Alpha Alexandre Brutus's Point of View

She's trying...to kill me.

Without a doubt.

Not only had she woken up and kissed me (the first time she's ever been the one to initiate the kissing I might add), but now she was all snuggled up in bed with her head on me. I am not equipped to handle the internal struggle going on inside me.

"She's your mate, she obviously wants you, it's ok to act on what you feel! And the timing and location are perfect, alone, in bed"

My wolf had been on the "jump-her-bones" bandwagon since the very beginning but I knew she really wanted to wait for me to grow up... Or something.

She radiated heat like crazy now that she was healthy and her warm leg was touching mine closely since she moved closer to me. I had intentionally left that space in an effort to help control my urges and yet...

I tried to focus on eating my food, which worked for about five minutes until syrup ran off my bite and onto my pec.

I was reaching for a napkin when out of no where she leaned over and licked it off.

...

Holy...

sh*t...

...

It was like my brain shut down.

I can't handle this. I can't do this.

"You should kiss her. You should throw her against the bed and..."

No, I should leave.

"After you grab her and kiss the sh*t out of her"

No, I need to just pretend like it didn't happen.

"But it did happen and it definitely made you happy. She said she liked it when you were happy".

No she didn't, she likes it when I'm laughing, not when I'm a pervert.

The struggle between my wolf and I was like the struggle between the devil and... well some lesser demon, I'm not really angelic.

I slowly blinked, realizing I was still frozen in the position I had been in when she kissed me.

That kiss...

Agh! No, outside, now.

I stood up and made my way across the room. I went out onto the balcony and took a deep breath of the freezing air, which felt even colder since I was used to her warm... soft....skin....

Oh gosh, not helping. I dropped to a fetal position and took deep breaths, trying to think of anything but my half naked mate sitting on the bed in the room behind me.

Damn...

I sat like that for what seemed like hours until I felt my...body...cool off. Literally and figuratively. I opened the door and went back inside, walking as calmly as possible to the bed.

"Are... you ok?" She was giving me the most ridiculous...yet adorable... look imaginable.

"Yes" I said curtly, trying to contain the part of me that was screaming for her.

"Ummm, it's a little chilly to be going outside half naked" she pointed out hesitantly.

"I know, but I needed it" Man oh man did I need it.

"Oh...kay..." Her tone suggested she thought I was insane but she finished watching her show about nasty rotting people.

Disgusting.

When the show was over, she sighed and handed me the tray of empty plates to set on the bedside table. When I turned around I came face first with spandex clad butt as she climbed gracelessly out of bed.

"Oh come on..." I mumbled through gritted teeth.

"What?" she asked when she had two feet in the floor.

"Nothing" I said louder and gave her the look that always makes her squirm and run away. A middle ground between 'intense desire' and 'deviant devil'.

"Umm, I'm going to go shower" she said with a slight stutter.

"Ok" I said, getting out of bed to intercept her path, which was a very quick b-line to the bathroom.

"Yes?" she asked, looking nervous. She may have her provocative moments, but I'm starting to think that those were her panthers inner workings because she was so shy around me most of the time. The look in her face honestly told me that she thought I was going to attack her in the shower, which I would never do.

Well...right now.

"Don't think about that" I mentally chastised myself then said out loud, "I need to look at your wounds".

"Oh, ok" she said and looked at me for a long time, as if she was considering something. I hated when she got that look, it meant nothing good for me... at all. It meant her panther had persuaded her to do something... promiscuous... although forced might be a better word than persuaded.

She slowly held her arms up in the air above her head. I felt my brow furrow as she looked at me with an arched, taunting eyebrow.

Did she really want me to...

Yes. Of course she did. It wouldn't be Terri if she expected anything else.

I let out a long sigh and prepared myself for more grueling moral battles. I grabbed the bandage end at her side and began to unwind it slowly.

"How did I not notice her tone stomach when I out the bandage on?" I thought to myself.

"Adrenaline. You were afraid she was dying"

"That was a rhetorical thought, I know why" I sneered. I had reached the bottom most layer of wrap and gauze, so I took a knee and gently began pulling the material from where it had stuck with dried blood. Once it was all removed I saw that her injury was almost completely healed where I was able to stitch it and the spots where I couldn't where just angry red marks slowly re-growing new flesh. I ran my fingers over the area and applied pressure to test her tenderness. I watched her face to look for winces, which only happened once or twice. I placed my large hands on her hip bones and held her still while I bent I and kissed her stomach. Her eyes went wide with shock and her right grabbed the side of my head and neck. I was expecting her to lean down and kiss me but instead she used all her strength to throw me to the floor as she fled quickly to the bathroom. I heard the lock click as I sat up from the floor.

"What was that?" I mumbled. A small smile began to creep onto my face, despite the fact that I should be angry. Something about her panicked nervousness was so... Perfect.

"I sound like such a girl" I said quietly.

"Yeah, you do" My wolf agreed.

"I don't know, I guess I like that she resists me and fights the inevitable" I thought. As soon as I thought it I realized how bad that comment sounded. I could easily imagine the look my wolf was giving me.

"Never say that again. You sound like a masochistic rapist"

"Yeah I know" I replied with a wince. A knock came at the bedroom door. When I opened it I found Jason standing on the other side.

"Hey man" he said, giving me a hesitant look. I couldn't blame him for being a little...safe.... considering how snappy I had been. Have always been actually.

"Hey" I said and opened the door further so he could come in.

"I brought you clothes" he said, handing me my black gym bag. I opened it and found dark wash jeans and a black v-neck sweater. Boxers, my tooth brush, and my hair care products were also at the bottom.

"Thanks" I said with a smile. I looked up at Jason to find him staring at me with wide eyes and a disbelieving facial expression. "What?" I asked with a small chuckle.

"I-you're- the fact that you're smiling and...chuckling is a little... uncomfortable for me..."

"Why?" I asked, even though I knew what he meant. I never really laughed or smiled, even when I wasn't angry. But today was a different story.

"Because you... don't... ever" he honestly looked like he thought I was contaminated and was going to explode.

"I never felt like I had a reason to" I said off-handedly and began putting on my clothes.

"Thanks, that makes me feel appreciated" he said with a dry look.

"You know what I mean" I said, and looked toward the bathroom where I could still hear the shower running.

He followed my look with a furrowed brow then gave me a look of pure disgust.

"Awwww c'mon man, while she was passed out injured?!"

"What?! No! Not like that! I don't need a girl, especially my mate, to be incapacitated to get some. Geez. No, it's just... different between us now. She hates me less... heck she might even like me" I said quietly.

"Are you- Are you blushing?! No, no, I can't handle this, that's too many emotions from you in one day. I'm leaving" Jason said, shaking his head enigmatically and waving his hands around. "Oh and you might want to hurry to the pack house, Nate's mate has information to give us about who the group she was with are and their plans. Apparently, Terri being attacked by the lion shifter wasn't the only time she's been targeted" Jason said, then left.

"Targeted?" I repeated quietly with a furrowed brow, and again, looked toward the bathroom door.