My great-nanny has been in the hospital on and off for the past year or two. Now she's in the hospital again. We called her this morning and she sounded so different that my dad didn't think it was her. He had a conversation with her thinking that he was a completely different person and she invited him to dinner. WE LIVE IN A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PROVINCE FROM HER. I thought it sounded like her but i believed him when he said it wasn't, because I wanted so bad for it not to be my strong nanny who kept a garden until she was 90. I had my doubts but I was just so relieved it wasn't her that I kept them buried. Turns out it was her, and I might never see her in person again. The plan was to visit her for her 95th birthday. She might not even make it that long. I can't lose another person without seeing them or even saying goodbye again. I also recently lost two neighbors who were really important parts of my life, and my grandpa who died pretty unexpectedly and who I don't have many in-person memories of that I'll get to keep, I was so little when I made them. I don't want to forget her. I don't want to forget ANY of them. I don't know what to do or who to talk to, and I just need it to stop.