Arham's pov

"Amal utho...kab tak soti rahogi"
(Amal wake up....till when will you sleep)
i tried to wake up this beautifull angel sleeping beside me

"ummm please let me study...i want to be a designer i beg you...i beg you" she said in her sleep
i rolled my eyes, she kept talking in her sleep all night, she kept saying please let me study please let me study, i should probably beat this thought of studying out of her mind.

i have to make her scared of me so much that she wont even dare to think about anything i dont approve of and i should start that right now smiling at my wickedness i woke her up

"UTHO!!!" i yelled
she sat up straight looking at me shocked

"time dekho....breakfast kon banayega??" i asked her rudely
(look at the time...who will make breakfast?)

she looked at the clock it was 12:00

"you didnt go to office yet?" she asked

"its Sunday but since you cant seem to wake up i am hungry till now"

"UTHO AB!!" i yelled loudly and she flinched
(GET UP NOW!!)

shakily removing the blanket she got out of the bed and ran downstairs
i smiled triumphantly

itne din se pyar se reh raha tha toh izzat raaz nahi aa rahi thi,
mere naam se b kaapegi,
mere ijazat k bina nazar tak uthaneko dus baar sochegi
(i was staying with love since so many days but respect doesnt suits her i guess,
she will shiver at even hearing my name,
she would think ten times before even raising her eyes)

Amal's pov

i reached in the kitchen, with shaky hands i began to cook, but since i was so scared stuff just kept falling from my hand
i saw arham coming towards the kitchen and the pan that i was holding fell

"what is this noise?...cant you work properly, making so much noise"

without replying i focused on cooking,
he is in a bad mood today,
one mistake and he will beat me into a pulp,
i turned around drank some water and tried to calm myself down.
I quickly served the food and went to call him
"chaliye naashta laga diya hai"
(come...breakfast is served"

i sat there looking at him trying to comprehend why is he in such a sour mood.

"get ready I'll take you shopping" i looked at him confused is he bipolar? few minutes ago he scared the crap out of me

"i am nominated for design icon award of the year you will need something designer and fancy to go there"

i looked at him shocked
"design icon award" i whispered to myself

"yeah it is a prestigious award in design commumity..."

"i know" i said in a low voice before he could complete his sentence

"i will go take a shower" i ran upstairs
opening the wardrobe i took out my journal hidden between my clothes
i flipped to the page where i had my bucket list and there it was
to win atleast one design icon award when i become a interior designer

*flashback*

"oye what do you keep writing in this diary" sam asked
snatching the picture i was cutting he asked
"what is it?"

"give it back" i demamded irritated

"what is this?...
why are you cutting pictures of a light bulb" he asked stuffing his face with sandwich

i rolled my eyes snatching the pic back i asked him "do you ever do something apart from eating and.... how are you so fit even after you eat so much junk?"

"and do you do something apart from admiring light bulbs" he asked mimicking me and laughing at his own joke

"its not light bulb you illiterate man it is a award"

"it is called design icon award you have to be really talented to earn this award I'll earn this one day you will see...I'll invite you only if you will cheer for me" i said proudly

"will there be food?" he asked and we both started laughing

"chal koi na...nahi bhi mila award toh mai deduga tujhe" he said
(no problem...even if you dont get the award I'll give you one)

*end of flashback*

i heard the bedrooms door click and i hurridly hided the diary, wiping my tears i acted as if i am searching for something

"you didnt shower yet?"

"umm...i was looking for something to wear, i am going now"

i rushed in the bathroom and closed the door
huff thank allah i am spared... if he would have seen it phirse bharta bana deta mera
(he will beat me into a pulp again)

i showered and got dressed in a comfortable jeans, knee length sweater and white sneakers, stepping out i grabbed a hijab and overcoat matching my outfit

i dried my hair, wore the hijab and accessories, taking the overcoat in my hand i ran downstairs,
"i am ready"
he looked up from his phone
"i am waiting in the car" he said and walked away,

as i went near the door, the slap, the belt, the lashes, all of it flashed in my mind. sighing i stepped my foot out
i am stepping out of the house after 20 days
even though 10 days ago i went to the cafe it cant be counted as going out i went straight to the cafe across the street and came back

i walked down the steps... last time i walked out of here i got lashed for stepping out.

it feels unreal to be out, it feels like i am doing something rare, like i am doing something that i am not supposed to do.

when we reached the mall he got out of the car and i sat still remembering

" lesson number 2 ...you get out of the car when i ask you to and you walk when i am with you understood?"

i glared at him he asked again "understood??"

"lesson number 3 give answer in yes or no"

he came to my side and asked
"do you need a invitation to come out?"

i stepped out and looked at him annoyed
"you only said to not walk out without you"

he smirked "so you are learning ha!!"
i mentally rolled my eyes if you will beat the hell out of me...obviously i remember everything

we walked inside side by side and he stepped directly into an huge store that was bigger than any store in the mall
as i went inside i was shocked to see that this place had such a nice collection of Indian and pakistani clothes

my eyes got stuck at a red dress on the mannequin

while arham went and picked handfull of dresses
"amal..go try these on"
i teared my eyes away from the red dress and went inside the changing room.

i tried every dress one by one and showed arham but i kept looking at the red dress
after arham selected a dress i mustered up the courage to tell him i mean he is so rich and he can for sure afford it
"arham...can i try that one on?"
i said pointing towards the mannequin

he looked at it and said sure
i went inside the changing room happily and the staff brought the dress for me i tried it on and swirled around first time in months, i felt a little bit happy

as soon as i walked out arham chuckled
"the style is funny"
"i dont like it"

my face fell
"i do like it" i said slowly

"but i dont" he said in a stern voice
"go change it.... I'll pay the bill"
i looked down and turned towards the changing room
i tried to stop my tears from coming out.
i changed and got out arham bought the dress that he chose then he bought accessories and everything else and i didnt look at anything else after that red dress, its no use looking at anything.
arham doesnt needs my opinion i should not look at things and then want them.

when we reached home it was almost
maghrib i walked up to the room and changed into a salwar suit, i did my wuzu and offered my salah...now a days i cry a lot in my dua even when i dont ask for anything, i just sit there my hands raised, i close my eyes and ask allah for peace, to make my life easy as i was crying in dua i felt someones presence behind me...
"kisko yaad karke ro rahi ho?"
(who are you missing and crying?)
asked arham in a mocking tone

standing up i said
"no one" in a cold voice

"what will you eat for dinner?" i added folding my prayer mat

"you" he said and in a snap he pushed me towards him and we both fell on the bed he was on top of me, he started removing my top i stopped his hand he looked at me with angry eyes

"i am in my periods" I lied

"what??..i thought i already got you pregnant" he chuckled

"pr..pregnant?" i looked at him wide eyes

"yeah pregnant...i want babies"

"i dont want babies right now" i said panicked

"who is asking for your opinion?" he asked as if what he was saying is completely normal

"i am the one who has to give birth and i am the one who has to do the upbringing...i am just 22 and we just got married i dont want any babies" it came out harsher than i intended it to be

"shhh...." he kept his finger on my lips

"one more back answer and you will be begging me to stop"

"do i need to remind you" he paused and looked at me amused

"how you beg, please please stop it hurts i wont do it again" he said mimicking me
i looked at him teary eyed is he making fun of me? does it looks funny to him when he beats me?

"go serve the dinner"
"and btw I know you are lying about periods since just a second ago offered salah, you cant fool me amal, but dont worry I'll punish you at night for this lie"

i sighed i am so tired.. now I'll have to cook ughhh what am i doing at the peak of my youth?
cooking meals,
getting beatened up,
getting trained like a puppy.

i am nothing but a puppet for him
i dont think he has any idea that i have emotions and feelings,
to him i am just a body to use for pleasure and a trophy to show off.