"I hate this fucking family."

"You know you're lying to yourself, Izuku."

"I'm questioning that. My confused relationship with you has led me to become covered in dirt and bruises and germs. Like, I only inflicted myself once. Compared to you, I look like a wimp."

"What about Hizashi and Nemuri?"

"I'm not related to them. You need to man the fuck up to get Hizashi in the family. Meanwhile, Nemuri is screwed out of that unless she marries my mom or something. Or me, but I won't go there yet. I'm only bound legally to you and my mom."

"I don't want to talk about this."

Welp, if that doesn't explain how the training session went, so I will give you a straightforward answer.

Hell.

Yes, I got better. It doesn't mean Shouta was going easy on me. I think he was letting his anger out on me. Like, I understand I'm aggravating, but come on! HAVE SOME SYMPATHY! YOU CHOSE ME! I guess let's get back to training.

"We're moving on to something else. Come on, brat." Shouta tells me as we head out.

"Tech-sass, Eraserhead." Well, we appear in a gym with targets, and my only guess is long-range practice, " We working on the range?"

"Yes. I noticed at the Sludge Incident that you threw a knife. I want to test your ability with long-range weapons in general."

"Oh yeah, the memories! The day I told All Might he can go fuck himself basically, and I saved my childhood bully!" Shouta shakes his head as he moves to grab a box, bringing it over and setting it on the floor. He pops off the lid to reveal some nicely organized knives and kunais, multiple of each style.

"We are going to start with regular knives and move to the kunais. You need to test with both hands." He hands me a regular large kitchen knife, the one most similar to what I carry around.

Call it an unhealthy habit, but I have way too much experience with throwing knives. I wanted to be able to defend myself!

It takes me about a minute to adjust to each knife, but I can aim successfully with both hands by hitting the target, always closest to the center. I forced myself to work with both. I want the least amount of weaknesses as possible, even as a kid. I bet everyone forgot I'm actually smart. By the time I got to the kunais, I was bored.

"Impressive. Now." Shouta left a while ago to grab something, and he opens that new box, revealing a fucking pistol, " Try this."

"Are you allowed to give a psychotic kid a gun?"

"Yes. The government hasn't proven that you're insane yet somehow."

"Thanks for the confidence," I tell Shouta sarcastically, moving to grab the gun. I take a moment to adjust before aiming it at the target and shooting, but I miss terribly. How the hell can I hit with a knife but not a gun? I take a deep breath. I take note of how I'm fidgeting as I aim the gun and shoot. Better, but not there.

"One more bullet," Shouta warns me. I try to focus by forcing myself still. Once again, I shoot. It hits the very bottom of the target, "That's interesting... I want to try something." He carefully takes the gun and guides me to the bleachers, " Sit down and stay still as long as possible." I do as he asks. I start trembling and fidgeting at five seconds, but I manage to stay in the same position.

Internally, I'm frantic because I have something to focus on, at least. It's like a blanket trying to smother me if I attempt to stay still. Pathetic, I know. I really am a puppy.

"Izuku. You're good." I quickly hop up, shaking the blanket off, " That could be a weakness for you to be unable to stay still, especially underground." For those who need an explanation, those underground, especially Shouta, rely on surprise attacks. Those require being still.

Who can't be still?

This pussy!

"Isn't there like something you could put in my hand like a ball or something that could stop that?" I ask. It's more of a curious question.

"A fidget item? Yeah, but it would have to be very specific for you," I nod, " Let's go eat and take a nap."

"I don't want to nap, Eraserhead! I want a shower!"

"After you take a shower, I'll probably send you with Hizashi to keep you busy then. You're both going to stay in the teacher's lounge while I stay in my office."

"I'll take it!"

"And no causing trouble. No pranks or nothing. Just chat or work on something like normal people."

"Wasn't planning on it, but okay."

---

"Dadzashi!"

"Zuku!" Hizashi and I run towards each other and hug tightly. He lifts me up and spins me around, causing me to laugh before he puts me down," How's your internship going?" He asks as he leads us to the couch, us sitting on each side.

"Hell. I think Eraserhead is using me as a punching bag. Oh, and I learned I can throw knives, but I can't shoot a gun nor stand still."

"That's kind of obvious. You're fidgeting right now, kid."

"Thanks, Captain Obvious."

"You're welcome!"

". . ."

". . ."

"I'm done." I get up. Nope nope nopety nope.

"Izuku, get back here!"

"Nope." I head towards the door when I feel arms wrap around my waist. Now, what's the logical thing to do?

"YOU'RE NOT MY DAD!" I may or may not have screamed, and I may or may not have tried to kick Hizashi in the balls. Too bad he let go at the right moment and grabbed me again to tackle me on the ground and pinned me. Like, you would believe he isn't a good fighter, but he knows some tricks. Believe it or not, for his Pokemon stats, he has an A in intelligence (we are talking the original, not the updated). He has to know something for that grade.

"Izuku!"

"I don't know what you expect!" Too bad, I have no self-preservation. I start managing to slide from him, even with his weight on top of me. I can hear the pops, oh gawd.

"Kid, stop! You're going to hurt yourself!"

Like I listen. I use my legs to twist back and forth, biting my tongue as I manage to force Hizashi off, allowing me a moment to sit up and get him on the ground with me on top, shaky from the force. At least he settles down.

"You okay?!" Hizashi asks worriedly.

"I'm fine. Don't try that again."

"That was reckless. I can say I'm impressed you got out of it with your height but stupid. Now, let me up, and let's go back to the couch and cuddle because you're spending way too much time with Shouta if you go straight for violence." I do let him up, helping him on his feet as we head back to the couch.

"That's just how we roll."

"A fucking terrible way to roll."

"It works."

"Barely. What is Shouta doing anyway now that I think about it?"

"Napping. I'm not willing, obviously."

"He needs it. You probably do too."

"Why?"

"You would have been quicker. Your speed is supposed to be faster than mine, and we matched there." For anyone curious, Hizashi's speed stat is a D while mine is a C.

"I still have energy, though!" I stand up to bounce on my toes, something I do if I'm standing still.

"You're like me in that sense except in a much more extreme case. You have energy that keeps you awake, except you need sleep. Even after trying to expend most of it, you still can stay awake for hours on end. How much sleep did you get last night?"

"About an hour. I sleep an average of three hours every night." More like two but three sounds slightly better. And most of the time, I skip.

"Have you been tested to see how it affects you?"

"It doesn't affect me as long as I take naps sometimes. I mean, I got out of jail while drunk. If I can do that, I think it will take a while to start having problems."

"Not healthy."

"Says the man with three jobs."

"I am an adult, and you are still a child. I don't need you falling on your feet like I did because I did the same thing. Overactive. I was able to settle over the years with medication, but I learned I need to sleep. You need that too, kid. I have to have at least four, but you're still growing. I say about six because you're still growing. Maybe that's why you're so short." Damn, since when did this turn into Hizashi scolding me. Yeah, I'm not saying shit towards that final fact.

"Dadzashi."

"Kid, I will force nappy time on you."

"What happens if I resist a rest (arrest)?" Kill me.

"Oh. My. God. There is something wrong if you are making puns."

"God said the same thing when he created me!"

"Oh boy, I will let you cuddle with me if you take a nap." He would make me cuddle with him anyway.

"No cuddles! Also, inappropriate at school." I cross my arms, getting huffy like a little child.

"Recovery Girl would approve."

"She hates me."

"She does not hate you. She cares for you strongly like every other student."

"I think hurting myself with an invention kind of ruined that."

"What?"

"Nothing!"

"I will find that out later. Hmm...I will take Shouta and you out to eat if you sleep." OH HO HO! A WAY TO SET UP A DATE FOR THEM!

"Okay!"

"Wait, really?"

"Yip!"

"Fine, come here." Hizashi ends up grabbing my wrist, pulling me on the couch with me laying on top of him as he strokes my fluffy green curls.

I knock out quickly.

---

I wake up to the lounge door opening. Who knows how much time will pass, but I remain still and keep my breathing even. Might as well stalk. Going to be a bitch to stay, though. I feel Hizashi below me with his arms around my waist to keep me from falling off.

Weird relationship. Anyway!

"He went to sleep. Good, he needs every bit he can get." Shouta says softly. So he is here to pick me up for more beat up sessions? Great.

"He does. You know he only slept an hour last night?" Hizashi responds, still stroking my hair gently. Probably trying to get me to stay asleep. Fuck you, I'm already awake!

"Yes, and he only went to sleep when I got home, and I know he struggled then because I heard him shifting through the wall." Damn.

"So, he goes to sleep when you go to sleep except for fewer naps?" That's creepy to think about. I won't deny it.

"Never thought of that, but yes."

"What about on your free days?"

"On the weekend when Izuku is with his mom. I don't know what happens then." I spend time with Mom for the majority of the day. Then I suddenly get inspiration for a new project, so I work on that all night.

"You think he has some anxiety still from what happened at the USJ?" Anxiety? Like I know what that is!

"Izuku doesn't realize it, but yes. He had zoned out during our training. It doesn't help that he cut himself to catch me off guard."

"I think it's the other way around, too, Shouta." The other way around? Oh...wait, what?

"After seeing him do that, can you blame me?"

"No, but whether you two admit or not, you two are closer than you and I. I can see you two being partners in the future." I deny that.

"If he can keep up, maybe." Wait, really?!

"You two would be unstoppable at that point. For now, worry about getting sleep. Both of you. Zuku is following your example. Father and son duo. Or the brother duo? I'm thinking more of the brother duo." I'm done with life. Wake me up already!

"Yeah yeah, wake him up." I have a feeling regret is going to happen.

"IZUKU, WAKE UP!" Hizashi used his fucking quirk! I sit up quickly, punching him in the stomach harshly to cut him off as I fall off the couch.

"YOU MOTHER-FUCKER!"

"Both of you settle down, and Izuku stop cursing!" Shouta growls.

"Tech-sass, but yes Eraserhead!" Hizashi bursts out laughing at that comment. I feel scarves wrap around me, dragging me next to him.

"Brat. Back to training, then tonight we are going to visit Iida's brother in the hospital." Shouta tells us.

"Can I go too!?" Hizashi asks.

"Yes, both you and Nemuri can go. But you have to stay out of trouble, especially with Izuku going as well."

"Yes, you will get along great with him, Zuku!" When was that a nickname?

"As long as he ain't stiff like Iida, we will be fine. Why are we visiting?"

"Why do you think?" Shouta asks.

"Stain? You're on the Stain case?" The only idea I can come up with.

"Yes, that's why I told you to pack a bag as well. We're staying in Hosu." I thought it was to deport me, but I can accept that.

"Why are we still here, then?"

"I needed to test your abilities. That happens to be something I can work with. Better than I thought. I need to work more on your close-combat skills."

"I assume you're forcing Hizashi and Nemuri back on the train?"

"Yes. I'm only willing to deal with one of you at a time."

"Harsh." Both Hizashi and I respond.

"Whatever, let's go." Shouta drags me out for our 'beat the green boi up session.'

---

"You learn fast," Shouta states.

"I would fucking hope so with my grades." I can't help but snark back.

"Don't start. We're together for a week without anyone blocking us so shush."

"Someone has an attitude problem."

"Whatever. Get your stuff and let's head to the station."

I think I'm much better now because I'm not dead yet. Now it's just a beat-up session, and not just a beat me up session! Yeah, that can be looked at in more than one way. Anyway, it's time to head to Hosu. We are at the train station with our shit waiting for Nemuri and Hizashi. I got the low-down from Shouta. Apparently, they all went to UA together, so it's a meet-up/investigation mission. I'm surprised he is letting the whole squad go.

Eh, he will regret that in a few minutes.

Rephrase, a fucking second.

"WE ARE HERE!" We look up to see Hizashi and Nemuri in civilian clothing walking over. Hizashi is wearing his hair in a half-up half-down style(looks fantastic) with black shoes, simple blue jeans, and a white t-shirt with a black jacket unzipped. He as regular glasses on too! Did you know that his tinted-orange glasses are prescription?

Yes, why? I don't know.

Nemuri has her hair up in a pony-tail wearing a black office outfit and heels, looking like a normal woman instead of a stripper.

"You two quiet down. Even Izuku is staying out of trouble." Um, what? Shouta, that's a bit of a far statement.

"That's kind of a disappointment when I'm the most active one here." It happens to show because I'm bouncing on my toes again. I don't even feel pain from it anymore. My hands still twitch sometimes, so I have to rub them together. Stupid tics. Realizing now, I never talked about them. I guess they slipped my mind till this point. They are more obvious now. Oh, and remember those tics because they become important later. Anyway, Bakugo used to tease me all the time for it, and that's how he earned himself a broken nose.

Not controllable, honey. Unlike your goddamn explosions.

Nemuri quickly pulls me into a hug before pulling back and ruffling my hair," How you doing, kid?"

"I'm good! It's not 'beat up the green' session anymore! It's 'let's beat each other up' session now!" She chuckles, shaking her head.

"Sho being rough on you?"

"I ain't a pussy."

"Izuku, no cursing in public." Shouta always ruining the moment, " Let's go. I'll be blaming you two if we miss the train."

"We ain't that late, though!" Hizashi tries to rebut.

"Whatever, let's go. Keep up." Shouta walks off, and I quickly catch up beside him while Hizashi and Nemuri stay behind us. Before I get on the train, I put on my gloves because those poles are nasty. When we get on the subway, we can share a single-pole, each of us taking a side because I can't sit still for damn. Thankfully, I'm short as fuck compared to the rest, so I only have to grab the bottom while the other three fight for space. Nemuri settles for the bottom while the boys keep their hands close. It's like, JUST HOLD HANDS ALREADY, DAMN IT! Thinking about it, it probably looks weird. I'm 5'3" (160.02 centimeters for everybody but Americans)(don't drink or smoke kids or you will be short!), Nemuri is 5'9"(175.26 centimeters), Shouta is 6' (183 centimeters), and Hizashi is 6'1"(185 centimeters).

Basically, it looks like a fucked up family!

"Hey, Nemy, think I can pole-dance on a moving subway?" I have to ask with a smirk. Obviously, that receives laughter from the rest of the children and a smack upside the head from the adult.

"At least try to act mature," Shouta mutters, shaking his head.

Now, we can't be on a subway without drama, can we?

Well, we can, God!

Does that happen?

Nope, it's drama time, bitches! Within only a couple minutes too!

We were all talking about the physics and subways when a guy sitting near us pulls on Nemuri's sleeve. Not in a sexual way, but to get her attention. Yes, that is important because of her body type.

"May I help you?" She asks, looking over the man. He looks like your classic businessman. He has a clean-shaven face, brown eyes, black hair, and a black suit with a blue tie. I mean, even the tie color is typical. He has his legs crossed with his right hand holding the suitcase in the seat next to him like the dipwad he is. Like, that's an asshole move. Somebody could be sitting in that seat instead of your goddamn suitcase! Anywho, continuing on, his left hand his still up from getting Nemy's attention. I see him looking at me.

"Yes, can you tell the green boy and yellow-haired man to settle down? They are both distracting everyone in the room." Damn, Iida, I found where you got your attitude from! Anyway, I can understand. I'm bouncing, and that is normal. Hizashi, on the other hand, is more minor. He is a little bit loud, but that's expected on a subway and from him. The problem is his hand gestures. He does that when he is telling a story. He does fidget like me too, but not as bad.

I spend way too much time with Nezu.

"Sorry, sir, I can stop! Did not mean to bother you!" Hizashi tells the man. I stop my bouncing, taking a deep breath. It does piss me off, but I'm trying. I'm not in the mood to fight. I grip that fucking pole like I'm about to start dancing on it.

"What about the kid? I expect an apology from him too, especially if he's in the hero course. He should know respect, and he needs a healthy dose of it. Maybe put him back in his place. A quirkless shouldn't be a hero, after all." That breaks me. I look up at him.

"I highly recommend you leave me alone. I made it through on my damn strength. A quirkless can be as powerful, if not, more powerful than someone with a quirk. What is your quirk?" I feel Shouta grab the back of my neck, pulling me close to him. Somehow, that calms me down a little.

Not fully. I will still be salty, but I won't attack. Yet. I will need to remember to attack my neck with bleach because of germs.

"I can read extremely quickly. Why would you need to know?"

"I already gained knowledge of your quirk. I can estimate that you can retain knowledge decently well, or else the quirk is useless. That is all the knowledge I need to take someone down. Based on your body type, you do work out, so you at least have some strength, but probably lacking in the speed department. Your suitcase could be used as a weapon; however, you would have to get a lucky hit against me. Even if you did, it would be hard to knock me out. Your endurance would wear you out before you get enough strength as you would be throwing it around erratically. Now, if you decided to go hand-to-hand, you have smooth hands, meaning you probably only do office work. I estimate a lack of experience, and I could use your weight to my advantage. We also have this pole here that I can swing myself around like a dancer because I do dance. Check my videos out if you don't believe me. (There are videos of me pole-dancing on Youtube. Not going to put those down though because I'm hot in those!)

If that analysis doesn't prove myself, I don't know what does. We have brains for a reason. Humans have become so reliant on their quirks that the moment their quirk is taken, their life tumbles. That is a risk I don't have to worry about. I just need my surroundings." I grin my psychotic grin before looking away, leaving the guy baffled, but I look up again.

"Oh, and I know you have a knife. A pocket knife it seems in your right pocket, showing you're right-handed. Too short-ranged to do anything." That leaves no room for a fight. The man lost.

You know, if it was the past, I would have gotten us kicked out for fighting him and winning. However, there are times when you don't need to beat the shit out of people. For Shouta and I, we get along by beating the shit out of each other. However, there are times when that doesn't work, so we awkwardly cuddle it out.

Yes, I can be fucking mature, bitches. I'm becoming a hero. I can't be flipping everyone off. I can only flip some people off without getting in trouble. I don't need to be Endeavor. Actually, we hella don't need an All Might either. Yes, Endeavor is fucking shit, but All Might could do more damage to society than him. We rely too much on him anyway.

That's a bomb for you! Back on topic, though!

I get caught off-guard when Shouta leans down, grabbing my attention as he whispers in my ear.

"I'm proud of you, kid."

When he stands up straight again, I look up in confusion to see him looking down at me with a smile, still keeping a grip on my neck though and keeping me close. First off,

WHY THE FUCK AM I SO DAMN SHORT!?

But that's a minor detail. When was the last time someone told me they were proud of me? Why over something so simple? For once in my little life, I'm left speechless. To give you an idea of how major this is, I'm always talking, but we all know that.

I didn't say a word for the rest of the ride. I was quiet, contemplating what he said to me. Maybe I'm overthinking this, but oh well!

Well, Shouta, I guess you deserve something.

Achievement Earned: Get Izuku To Shut Up For More Than Two Minutes Achievement!