Her brother also left afterwards as if he just came to check on her. I didn't have the strength to ask her what was on my mind, so I just walked around with her in complete silence.

"Sou, are you listening?" She suddenly broke the silence which is a bit unusual.

This time, I'm the only one nodding in response. She let out a sad smile.

Suddenly, I remembered I had something to give her.

"Hey," I called out to her and she stopped walking to look back to me. "Before I go, I want to give you something." I smiled at her.

Somehow, she looked really sad when I said those words.. but she still smiled. "Yes?"

"Sit down." I asked her and she did so. I knelt on one knee and she blushed out of confusion. "I made it for you" I gently grabbed her feet and put on a pair of wooden sandals for her.

"For me?" She asked lovingly.

I casually nodded. She looked really happy, I could see the way her eyes were sparkling.

"Thank you.. you're very sweet and thoughtful, Sou." Unexpectedly, she began tearing up and sniffing. She wipes her tears before they even fall uncontrollably.

"You're really crying about that..?" I jokingly asked.

"Yes" She answered with a trembling voice. "I wish I could give you my eyes for giving my feet these wooden sandals."

"You're eyes?! Why? It's not like I can't see." I replied curiously.

"No.. you don't see how amazing you are. I wish you could love yourself Sou, so you will stop beating yourself up over things that aren't really your fault. You deserve happiness just like every other innocent human being." She began crying out loud.. like her feelings finally burst.

The dam of emotions broke down and flooded all the way out of her beautiful eyes.

I hugged her to help her calm down. However, her words were starting to make me feel emotional too.

"It's okay"

Those were the only words I could come up with. She cried even more after I said that..

Author's point of view

Life can be cruel and unfair.. but it also has a beautiful side that involves a cycle. If there is a cycle of hatred, there is also a cycle of love. When one saves another, the person who was rescued could also end up saving someone else. Even the smallest gesture of kindness can brighten up someone's day and might end up saving them.

Sou's point of view

After the breakdown, she took me a completely different place. It was an abandoned city.. it looks like absolute ruins now. We sat next to each other on a rooftop, admiring the beautifully broken world.

It seemed like it was taken straight out of a post apocalyptic movie.

Both gazing towards the horizon.. the two of us were in deep thoughts.

"It's ruined.. it looks sad.. but also tragically beautiful. I can't understand it." My feelings were confused.

"Yes." She nodded. "It looks sad and empty. Look at that, Sou. It can resemble a person. If you can look at something so broken and still find it beautiful.. I hope you can do the same for yourself." She looked at me and smiled.

"self acceptance isn't as easy as you make it out to be." I avoided her eyes and looked the opposite direction.

"Yes. Take your time." She gently replied to give me the assurance that she wasn't trying to pressure me. She stood up and offered her hand.

It felt like I have already done the same thing for someone before.

"Let's go home, Sou"

Without saying anything more.. I took her hand and we went back to that magical forest. Following her without a question..

we ended at where it all began.

The abandoned temple.

"What are we doing here..?" I asked with a nervous look on my face.

She walked forward and bent down to pick up a worn out book on the ground.

"Nameless" She said and confused me. She turned around with her usual smile, cradling the book in her hand. "This forest.. this entire world is for spirits alone. The fox you saw is the one who guides lost spirits." She began saying words that didn't really make sense.. normally.

Except that I understood it perfectly.

"I see.." I clutched my chest and frowned. "Then.. after all this time.. I've always been.. dead.." Tears gathered in my eyes once again. The memories that has been buried in the back of my mind finally became clear.

I knew the answer all this time.

It all goes back to the first day I visited the bookstore.

It flashed back.. my entire life in just a few seconds.

I killed myself a long time ago. What I see in my daily life is just a repetition.. and the reason why my parents ignored me was because they no longer see me. They became even more miserable after I left. My friends look fine but that's why they say they miss me even though I was right in front of them. I wasn't really there with them.

I had a lot of reasons. But the main one was because I wae already tired.

"The bookstore is only visible to spirits.. and I.. am a cursed spirit who will aimlessly wander around the earth for eternity." Her voice brought me back to the present situation. I was crying, I couldn't see her clearly anymore. "This book.. is untitled because it holds my nameless soul in it. It is my story. Thank you for reading it." She smiled at me.

"Nameless.. why?" I asked with trembling voice.

"I've been a lost soul for as long as I could remember. I don't even know my name. All I have is this book. Here, I am alive." She said as she hands over the book to me.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I stared at the book.

"Go back, Sou.
  It's not too late." She left the book in my hands and took a step back with a smile through her tears.

"Wait.. I don't want to leave you alone!" I cried out but as I touched the book, I began to glow while she began to fade away.

"I'm glad I was able to be your friend, Sou. Thank you for saving my soul. Now, I'm free." She waved goodbye..

My vision turned white until I could no longer hear my own voice that's calling out to her..

she without a name..

Author's point of view

Sou woke up back in reality. Fate has decided to give his lost soul another chance to find his direction. He found himself in the middle of his class, being scolded for dozing off.

"What the..?" Sou muttered to himself. Everything is still fresh in his mind.

His heart won't calm down. He stood up and ran out of the room without a word, worrying his friends and even his teacher.

He ran so fast even if he found it hard to breathe. It was like he went back in time.

Knowing he died, he was so desperate to know if he still truly alive now. He ran back to check on his parents.

"Sou?" His mother called out to him, worried about her son covered in sweat.

"Mom.." Sou embraced her and his father came to check on them.

"What's going on?" His father asked.

"Dad!" Sou also ran up to his father and hugged him.

"W-what's with you all of a sudden?" His parents asked, concerned.

"I'm so sorry for not saying anything.. I won't run away anymore. Please let's try to make peace with each other.. so that we won't regret anything in the end. Please?" Sou was pleading desperately.

His parents glanced at each other for a second and looked back to Sou. "Alright son.. we'll try to talk about this, okay?" "We care about you, son."

After that.. he quickly ran out once again to find the bookstore.. hoping that he'll find the girl who helped him.

But..

What he only saw was a graveyard.

"I'm sure I went the right way.." Sou looked hopeless. Until he noticed one of the graves. He stared at it and he heard a familiar voice.

"It's okay," the disembodied voice said. Sou sighed and smiled at the sky. "Sou" the voice said his name one last time.

He knelt down in front of the grave and tried to read the writing but it only said "Nameless" which is read as "Mumei" in the used language.

"Yes, Mumei.
  It's okay." Sou said.

Fin.
12|08|18 3 AM
yours truly,
grimoirelle