For the last three years, I haven't let anyone invade my peaceful, quiet, secluded space, where it's only me who had made every choice confidently, instead of being dependent on someone else. I have kept everyone at a distance, distracted myself with work and schooling, and tried my best to avoid awful dating experiences.

They say, unrequited love, one-sided love, hopeless love are the best of their kind. It has no worry, no stress, no pressure to confess. But the truth is, the one who is going through it, only knows how much wound they need to bear inside their hearts.

As for me, I have lost count of how many days I've lived in denial, and it was both the best and the worst experiences of my life: feeling love and getting my heart broken--both for the first time. And at the end, I decided to confess and let go of the daily rejections.

And now I'm venturing out to seek for my painful past to dismiss the guilt for the very last time.

I whisk out of the cold dorm walls, looking back I see Jackie putting covers over my lifeless body. It's all dark and cold outside, but still I feel warm.

It feels so surreal to be out of my body and crossing the concrete boundaries of that small room for the first time. The mere idea of traveling so far makes goosebumps run all over my body.

A sudden rush of liberty and superiority overpowers me, and I find myself cracking a laugh so wistful that it scares me to bones. A few drops of those intractable tears kiss down my cheeks, I can feel them just fine, but I can't touch them, so I can't wipe them away.

An uncalled charge of the frigid northern wind sprints past me in some mystic hurry, making my messy long hair go tangled up and splay all over my face. I hold on to the hem of my white wrap dress downwards, so it saved me some dignity from the pervert wind.

Taking a deep breath, I start to soar higher up in the sky, so I can also laugh at the arrogant wind. As I glide through the stubborn flock of roaring clouds, I feel this bizarre power in my body, and let go of a long squeal as I feel winds rushing past my face.

I didn't realize how long I've been shouting like a mad woman, but then another voice puts a cease to my reckless actions, probably taking me back to my senses.

"Ah yeah, yeah! First time, I guess, no? But can you stop already? It's tipping me over the edge," that strange voice complains so nonchalantly that it shakes every craze off my body in a heartbeat.

This time I realize that I'm already over the stormy clouds, and the ambience here is serene and strangely divine.

Slowly I turn my head towards the source of the humanly voice at this ungodly arena, but only to get greeted with nothing as an unknown terror grips on to my soul.

"Who are you?", I manage to speak, putting my nerves aside. "What are you doing here? What do you want from me? Show yourself!"

And suddenly, an apparition emerges from right under my feet, making my jump back off and squeal out in fear.

"Ugh, I thought I'd come up from right there," he groans. "But these stupid clouds! Always here to pour water on my plans! Geez, seriously!"

By now, I muster up some courage to look up, and see a guy around my age standing before me, sleazily suited in suspenders and formals, and scratching the back of his neck in sheer annoyance and muttering something of which I've no idea.

"Sorry to scare you, birdie," he apologizes so blatantly that it doesn't sound like that he's being sincere. "Though I had no such intent."

"Who are you?" I repeat my question.

"Oh yeah! I almost forgot." He comes closer to me, right before my face, in just a second. "You were the annoying little one who just chewed my ears off. Geez, girl! Do you work for operas? And if so, tell me already!"

With him up this close, I try to move a little away from him, but instead stumbling on my own, I fall flat on my back inside the tickling clouds.

Hearing a loud suppressed snicker, I stick my head out of there, and shoot him a nasty look. That seems to not work with him, since he erupts into chuckling even more.

"Why? Why should I tell you? And if so, are you going to kill me?" I snap at him.

"Why would I...."

"And FYI, I've already gone through some ops due to a bad spine, so I'm sure as hell that it won't work, since my soul is already tainted," I add remembering the lines from the book, while getting myself out of the gummy clouds, and sitting on it.

He abruptly bursts into a fits of laughter, and this time grabbing his stomach, as he gradually rolls on to the cloud beds, and I see water glimmering at the corners of his eyes.

"Oh. My. God!" He goes on chuckling. "Why I always runs into clueless newbies! Oh boy!"

"Oh! But this one's feisty too!" He laughs again.

I groan, as he has started to get on my nerves.

"But you still haven't given me an answer yet," I remind him, while rubbing my forehead.

"Oh yes! You see, you asked a lotta questions...at once, so I got a little confused. And then your seemingly innocent yet stupid acts and speculation got me real bad, and you must've noticed till now that...joking is my forte, unless and until your observance is so poor, which is hopefully not, so you see the rest," he blurts it all out in one elevated breath, and smiles down at me as he holds a hand out, and gestures for me to accept it.

"Now tell me, birdie, which one should I attend first?"

"Just tell me who the hell are you," I retort calmly, while grabbing his hand cautiously, and to my utter surprise, I can actually feel it.

"The name is Misaki Hayashi, charm is my nickname, and I'mma soon be a veteran soul in this spirit world. Does that fill your query?"

"How long have you been here?", I ask, ignoring his taunts, and getting up from the cloud beds.

"Haven't you ever been told that, it's a bad thing to answer a question with another question?"

I pass him an incredulous look, which he dismisses so blithely.

"I'm not really sure 'bout that," I exclaim with a straight face. "You asked me to repeat myself, and that's what I'm doing."

"Ah-ha! I get. No need to get dracula over me," he declares with a lapsed reference, as he floats his body in the air, and makes a thoughtful face which resembles that of an attorney.

"I'm not sure, but maybe I've been here for 20 years... Or has it been 30? I'm not really sure," he informs, and for the least, he sounds genuine.

"What about you? Are you new here? Seeing the way you pulled the screeching fit, I don't think, you've died much longer. How you died again?", he asks curiously.

Now it's taking a wrong turn, and I don't even know if he's liable to keeping my trust.

"I'm not yet done with my questions, so don't butt in," I purposefully try to steer the conversation back to how it supposed to be.

"I never said I won't, I just don't understand why are you trying to dodge this question," he exclaims skeptically.

"Who, who, who said I'm dodging?", I protest, in an attempt to cover up.

Suddenly he appears right before me, and stares blankly at my face, with suspicion filled in his dark eyes, making me blink several times, and I find it even hard to gulp down my own saliva.

Reading my face up close, he smiles cynically.

"You don't seem to have pseudologia fantastica, so I know," he replies confidently.

"Wha-what do you mean?", I retort nervously.

"I've seen so many pathological liars during my internship at the national court. But you, my dear birdie, don't fall under that category. So stop playing oblivious, and spill it already," he taunts.

"I'm not hiding anything, and why would I?"

"I never said, you're hiding something, or are you?", he interrogates, with his arms neatly folded, as he leans more towards me.

Then suddenly his posture changes, as a terror settles over his bright face, and he straightens himself discreetly.

"Don't tell me you're a living soul," he starts to get worked up. "But if so, you don't even know how much danger you've brought on yourself!"

"What do you mean?", I ask eagerly, yet it feels a bit disconcerting.

He leaves an exasperated sigh, before looking at me, his both hands placed leisurely on his hips.

"There are so many people, out there, who are always on hunt for a living soul, and trust me when I say, they are worse than hungry hyenas," he informs. "They show no mercy."

I gulp hard on my own saliva, as an unknown dread dawns upon me.

"But don't you worry," he patronizes, as he cracks an infectious smile. "As long as you stick with me, you'll be safe and sound. I've connections, and I used to be a good fighter back in those days."

He makes a fighting posture, as he balls his fists on both hands, and spreads them out in a defensive way.

I stifle a laugh, and cover it up with a muffled cough.

"But have you ever heard of the book 'Hypnotica'?", I ask giddily, putting my mirth aside.

"Oh yeah! I'm sure I've heard the name before. But don't ask me when, cause I don't remember at all," he informs. "But why you ask?"

"I came outta my body, following the instructions written on it, it's anonymous, so I don't know how much authentic it is. But I've done this before, a few times, so I think it'll work," I tell him honestly.

"Kudos to you and your incredible grit!" He bows his head down to me.

He tilts his head up to look at me. "But why you did that? Doesn't being alive feel good? If so, then let me take your body. I'll be more than ecstatic to accept that!"

"Hey," I protest. "You need my consent first before overpowering my body, which is not happening in this lifetime."

I throw him a tight smile.

"Woah! Okay! You know a lot of stuff, I see," he chuckles. "But tell me at least what made you go this far."

"I need to go back to India as soon as possible, but expanses and time- both are against my favor right now, so this seemed the easiest and only way possible, without worrying anyone unnecessarily," I inform, holding my emotions back.

"And why you wanna go there?"

"There's someone whom I need to hate...but I can't, no matter however I try," I speak slowly, my voice just above the whispers. "That someone is in a bad shape, and...I'm partially responsible for that."

"I wanna see him for this once and for the last time, to let go of everything, and to make sure...that he also does the same for me." My voice cracks as those suppressed emotions again start to resurface.

"You are something else, birdie," he notes sincerely, taking me out of my dazed state.

"Okay! I've decided," he perks up all of a sudden, and looks at me with this bright smile on his lips. "I'll lead you the way to India."

"Since I'm way too sensitive for a soul, so I'll help you," he exaggerates. "But no need to thank me, I'm not that great, but yeah, you can always give up your body to me!"

"'Oh my! How great of you! I'm so blessed'," I feign a gratitude. "Did you expect me to say something like that? Sorry, but I'm too bad at that, especially when someone is so after my body!"

"And stop ogling over my BODY!!", I bark at him.

He covers his ears with both hands, and grimaces his face instantly.

"Geez, girl! I know, you definitely work for opera! But no need to prove it, by harming my organ of corti. I'm quiet young, and as you can see, I've got great visuals as well," he exaggerates, putting a cheeky smile on his face, and posing like a model to clarify his point.

I scoff. "What's the point anyway? You're already dead."

He turns his face towards me, his eyes as big as a bug, as he puts on an pretense of being on the verge of crying. "SO mean! How could you break my heart? Who the hell gave you the authorization to confiscate my civil human right away from me?"

"Laws don't apply for dead people," I inform him with a blank face.

And in moments, I see him crouching down on the clouds, facing his back to me, and scratching something absent-mindedly on there. "Nobody loves me, nobody needs me, I'm so lonely, so alone," he mutters to himself, but makes sure that it's loud enough for me to hear.

"Dramaqueen," I seethe through my gritted teeth, while rubbing my temples in annoyance.

"Cut it out and get up now," I tell him off. "Did you already forget that I need your help? Wow, you have such a terrible memory!"

He springs up instantly with confidence brimming on his face. "Who said so? And FYI, my IQ used to be 135. Can you say the same for yourself?"

"Mine is 157!" I smirk deviously.

He pulls the same stunt again, as he crouches down with that long face, and mutters, "It's so unfair, injustice to me! I need equity! God, why can't I win for just once?"

"Act your age, moron," I snap as annoyance got the best of me, and making him drop his act instantly in the process.

"Aye, aye, birdie!" He salutes me, before floating up in the air. "Follow me! I know someone who can help."

"Okay, but Misaki...." I stop myself as I realize that his name is so unusual for a guy.

"Oye," I call out, catching up with him.

"Yeah?"

"Are you a guy or girl?"

He jumps in that state, with a visible discomfort written all over his face. "Huh! What the hell? I'm a guy!"

I look at him skeptically. "But Misaki is a girl's name, isn't it?"

"That's my surname," he barks. "And don't ask me to prove my masculinity. It's a violation of...."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Now don't go on with your law chapters again. I won't understand anyway," I dismiss him, while getting ahead of him.

I halt on the way to look back at him. "Ain't you coming?"

"You're so annoying, you know right?"

"You're perhaps talking bout yourself?", I taunt.

And then he goes on again with his law and its almighty frame. But the thing is, no law applies when you start to evolve unwanted yet ingenuous feelings for someone who can never be yours; it's way too scarier than law itself.