The place had started to fill up even more about an hour after we had arrived at Amber's house.

I felt myself coil in my chair, as more people started to gather, chatting and singing. Beatrice had her sunglasses on and was laying back in the stretch-out chair silently, so I wasn't sure if she was awake or not.

One thing I did know , though, was that I didn't like being in crowded places. I realised that now. Especially if those places were crowded with people I didn't know. I wondered how the people surrounded by loads of friends managed themselves. How can you be close to people if there are just so many of them?

The only time I got up from my chair was to try some of the lemonade which had been over-filled with sugar, and then I stayed parked where I was, not too keen on trying anything else.

Kids splashed around and played in the pool, and it was tempting to just jump in. But what if it looked weird? I never did anything out of the blue.

People might be confused as to why the quiet background girl would suddenly jump into the very centre of the party.

"Just do it," Beatrice said suddenly, making me jump.

"Do what"?

"You know what I mean. Jump in. Go for a splash. You know you want to".

I sighed. "Easy for you to say. You're not socially awkward. Why don't you jump in"?

"I'm watching our boy over there," Beatrice nodded over to Aki, who at that very moment was walking towards us with two plates of snacks.

"I thought you were asleep".

"I don't fall asleep on duty, Jemmy," Beatrice placed her sunglasses on her forehead, and sat up, as Aki jogged over and sat himself down in between us, a bright look in his eyes.

"How's things going with the girlfriend"? Beatrice asked him, snatching a handful of pretzels from one of the plates. Aki signed that it was fun decorating, and now he was really enjoying the party.

He didn't even deny the girlfriend part.

"Have you gone in the water yet"? I asked, even though it was a dumb question seeing as he was still dry and still had his normal clothes on. He shook his head and looked at me nodding over to the pool.

"What? Um, no, I can't swim". I lied, as he started unbuttoning his shirt.

Beatrice gave me a look and I shrugged. She rolled her eyes before pulling her dress over her head and folding it up before placing it in our towel bag. She gave me a cheeky grin. "Well, have fun, clothes supervisor. Aki and I are gonna dive".

I groaned, as they both continued to look at me, expectantly. "FINE," I couldn't hide my smile as they cheered, unzipping the back of my dress, leaving me only in my flowery swimsuit.

I ran after them, and the weight from the anxiety earlier immediately began to clear. As I laughed, running across the grass among the other children, the weight disappeared more and more until it was completely gone. We finally reached the pool, and jumped in at the same time, sending large splashes of water over the people beside the pool.

But we didn't care. As we pulled each other under water and splashed one another in the face, nothing seemed to matter.

In that split moment-it felt like one of my daydreams was coming to life again. I was living like other kids now...but this time it was real.

It didn't feel like anyone was watching us. It didn't feel like Aki was drifting away from us. Playing with him now, I felt stupid from even thinking such a thing.

It was moments like these that I wished would last forever.

******************************

"That was so much fun!" Beatrice said excitedly, after we had spent over thirty minutes in the water. We climbed out of the pool, and I gasped, remembering my hair.

"NOO...This is gonna be a nightmare to comb out now". I touched my thick drooping afro bun, annoyed that I had forgotten all about it.

"I'll help you," Beatrice offered, "When we get back".

"Once it's dry it's gonna be all tangled up which is gonna be a nightmare to comb".

Did you expect to come to a pool party without getting your hair wet? Aki signed, smirking.

"Honestly, I thought I'd be able to manage it". I admitted.

"Hey, Aki! Why don't you come, let me introduce you to some friends". Amber called from the other side of the pool, sitting alongside Katie and some other girls.

My heart dropped when he signed that he would be back, and then jogged over to them looking rather shy and flustered.

"Wow, he basically just ditched us again," Beatrice voiced my thoughts as she dried her hair with a towel. I watched as Aki did the peace sign with the girls, as they took a group selfie with Amber's phone.

I sighed, before throwing the towel over my head, hiding my face which had an expression of total disappointment. As I continued staring at the group from the corner of my eye, I noticed two boys behind them, laughing and talking about something as they stared at Beatrice and I.

I stopped rubbing my hair with the towel, and looked up at them. As they were on the other side of the pool, I couldn't hear what they were saying.

"Hey," I nudged Beatrice who was putting a layer of sunscreen on her legs. She stopped when I called her. I nodded over to the boys. "What are they talking about"?

Beatrice noticed their hidden glances and furrowed her eyebrows. "Ignore them. It's just gossip".

"Do you know who they are"?

"No. Everyone here is from your school, aren't they? Aren't kids always talking about someone else"?

"Still. I don't like what they are doing".

"Go and talk to them, Jemimah".

"Are you kidding me? It would cause drama!"

"You're in school. Drama's gonna happen, whether you like it or not, Jemimah. Get out there for once. Besides, if you can plunge into that pool, you've already let your confidence run free today. Let's see how much further you can take it". Beatrice was right. I did feel a lot more confident today. If confidence led to those small moments of pure carelessness and freedom...maybe I should try it out more.

"Right. I'm doing it". I got up, throwing my towel on the chair.

Beatrice's face lit up with excitement. "Yes! You go, Jemmy!"

I half smiled, ignoring the nerves that still tingled inside of me. But they weren't as strong as usual.

I went round to the other side of the pool, but the boys seemed to have moved onto something else, as they were looking down at their phones by the time I got to them, and so didn't seem to notice me. Okay, they weren't talking about us now. Maybe I should go.

No.

I hit my cheeks a few times with my palms, and then glanced over at Beatrice, who gave me a thumbs up. Then I took a deep breath, and stood in front of the boys.

"Hey". Oh my God. Did I just say that? Was I seriously talking to them?

They both stopped and looked up at me, and I knew they were slightly surprised that I had approached them.

"What're you guys talking about"? I asked, surprised that my chest didn't tighten as I thought it would. Just breathe, Jemimah. Hopefully, this wasn't going to kill me or anything.

"What"? One of them raised their eyebrow at me, "We weren't talking about you, so what do you want"?

I felt like turning around and just leaving it. But I'd come all this way...I clenched my fists. If I did walk away, it would make me feel like an idiot for coming to them in the first place."I'm not buying that. I saw you looking at me and my friend when we were coming out of the pool".

One of them snickered. "Oh nothing...it wasn't about you..." They were both snickering now. One of them looked back at their phone, and frantically started texting something. I furrowed my eyebrows, as a lump seemed to rise in my throat. They were seriously doing that in front of me, because they knew I probably wouldn't say anything about it.

That's what so many people expected from me. That I was too timid to speak up. And for a long time I was. But this felt like the last straw...

"Hey! I'm talking to you". Without thinking, I snatched his phone from his hands, making us both shocked. Stupid Jemimah.

What's that going to do? You just made everything worse.

"Hey, you can't just take that!" The boy's eyes widened.

"Sorry!" I was about to hand it back to him, but then I spotted the image on the screen, making me freeze.

I stared at the screen, my eyes widening, as I saw the picture of Beatrice and I running towards the pool, Aki cropped out of it. It had been sent to a group chat, with the caption; Africa over there needs to go back to the jungle. And wth is the dough face doing here? She doesn't even go to our school :/

My jaw dropped, just as the boy snatched the phone back from me. He had a joking look on his face, as if this was funny. "Alright, you caught us," he held his hands up in mock surrender. "We were talking about you. But did you expect to come to an all white party and not get talked about, though? I mean, let's be serious about thi..."

I turned and began to walk away. I was tired of it. I was tired of people treating me like garbage, and I was tired of never being able to do anything about it. I was tired of Uncle Philip, of Katie, of Amber...of so many of the kids around here. I thought that the outside world was going to be friendly to me, and welcome me into it's open arms, after I'd been secluded for years. But I was dead wrong.

Suddenly, I turned back around to face the boys who both had amused expressions on their faces. It was out of anger, and I wasn't thinking. It came before I could even stop it.

Perhaps it was the anger I had swallowed down every time I had been treated like dirt in my life. The subduing urge to fight back battling against my constant fear.

Perhaps Katie was right about my true colours showing. I had no idea what my true colours looked like, but I did know that there was a part of me that I didn't know existed-and it had been wanting to show itself.

Because I did not regret anything, as my palm landed hard on the side of that boy's face, echoing loudly, and causing several heads to turn.

I looked around, my hand sizzling with the pain inflicted from the harshness of the slap. People stared at me, stunned, and I thought I'd start to feel embarrassed. I was simply just shocked by my own actions.

The boy held his cheek and blinked a few times, his friend staring from him to me, speechless like everyone else.

"I...I..." I didn't know what to say. But I didn't have to say anything, when the boy grabbed my arm.

"YOU UGLY LITTLE..."

"Reuben, stop!" Someone yelled from the crowd, just as he brought up his fist, pulling me towards him.

"I'll kill you!" He screamed, before flying a fist straight towards me.

But not before Aki threw himself towards him, tackling him straight to the ground, and throwing a hard punch across Reuben's face. Still stunned, I collapsed to the ground, near where Reuben lay, and Aki sat on top of him.

Aki's hazel brown eyes glazed with anger. Something I had never seen before.Then I heard it.

"D..don't..."

Aki stammered, making my eyes widen and my heart skip a beat.

"D...don't you ever...t...touch Jemimah...again".

"Sometimes you discover parts of yourself you never knew you had".