Love. Everyone thought love was so beautiful. Such a fairy tale. Caro knew better. She had seen her parents and what love had done to them. It never let them fully be happy without the other. It never let them separate, but when they were together, it never ended well for them or their family.

Caro had also already lost one boyfriend, and what happened that night, to him and to her, it was devastated, debilitating, and ruining. And now she feared that it could happen all over again.

Love was parasitic, it was painful, and it was inconvenient. She didn't trust love. She didn't like what it did to people. Love was up, down, easy, hard, and everything and anything that anyone could say or think of. But she knew that no one could ever really fight against it. No matter how hard they tried.

At first when Carolina woke up the next morning and saw that Marcus wasn't there, she didn't think much of it, knowing that he kept his word about leaving when she fell asleep to go home so he wouldn't get in too much trouble.

But when she heard about the bike accident, and knowing Marcus was in the hospital, she was absolutely horrified. Terrified that for her, history may have been repeating. She was so scared to lose Marcus after she had already lost someone she loved before. Just when she had admitted to herself, and to others, how she really felt about Marcus, and allowed herself to actually want to see what it was like for them to be together, and even kissed him... before he saw an episode of hers after an emotional and angry fight with her sister and saw Caro about to hurt herself... now he was the one hurt and in the hospital, and Caro felt powerless to do anything about it.

Carolina had spent all night the night Marcus was in the hospital not being able to sleep, pacing, freaking out, and not knowing what to do. She kept texting him, but didn't get a reply, and she wondered if he had lost his phone due to the bike accident, or if he didn't have it, or if it was just off, but it didn't relieve any of her paranoia, worry or fear as she anxiously waited for news to see if he was okay.

When morning came, Georgia came to check on Carolina, who hadn't been able to sleep. "Hey."

Carolina sat up, worried. "Have you heard anything?"

Georgia sat in front of Carolina, sighing heavily. "When I last talked to Ellen, he was going in for a CAT scan." Carolina looked away, breathing shakily. Georgia, knowing she was scared, took her hands. "He's gonna be okay. It's not gonna happen again, Caro."

"You don't know that," Carolina told her.

Georgia knew she was right, sighing. "Can we talk about it?"

"About what?" Carolina asked. "You or Dad, Ginny being a complete bitch and sending me into one of my worst episodes again, or the fact that Marcus got into a motorcycle accident?"

"Either," Georgia answered. "All."

Carolina didn't want to talk about any of it, closing off again, plus the fact that she was exhausted. "I just wanna get some sleep."

Georgia nodded in agreement. "Okay. That's fair." Carolina laid down, closing her eyes. Georgia stroked her hair. "I love you."

Carolina whispered, barely heard. "Love you."

Ginny was walking in the hallway, looking into Carolina's room through the slightly open door, knowing that what happened with Marcus was her fault because of the things that she had said, looking incredibly guilty and not knowing what to do about it, and hearing about the episode Caro had had because of her, also guilty about that. She knew that Caro didn't want to talk to her at all and for good reason, and she knew it would only get worse once she found out. She had too been texting Marcus, but it was to beg him not to say anything because she didn't want to lose her twin sister forever, or her new friends, but she never got an answer to her texts either.

Georgia left Carolina to get some sleep, closing the door behind her.

Carolina was set on trying to get some sleep, but when she heard the Baker car arrive home across the street, she released a soft gasp, getting up immediately, and ran to her window to look outside, seeing Ellen and Marcus arriving home.

Marcus was bruised and slightly road burned on the face, and he looked exhausted and out of it. He looked toward the Miller house, seeing Carolina in the window, watching worriedly. They both exchanged a long worried look with the other since the last time they saw each other, Caro had been in the middle of an episode and about to self harm, and Marcus got into the motorcycle accident.

Ellen gently took Marcus by the shoulders and led him into their home, as Carolina watched worriedly in concern, hating to see him so hurt, but relieved to see him mostly okay, like she could finally breathe again, closing her eyes.

✯

At school, Carolina could barely focus on anything, overwhelmed, shaky and panicky, as she went to her locker to try and get her stuff for first period, AP English, not looking forward to having to deal with Gitten that day at all given her state.

MANG was across the hall behind her at the purple wall.

"Carolina, are you okay?" Norah asked. "Max and Ginny were just telling us about Marcus. I know you guys are friends."

Carolina turned to face them, breathing shakily. "Not okay. Not really."

Max walked closer to Carolina to hug her, and Carolina wasn't even surprised that she hugged back given that Max was worried about her brother.

Ginny looked surprised by Carolina and Max hugging, and looked down in guilt because they were both in pain because of her, because of what she said to Marcus leading up to his accident.

"Caro, I know you like him and something's going on between you two even if you two aren't actually together," Max told her. "It's okay. I know this is really bad given your history, and..."

"It feels like history repeating," Carolina finished. "Are you okay?"

"Not really," Max answered.

Abby and Norah looked at them sadly. Ginny was incredibly guilty and trying not to show it. She looked like she had to tell someone, anyone, about what happened to ease her own guilt, but she didn't know who to tell.

"What happened anyway?" Abby asked.

"He took a corner too fast, slid off the road," Max answered. "So now he has a concussion."

"Oh, my God," Abby said. "That is, like, so scary."

"I had a concussion once when I went skiing," Norah told them. "It was the worst. Did he black out or throw up?"

"Do the hokey pokey?" Max a sked. "Turn himself around? Yeah, he got the whole fun concussion grab bag."

Carolina remembered having to get a bag like that after the mugging given what those men did to her by beating her so badly, groaning. "God. I hate those things." The girls knew that she had gotten one too from the mugging, looking at her sadly. "But he's gonna be okay, right?"

"He should be back to normal, but it could take a few months, so..." Max trailed off. Carolina sighed worriedly. "It's just so stupid. Why would he ride his bike? I mean, he doesn't even have his license or know how to ride."

"I was, uh, supposed be technically giving him lessons but we never had the time, and, uh..." Carolina trailed off. "I don't know why he would do that after..."

"After what?" Max asked.

Carolina swallowed. "I had a really bad episode last night, and he was there, and he helped me, but..." The girls were even more concerned. Ginny was even more guilty. "He could've been killed. What would possess him to do that?"

Max scoffed. "I blame toxic masculinity."

"Why?" Abby asked.

"I--I don't know," Max said.

Abby nodded. "Oh. Okay."

Sophie walked closer. "Hey." Max walked toward her instantly. "Come here." Max and Sophie embraced. "Hey, guys."

Abby gestured between the four cliquey girls. "Actually, it's MANG. Carolina's not apart of it, but, uh... seems like she's softening up a bit to start to be friends."

Carolina shook her head. "No."

Carolina walked back to her locker to get her things.

Ginny looked at the girls. "Ignore that. She's in lock down again because of what happened."

Max, Abby and Norah nodded in understanding.

Sophie led Max a little away to talk to her. "How are you?"

Max sighed worriedly. "It was awful. Literally, so scary. I mean, my dad cried. I've never seen Clint cry."

"I'm so sorry, Max," Sophie told her.

Max managed a small smile. "Thanks for being here for me. I love you."

Sophie looked worried about what she said, but Max didn't notice, embracing her. Sophie returned the hug.

Ginny was trying to text Marcus again to beg him not to say anything, still not receiving an answer, apologizing for being the reason why he was in the accident. She looked down the hallway to see Hunter, but Hunter was avoiding her after their fight, walking out of the hallway.

✯

After school, Carolina and Ginny were working. Ginny was running the register and to-go orders, and looking toward Caro in worry and guilt, avoiding her because of that guilt, but Caro didn't notice because she was avoiding Ginny since she was the reason for her bad episode and near self-harm the night of Marcus's accident.

Carolina was putting cutlery on the tables, trying to keep busy so she wasn't thinking.

"So I need all of those tables reset with cutlery before you take off, please," Joe told her, moving a tray with wine glasses, seeing a poster on the wall. "Oh, look, Sing Sing!  A musical with all white people behind bars. A work of fiction. Also, have you seen my pens? I don't know where my pens are. I feel like I just restocked them. It's like just this very mundane episode of 'The Twilight Zone'." Carolina walked behind the bar to get a big pitcher of tea, looking completely out of it, enough to where when she turned to walk, she bumped into the bar, and accidentally spilled the tea over her clothes and apron, gasping at the cold. Joe walked closer, with a cloth to hand to her. Carolina took the cloth to wipe at the tea, but she knew that she would have to change after getting home, sighing in frustration. "What's going on with you?"

Carolina shook her head. "Nothing."

"Nothing," Joe repeated. "Okay. Would you like to talk about nothing?"

Carolina knew if she didn't talk about it, she could explode and end up hurting herself a lot worse than with the lighter, and she didn't want to do that after everything. "Someone I... like got hurt, and..."

"Is this a skateboarding, T-shirt-wearing someone?" Joe asked.

Carolina looked surprised. "How do you--"

Joe tilted his head. "Come on. I see stuff."

"He was only here one..." Carolina trailed off. "You knew the first day when he came in as my first customer?"

Joe nodded. "Yeah."

"God, was it really that obvious?" Carolina asked in annoyance. "Anyway, it's so complicated. He's a mess, and I'm a mess. I spent a long time fighting it, and just when I started not to, and even... I thought that he could be gone forever, and it killed me. And it's not the first time that something like this has happened to me. I, um... I lost my last boyfriend, and I came this close to losing Marcus, and..."

"You're scared it could've happened again," Joe finished.

Carolina nodded. "Yeah. It's complicated."

Joe shook his head. "No, it's not. I've seen the way you and Marcus look at each other. There's nothing complicated about that. If you want advice, just do what you are good at, and be brutally honest."

Carolina sighed. "Yeah, and what if something happens again? If one of us got hurt, or..."

"That's part of life," Joe pointed out. "You never know what's gonna happen. But what were you thinking when you thought that you could've lost him? What did you regret?"

Carolina thought, sighing, not knowing why she was talking to Joe about this, but something about him just made him easy to talk to. "I regretted... waiting so long to admit what..."

Carolina sighed, not able to finish, but she didn't have to for Joe to get the gist.

Joe raised his eyebrows, nodding. "You know the saying 'it's better to have love and lost than not to have loved at all'?"

"I hate that saying so much," Carolina told him.

Joe chuckled. "But is that how you feel now, knowing you waited so long, and almost lost him, and regretted waiting?" Carolina realized that she did, frowning. "See?"

Carolina nodded, sighing, managing a small smile. "Thanks, Joe."

Joe nodded, managing a small smile.

Georgia walked in. "Buttercup, peach, get your stuff. Let's jet." Carolina and Ginny went to get their stuff. Georgia sat at the bar, looking at Joe. "Hey."

"Hey," Joe replied.

"So, you know how in Cheers, whenever Norm goes in, Sam just starts pouring him a beer?" Georgia asked.

Joe knew where she was going with this. "Okay, am I Sam in this fun little role-play?"

"Would you rather be Diane?" Georgia asked.

"Diane abandoned the show, so no," Joe answered, turning to get some champagne, starting to pour.

"Hey, has Carolina talked to you?" Georgia asked. "I'm worried about her."

Joe, having seen how angry Carolina could get when other people talked about her issues because of the time when Caro and Ginny had fought when MANG was there in Blue Farm when Ginny had tried to get Caro and Austin a therapist, shook his head. "Uh, no, nothing." Georgia started to drink. "You okay? You don't look so good."

"Thanks, Joe," Georgia told him sarcastically.

"No, I just mean comparatively," Joe told her. "Like, compared how to you alw--you usually look, which is..."

Georgia nodded sarcastically, reaching behind her head. "Mm-hmm. Oh, right."

"Amazing," Joe finished. "Beautiful."

Georgia took her ponytail down, releasing her hair. "Keep going. Really."

Carolina and Ginny returned with jackets on.

"Ready," Ginny said.

Georgia went to drink more.

Joe tried to stop her. "No, no, please. That... no. That's a 2017 Chateau Bouclier."

"And it was delicious, Sam," Georgia told him.

Ginny put some pens on the bar in front of Joe. "Bottom drawer of the desk. Just so you know."

"Thank you," Joe told her. He looked at Carolina. "And good luck."

Carolina nodded in appreciation, before leaving with Ginny and Georgia.

Outside, they got into the car to drive away. Georgia was in the driver's seat. Carolina was in the passenger seat. Ginny was in the backseat. All three signed.

"We don't..." Carolina trailed off. "We don't have to go home. We could just drive off, start a new life."

Georgia chuckled. "I taught you two well."

"Does Paul know about Zion?" Ginny asked.

Georgia didn't answer.

Carolina looked at Georgia. "I hope you know what you're doing."

"Oh, yeah," Georgia said sarcastically. "Yeah, this was all part of my master plan."

Georgia gave an evil laugh.

"I don't want you to get hurt, Mom," Carolina told her.

"Don't blow up our lives over something temporary with Dad," Ginny told her. "This affects us too."

"I know," Georgia told them. "I know. Don't worry. It was a momentary lapse. I got everything under control now."

Carolina nodded, skeptic, but let it go for now, looking away, thinking about what she and Joe had been talking about.