reluctantly to where the boys are standing.

"Because you two are late," Coach says, "You'll be the captains of separate team."

After they chose their teammates, the game starts. Both of them are really good players. They're like twins, that even before Caleb hits the ball, Alex already knows where it will land. Same when Alex has the ball.

"Such a heated game," Kamile comments.

"Yeah," I affirm, as I notice that all my classmates and the other students are watching the game. I don't even know if they're blinking.

There are shouts and cheers from them. They're already betting on their favorite team.

I'm not interested with volleyball although Alex and Caleb are the ones playing. Instead, I decide to imagine Daniel while I have free time.

In my make-up world, I create an enchanted place. The grass is green and soft to the touch. Flowers are scattered everywhere; their fragrance penetrates the air. There are trees with wide trunks and branches. It's a perfect place to have a picnic, especially when the sun is hiding behind the clouds. The air is not too warm, or too cold. Birds are chirping wonderful melodies and butterflies are fluttering their wings as they fly.

Daniel places two blankets beside a big oak tree. On the first blanket, he arranges the basket full of sandwiches, cookies, cakes, and sodas he prepared. Then he settles and lies comfortably on the other blanket. When he sees me standing awkwardly, he smiles and pats the space next to him.

Walking slowly, I wish my nerves will calm down. I'm just going to sit beside a guy! Well, not just any other guy. It's Daniel- the man of my dreams.

"Annalise?"

The breeze blows my hair and I tuck the lock of it behind my ear. "Yes?" I say, sitting beside him.

"Can I read the continuation of your story now?" he asks.

"Sure, but it's not yet done."

"It's okay," he says, smiling. "It's worth the wait."

"Thanks," I say, and give him my notebook.

He reads the continuation of the story where he stopped the last time. "Adam stares at Alyson and Clay the whole time they're eating. Meanwhile, he has not even touched his food yet." Daniel pauses reading and gives me a knowing look. "I think I'm right. Adam is jealous!"

"Eh, you're not even done," I say.

He shrugs. "That's just my theory." And then he continues, "Adam is disappointed with himself. He realized he let go of his best friend just like that. He was busy  picking stones he didn't notice the diamond fell from his grasp. If only he can hear what they're talking about."

Daniel frowns. "I feel bad for Adam."

"Why?" I ask, glancing at him through the corner of my eye.

"I think he'll get hurt in the end," he says thoughtfully.

I decide not to reply, and instead take a bite of the chicken sandwich he made.

Daniel resumes reading, "Alyson is listening intently to whatever Clay is saying. Adam doesn't like the way Clay looks at Alyson. His fingers start to throb and when he looks down to inspect them, he sees that his hands are clenched into fists. Startled, he relaxes them quickly, letting the blood flow again." Daniel smiles slowly and says, "I'll wait patiently for the next scenes."

"Thanks," I say gratefully.

We are both quiet for the next few minutes, but it's comfortable. How nice is that, not having to talk to fill the void of silence.

"Annalise?"

"Yes?"

Why does my heart wants to rip its way out of my chest? It's beating wildly, I feel hyperventilating. This is just my imagination, right? Why do I have mixed emotions?

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

My eyes almost pop out of their sockets. I'm sure my heart leaps to my throat because I can't find my voice. Finally, I say, "Absolutely!"

Call me crazy, but I'm so happy. It's like what's happening in my make-up world is real! I'm not single anymore! Daniel Perkins is my boyfriend! I can't wipe the smile off my face.

But wait.

What if in real life, people will ask if I have a boyfriend? What would I answer them? Yes, I have— in my imagination, or No, I'm single and looking for a partner?

The snapping of fingers brings me back to reality. Blinking my eyes to clear my thoughts, I find Caleb sitting on my other side.

Does that mean the game already ended? But some of my classmates are still playing. So what is Caleb doing here?

I haven't met his mom yet. No matter how many times we reschedule, there's always something coming up. Like, she's not home, or I need to do an errand for Margarett, and other reasons. On the other hand, Caleb is not telling me about his father. I don't want to ask him because he might think I'm prying into their lives.

"You're daydreaming again," he says amusedly. "I've been staring and waiting for you to come back from your little world."

"Sorry," I say sheepishly.

Really, Annalise, just imagine when you're alone.

Sometimes I think there's a glitch in my brain. I'm so different from the ordinary. Not that it's bad. But I think it's the reason why I don't belong.

To my surprise, Caleb puts his arm around my shoulder. "That's okay," he says. "I'm used to it." And then he smiles at me, and I'm mesmerized with his green eyes.

Caleb is so easy to be with. He is very friendly, that's why a lot of people want to be around him. His teasing remarks? They're funny, not annoying. And his smile? So contagious. I can effortlessly smile when I'm with him.

Wait!

Why am I listing Caleb's good qualities? Don't tell me. . .

No, no, no.

I don't. . .

I can't think like that. I have a boyfriend.

A haunting thought suddenly comes to my mind. Since I started daydreaming about Daniel, I remember bits of the past. And of course, when the Vandom brothers came, it's like visiting my memories when I was young.

Is this a coincidence or. . . ?

Yeah, it's just nothing.