Prompt: Describe a date between him and a girl (or boi or nonbinary folk). Anyone. And he isn't there against his will. - kei on Discord.
Thank you for this! It was certainly fun!

I told everyone in the Discord that the first person to give me a prompt I will do.
I gave myself 30 minutes to write this for a challenge. I hope you enjoy!

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GUESS WHO FINALLY GOT A DATE, YOU DAMN ASSHOLES!?

YES, IT'S YOUR BOY! GOD DAMN GERMAPHOBIC GENIUS BOY IZUKU MIDORIYA! IS IT ENTIRELY LEGAL?! FUCK NO, BUT WHO LIVES BY THE LAW WHEN YOU HAVE LOVE?!

So what do I mean by illegal? Well, she is out of the country. If you know me well enough, you probably already know who I am talking about. Not only is she out of the country, but she is in one of the most secure places in the world: I-Island.

If you have not come up with anything, you kind of suck. Don't worry: I am revealing her now!

Who is the mystery lady?

Melissa Shield!

Ever since my first trip to I-Island, when I met Melissa, I have been face-timing her a couple of times of week. She is a fun lady, and she doesn't get confused whenever I start talking about my conventions, unlike everybody else in my circle.

You are probably wondering: hey, how do you go on a date with Melissa when nobody is allowed to enter or leave I-Island?

That's rather simple! You break in without setting the damn alarms off! There are many ways of doing it. My style just happened to 'borrow' All Might's jet, disabling the shield for a moment, and flying in. I manage to find a private place to park, and as soon as I land, I text her my coordinates.

It takes a few minutes, but she is quick to arrive in a simple yet elegant outfit.

"Izuku! Hey, you look amazing! I thought you were kidding about coming here!" I am literally wearing Nezu's cosplay without the stupid vest. However, I give her a bright smile as I jump out of the jet.

"I don't know how to joke. I do whatever the flippity flop I want. Oh, here! I got these for you!" I reach in my back pocket to pull out a bouquet of Marigolds and hand it to her. She flashes me one of her beautiful smiles.

"Wow, thanks! But why Marigolds?"

"Because when I saw you, I knew I struck gold." I have been spending WAY too much time with Hizashi if I made a joke like that. God, you can knock me out right now.

Her laughter rings through the fake valley (because it is fake, let's be honest with ourselves, folks.).

"I will admit that your joke was clever. Do you have any idea what you're going to do now? You only asked me out on impulse an hour ago." That's what happens when people start calling you out on being unable to get a date. I don't regret it, though!

"Um, I don't have my life planned five minutes from now, and you expect me to have a date planned? I'm improvising this shit."

"Language!"

"Sorry, my lady! Wait, where is that coffee shop thing?"

"Yeah, I'll lead the way."

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"I might be a horrible boyfriend, but I either hack my money into your currency, or you pay, and I pay you back later."

"Why is everything you say kind of suspicious, Izuku?"

"I will be honest with you: I have been to jail before. I never want to go back again, but I am too impulsive not to be wanted, so I learned to avoid it in all ways possible."

"Somehow, that doesn't surprise me."

"Does that mean you hold low standards for me?"

"To that extent, yeah. I'll pay if you order."

"Deal!" Melissa hands me a ten-dollar bill, and I walk up to the cashier to get us two smoothies. I come back and slide hers over, "Here ya go. The lady is salty. I see why you didn't want to talk to her."

"Uh-huh. Tell me about yourself." Oh shit, this question. Time to make myself look cool!

"Let's see: I am impulsive. I'm a UA hero and support course student. I'm a slave to Nezu. I have one unrelated brother/bestie that likes to pet me, who is really gay for my other blonde bestie. Oh, and my third bestie walks around in an outfit you find in a strip club."

"That is the most...unique...description someone has given me."

"You're welcome! Your turn?"

"Well, you already know my dad. I study at the university here in hopes of becoming just like him."

"Hopefully not making illegal shit."

"Language, but no. I'm stuck here for the rest of my life. I'm quirkless, but make up for it in brains."

"Sounds familiar." However, somebody has to interrupt our date. Well, multiple bodies.

"GET OVER HERE!" I turn around to see security running at me.

"Oh shit shit shit! I got to go, sweetheart, but first!" Throwing away my phobia for a moment, I pull Melissa and give her a peck on the lips. When I pull back, she is blushing, "You're cute like that. Bye-bye!" I bring her into a hug before I run through the buildings to find the stupid jet.

Thankfully, nobody has found the jet yet. I run in, slam the door, get in the cockpit, and fly off while hacking the field away for a moment.

Once I am in the air and flying back home, I pull out a bottle of germ-x, unscrew the top, and down the whole thing to get rid of the germs that I got from kissing her.

And that is how you go on a date! Take that, Shouta! I got me a woman way faster than you got a man!

Anyway, see ya! I hope I don't die from poisoning myself!