So hey it's been awhile since I really posted anything. Well I've been posting ancoments. I feel like.i need to explain my self why I haven't been posting.and I need to be honest. I've been stressed a lot. Two weeks ago I started cutting and I've stop by now but....it feels werid to look at the scars and be okay with my self. I've been trying to say something or anything about it to my friends but I never did. I didn't because I was scared that if I opened up to my friends that they wouldnt cared. Snd I'm right they don't. Today at lunch I was having a pain attack and only ONE out of 10 to 15 people there were trying to help. So I'm glad I didn't say anything. Ive been panic attacks a lot more. And hopefully they stop for a bit. But I'm tried. I'm so tried that everyone thinks they can push me around. I've been the push over for so dam long that when I want to say something or stand up for myself. No one takes me seriously. And I'm done. So tomorrow I'm honestly don't give two shits what my "friends" say anymore. I mean why should I? They don't care. It's time i actually stand up for my self.