*clears throat* *announcer voice* So this is drabbles or headcannons from the BBC Tv show: Sherlock. There are three, in total, so enjoy.

1. (Thanks @Always_Author

"Card not active."
John glared at the machine. He swiped again.
"Card not active."
"Stop."
"Card not active."
"Seriously don't do this to me."
"Card not active."
"DON'T!" John looked around as people stared at him then quieted his voice. "Don't do this to me. Not now."
"Card not active."
"GAH!" John kicked the machine, stubbing his toe. "Ow,ow,ow,ow,ow!" He glared at it and put his groceries back. "Fine I didn't want food anyway."

Then came the mobile phone.
"Why won't you connect to the Internet?"
He reloaded.
"I paid for Internet."
Reload.
"Stop mucking about."
Reload.
"I HAVE Internet."
Reload. John, frustrated with still no bars, thrust his fist down where his phone clattered out of his hands and shattered.
Sighing, he picked up the shattered phone and decided that was probably enough for today.

Then he decided to go on his laptop. Which of course, refused to except his passcode.
"No I got it right! You're the one that's WRONG."
Passcode not accepted.
"That's my passcode!"
"John!" Sherlock yelled, "quit yelling at the laptop. It's interfering with my thinking!"
"But it keeps saying I got my passcode wrong," John whined. Sherlock, with an exasperated sigh, entered John's passcode and the computer excepted it.
"There. Now will you SHUT. UP."
"How'd you know my passcode?"
"It's not exactly difficult to guess. StudyInPink?"

2. Thanks to @FaNdOmFiCs03

It was 2 a.m. when Sherlock got the phone call.

"Heeeeey Sherly," a wobbly voice said through the other side of the phone. He hadn't heard that voice since his five minute deportation.

"Moriarty?" He asked, then stared at the phone for a second. "Are you drunk?"

"ABSOLUTELY NOT," Moriarty replied, then giggled, "I just had a few martinis. Like... 5. Or 6. I really don't remember."

"Why'd you call?"

"I had something important to tell y-" Moriarty started, and Sherlock flinched a bit as the sound of vomiting was heard from the other side of the phone. "Oh. What was it?"

Sherlock waited as Moriarty hummed to himself. "Oh! Right! Did you miss me?"

"Uh..." Sherlock trailed off. He thought for a moment, then opened up his laptop, hoping to trace the call back to Moriarty's location. He sounded so incapacitated he may even give up part of his plan.

"Because I missed you Mr. Ordinary Angel." A shrill giggle sounded, and Sherlock had a hard time believing it was his nemesis on the phone. "Is your refrigerator running?"

Sherlock was taken back by the strange question and stopped typing. "What?"

"I SAID is your refrigerator running?"

"Yes?"

"Well then you better CATCH IT!" Moriarty broke into giggles again. "Anyway bye bye. I've got a world to take over."

Sherlock desperately tried to finish finding the call, "catch you later."

"NO YOU WON'T!" Moriarty giggled before he hung up, leaving Sherlock with no location, a dial tone, and a new bullet hole in his wall.

3. Again, thanks @Always_Author

((Occurs prior to Sherlock's return))

Mary was ready. All of her training had prepared her for this. She put on her ski mask, harness, and packed her duffle bag with her double-edged butterfly knife, sedative patches... And shaving cream.

It was time to shave off John's mustache.

She attached the harness clip to the top of the air shaft and lowered herself down, where she was easily able to shave off his squirrel that he glued to his face. She had tried dropping subtle hints but now it called for desperate measures. She dropped down, and the vent swung open, banging against the ceiling. John turned in his sleep and Mary lovingly slapped a sedative patch on his neck before turning his over to face her. She took the can of shaving cream, spraying it on his upper lip (and the rest of his face as her stability was a little bumpy hanging in mid-air).

Once she was down she took a cloth and wiped the excess shaving cream off, slipping back up into the vent. Minutes later, she appeared in her pajamas, and took the sedative patch off, tossing it in the rubbish bin.

The next morning John woke up and looked in the mirror.

"Mary!" He yelled, worried. "My  mustache is gone!"

"What mustache?"

"The one that use to be on my face!"

"Darling, you've never had a mustache before."

"Yes! I had one yesterday and now it's gone!"

"It's been a busy week. I'm sure you're just mistaken."

John looked in the mirror and frowned. He wanted a mustache. And now he decided it would be a nice time to grow it out if he hadn't already done it before...