2 NEW TEXT MESSAGES FROM MR. STALKER AT 7:57PM

Mr. Stalker: Hey.

Mr. Stalker: Hiiiiiiiiii.

Me: What is your problem now?

Mr. Stalker: Is that the way you greet someone?

Me: Not everyone, certain people.

Mr. Stalker: Certain people as in? . . .

Me: People I dislike.

Mr. Stalker: . . .anyways, I have a question.

Me: Mkay, shoot.

Mr. Stalker: What's missing: A, E, __, O, U?

Me: I.

Mr. Stalker: What's the opposite of hate?

Me: Love.

Mr. Stalker: What's the opposite of me?

Me: A successful person.

Mr. Stalker: I'm heartbroken.

Me: Congratulations
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