Prompt: What if Izuku and Shouta did not meet before UA?
This is one of my personal ideas, and I had this planned for at least a month. I just haven't bothered with it until now. Some parts will be a little awkward probably, so just a warning.
NOT FINISHED. I lost inspiration for it, so I am posting it now.

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Welcome to the mess I call my life! I'm your host Izuku Midoriya and I am bringing you first source content from UA!

When I mean UA, I mean UA as in the top hero school in Japan that has an extremely low acceptance rate to join the hero course.

And guess which quirkless fuck got into the hero course? Me! In fact, I got the most points on the practical exam SO SUCK MY DICK, ALL MIGHT!

I am allowed to throw some shade on that man because he and so many other heroes said it was impossible for me to be a hero. Thinking about it, I have never heard someone say that I could be a hero. Well, I will become a hero for myself and others.

You know what they say: you have to save yourself before you can save others.

Currently, I am in class 1-A in the corner of the room playing Minecraft on the world's smallest laptop. I could do so many other things right now, but, not to be cocky, but I am pretty confident in myself.

"DEKU! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" I huff as I look up to see a pomeranian possibly on heat approaching me. The class goes quiet to watch the drama.

"Same reason as you. You?" I quickly jerk my laptop back to avoid getting the poor baby smashed. Oh, and his name is Bakugo by the way.

"THAT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!"

"That's what my sperm-donor said before my mom got pregnant, and she still did!"

Suddenly, an arm chops between us, "You're both highly disrespectful! Apologize to one another!" When I look up, I see the strict version of Ingenium.

"Uh, no? I'm not going to let this bastard mow me down like grass. I recommend you fuck off because you're getting into a dangerous situation, Iida."

"But-!"

A female voice interrupts him, "Izuku! I'm glad we're in the same class!" Ooo, it's Uraraka, a girl I saved at the exam!

"Me too, babe!" She instantly blushes.

"I thought you said you couldn't blush in real life!"

"Practice makes perfect-"

"STOP TALKING TO HER AND FOCUS ON ME, YOU DAMN DEKU!" Why does Bakugo have to ruin everything?

"No, because the teacher is behind her." Uraraka looks confused for a moment, but when she turns around, she squeals when she sees a caterpillar at her feet.

Instantly, everyone goes to their seat.

The caterpillar speaks as it-wait, he - crawls out of his shell, "It took you eight seconds to shut up. That's not going to work. Time is precious. Rational students would understand that. Hello, I'm Aizawa...your teacher." It takes every bit of self-control not to go off on this guy.

My history with teachers is more disgusting than Endeavor's background (yes, I know). It's an instinct to rebel. It makes me excited to rebel and I do whatever the fuck I want; however, that's not going to work here. I need to keep myself together for three years before I start shit again as an underground hero.

Will I survive? Fuck no! So I'm going to be pushing limits ALOT.

Oh, I should talk about Aizawa...well...he looks like a hobo. I mean, he literally pulls out a fruit pouch and downs that bitch like dick. Okay, maybe that joke is a bit far, but still! I mean, he looks so done with life...me!

If you put this guy in front of me and asked me if he was a hero, I would have said no.

That is if I didn't know too much.

Aizawa is Eraserhead, an underground hero with an erasure quirk, allowing him to take away quirks. Honestly, this guy is the closest to being a quirkless hero at the moment. I notice how he scans everyone, trying to see who everyone is. When he looks at me, he watches me for an extra second before facing the class. I wonder if he already realizes that I'm going to be trouble? Makes it easier on my part.

Back to him, I guess.

Aizawa pulls out UA gym uniforms as he says with a bored tone, " Puts these on and meet me on the field in ten minutes. If you aren't there within that time-limit, don't bother coming; you're expelled." With that, he places the uniforms on the desk and leaves.

I'm the first to move and grab mine because I fucking hate sitting still! I can hear Iida trying to lecture me, but he can lecture to my ass.

Afrer changing, I'm the first to arrive on the field.

Aizawa notices and suddenly approaches before holding his hand up, "Phone."

Oh, he's really testing me now, "Why?"

"I don't know how you hack, and I don't need you hacking through this to screw it up." That leaves me curious, but I know this guy's history.

"Is this an assessment of sorts? Quirk assessment possibly?" Aizawa raises an eyebrow, but he doesn't express anything else.

"Yes. Hand it over along with any other electronics" I hand my phone over, and I watch Aizawa put it in his pocket and go back to his original position. I pull out my water bottle filled with vodka and take a sip. I'll need it to prevent myself from beating a bitch up.

Once the students arrive, Aizawa starts talking, "You're going to be taking physical assessments to figure out."

Uraraka, not the smartest in the pack, asks, "Wait, but what about orientation?"

Aizawa faces her, "That's a waste of time. If you really want to make it to the big leagues, you can't waste time on pointless ceremonies. If you want to become a pro, you'll have to push yourself to the brink for the next three years. You'll go through one terrible hardship after another at UA to become the best you can be. Go beyond. Plus Ultra Style. Show me what you got. Here at UA, we aren't tethered to traditions. Now, Bakugo, you had the second-most points in the exam. How far could you throw a ball in the distance throw in junior high?"

Bakugo looks up, "67 meters, I think."

"Right, " Aizawa throws a ball at him, "throw this in the circle, but this time use your quirk. Go ahead. You're wasting time."

Bakugo does that while screaming 'DIE'...something tells me you shouldn't say that out loud, but Aizawa accepts it. When he shows the score, it's 705.2 meters.

"The education system is irrational to think of keeping everyone on the same level. It holds the stronger students back. You will be using your quirks for these test to see where you are at." That hypes the students up, but one idiot decides to say that this will be fun, "Idiots. So you think this will be fun? You have three years here to become a hero. Let me throw this at you then: the student that gets last place will be expelled."

All my classmates may look shocked, but I am fucking excited. Finally, a challenge! Bring it, hobo!

"That isn't fair!" Uraraka points out with some salt. UH, LIFE ISN'T FAIR-

"And you think natural disasters and power-hungry heroes are? It's our job as heroes to make things as fair as possible. Now, we're wasting time talking. Get to it."

OH YES! HOBO MAY HATE ME, BUT I LIKE HIM!

The test themselves are relatively easy. Somehow, despite being quirkless, I got 15th out of 20, so I ain't that bad.

Though, I can feel the salt coming off of Bakugo.

However, to my disappointment, Aizawa didn't expel anyone. Guess he deemed all of us worth it besides me. Look, I see him watching me. Something is going on. I just don't know what.

---

Class is still boring at UA. We had to take tests to see where we are at, and they are way too easy.

That means suffering for me because I have nothing to do. Fun Fact: I'm horrible at sitting still. It's practically giving me an excuse to act out. I already drank all the vodka, so that shit ain't calming me down.

If I may be honest, I almost did during Present Mic's class. Yes, in my favorite hero's class, I almost fucked up.

Before I get a chance to do anything, an unsolved Rubix cube is suddenly placed on my desk. When I look up, I see Present Mic bent down beside my desk and whisper, "Almost there, kid. Give them a few more minutes. You're doing good." As soon as he finishes, he stands up and goes back to the front.

Yip. This is why Present Mic is my favorite hero.

It only takes less than a minute for me to finish, but I guess I can shut up for the time being.

Other than that, absolutely boring.

---

After a lunch made by the fabulous Lunch Rush (2nd favorite hero now), it's time for the hero class!

"I AM COMING THROUGH THE DOOR LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!"

Nevermind, I want to drop this school! Fuck All Might!

AND HE REALLY BURSTS MY BUBBLE! YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?!

All Might tries to exclude me from the exercise! Now, I am the only dumbass that I know that would challenge All Might. Basically, if my team (Uraraka and I) wins against Bakugo and Iida, I get to stay. Otherwise, I ditch this joint.

Bless, I win.

Unfornutually, that means at the end of the day, All Might has some shit to talk to me about.

"Midoriya, I will be against you until you drop this course." All Might, well, more like depression Might, tells me.

I lay back in the chair, " Okay. And? You make it seem like you're special. You aren't, mate! You just got lucky someone gave you a quirk." OH, I AM PULLING OUT THE BIG GUNS!

"Just because we made that deal doesn't mean I won't pull back on it. Watch the attitude, Young Midoriya."

I get up because I have more vital things to worry about, " As much as I would love to be torn apart by the number one hero, I need to get home to Mom."

"I didn't dismiss you."

"And I didn't ask you to be a teacher, let alone a bad one, but here we are! I'm not here to be constantly told that I can't be a hero; I'm here to learn how to be a hero. I mean, this is a school after all. If you aren't going to teach me how, I'm more than willing to drop. I'm not here to waste my time, Yagi. Just know I can call you out on being prejudice against quirkless. " I snarl his name as I walk out.

Suddenly, I feel someone grab my left bicep. I snap, "I recommend you let go. I will fight, bitch."

To my surprise, it isn't All Ass but Aizawa who was coming in. He tightens his grip and asks, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, you know, just All Might and I having a little chat. Let go, Aizawa." Surprisingly, he does.

However, that isn't without a warning, "Watch yourself, problem child."

"Got it, Hobo." I don't bother to give him a chance to respond as I head out.

Congrats to me for staying at UA for ONE day! I will be surprised if I haven't fucked my chances over for calling Aizawa what he is!

---

The next day, I am sent to Nezu, a rat and somehow the principal of UA. Okay, the somehow is me being annoying, but I know why. It's because he's a genius.

So was I banned from UA?

Somehow, no. In fact, let me do you one better; Nezu made me his student and let me take support classes as well as hero courses!

With my luck, that didn't come without a sacrifice. Nezu realized that I was drinking, so he forced me to go cold turkey. No drinking. No smoking. I get nothing.

IT.

WAS.

HELL.

I've been drinking since I was twelve, so to suddenly go off of it made me a bitch to society.

Thankfully, I only have to worry about exploding on Aizawa. I could give two shits about All Might.

Though, I have a feeling Aizawa will get rid of me anyway.

---

The next days are hell, and when Friday is around, class 1-A is voting for president.

Somehow, my dumbass won. I immediately passed my role to Iida, a robot, because I WASN'T WILLING TO DEAL WITH IT!

THEN, THE MEDIA 'BROKE IN!' BUT LET'S BE HONEST, THAT WAS JUST A PLOY FOR THE LEAGUE OF LEGENDS FUCKWADS TO GET IN JUST TO KILL ALL MIGHT!

I would have totally supported them too if they did a decent job, but they didn't!

It's also at this moment when I realized that Aizawa is an idiot because this man decides to join the rave party in the center of town. Of course, I didn't feel like seeing him die as, to be honest, I'm impressed he got through so many. I

Basically, I killed a blue-version of Big Buff Bird by electrocuting it to death.

And to make matters worst, All Might was supposed to be there, but he wasn't! All the damage could have been avoided if All Up His Bum was here, but no! He decided to throw away his time like a drug dealer! He came after I finished those fuckers up.

Yes, I was very salty. As soon as I did my stupid report to the detective, I walked out of UA with my middle finger up.

So, what's next?

Well, first off, I learned that Aizawa had to wait a week to get rid of my dumbass, privileges to Nezu there, and I'm still here. I'm not even going to try and figure out why he accepted a brat.

Second, and more importantly, we have the Sports Festival.

I got first in the first two events, but I failed in the third event while making this huge hoo-ha about me being quirkless.

Oh, and daddy issues. Iida's brother also got paralyzed during the thing, so Tokoyami got third place.

How pleasant!

Bakugo got first and hot babe got second, but we only care about second place.

Then, we have internships.

The problem? Nobody is willing to accept a quirkless kid except one person who I shall now refer to as Jesus.

Fucking Aizawa. Something makes me wonder if he has been drinking.

---

"Stay out of trouble, and listen to your instructors. Know that you can't wear your costume without permission or use your quirks. Now get out, " Aizawa says to everybody at the train station.

Well, except me. He gets to deal with me 24/7 for the next week, so he can keep me out of trouble.

Maybe.

That's a big lie. Nobody can get me out of trouble.

I watch my classmates leave me with a hobo, and Aizawa and I are off!

"How do you feel about dealing with the most troublesome student for the next week?" Let me satisfy my curiosity here.

Aizawa sighs, "Midoriya, to make both of our lives easier, ask only essential questions."

"It is essential to me!"

"You're smart. You know what I mean."

"Fine. Why did you keep me? Actually, why are you doing any of this?" I can tell Aizawa wasn't prepared for this question. Yet, he manages to figure out an answer.

"You don't lack potential. If anything, you have the most out of all your classmates. However, what holds you back is your loud personality. That's why people don't respect you, Midoriya, but I know that isn't entirely you. That's why I am helping. Your personality can be your greatest asset, and I seen you get off of alcohol because of it, but you need to learn how to use it correctly."

"Huh. Alright then." I have nothing to say.

This is going to be an interesting experience.