Anger is a savage beast that can't be tamed. It can't be steered or reasoned with. Yet, here I am, trying to reason with the ever-present rage.

"Malaya, are you okay?" Noon asks.

She is my best friend, yet she doesn't get it.

Fighting with monsters is easy. Killing is easy. Confronting my inner demons is impossible.

"I'm fine," I say trying to extinguish fire from my eyes.

A demon slayer shouldn't be the same as the demons she is fighting. Yet I repeatedly find myself precariously dangling from the edge of the abyss of no return. I'm in danger of being swallowed by the same emptiness that all demons come from.

One action is all that separates me from becoming like them, from being the soulless monster.

"We need to go! More demons are coming." Noon says.

"So what? Let them come!" I say as my blood burns with the need to release the fury flowing through my veins.

What better way to resolve one's emotional issues than a vicious battle.

"There are too many of them. Even you can't defeat them all," she says.

She does have a point. I can't allow fury to blind me. It's not what Sun would have wanted.

Avenging his death at the cost of other demon slayers dying is unacceptable.

"Fine. Retreat," I say casting the transportation portal.

Just like that we're back at the castle where we can regroup in peace.

"Malaya," a stern voice calls my name.

The moment I register who it is, I know I am in trouble. After all, the demon slayer's job is to protect the innocent, not punish the demons for what one of them did to my friend.

"Yes, sensei," I reply leaving others to take care of the wounded.

"You have broken your promise," he says disappointed.

"I apologize," I say lowering my gaze.

"Anger is like a wild fire. It rages and burns through your heart until all there is left is a blackened shell of the vibrant, loving organ that used to beat in your chest," he says.

"What am I supposed to do? Let the monster roam the Earth freely while my friend will never get to see another sunset or enjoy the feel of the wind on his skin?" I ask a few sparks escaping my fingertips.

"You are focusing on all the wrong things. You need to defeat your inner demons, your guilt before you can be victorious against your enemy," he says.

"How?" I ask.

"Accept his death. Acknowledge the fact that you cannot alter someone's destiny.

"Upon doing that, you can grieve as long as you need. Only then will you raise like a phoenix from its ashes, reborn," he says.

"No!" I exclaim tears of anger filling my eyes.

"If I accept his death, I will be accepting that I'll never see him again, never hear his voice. How am I supposed to do that?" I ask.

"If you want to honor his memory, you will find a way to do so.

"Everyone is different, so I am unable to point out the right path for you to follow. What I can tell you is to follow your heart, to listen closely to what it has to say and you'll get there," he says.

With that said, he leaves me to fight my own battles. After all, no one can fight them for me, not even my sensei.

There are things in one's life that we have face alone if we ever want to truly see an improvement in our lives. For me, that is facing my friend's death and not allowing it to consume me, to erase who I am.

The lightness of good cannot allow itself to be dimmed by the power of evil. If I allow that to happen innocent people will suffer as a consequence of my actions.

I decide to take a long walk and attempt to find the emotional balance which I have always possessed before... Before everything I ever knew was turned upside down.

A sudden noise makes me turn sharply, and that's when I see it.

The moment I lay my eyes on its huge horns and ugly face, I know that I am not looking at just any demon but the one who shattered my world.

Whether it is fate or Gods testing me, I am not sure but all I want to do is rip the beast to shreds and avenge my friend. It's as if there is a new force driving me forward, a force which stings as it courses through my body.

It takes me a moment to realize what it is and when I do I stop short of confronting my nemesis. What I am feeling is burning hate. It's something that can corrupt a demon slayer's soul, turn us into what we are fighting against.

"You killed my friend," I spit out to the demon.

"Really? Well, you humans all look the same to me," he says without bating an eye.

"You will pay for it!" I exclaim.

"Really? If I remember your warrior code correctly, your job is to protect the innocent and defend yourselves when attacked. Punishing the guilty is not in the description of your job. In fact it's strictly forbidden, something about losing your soul and all that," it says.

I grit my teeth as I realize it is right. If I were to attack it, my soul would be lost forever. It is not what my friend would have wanted me to do.

Therefore, I turn my back on the temptation and stride briskly towards the castle.

"Too much of a coward to face me?" The demon taunts me.

What he doesn't understand is I won't take the bait. I've already fought far bigger demons, my own and won. It's the first step to my recovery, but I am not about to waste it on someone who has nothing about courage.