(Please bare with me, this is my AU and they are wacky uwu!! RAHHH MURICAAAA🖕)

1845 in a nutshell:

Mexico: HEY HEY HEY

USA: oh em gee, it's my southern NEIGHbore, got any rats

Mexico: take my child—

Texas: yeehaw😔

MUrica: GLADLY, *guves mecicxo monies*

Mexico: *runs away cutely*

Texas: ERMMM.... HELP ME!! SOMEONE EHLPPPPP!!!

america: shush, imagine having red white and blue and a star on ur flag 💀💀

Texas: wow you could never 💀

America: i'm ganna tresure you my new oil supply- i mean my new amazing son

Texas: *bites*

america: AHHHH—-

Nevada's problem:

Nevada: HURHEUHEUEBUEHUEHEUURHEUHRURHURHRUHRURHRURHRY

California: bro get outta vegas 🤯🤯

Nevada: what happens in vegas, stays in vegas.

California: yea but—

Nevada: WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS. STAYS. IN. VEGAS.
*chokes California*
Everyone: 😨

Tornado alley 🥵🥵🥵:

Oklahoma: AAHHHHHH DAD HELP!!
*gets attacked violently by tornado*

America: UHH YA I WOULD LIKE SO HELP BUT I GOT A LIL ERRAND TO RUN SO YA-
*leaves*

Kansas: DONT WORRY I GOTCHU!!!

*grabs a lasso and grabs the Tornado*

Tornado: OMG! KYAAA OWO!!!

*kills it*

Oklahoma: OH MAE GAWD TYYYYYY POOKIE

Kansas: WE GOTCHU BACK

*does super cool trick with lasso*

Burning problem:

California: ugh its so hot here... yall wont ever understand 😤😤😤

Florida, New mexico, texas, alabama, arkansas, hawaii: ARE WE A JOKE TO YOU??🤬

Arizona: *catches on fire cutely and dies*
😍
America: *doesnt care too busy eating monopoly money*