S5: No one remembers you, [S12]
S12: SHUT UP

Instructor: [S4], put your book away or I'll read the last page of it so you'll know the ending
S4: I've already read this book three times
Instructor: Okay, then I'll write on the last page and read it aloud to you so you'll know the new ending

Instructor: and hey, lots of you are smaller and lighter than you think you are, so [the TA] can totally take you

S9: we found where the clock went.

S12: Apparently looking stupid is a hobby of [S2]'s now!

Instructor: Also, stop taking weird pictures of [S12]. We all know she's not photogenic.

S12: Okay, so there's like a whole backstory! [S13] and [S3] were in love but then [S13] cheated on [S3] with the floor!

S9: Why dopamine when you can just rage?

S3: They should hold gladiator battles for all the middle schools in a school district to decide who gets the most funding! And another
one for all the elementary schools. And all the high schools.
S13: No, they should get the gladiators in a boss fight where the goal is to do as much percent of damage as possible and friendly fire is enabled so you can sabotage. Then, the percent of damage done to the boss is the percent of all the money the school district has the school gets.
S3: The boss is just some bodybuilder they kidnapped.
S9: The boss is the superintendent. The champions of each school are the teacher everybody loves and the teacher everybody hates, and they should allow sponsorships like in the Hunger Games.
S13: In that case, the boss has to be moving, too.
S9: Yes, of course. That way we allow unexpected encounters and an extra layer of stealth skill. The order in which they forfeit/die corresponds to the percentage of funds each school gets. It changes up every year as the poor schools get more desperate and the rich schools invest more time into training for their teachers. All the teachers standardized because they don't want to be too loved, nor too hated.
Spongebob narrator voice: A FEW MINUTES LATER
S9: The world slowly devolves as a result of the corrupted education system. The world begins to depend and rely on violence and strength. Soon we get a survival of the fittest world. And [S13] and [S3] die because emo catgirls don't survive.
S13: HEY I AM NOT AN EMO CATGIRL
S9: [S3] is though. [S3] x [S13] makes you an emo catgirl by extension, winning the link to our solvency.

S3: [S9], you give off celery stick vibes.

S13: I have realized that I randomly make cat noises which is not good for my goal of not being a catboy
S9: OUR OPPONENT READS A CARD THAT TURNS TO OUR CASE
S10: [S13] is rubbing off on you!!!

S13: begin operation chug soy milk.

S3: SAGANDEEZ NUTS
S3: sorry
S10: you better be!
S6: what are you, ten?
S10: no, he's just emo

S13: me when Magnus Chase (that series sucked)
Me: *surprised pikachu face*

S9: legal disclaimer: The Sun (C) did not pass the bar exam as she is not a certified lawyer. any advice she gives you is not necessarily legally advisable. The same goes with this message, as I am not certified either.

And now I present the chat during our tournament last weekend!

S14: naught, nil, nix, none, nothing, nought, zero.

S14: [S12] kicked the door and got in trouble!
S10: oh naurs.

S10: OHHH you guys WERE making out!
S9: I mean, where else would they go between first and second round?

S3: I'm gonna go chug a pint of Jack Daniels
S9: Do you want a guaranteed loss for first elims?
S3: yes
S9: ok seems reasonable but underage drinking makes people idiots
S9: oh wait-
S13: I am all for [S3] getting blackout drunk
S9: I mean if he kisses the floor that would be funny

S14: I screamed at my opponent's in summary. I rebutted every single contention, impact, paragraph, sentence, word, syllable, and letter of their whole entire case and rebuttal. but [S4] was eating skittles in the middle of cross and was terrible. I think I lost this one and that I lost all the rounds I lost because of [S4] being bad. 🥺😭😓😩😫

S3: ok matilda at least ur not asian 🙄🙄🙄

S11: [S9].
S9: [S11].
S10: :( why are yall so mad
S10: its better than skibidi toilet right :D
S9: ...

S11: I'm going to pick up [S2] and throw her off a roof

S14: HELLLLLP [S4] NEVER HAS ANY QUESTIONS DURING CROSS
S10: ask them what they ate for breakfast

S14: SHE'S ALSO YELLING AT HER WATCH!!!
S14: OUT LOUD
S14: AND SAYING DIE, TWO MINUTES!!!
TWO!!! TWO!!!

S2: js bc i play fn all day doesn't mean i cant have intellectual debates w my teammates

A/N finally, please go read Tell Me My Name by Amy Reed. S11 has been raving about it all week and sending excerpts and all I can say is I WANT TO MONCH THAT WRITING STYLE IT IS AMAZING
Have a nice day!
- Lin :D