"Jimin?" I ask, sounding a little dumb. Like maggots drilled holes into all the important parts of my brain and it has made me physically stupid. "Yeah, so I requested that he's in our group because he's my roommate. Also, he can distract my sister." he smiles.

Oh my gosh, all of this is just working together perfectly. I don't understand the universe right now, for the longest it wasn't in my favor and all of a sudden the universe is like, "Here BB I got you BB, be happy BB." Like.. skin me and turn it into jerky.

My imagery is just.. half of the time I wonder if I'm high. High off life beach, yes.

"Ah." I smile up at him. "So hopefully I'll have you all to myself." he smiles wide at me. I look into his eyes, "Do you want me that bad?" I chuckle. He slowly nods, "Jungkook." I start. "Yes?" his eyes look at me eagerly. "When did you have your first kiss?" I ask him. His pretty brown eyes look over my face and they seem to sparkle.

"Freshman year, me and this girl never dated but we kissed. She said my lips were too soft and it felt like she was kissing a girl, that she needed a masculine boy. Which made no sense because I was still a child my freshman year and I don't know what she meant by it felt like she was kissing a girl." he laughs and I look at his lips.

"You kissed other girls though, right? That's why you're so good." I then look at his eyes. "I mean, yeah." He mumbles, not sounding very pleased with what he's replying to. I wonder why he doesn't seem happy about it. "But in my defense, I was trying to get over you." I look at him shocked. "Why would you need to?" he shrugs.

"Having Jimin tell me shit for so long and just negative thoughts played a huge role in it. I just always thought you liked other guys." I slowly shake my head. "Jimin is just honestly really dumb, he doesn't know anything about girls. Neither about relationships, you shouldn't have listened to him. You should've just came to me." I grin at him.

"I know, and I regret that. It would've been sooner, much sooner that I would've confessed to you." I let out a breath, "I was so scared about how you felt that I never even thought of confessing to you." I look at him, "Why?" He asks. I shrug, "Your sister and just fear, you're so popular that I thought you didn't know I existed." I confess.

"I'm literally not even popular." I stare at him with a straight face. "Okaaay okay maybe just a little bit." He raises his shoulder. "Literally all the girls die over you." He rolls his eyes and it's honestly so hot. "Yeah, only for my looks not for other things. Like my talent or skills." I nod, "No true, that's why they annoy me because they don't know you like I do."

He smiles and looks at my lips, making me close them together quickly. "Was I really your first kiss, honestly?" he asks, causing me to blush. "Yes." I tell him right away. He lets out a breath and looks at my lips more intensely, "I wish I saved mine for you." I shake my head, "Why not?" he asks surprised.

"I like learning from you, I like that you show me and guide me." I bite my lip and I feel my heart racing. I'm about to confess a fantasy of mine. "I've just always wanted you to be the dominant while I'm submissive." I say, he stares at me for a few seconds before his hand gently pulls the back of my head.

Our lips collide together and he dominates me like every single fantasy I've had about him over the years. I gasp when he picks me up by my bare thighs and sits me where he sat before on my bed, pulling himself in between my legs. It was like my words had ignited something in Jungkook, it seemed that the steam rolled out and we were back at the pace we were last night.

Slow, I like it a lot.

He slowly directed me with his lips, hypnotizing me. "Fyi." I whisper and he lets his lips hover over mine as he waits, "I love how soft your lips are." I slowly open my eyes to meet his, a smile grows on his face and he lifts my chin with his thumb. "My lips are only yours." he says, making the pit of my stomach want to explode.

"They've always been." he says even quieter as if I wasn't supposed to hear, but I do anyways. Always? Before I can ask he kisses me again and he gently grabs my hands that grip my skirt. I didn't even notice that I was, what the actual fuck. He wraps my arms around his own neck and I gently pull him, I want to be pressed against him.

I want to feel his heart pound against mine. His arms wrap tight around me, he never pushes himself on top of me or forces me on my back. Everything is so natural that I feel like we're continuing the kiss from last night, which I don't mind at all! His lips slowly pull off of mine, "Is it okay if we just lay here?" he asks.

I nod quickly and he let's go of me and joins me in bed, he pulls me against him. He lays his head on my pillow and looks at me, "It's crazy how comfortable I am with you." he tells me. "We've known each other basically since we were little." he smiles. "Yeah, but like.. being with you." I feel his fingers touch my hair.

I set my hand on his chest and I hover my mine over his. "Strangely enough I feel the same way, I always thought that if I was with you I'd be a nervous wreck. But I feel so normal with you, like we've been together for a long time." he smiles even bigger, his hand running down my back making me arch it.

He leaves his hand on my back. "Tell me all your secrets." he whispers. "Only if you tell me yours." I chuckle. "Oh but of course, one for one.", "How far back?" I ask. He hums, "Recent ones." I try not to gulp, Jae and Jimin. "I tell my cat all the dreams I have about you." he raises an eyebrow, intrigued. "You have many dreams about me?" I blush and nod.

"I have some about you too." his fingers massage my back. I grin, "So Kevin knows everything about you." I nod. "Lucky guy." he laughs. I look at his face. "For the longest I tried to get your number from my sisters phone." I smile, "Why didn't you ever just ask?" he grins. "I was too shy and scared to ask." I smile at his cuteness.

"I don't bite." I chuckle. "Yeah, I know." I then feel really emotional. "Jungkook, can I tell you.." I don't finish and he nods. "I want to know everything." I look down at my hand on his chest.

OH MY GOSH, there's his nipple. I see it right through his shirt! Why didn't I notice this before? YUNA! it's not the time right now to admire his chest eyes, okay? Those lovely- stop.

"I've liked you ever since we were little, even when you'd put boogers in my hair and smeared mud on my clothes." he stares at me for a few seconds, "You have?" I nod, "And I always tried to hide it because I didn't want Jae to find out." he stares at me again and I blush really hard. "Why didn't I..." he whispers. "What did you say?" I lean forward.

"Why didn't I tell you earlier, I hate myself for it." I feel my toes sweating, "I've liked you since the day I first saw you." I feel joy fill every cell in my body, I can't stop smiling. "Really?" he nods with a new smile on his face. "So all those times I saw you looking at me, it wasn't apart of my imagination?" he grins at me and his hand runs up my back.

"No." he says. I smile wide and I hug his neck, he wraps his arms around me. "I'm never sure about a lot of things, like how the universe works and how fate works. But the one thing I've always been sure about.. is you." Before he can say a word I press my lips against his, words can not perfectly describe how happy I am.

He doesn't seem to want to let me go, my fingers run into his hair. We kiss for a few seconds more before I slowly pull away from him, when I open my eyes slightly he's already looking at me. He smiles and I smile back, I run my hands down his body and I hug him as I press my head against his side.

Jungkook and I relax together, talk about memories we've had together when we were younger. I then hear a beep of a phone and I assume that it's his. He digs into his pocket and takes out his phone, he groans. "Ah yep, I've gotta go baby." my whole body tingles. It's like he didn't even think about what he said, he looks at me and smiles.

The smile I show him in return is a lot bigger than his, "I'm guessing you liked it?" I nod and we both sit up. "Well, I like cuddling with you so I really want to do this again soon." I nod again, but quicker. He smiles and sets his thumb on my chin, he pecks my lips and I set my hand on his face not wanting him to go.

He kisses me longer, almost like he's never going to see me again. He leaves me breathless, his tongue touches my lip before he pulls away. My lips tingle as I suck them into my mouth, he smiles lifts my chin a little higher. Looking into my eyes and smiles, we get off my bed and I walk him to the front door. He puts on his shoes and I hold his coat.

Kevin comes up to Jungkook and rubs himself on the back of his leg. "Woh, he scared me." Jungkook chuckles as he bends down and pets Kevin. Kevin is all over Jungkook, but unfortunately he can't stay. Kevin has approved of the infamous Jungkook that I always speak of, that is clear to me.

"Bye dude." Jungkook gently pats Kevin's little head that looked even smaller under Jungkook's hand. "Okay, so I'll see you tomorrow. We giving you a ride there?" he asks. "I don't know, Jae never asked." he slowly nods."Well then we'll see you at the airport tomorrow.", "Okay then." it's like something gets into me when I tug on the front of his shirt and I kiss his lips.

He smiles wide, I look up at him. "I like this a lot." he whispers. I chuckle and blush, "I'll keep that in mind." he smiles at me one last time as he pulls on his coat. "Bye." he says sweetly. "Bye." I reply. Then I watch him walk away. UGH! That ass is so nice, I want to just grip and smack his butt. Then I think about his nipple, that was a nice nipple.

The nicest I've ever seen honestly. "Meow." I turn around, "Do you like?" I ask him. He walks up to me and rubs himself against my leg. I close the door and lock it, "I thought you would, but just to tell you.. you can tell anyone not even eomma. We would get in trouble and you don't want that, right? That would be bad." Kevin looks up at me with no expression and walks away.

"Kevin, please. You know how it is right? If you had a little girlfriend that came around, I wouldn't tell. You're just mad that he couldn't stay." he meows in response, I walk up to him. "Okay, thank you for making it clear. I know you liked him, he's nice huh? He's sweet." I see him sit down before my bedroom door, he meows in response again.

"Yes, he will hopefully come over again soon and you can lay with him also." I nod. He just stares at me, "Kevin, now is not the time to ask if we will keep it PG when we are here alone. We are teenagers, who knows when it will even get sexual." he blinks before he meows. "Yeah, that's true you know how I feel about him. It's not sexual all the time."

I walk up to him fully and pick him up. "You just want your human to be happy, don't you? Kevin." he purrs and I smile, he likes Jungkook because he makes me happy. "Kevin." I start as I walk over to my bed and I lay with him. He purrs aggressively and I know he's listening. "It feels like I've been with Jungkook for almost all of my life.. like we didn't agree just last night."

I pet him, "Like we agreed a long time ago." I look down at him, his little eyes are closed. "Is that odd?" I ask him and he presses his head against my hand. I grin and close my eyes, feeling relaxed. It's as if being with Jungkook today relaxed my body and made me feel like I'm on cloud 9. I think about all the things I could possibly tell Jungkook on this trip to Paris.

Something more about myself, he'd make fun of me if he knew that I have crazy thoughts about him. Thoughts that might make others laugh and maybe make others question my state. I feel like the best way to approach my feelings and letting everything go, is to trust Jungkook.

That he actually wants me, he isn't just telling me what I want to hear, I just hope that he genuinely likes and wants me.. and he isn't planning to use and hurt me. But I know Jungkook isn't like that. The only thing that scares me is that the way he is.. can be completely different than what he's capable of. I won't let these thoughts go any further, I'll have faith about him.

But no promises about the end and pain is inevitable, pain demands to be felt.

**

When I wake up from my nap, Kevin is nowhere to be found and I sit up. "Eomma?" I call. "Yes? You're awake?" she calls from the kitchen. I stretch in bed before I stand up, "Yes, I'm awake." I tell her as I step out of my room. "Help me with dinner, please." she says and I walk over to wash my hands. "Yuna, be honest with me." my mother's tone is very serious.

"Of course." I turn to her as I dry my hands on the kitchen hand towel. "Did you have a boy over?" it feels like my spine is about to snap in half and my legs will collapse. "Yuna." she says sternly. "Yes." I respond. "Who?" I refold the towel and place it in the correct place. "Jungkook." she raised an eyebrow as she chops vegetables.

"What was he doing here?" she asks. "He wanted to tell me his feelings." to my surprise she smiles wide. "He confessed?" I nod quickly. I can't believe that I'm lying to my mother, for fuck's sake. Well, I'm just switching events around. But is it still lying if it actually happened? Just didn't happen today? "How do you feel?" she questions eagerly.

My mother knows how I feel about Jungkook, she's always known. "I'm honestly still in shock." I confess. She smiles and I blush. "I'm sorry that I'm butting in, it's just that the neighbor called me because she saw you with someone." nosey old lady. "Just from now on message me if Jungkook comes over, I want to know." she tells me.

"He came over unexpectedly, I guess he was too shy to come up with me or tell me in an opened area." she looks down at the chopped vegetables, "So you confessed back." she smiles as she keeps looking down. "Yes, he was actually very shocked." she chuckles and I lean against the counter, waiting for her to give me instructions on what to do for dinner.

"Many boys are just clueless." I shake my head. "I was actually trying my hardest to hide it from everyone." I confess. She looks up at me, "Don't tell me." I cross my arms loosely over my chest, not in a defensive way. More like in a defeated way. "Okay then I won't." she clicks her tongue as she moves all the chopped vegetables to a bowl.

"You know.. that girl is so selfish, all she does is think about herself." I shake my head again. "No eomma, it's not that." she sets the knife down and looks at me as she sets her hand on her hip. "Then what is it? It can't possibly be because she loves her brother, she doesn't want anyone to have him."

"I just personally think that if she knew that I liked Jungkook, I'd be like all the other girls at school who follow him around like flies." she doesn't say a word to me, for a long time and it makes me feel like she's disappointed in me.

"But you're not like those other girls, you've known him all your life. You know who he actually is and you even liked him when he went through that awkward stage. All those girls only started to pay attention to him because he hit puberty really hard and has a handsome face." she shakes her head and turns to stir the noodles that are on the stove, also checks on the rice in the steamer.

"Those girls like him for the wrong things, and you like him for who he is. Now, if Jae knew and understood the difference between you and those other girls.. then she's a really good best friend." I bite my lip.

"She has already physically told me that she would be mad if I liked Jungkook. Anyone who watches her talk about me being with him, you just see the instant discomfort and anger to the thought of it." my mother lets out a loud sigh. "That girl." she mumbles. "I wonder if she thinks you're not good enough for Jungkook." that never crossed my mind.

"Do you honestly believe that she may think that I'm not good enough for him?" she hums, "From the sounds of it, it's most likely. I mean, have you ever expressed feelings that makes her think you don't like him?" my mouth goes dry. "Yes." I tell her. "Why Yuna?" she asks. "Because Eomma, I'm scared of losing Jae as my best friend."

She slowly nods, "What have you decided with her brother today then?" I bite my lip. "That I want to be with him, but I don't want Jae to find out.", "So keeping a secret.", "Y-Yes." she lets out another breath.

"Yuna, is this really the way you want to go about your friendship with Jae? You've known her since you were just booger eating babies, and it's come to hiding your love for her brother from her." Should I tell her about both Jae and Jimin?

"Yuna, I know that you really care for Jae.. but if this is the type of friendship you end up having with her. Then I don't think that this is the best friendship you can have." This is one of the reasons I love talking to my mother about my issues because she tells me her honest opinion, and she talks to me as an adult.

"Thank you eomma." I tell her. "Yuna, you never need to thank me. I know that you will work this out respectfully, just know that whatever decisions you make isn't the end of the world." I smile at her and she finally gives me instructions on helping her for dinner. Not long after my father shows up and dinner is basically ready.

We all join each other at the table and talk about our day, of course I don't mention that Jungkook got his Jungkook scent all over my bed. Or that we kissed a lot and I took control twice and I felt glitter in my body. Instead I tell them all the boring things that happened, like class and how my meat was a little dry in my lunch today.

But the biggest conversation during dinner is the fact that tomorrow I leave to Paris. My father gave me very important safety rules, and my mother seems very anxious letting me go to a place far away from home, but I told her that I had to do this.

And she kind of knew what I meant, I want to be able to be.. an adult. To add on top of that I will be able to hang out closer with Jungkook.

Yummy.

**

I grab all my belongings making sure that they're in my bag. I also have my outfit ready for tomorrow morning so I'm not rushing too much to get ready. I hear my phone ring and I drop everything, running over to it. Before I answer, I make sure I don't sound out of breath. "Hello?" I greet. "Hey Yuna.", "What's up?" I sway back and forth.

"So.. my Eomma says we can give you a ride, since you're literally in the same building as us." I nod as if she can see me. "No problem Jae, thank you." she chuckles. "Of course." it goes silent and I already know this bitch wants to tell me what happened with Jimin. "What bitch?" I ask. "Well.. I wanted to tell you what happened with Jimin." of course.

"Oh, okay.. go for it." I sit back and wait for her to tell me. "Okay, well.. I texted Jimin to come over. But like.. COME OVER. You know, winky wonk and eggplant emoji.", "You texted him that?" I ask in shock. "No! But as an example." I chuckle. "Okay." she lets out a breath.

"And he took forever to get here, so I waited and when he finally got here.. I saw a side of him I've never seen before." I'm guessing he was being a hoe. "Oh?" I pretend I don't know what she's talking about. "He was on me like a hot tamale, I didn't even tell him that he was my first kiss." wow, Jae and I had our first kiss with our first love.

"Was it as amazing as you imagined?" I hear her squeal. "Yes, yes.. it was even better." I smile, I'm actually happy for her. "Oh my gosh Yuna, he is so talented. The second I let him into the apartment he was gentle and pressed me against the wall, kissing me and touching me." I can imagine how amazing that would be.

"Yuna.. you don't even understand, the way he rolled his body into me was like every fantasy I've ever had about him. It was hard to control myself, wanting to touch him everywhere.", "I can imagine how hard it was." she lets out a breath and chuckles. "Yeah, but then I think he knew he was my first so he taught me."

I bite my lip, I wonder if all guys are like that.. or maybe Jimin told Jungkook to do that with me. "It was like a dream and he tasted like sweet candy, his lips were just like taffy. And when I nibbled on his lip he got aggressive." I sit up, "Aggressive?" I ask worried.

"Not in the way you think, in a good way. He picked me up and wrapped my legs around him, and kissed all over my neck." I stare into space. "Wow." is all I can say. "But, then there was a knock at the door and it was Jungkook. He came home earlier than I originally thought than he would." my mouth goes dry.

"Jimin was off me in seconds and walked quickly to the bathroom. I fixed my clothes and let him in, he told me our parents messaged him that they were on their way home and he wanted to be ready for them.", "Did he find out? What happened with Jimin?" I ask.

"Well, he didn't suspect anything. And when Jimin came out he told Jungkook that he wanted to talk about something. Then they went to the kitchen and I went up to take a shower cause.. Jimin made me feel funny.", "Well, that's a relief." I tell her. "I know, I'm so happy today though." she tells me. "I can tell, I'm happy for you. Your parents are home now."

"Yes, we had dinner a while ago. And Jungkook smelt girlier than he usually does so I kinda feel like he was with that girl he likes but who knows." my stomach sinks. "Yeah." I mumble. "Oh dang, my parents are calling me downstairs. I'll text you in the morning.", "Okay, goodnight.", "Goodnight."

We end the call and I let my hand fall to my side that holds my phone. I wonder what Jimin mustered up to tell Jungkook, and I hope it was believable. Most importantly, I hope it's not about me. Jae seemed to have a pretty eventful day, it was pretty amazing from what I think. I wonder if Jungkook could ever be that way.

Can nice guys be that way too?

My mind goes off into many different thoughts wondering if Jungkook has ever done anything sexual, he had to right? Like, a guy like Jungkook can't be a virgin. There's absolutely no way. My mind drifts a little more and I think about Jungkook and I being in the same scenario as Jae and Jimin.

My back on the wall and Jungkook skin tight against me, his hips- I swallow saliva as my mouth goes dry. I'm just going to play games on my phone, I think that's a good idea.

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