flashback ends

Avni came out of those beautiful past memories that she and neil had created.... before their marriage.

She thought how everything has changed since they got married.
As if the neil she loved was a different man....and the neil she is living with is a completely different one.
He has changed.

Or may be...May be she has changed.

Or....Are these the circumstances that made their lives turned like this.

...........

Days passed by....

Avni told Neil that she finally decided to have the baby.
As they both somewhere knew that this baby is a part of their life.
Both neil and avni have a special place in their hearts.....for the baby.

May be not jointly....but separatly they do love their baby....who is now breathing peacefully.... inside avni's body.

...........

But nothing has changed in these days. Their days were back to normal...of what they were before they got to know they are pregnant.

They are the same Neil....and the same Avni.

Neil again got himself busy in his work. Everyday he comes late from his office.

Nothing changed in him....except for now, he care to ask Avni everyday that...Is she fine or not.....having any pain or not... if she needs anything....need to see doctor....want to have something.

Avni do smile...and feel cared sometimes.
But what's lacking was still lacking between the two of them.

On the other hand....She also fulfils all her responsibilities....as his wife.

Keep his clothes ready....makes breakfast for them.....Ask him everyday if he ate his lunch.....
....and keep his dinner in the microwave so that he just need to press a button and can eat whenever he came back home.

Mostly he came after 12 a.m.
And keeping awake this late is not good for the baby.....so Avni makes sure to sleep before that....(waiting for him till 12 a.m , in a hope that someday he will make it early can they can spend some time together....apart from just doing work and...fulfilling duties )

On One Morning

After neil left for his office , avni went out to get some fresh air.
She went to the nearby park.

She start walking in the park.
But she got tired withing few minutes only and  she started feeling breathlessness.
She sat on a nearby bench to relax.

Her breath got normal and she sat there for few more minutes to see  the surroundings.

She saw so many kids playing in the park....moving here and there and  enjoying on the swings.

All those bright little faces brought a beautiful smile on her face.

Suddenly she saw a little kid crawling towards her, on his tiny little legs.

The kid looked so cute and she just picked him up and squeeshed his cheeks. She smiled with joy.

Within few minutes....the baby's mother arrived looking for him...and found him in avni's arms....she feel relieved.

The lady : Oh my baby.....i lost my breathe. (she whispered taking her baby from avni's arms )

The mother hugged her baby tightly hiding him in her embrace.

Avni saw that pain mixed with some relief on the mother's face .

Avni : Its okay...he is fine. He just crawled here...and I...I picked him up. I am sorry if I....

The lady : No...i am sorry....i....i just got scared for a minute.

Avni :  I can understand....she smiled while caressing the baby's face...who was now giggling in his mother's arms).....And your baby is really cute. Look how he is giggling...

The lady ( saw his baby's smiling face ) : You know....jabse he came into my life.....I can't even imagine my life without him.
As if it was him, who gave a new birth to me.

Avni looked into her eyes and saw how a mother feels for her baby. That selfless love....that unconditional love...and that feeling of happily sacrificing your life for your little one.

The lady left with her baby....but Avni stood their with lots of emotions running down her veins.

She looked down and then slowly placed a hand on her stomach to get this feeling called motherly love.

Avni : I promise baby.....mumma will always protect you...and will always love you to the ends..... she was smiling all this while.

As if she has found a new way to love her life.

To live her life.....Not for herself....not for Neil...but, for this baby.

...............

Avni now wake up everyday with a bright smile on her face.

She is counting every single day.... Just for that one moment to hold her baby in her arms.

She keeps herself busy in reading books and watching shows on baby care and motherhood.

Neil and his ignorance does not bother her anymore now.

Earlier she used to feel sad when everytime neil make any excuses and avoid going shopping with her. And everytime she end up not going anywhere.

But now, she herself goes for shopping....exploring different places just to buy new things for her soon to be jaan.

She buys everything from baby clothes...shoes.... to toys and many more.

Surely, this baby has changed her way of living. And has already done somthing good for Avni.
She started feeling alive.

.............

One day

Evening 4 p.m

She was having her food and was watching a t.v show.
After finishing, she got up to keep the plates into the kitchen.

She kept the plates on the sink when suddenly.....she felt a sudden harsh pain running inside her body.

She immediately placed her hand on her stomach and held the kitchen slab with another hand for the support.

Avni : Ah..ahhhh......she started breathing heavily and winced in pain

The pain soon got travelled throughout her entire body giving her shivers.

Avni : ahh....ahhh....ahhhh.....she cried in pain.

Somehow she just managed to walk a few steps,  and picked her phone to dial neil's number.

.............

Neil immediately came home all panicking...and without wasting even a single minute, he rushed her to the hospital.

All this while....., avni kept on murmuring the same words...

Avni (crying in pain) :  Please save my baby neil...I...i don't wanna lose him...i don't wanna lose him neil...pl....please save my baby....m...my baby....

.........

They reached the hospital

Neil could'nt control his tears. He kept caressing her forehead, until she was taken inside the examination room.

He was waiting outside having tears filled in his eyes, and the only words came out of his mouth were....

Neil : Please save them God...please.....

.................

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Adiza Diaries
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