Cassandra

I paced up and down my room feeling more confused than ever.

It all started when I got home from school and the same thing happened with Eva again.

Mom had tried talking to her but she wouldn't answer any of her question's.

It was like she was broken.

I missed my happy, energetic sister who always had a bright smile on her face and wanted this sad, mopey girl to go away.

Then, once that was over I started to text Bella again.

I hadn't seen her since we talked on the phone about how James asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes.

She was super weird about it and then the call ended.

I assumed that maybe her phone died so I waited a while for her to call back but she never did.

I had the fleeting idea that maybe she had hung up on me but I dismissed it and shoo'ed it away just as fast as it came.

Bella was my best friend and she would never just hang up on me for no reason...

Right?

Speaking of Bella, I still haven't figured out what was up with her and James the other day.

And I needed to find out fast, Can't have my best friend and my boyfriend at each other's throats all the time, can I now?

After I finished all my work I had some free time so, I texted her.

I waited a couple of minutes but got no response so I texted again.

This happened over and over again until it got to the point where I was just spamming Bella in the hopes of getting an answer.

And I did.

But it wasn't one that I had expected.

After around my 30th text (I was aiming for 50 before I would give up) Bella sent something shocking.

She typed, "We" are done.

There was even an angry emoji to go along with it!

Which leads back to why I'm pacing up and down like a crazy person.

'Why would Bella say that?'

'Did I do something wrong?'

'What is up with everyone nowadays???'

All these thoughts buzzed around my brain and made it hard to think.

I and Bella had been so close ever since we were practically in diapers.

And I couldn't bear the thought of her being mad at me. It hurt too much.

Just as my head was about to explode, my phone dinged.

I nosedived onto my bed with only 1 question circling around in my head.

'IS IT BELLA?!?'

I picked it up and immediately went to my messages but the tab that had Bella's name was empty.

Instead, the blue dot that showed my latest message notifications was on an unknown number.

Curious, I tapped on it to see what it said.

I saw a:

From the other end

Feeling a bit confused, I messaged back,

Now I was really starting to freak out.

'How does this stranger know my name???'

So I cautiously sent back,

I let out a breath of relief.

After recovering from my mini panic attack, I texted back,

I felt myself making a face.

'Ew, how did Eric get my number? I don't think I've ever even texted him before?'

I thought about it for a second.

'Nah, too much work.' I concluded.

'Ugh,' I mentally uttered in my head.

'Maybe this is a bad idea...' I thought to myself.

'Buuuuutttttt... since he's my boyfriend now I should probably give him a chance' I also thought.

After a bit of hesitation, I decided on giving him a chance.

I debated on saying bye to him but I decided against it.

'I don't wanna seem like a clingy girlfriend' I thought to myself but really, it was because I wasn't really up for texting him anymore.

Just as we rounded up our conversation, my phone dinged again.

I felt my heart leap.

Praying it was Bella this time, I clicked on it but it was just a scam message.

I rolled my eyes, blocked the number and deleted the message.

"I guess I was going on a date with James now?" I asked myself in my empty room.

'Let's see how this'll turn out.'

♡♡♡

I ran my fingers through my just blow dried hair.

James was gonna pick me up any minute and I still hadn't picked out anything to wear!

I was able to narrow it down to 3 different outfits.

The first one was a striped long-sleeve shirt that I would tuck into a floral skirt with some black flats.

Yes, a bit dressy but James could be taking me to a fancy restaurant or something.

The next outfit had a faded green jacket, a plain, white long sleeve and light blue jeans with some converse sneakers.

It definitely leaned more on the casual side but it still looked good so it was acceptable.

The last outfit was a grey, cropped sweater, black leggings and the same boots I wore when I told Andrew that James was my boyfriend.

This outfit was not only cute, but it was comfortable and I liked it a lot.

After going through all the possibilities, I decided on outfit #3

I threw everything on, put my hair up in a cute messy bun and, like always, had my glasses to finish off the look.

I decided I would go on the date with just a touch of makeup, Not that I really wanted to impress anyone though.

Just a bit of foundation and concealer, a smidge of shiny, silver eye shadow and some light pink lip gloss.

I examined myself in the mirror.

'If only Andrew were here to see me right now' I thought to myself.

I knew it was wrong, but even though I was in a relationship with James, Andrew still had my heart.

I zipped down the stairs to see Mom cooking dinner in the kitchen.

"Hey Cass, Where are you going, looking all dolled up like that?" She asked curiously.

I cringed.

'Dang it!' I muttered to myself.

I had totally forgotten to tell Mom I would be going out yesterday!

I looked up at her with a wide (fake) smile plastered on my face.

"Hi, Mom!" I exclaimed enthusiastically "I'm just going to see... uh... Lily for a group project we're working on."

I felt my stomach start to churn and knot up into a tight ball.

I absolutely hated lying. Especially to mom.

Mom raised one of her perfectly shaped eyebrows.

"Oookay" Mom said, not buying a thing. "Just be back by dinner, which is in an hour or two."

'Not like I'll need it' I thought to myself but was able to bite my tongue and keep my mouth shut.

"Sure!" I smiled at mom. Just as I was about to head out I added, "And who even says 'dolled up' anymore?"

I heard her chuckle a bit at my statement as I shut the door.

I stood outside my house for a while, waiting for James to show up.

I kicked a small pebble off my porch with the tip of my shoe.

I messed around with my phone.

I even started counting the cars that passed by our house.

After that, I checked the time on my phone.

30 minutes had passed.

"He's late," I muttered to myself, dully.

Just as I was about to head back inside, assuming that I had been stood up, I noticed a figure nearing our house in the distance.

I let go of the door handle and waited a bit longer so that I would be able to decipher who the person heading down our street was.

And boy was I surprised when I saw James (finally) strolling towards my house!

When he saw me on my porch, his pace quickened.

I decided I would meet him there halfway so we could just get going already.

We met up in the middle of the sidewalk.

He had the same stupid grin on his face from when he asked me to be his girlfriend.

"Hi!" He greeted me cheerfully, ignorant to what time it was.

He was wearing a black jacket, grey sweat pants and a red, button-up shirt with his glasses on like usual.

He did not pull that outfit off well at all.

I folded my arms and scowled at James.

"You're late," I told him, crossed.

With a truly dumbfounded expression on his face, he pulled out his own phone to check what time it was.

When he finally figured it out, he looked back at me and said, "Huh. I guess I was."

I felt the anger in me starting to boil but I was able to keep it down to a simmer.

My hands unconsciously went up to my hair but I forgot that it was in a bun and there was nothing to comb my fingers through so I tried stuffing my fingers into my pockets but yet again, surprise surprise, I was wearing leggings so I didn't even have pockets.

Feeling awkward now, I just kept my hands in front of me, hoping they wouldn't embarrass me any more than they already had.

After we had walked in silence for a while I piped up "So, how do I look?" Doing an up-down motion towards my body.

I knew that at this point I was practically fishing for compliments but it was the only thing I could think of to break up the tension.

He took a good look at me, pretty much examing every piece of clothing that had been draped onto my body and said "Eh." While shrugging his shoulders.

What came out of my mouth next was a cross between a scoff and a gasp.

What do you call that; a sasp?

I worked so hard on this outfit (kind of) and all I get is an 'eh'?????

I folded my arms and grumbled to myself as we walked in silence again.

As we walked, the sun got lower and lower in the sky and the air began to chill.

I felt myself shiver 'It's getting cold' I thought to myself. 'I should've worn my jacket.'

I guess James noticed because he read my mind and blurted out "Oh! Uhh... you look kinda cold. Do you wanna wear my jacket?"

I felt my heartbeat speed up.

'Oh no,' I thought. 'I can't handle this much cliché, it's just too much!'

"N-no! I'm fine please don-" I started, my words getting stuck in my mouth but before I could even finish he had practically thrown the jacket at me and watched me creepily to make sure that I was putting it on.

I tried smiling at him to show a bit of gratitude but it came out as a grimace as I wrapped the jacket around me.

Even though it was warm, it smelled like a mix of cheap cologne and Cheetos. 'Ugh,' I thought to myself while suppressing a groan. Things were not off to a good start.

We kept walking down the sidewalk in silence, but once we turned the corner, a wave of realization hit me

'I think I know where we're going now!' As my spirits started to lift.

If we kept going straight and turned left at the next corner, we would eventually get to Bene Cibo, the fanciest Italian restaurant in town.

I didn't get to go there often because of how expensive their food was but they served the best pasta you've ever tasted. Especially their Fettuccine Alfredo with shrimp and lobster sautéed inside. It was absolutely delicious!

My mouth was watering just thinking about it.

I thought about asking him but I decided I would keep the question to myself. 'When he's ready to tell me, he'll tell me' I concluded.

'I definitely should've worn the skirt outfit' as I smiled to myself.

Sometime later, we got to the point where we were supposed to turn left to get to Bene, but instead, for some reason, James went right.

I paused for a second, feeling a bit confused but followed behind him, nevertheless.

When I finally caught up, I gave James a questioning look but he just smiled back in response and kept walking, leaving me more confused than ever.

And then, finally, after what felt like forever, we got to our destination.

My jaw dropped when I realized where we were and James just started beaming like a kid on Christmas.

I couldn't believe that our first date was being held at McDonald's of all places!

While James ran into the popular fast-food company, I stood outside, feeling shook with my head slightly cocked to the side. 'Is he joking?' I felt like slapping my forehead. 'He better be joking! I hate this joke soooo much.'

But can you blame me? I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that we were at McDonald's.

After a couple of seconds with me still standing alone in front of the famous Mickey D's, James came and poked his head out of the door.

"You coming or what?" He asked impatiently

'Definitely not a joke' I thought as my lips pursed into a thin line.

I just crossed my arms and nodded my head swiftly in return as I followed him inside.

The place was buzzing and packed with snotty nosed 3-year-olds whining to their mommies about the toy they got in their happy meals (like usual).

We walked up to the counter to order and there was a girl around our age, give or take a couple of years standing there.

She had her extremely gothic look on display from her shiny nose ring to her dark makeup on her pale skin and long, dyed black bangs. The only splash of colour on her was the dark, plum coloured shirt she had on that read clearly in big bold white letters, 'I have no soul', a broken heart oozing out black goo underneath the words. 'Definitely not child friendly,' I thought to myself with a frown.

The girl examined me from my head to my toes, chewing her gum annoyingly loud, blew and popped the bubble in my face and said snarkily with her arms crossed "So what do you want?

I looked at her, the disbelief evident on my face.

Rude much, am I right?

I was about to put her in her place when James interrupted me.

"Joy! Hey, how are things at home?"

I looked at James.

"You know her?" I asked him. Things were getting even more confusing by the second.

This so-called 'Joy' (not that she looked like it though) piped up for him. "He's here so often, all the employees know him." She paused for a second "Especially me." She added.

"Yup!" James said proudly like this was a good thing.

I stared at the 2 of them not saying a word.

"Anyway," James turned back and facing Joy. "I'll have the usual, Big Mac, large fries and a giant coke"

He glanced at me "Do you want anything?"

I tucked back a stray strand of hair that had found its way out of my bun and I mumbled: "Uh... a medium fries is good."

Joy clicked multiple buttons into the cash register and we waited for her to finish.

"Ok," she finished with zero enthusiasm. "That'll be $17.69 plus tax."

James started fishing in his pocket for extra change but after emptying his pockets for the second (!) time he started to blush and whispered to me "I forgot to bring the money."

I glared at him 'How do you to forget to bring money on a date!?!' I silently screamed to myself.

"You're lucky I keep $20 in my case!" I hissed as I started to peel the case off my phone.

Just like I told him, the $20 was sitting neatly tucked away in the middle of my case.

I handed it to Joy. "And keep the change" I told her. I did not feel like hoisting around a bunch of coins on our walk home.

Joy took it from me and said to the 2 of us "Your meal will be ready in five." And gave me the receipt.

Then she motioned towards the waiting isle where we could stand but I told her "We'll just sit, thanks." while grabbing James's arm and dragging him to the nearest table booth.

When we sat down he said with a smirk "Well someone's a bit feisty today."

'Duh YOU THINK???' I thought but I just rolled my eyes and replied back, unamused "Whatever. Let's just wait for the food."

We sat there, the silence wrapping around us like some strange, unsettling blanket but I could feel him staring at me intensely.

I pretended not to notice and I glued my eyes on the exit sign ahead of me.

Just when it was starting to get weird, I glanced back at him and asked, with a bit of sass, "Is there something in my teeth? Why do you keep looking at me?"

To that, his face turned bright red and he looked down at the table.

"Um, sorry," James muttered. And things went back to being quiet.

After a while, James spoke.

"S-So uhh..." James started while stammering and still looking down. "I w-was w-wondering if y-you would... um..."

I rolled my eyes at him, even though I was a bit flattered at his nervous state and exclaimed "James! Just spit it out!"

He looked at me wide-eyed "Oh, ok..." He took in a shaky breath and squeezed his eyes shut. "Cass... I was wondering if you would go to the snowflake dance with me in 2 weeks."

Now it was my turn to go wide-eyed.

I hadn't really forgotten about the snowflake dance, I just didn't really think I would have to go to it until now.

One side of me was saying 'You should totally go because James is your boyfriend now' but another side shrieked, 'This is a terrible idea! Look at how this date is turning out right now. Who's to say the same thing won't happen at the dance?'

With my lips still pursed in thought, I fretted. "I don't know James..."  But then he grabbed my hand.

"I'm begging you," James pleaded. "You're the coolest girl I've ever met and I don't know what I would do if you said no!" And then he did the unthinkable.

He gave me puppy dog eyes.

Now how am I supposed to say no to that?

I sighed because the same part of me was still screaming 'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Don't do it!!!' But I answered him with, "Ok, sure."

His face exploded with happiness and he was smiling from ear to ear.

"Thank you Thank you Thank you, Cassie!!!!" He effused and came over to wrap me into a giant bear hug.

Definitely surprised at this new show of emotions, I patted his back awkwardly in response.

He backed up and grinned. "I promise I will be the best boyfriend from now on!" He said it so happy that I knew he had to have been telling the truth.

"You better," I muttered back playfully.

And then he kissed me.

For real.

On the lips.

I couldn't really do anything because it happened so fast but there we were, making out in front of everyone in the middle of McDonald's.

It wasn't like I hated it though. It wasn't anything too... weird and he was actually a pretty good kisser. I even kissed him back a little, I think. It was... nice.

When he finally pulled away he said in a low voice "Sorry... I didn't mean to, I-" but I shut him up.

"It's ok." I smiled at him, genuinely this time. "I liked it."

He mimicked my expression and said back, "me too."

Just when we were about to go in for another round, some old guy, in his 50's hollered at us "Get a room!" from 2 rows down.

James blushed and yelled a "sorry!" Back to the guy and when he looked back at me we had a good laugh about it.

We talked for the rest of the date, trying to get to know each other a bit better and I realized that when you actually tried to get to know him, James was actually a super interesting person!

But at the same time, something was bugging me.

I don't know how to explain it, but it felt like a mix of guilt, betrayal and... I don't know, wrongness mixed together into one big, weird ball of emotions.

And I had no clue what to do about it.