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I Need to Forget

This is something that I thought might help me from mimotakuri . I won't be using real names, if the person does perhaps read this then I'm sure they'll know who they are.

Dear LoLo,
Where do I begin with this. I feel the most hurt by this all. I feel like it was all my fault, but then again you were so ignorant to see how much I did care and how much I did for you and all you did was stab me in the back. Three times you did, but the first two I took the wounds like I deserved them, but I realized I didn't, and moved on - I wanted to be your friend because you meant a lot to me.
The third time was a mess, our friends didn't make it better. But you put people under the bus for your own guilt to not be seen. To say that I was the victim of it all, that I was controlling them. I wasn't. They cared for me because of your actions that you pulled. I didn't tell them to stick up for me, not at all. I didn't want them to stick up for me. You called me weak, a twig, and you watched me fall. I couldn't bring myself back up after those words from the past. After all I've done for you, it didn't mean anything at all.
But now I see you in every class it seems. The universe is cursing me. I try not to acknowledge but all I can think is "does she hate me after all of it?".

I know I will never see you again and I need to accept that. I need to move on and realize that you've done wrong, not me. Even if I feel full of grief. Here's something I need to forget. So here's my farewell to you, even if it takes a bit.

~Farewell~

Dear Fool,
You were my childhood friend and you came back into my life. When we were kids I had a crush on you and you had one on me. We were soon separated and I was devastated because you were my only friend. Six years later we reunite and we had a relationship, but when I didn't feel comfortable and ended it because we hardly knew each other you decided it was all my fault and didn't want to be my friend. But I wasn't comfortable just because of our relationship, I was uncomfortable because you talked about the girl you're in love with to your crush or girlfriend or whatever I was to you. Did you just use me?
I did like you, I wanted to make it work, but I needed time, but you weren't patient, and you said you'd do all these things yet you didn't. But such is my love-life with many I've been with.
On that trip you flirted your way back into my mind when I wanted to see you as a friend. Then you asked me not even a day after we became friends again. I said no. You got upset and changed. You treated me like I was nothing, like everything was staged. So is it true I was bait for jealousy for your lover? And here's my farewell to you, for messing with my mind and heart like they all do.

~see ya~

Dear Brookie,

I don't even want to remember you. I don't want to talk about the things you did to me. The things that scarred me. The things that make me shiver and lose my trust, like the other have up above. All I have to say to you is, thanks for showing me the ugly in people, how I was used. I was always used. I did trust you, you were my best friend and I loved you, but then it all was a lie. Thanks I guess and a goodbye to you.

~goodbye~

Dear Rucko,
Who are you? We were best friends. My heart flutters and people tease me about it always. We had something and I wanted it to work, but I was afraid, afraid of what might happen. You didn't do anything you said you would..And the expected happened; the thing I would dread; the thing I didn't want to happen. Hurt. You called me all these things. But I didn't want to lose you. I didn't want to miss you, but I did. I wanted to fix it. I did. But now, my heart still hurts and pangs each time you say something.
Like today, you teased and told me I needed something. But was it a tease? Did you call me ugly? Am I all the things you tease and insult me with? I can't help but hurt and think so much of it. But this isn't a goodbye to you. This is a see you later, because you're still here and i want you to stay, I just need to figure out whether you're some feeling I need to rid of.

~~~

(Will be added if need be..)

And I did give you cred because it really helps.:3

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