Prompt: The squad goes out for Black Friday.
I'm so disappointed in myself for just thinking of this before Black Friday, so I'm having to figure something out. I literally just went 'I wonder how much chaos the squad would have with everything being on sale,' made this exact prompt you are reading, and going on impulse because I have no idea how I am going to be writing this. Wish me luck!
Lack of arm purely for jokes.
Edit after: Slightly rushed, especially at the end, so just a warning.

- - -

"RED ROBIN!"

You can hear the fucking children running from their rooms.

"YUM!" I wish I had a screaming quirk.

"YUM!"

Yes. This is the squad mating call. Nemuri and Hizashi appear in command despite the fact everyone here, including myself, has work to do even though it is Thanksgiving. Breaks don't exist for heroes!

Unfortunately, Shouta doesn't show up. He never does for the call, and it's kind of sad.

The first thing that is said is from Hizashi, "What are we destroying today?!"

I attempt to clap my hands together only to remember that my right arm was donated to charity. The charity called, um, fire. It was unwillingly, but I digress. We work with what we got.

I pull out a toy clapper and use that instead with a lack of satisfaction, " Believe it or not, we aren't destroying anything today."

Nemuri calmly walks over and bends down to my height, "Sweetheart, are you okay?" I get I am destructive but damn!

"I said today. I didn't say tomorrow."

Nemuri straightens up, "You think you have the patience to wait a whole day before doing something about Sho taking CAT?"

"Oh, I'm just building a second CAT out of pettiness." Nemuri laughs while Hizashi claps at the brilliant idea, "However, that isn't why I called y'all."

Nemuri sits down on the couch while Hizashi joins beside me, where I happen to be standing on the coffee table.

Hizashi states, "Spill the tea, sis!"

I clear my throat, "You two know what tomorrow is, right?"

At the same time, Nemuri squeals, "Black Friday!" While Hizashi says, "The 27!"

Nemuri and I both look at the man. Hizashi hesitantly rubs the back of his neck, "Am I wrong?"

I click my tongue, "No, but we both know that I don't care about the number date."

"Then get off my back, Izu!"

Nemuri cuts him off, "You have a plan for tomorrow?"

"Duh! We're going to get what we need while saving money! Oh, and get some fights going."

"I assume we will need costumes for this so we don't get recognized?"

"Yip yip! That's where this box comes in!" I exclaim as I point to the box next to me.

Hizashi looks at it confused, "How did I not see it there?" Nemuri joins in that question.

"I don't know. Y'all must suck or something."

"HEY! MEANIE!"

"We're aware. Now, I made sure to get your sizes, so if it's fucked up, blame the people who made it, not me, " I bend down and pull out my costume, "We're all going to be Santa's elves with masks!"

Nemuri quickly grabs her elf costume, and gushes, "They're so cute!"

Hizashi picks his up as well and looks inside the box to notice another one, "Please tell me we are making Sho wear one."

I grin, "Of course we are! The squad has to stay together despite the 4th person not giving a damn about it!"

Speak of the devil, his voice ruins the whole mood, "What are you brats planning?"

Good thing I have a cover, "I want everyone in the squad to dress up like elves including you! I already got the costume! You just have to put it on!"

"No."

"Please?"

"No. You're already in trouble for exploding Yagi's closet."

"I was doing Japan an honor by destroying those ugly-ass clothes."

Shouta sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose, "That's not your right, idiot."

"Rights don't exist. Now, wear this."

"No." I look at Hizashi for help, and he comes up with a brilliant plan.

Hizashi joins Nemuri on the couch and leans against her, "If you don't wear the elf costume, I will makeout with Nemuri with now." I would just like to mention that I would never do this. This is something I can say that Hizashi has one-upped me on, and I'm okay with that.

Shouta doesn't look amused, "You're joking." Nemuri, following through, wraps her around around Hizashi and pulls him closer. She takes his chin and makes him face her.

I expected a lot of things when I asked for help, but this is some next level fuckery. I would fake a date for food and shit, but I wouldn't fake cheat to get my mans/womans to do something. Thankfully, Shouta is very aware that there is no feelings besides lips and friendship.

That doesn't mean he won't get pissed about it anyway.

Shouta stomps over to Hizashi, lifts him over his shoulder, grabs the box with his elf costume, and leaves to his room.

I look at Nemuri and ask, "Out of curiousity, if Shouta did not do that, would y'all have done it?"

Of course, this lady purrs, "Wouldn't be the first time, Izu."

I take my costume and leave. I didn't need to know that. I don't even want to know the circumstances for that to happen.

TMI, Nemuri. I may be a curious brat about my friends, but I want to forget this.

Shouta and Hizashi are Shouta and Hizashi only. Nobody else.

- - -

"You are the most depressing looking elf I have ever met, Sho, " I tell him as soon as he walks out of his room with this grumpy face.

He facepalms, "You know very well why."

I tilt my head innocently, "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"You didn't have us dress up in elf costumes with masks for no reason. What do you plan on doing, Problem Child?"

"I promise you that nobody in the squad will be arrested tonight."

"That's very encouraging. It doesn't help that you dyed your hair black to match mine and gotten black contacts, so you're planning something "Shouta says with the most sarcastic tone possible. I'm not responding to that one.

"ELF ZASHI IN THE HOUSE!" Hizashi screams as loud as possible without his quirk as he comes out in his civilian wear elf-style.

"AMEN!" I yell, immediately feeling a whack upside the head from Shouta, but I don't care! We are about to destroy and save money!

It only takes a couple minutes later for Nemuri to strut out in her new outfit. I managed to find her a girl one, though I made sure it wasn't slutty as that's what her hero form is known for, "Everyone is so cute!"

"Yip yip! Now, everyone ready to hit the road?!" Two of the three squad members express confirmation. Of course, you know who the trouble is.

"You never got permission to go out, " Shouta starts as he watches me leave.

"I got it from Zashi and Nem. They count!"

"I'm your main guardian as your homeroom teacher and I can overrule that."

"I'm a teacher assistant who can leave and go whenever I want." As I am about to leave, I feel his scarf around my wrist to stop me.

"I'm also your guardian even without paperwork. I get the same say as Inko would in this situation. You're planning trouble. You don't need to get into unnecessary trouble for attention." Hizashi and Nemuri are smart in not interferring as they don't have the ability to get me out.

That doesn't mean someone can't get me out.

All the sudden, the door opens to reveal Nezu in an elf costume like the rest of us, "Good evening, everyone! I was wondering if there would be room for one more?" No wonder Nezu is the principal of UA. He's willing to join me to start shit.

Before Shouta gets a chance to say something, I cut him off, "Sure! But first, tell Sho to let me go because he doesn't want me causing trouble."

Shouta growls, "It makes me life more difficult when I know you're smart enough not to do this, let alone purposefully."

Nezu just smiles, "Aizawa, please let Izuku go. Since there seems to be a disagreement, how about a deal?"

Now he has my interest, "What kind of deal?" I see his insane side go into his eyes, and I'm intrigued.

"For each time Izuku causes trouble that is deemed unheroic, he owes one favor to Aizawa each time, but it doubles each time. First time is one, second time two, third time four, and so on. For each heroic deed Izuku does, it removes one favor. Unlike Aizawa's favors, this does not double. If Izuku does not follow through with this favors in a reasonable amount of time, he will be withdrawn from all the cases he is working on at that time and will be unable to do anything for a week."

"...I fucking hate this deal. So I have to be nice to be an asshole?"

"Yes. Think of it as self-discipline training. Thinking about it, I think I will grade you based on your performance."

"Illegal."

Shouta seems to like the idea, "Damage control, kid."

"I ain't that bad."

"Do you want me to pull up all the damage costs you have built up over the year?"

"No."

"Then shut up and deal with it." Alright then. Meanwhile, Hizashi and Nemuri are awkwardly standing there, questioning their life choices.

"Fine. Let's go, squad!" I yell as I lead out. Nemuri and Hizashi follow me quickly as Shouta plucks Nezu off the ground and joins us.

- - -

"Oh, so I have a surprise for everyone!" I announce when we arrive at the mall.

"Did you get the glitter cannons built for this?!" Hizashi asks, and I have to stop and turn to him.

"Dude, we're picking those up at the party store. I ain't using my costume for it because glitter is a bitch to get off." Hizashi looks at bit sad because he wanted to do a huge one, but I compensated. I swear I hear Shouta muttering something about 'being logical' for once, and I flip him off.

Nemuri tilts her head, "Glitter cannons? Whatever, what's the surprise?!"

"We need to find it."

"Did you hire a stripper?!"

"No- I mean...actually, I don't want to think about it. No." I lead the way to the food court when I find the my target, "TENSEI! OVER HERE!"

As soon as Hizashi and Nemuri hear that name, they run off towards the wheelchair man, and Hizashi jumps Tensei.

Shouta groans as he walks slowly, "Are you kidding me? I have to deal with all of you?"

"The squad sticks together!" We approach everyone, "Hey, mate! Glad you received the costume! I wasn't sure if I got the right address."

Tensei offers me a bright smile ,"Not a problem! I'm not even concerned with how you got it! What I am is why in the hell do you look kind of like Sho? I didn't even recognize you until you spoke. It's disturbing."

I signal for everyone to sit at the round table, "I'm recognizable unlike literally else here somehow. Wait, it's not surprising. I chose to look like Shouta since I'm the youngest, and it would look weird if a bunch adults are around one teen. If I look like his brother, it looks less weird."

"And why haven't you taken over the world yet?"

"Because it's boring if I have control. Now, we have a change in plans."

"Why?"

Nezu decides now is the time to pop out, "Because I am here!" He jumps out of Shouta's scarf and sits on the table. Honestly, he is the only recognizable person in the group now, but he can get away with anything cause he is a rat.

Tensei, having known said rat for a while, asks, "Doesn't that mean we can create more trouble?"

I nearly slam my head on the table before remembering how discussing it is and stopping myself. Instead, I lightly smash my head on the nearest shoulder, which happens to be Shouta's. He'll be fine.

I sigh, "He created limitations so I would start less shit! And he's grading it!"

Nemuri decides to fill him in for me, "Basically, the more fuck ups Izuku creates without fixing it somehow, the more favors he owes Shouta."

Tensei chuckles, "That's cruel."

I give Shouta's shoulder mercy, "Which is why I am questioning Nezu now."

Nezu's interest sparks, "Oh? Ask away."

"What is the definition of an unheroic action in this case?"

"That would be any action that hurts others in any form, purposefully or not."

"Does whatever unheroic deed a squad member does count against me?"

"No. As long as they do not get in trouble, I do not mind. They are adults, after all. They can handle themselves."

"Trouble as in arrested or if they are asked to leave?"

"May I ask an example?"

"Say we all sled down the escalators."

"In that case, it is not an unheroic action, so it does not count against you. It only does if you decide to attack the people for some reason."

"I have one request."

"Yes?"

"If we see a Karen, please let me punch them."

"Not allowed unless they are risking the people around them."

"Fine. Y'all get the storelist I sent, right? That's where you need to go, and in what order based on trends for the item I saw online. This is based on what y'all said you wanted to get, so if that has changed, you're fucked."

Tensei, Nemuri, and Hizashi look at each other's list, and, somehow, Nemuri and Tensei's lists are similar. Alarmingly similar.

"Tensei and Nemuri are ready for action!" The two yell while raising their fist.

Hizashi whines, "Am I going to be alone?"

I think for a moment, "Probably. I'm just going to be hanging out at Walmart watching fights the whole time since I can't do jack shit. Shouta probably going to nap here, and Nezu is going to stalk all of us. Don't worry; you'll always be in our hearts."

"Awww! Izu! I love you!"

"Shush it. I have a street reputation to keep."

Shouta interrupts us, "I'm going with you, Izu."

I look at him confused, "Why? Interested in tea?"

"Peace in mind."

"Sho, I can defend myself if needed."

"You're going to interfere, though. You may like a fight, but if quirks start going, you are obligated to interfere. We both know this. I rather be there to back you up."

I sigh, "I'll take it. Brother bonding time! And you have a range attack! I'm an idiot for not grabbing something."

"Someone has to go in anyway. It's fine."

"True," I check my watch, "Y'all better get to the locations soon. They will start crowding soon."

"True that. I hate that I have to stand around while being crowded for an hour! With nobody I know!" Hizashi complains as he stands up.

Nemuri purrs, "At least I have a seat with me."

"I'll take it," Tensei says. The poor man.

I start to stand up with Shouta when I remember something, "Oh, here!" I pull something out of my pocket and toss one to each of them, "Now we can talk and hear each other! Now let's go!"

We all make our respective ways to our stores, and Shouta and I make it to Walmart to see it already closed for the presale, and holy shit there are people already crowding the doors.

I look at Shouta, "I feel like I'm going to end up doing more work then I thought. That's the most I've ever seen here."

Shouta nods in agreement, "Keep your distance unless you absolutely have to go in. With that many people, I'm afraid you're going to be jumped."

"Right."

"You don't need anything?"

"Nope."

"Good."

- - -

It's time for the tea!

Shouta and I decided to take the second floor of the mall so we can see the the entrance directly. Hizashi has been just rambling for the past hour, and I can hear a cringy flirt session between Tensei and Nemuri. Like, it's flirting that will never end in a relationship.

I ask Shouta suddenly, "Sho, if we have to get down there, could I jump on your back so you can bring me down and hop off after? Or would that hurt you?"

"That's fine. Just be careful when getting off because I'm still running."

I nod and we wait.

When the clock hits six, a sea of children are already bursting through by crawling under the gate that is still being lifted.

"Damn," I hear from Shouta.

"That's pretty normal. It's fine for now. Once the crowd is gone, we can head in."

That takes about two minutes, and people are still running in occasionally. Shouta attempts to walk down, but I jump over the ledge, hearing cursing from his line. He ends up using his scarf to join me quickly.

When we enter, it's a mess. Shit is thrown everywhere. People are screaming. Honestly, it's like a bunch of little stupid mes running around. It doesn't help Hizashi is screaming in my ear about getting what he wanted. He literally only had one thing.

I was heading through the crowd when I hear Shouta through the earpiece, "If there isn't too much trouble there, come to Walmart. We will need help." I look behind to see he is gone.

When the screaming picks up, I run to see multiple people using their quirks on each other. Most of them look emitter except the alligator guy, who is just winning this fight.

"Sho, I need you here. Near the TVs, " I explain quickly as I try my most innocent method; Stain's method, "Everyone calm down and continue on!"

That works for the crowd to some extent. Jesus, they have lost it.

"Izu, wait for me, "Shouta tries to explain, but I run in and grab the arm of the alligator dude who was about to smash somebody's head. Thank fuck I have my robotic arm on!

"CHILL THE FUCK OUT, MAN! That could have-!" Before I can finish, I feel something tingly land on my back, making me shiver. It feels like when you're in bed and you want to move or else it becomes painful. Gritting my teeth, I stay still until I hear the whip of the scarf getting the rest, and the tingly disappears.

"I told you to wait, brat," Shouta snaps at me as he removes them from the store and takes them to security. I follow after him with alligator.

"Obviously, I don't listen." WHY ARE THESE PEOPLE FIGHTING?! ISN'T IT SUPPOSED TO BE A SCREAMING MATCH?!

Shouta sighs. As soon as we give the fuckers away, he brings me close to him as we enter to deal with other fights.

- - -

I did get to punch a couple Karens, so I feel great.

However, I didn't get to start shit like I wanted. Shouta and I just dealt with one petty fight to another. Eventually, Hizashi and Nemuri joined us with Tensei encouraging the fights in the background since he technically isn't a hero anymore. Me.

Don't get me wrong: I did encourage some fights. I just made sure they were fist fights. Quirk fights are out of range.

We did all this in elf costumes, by the way.

Eventually, we had to go back, bidding Tensei goodbye as we leave.

"I don't remember them being this feisty ever, " Nemuri mumbles on the walk back to the dorms. Everyone agrees, even Nezu.

Nezu decides to answer, "Everyone is stressed due to the ever-growing crime rate, so it is expected of them to be more violent."

"They just made me depressed, " I state with conviction.

Hizashi says, "Same."

Nezu claps, "On the bright side, you did more hero work than unheroic, so great job!"

I flip Nezu off.

"Oh, none of that! I have a reward for you!"

I perk up, "A reward?"

"I'll let you skip my classes this week!"

"..this is the best present of my entire life. Thank you for blessing me a week away from your rambles."

When we get back to the dorms, we don't say a thing as we head back to our rooms and go antisocial.

Or, in my case, do a bleach bath of the century.