--- Deans Point of View ---
(Before the marking)

"How are the numbers looking for this quarter?" My father asked from the speakerphone. I sat at my desk and was trying to hold a meeting with my dad while he was at another chemo treatment with my mother.

"The numbers seem fine, a little lower than last years but nothing too concerning at the moment."

"That's good." He sounded. "Have we done the checks for the week yet...I emailed you about a couple of guys getting raises, they deserve it so please crunch some numbers and make it happen son at least a dollar each."

I sighed, "of course." I said as I looked up at the clock, I would be late getting home or i'd have to take work home with me.

"Enough with our job...how's everything going Alpha wise?"

At this I couldn't help but feel ashamed. "Things are getting there." I tried to assure him.

"Son, I know Casssandra is new to all of this but try and ease her into the situation, you'll have to mark her sooner rather than later..." There was a long pause and I figured he was leaving the room. "Your mothers health isn't going to hold up forever either and I know she'd love to see you two married, not to mention have at least one grandchild."

"So not much pressure then." I sounded sarcastically.

"I know it's a lot son but you're our only son and the Alpha of this pack...it's time to start stepping up to the plate."

I sat back in my seat and looked out the large window behind me. "I shouldn't even be Alpha of this pack."

"We can't change the past and the sooner you realize that the easier things will be son."

"He was my bestfriend dad...I'm the reason he's dead."

"You need to stop with this already Dean, I loved Ryan like my own son...you know that...but I can't just keep watching you tear away at yourself because of this Dean... you didn't ask him to get the car and you damn sure didn't tamper with your own car...it was an unfortunate accident."

"How can Cassandra be with someone like me?" I asked, my emotions getting the better of me as I gripped into my desk hard to keep myself grounded and not punch the large window behind me out of anger.

"Son she's your mate, she loves you but her love can only carry your relationship so far...be her partner, talk with her about what's going on."

I shook my head, "I can't let her see me like this...I'm sure she already knows I'm a monster."

"You're not son, I only wish you could see the brilliant young man I raised...go home, be with your mate and try and clear your mind of this uneasiness."

We hung up after that.

I headed home and was greeted by Cassandra holding a box of pizza. I guess me keeping my distance from her was catching up to me...I didn't want my mate to have to be near a killer and so I had knowingly been keeping her at arms length. But at this moment my wolf took over and acted on his own as we took the pizza from her and placed it on the floor before having our way with her.

My wolf was all for going forward and having sex with her... We missed her. But somehow I was able to gain control from my wolf and I pulled back.

As beautiful as she is, I felt like shit partaking in something so amazing when I knew I hardly deserved the pleasure of being with her.

I picked up our dinner and tried to make light of the situation but I could tell something was wrong. "Is everything okay love?"

"I don't know Dean, IS everything okay?" She asked sarcastically. "You've never initiated sex and then pulled away like I repulse you or something...d-do you not want to mark me?"

How in the hell could she possibly think that she could ever turn me off, all I've wanted to do was mark her since the moment I found out she was ours...but I refuse to let her tie herself to me, a monster, a killer...but I also knew she was like my father, they loved me too much to ever see anything but good in me.

"It's not that love, I swear I love you and will do anything to keep you happy...how about we just enjoy our dinner?" I suggested as a form of getting Her to move on to another topic.

"Dean you didn't exactly answer my question...do you not want to mark me?"

"Of course I do." I replied defensively before I got caught up in the truth of the matter "...the thing is once I mark you it can't be undone Cassandra." I knew trying to explain would be a lost cause so I decided it would be best if I left it alone..."I've got some work I need to finish, I'll join you in bed later."

I went into my office and knowingly locked the door otherwise I'd run the risk of her coming in here and I'd mark her for sure out of my own selfish need.

As my father had asked me earlier I ran some numbers and was able to get some of the employees the raises they deserved. I finished up some assignments as well for an online class I'm also taking and then checked a couple of my emails and got a few responses.

The most important was from my cousin Jaxon.

______Jaxon's email______

Thank you for extending an invitation to my family and I Alpha Dean, we will gladly accept your request for our attendance and look forward once agin to seeing both yourself and your lovely mate, Luna to be Cassandra.
Best Wishes to my aunt and uncle,
-Jax

I knew I would have to ask him to be my Beta, and as if I wasn't stressing enough between work with dad, school, and being a new Alpha, I now had to wonder about my cousins possible answer.

When I finally finished up it was close to three in the morning, the witching hour and I know how light a sleeper Cassandra is. Instead of possibly waking her (knowing she has to be up early for school and needs her rest) I decided to bunk in one of the guest bedrooms.

I set my alarm and hour early so I could get a shower in before she woke up and then I drifted off to sleep, but not without difficulty as I didn't have my mate near me.

__________

"Good morning." Cassandra sounded as I entered the kitchen the next morning.

"Morning love..." I said as I checked my phone, it seems I had an emergency meeting at town hall with the chief of police about zoning issues that pertained to the pack as well as the humans. "I apologize in advance but I'm already running late, do you think Steph can pick you up this morning?"

"No problem...Dean I'd really like to talk to you."

I heard her words but didn't listen to the desperation in them "We'll talk at dinner babe, I've really got to go."

"No Dean now!"

If I was being honest I would say that her response had taken me completely by surprise.

I looked up from my phone and truly saw her for the first time in days...She looked drained, and her lovely eyes were on the verge of tears

"I'm tired of this pass and go conversation bullshit we've been having lately" she sounded sadly "...I'm your mate and I can tell something's wrong so just talk to me...it doesn't have to be right now but let me make one thing very clear...if you don't want to sleep in the same bed as me then I can just move back to my parents house and not have to feel the pain of rejection from my mate that I felt last night."

Her words hit me at the core, my entire world tilted on its side...would my mate really leave me?

"Cassandra...-"

"You're late remember." She cut me off angrily. "I love you Dean, with everything I have in me, but please try and remember I'm your mate."

I nodded and then kissed her hair before I left because I truly didn't know what else to do. I wanted to be with her and console her but I also have a pack to run. I got into my car (a new Mercedes I had purchased because my old car had been totaled and this one was more 'practical') and hit my steering wheel.

There was no way I'd be able to sit in on a meeting about boring ass zoning bullshit when all I have is Cassandra and her look of sadness and disappointment filling my head.

I got out of my car and ran back inside.

"Fuck my meeting," I said as I took her into my arms. "I'm sorry my love...I'm sorry I haven't been putting you first, I love you more than life itself...you are my world but I guess I haven't exactly been worth of your love..."

As clothes was removed we each got something we had been needing, time together.

The feeling of being with my mate as one was surpassed by nothing else and my wolf and I both knew what we had to do...it wasn't planned and it definitely could've been more romantic.

"I love you so much Cassandra."

I felt as her body tightened itself around me as I bit down and fully claimed my mate as mine, my Cassandra, my Luna.

Afterward I felt as her body went limp and knew I had to care for her.

"Are you alright my love?" I asked after I got us both into bed.

A lazy sort of grin filled her face as she nodded cutely.

"I've wanted to so do that for so long." I confessed proudly.

We laid in each others arms for a moment longer before she spoke up. "We should get up."

"You should rest" I protested, "but you're right I do need to get up...I've already missed one meeting and it'd be pretty irresponsible to miss anymore today."

Knowing we both had shit to do we got up, got redressed then I had the burden of having to tell her goodbye again.

My second meeting of the day wasn't as official but when I walked into the restaurant I felt completely unsure.

"There's the man of the hour." He smiled.

I returned his smile with my own before I embraced him in a brotherly fashion, "how's it going Jax?"

"So you're the one who wanted an 'official sit down'...here I am, so what's going on?"

Before the waiter could even bring us a drink we were already talking business. "Well I guess I'll cut right to the chase...you know I'm the new Alpha of this pack, at the end of the day I need a Beta...and i'd like to extend that offer to you."

He smirked and nodded, "you know I won't agree just like that...you'll have to give me a reason to stay."

I knew it wouldn't be easy, but he was the best candidate I could think of.

"Of course."