Warning: Mention of abuse

On their third day in Newcastle, which was also their last, John had planned a surprise for Mark. It was already 1 o'clock in the afternoon when they walked through the streets of the city. John held a map in his hands and looked for the way. Mark had often told him that he should just tell him where they were going and he could tell him the way, but John ignored him, giggling. They wandered through the city for half an hour before John finally found what he was looking for. They stopped on the wide sidewalk. The curly-headed man raised his head and looked at a huge building surrounded by a large garden and fenced with a black metal fence. The house was very large and made of sandstone. John smiled, it looked nice. In the garden of the house there were many people and colourful balloons. John noticed that Mark had let go of his hand, so he turned around and looked at him in surprise.

"Honey?" He asked quietly and reached for Mark's hand. Mark's hands were shaking violently as he stared at the building with wide eyes. "Mark?" John reached out and placed his hand on Mark's cheek. The smaller man flinched.

"What are we doing here?" Mark gasped, not taking his eyes off the building.

"Today is open day at the children's home. I read it on some flyers. All former children are welcome and I thought you might want to go too while we're still here." John smiled. Mark lowered his head and looked down at his feet before shaking his head vigorously.

"No. I don't want to." Tears formed in his eyes, but John didn't notice.

"Oh come on, Mark! It'll be fun! You'll probably meet some of your old friends or something! At least try! If you still don't like it when we see it, we can always leave." Mark sighed and took a shuddering breath.

"You...you're staying with me, right?" John looked at him blankly.

"Yes? Of course I'm coming. Why do you ask?" Mark reached out his hand, shaking, and took John's. He laced their fingers together and took a deep breath.

*

The two soon found themselves in the garden in front of the children's home. There were lots of children playing in bouncy castles, but also lots of adults talking to each other. Mark held John's hand tightly in his and didn't let go. John didn't say anything, though. They got drinks and then stood at a bar table.

"See? It's actually quite nice here." John smiled, enjoying the sun on his face. Mark sighed.

"Mark?" A man walked towards them. "Damn it! It's him! Mark Knopfler!" John turned around and looked at the man who was holding the hand of a young woman who was obviously pregnant. Mark turned around and looked at him too. A smile formed on his lips.

"Hey! Eric!" The two fell into each other's arms and laughed hysterically. John smiled gently.

"How are you, buddy? You look emaciated!" Eric laughed and patted Mark's back. "God, we haven't seen each other in ages! When was the last time? '70? Damn." Mark laughed and hugged him again.

"I think it was 1970, yes. You look good, Eric!" The brunette man laughed.

"What brings you here? The last time we met, you told me you moved to London." Mark smiled.

"Yes. I still live in London. I took a short trip to 'Castle, you know?" The two men smiled. "Oh, how rude of me." Mark rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "This is John." John smiled and held out his hand. "And this is Eric and his wife Patty Clapton." Mark said. John gave them both his hand and smiled. "I see there's a baby on the way, huh?" Mark teased and looked at the woman's belly. She blushed a little, but smiled. "How far along are you, Patty?"

"Seventh month." She beamed proudly.

"Congratulations." John smiled and gave her his hand again.

"Thank you." She giggled.

"Patty and Eric met a few weeks after Eric came out of the children's home." Mark smiled. John nodded understandingly. "Damn, you've been a couple for ages." Eric laughed. "I'll get us some drinks!" With that, Mark ran off. John smiled after him. Suddenly Mark was himself again and didn't seem to be afraid anymore.

"You and Mark..." Eric began carefully. John leaned against the bar table and smiled gently:

"We're a couple, yes."

"Oh." Patty said quietly. John looked at her questioningly. "Sorry! I didn't mean to be rude! It's just that I always thought Mark liked women, you know?"

"He likes both, my love." Eric giggled bluntly, which made John giggle. "How long have you been together?"

"About three months." John smiled. "We met my parents in Leicester and then made a detour to Newcastle. He wanted to show me a few things here." Eric nodded and smiled. "Can I ask why you know each other?"

"Oh, of course!" Eric giggled. "I'm 4 years older than Mark. I never met my parents. When Mark came to the children's home, it was my last year here. But I stayed two years longer and worked here." John nodded understandingly. Mark came back with the drinks.

"Would you like to sit on the chairs there?" Mark asked, pointing to a table with chairs. "I thought it might be more comfortable for Patty than standing." Patty smiled gently and so they set off. They sat down and talked about many different things. Before they knew it, two hours had already passed.

"Mark, I tried to find out your new address, but I couldn't." Eric laughed. Mark giggled and took out a piece of paper to write down his address and phone number. "Me and Patty wanted to ask you something important." He said quietly. "I know we haven't seen each other in years. But now that Patty is pregnant and we're going to have a child soon, we wanted to ask you if you would like to be Godfather to our child." Mark stared at him with his mouth open, looking like a fish that had been pulled out of its aquarium. "Of course only if you want to, but you're our first choice." Mark lowered his head and felt tears in his eyes. John slowly reached out his hand and placed it on Mark's thigh.

"You...you want me to be the Godfather of your child?" Mark whispered in a quiet voice.

"Of course mate! You're my best and oldest friend! And if there's anyone I trust to take care of my child, it's you." Mark smiled slightly.

"I don't know anything about children."

"Neither do we." Patty giggled. Eric placed his hand on Mark's knee.

"Mark, I want you to be the one raising my child if something happens to me and Patty. And you know yourself how quickly it can happen. One stupid car accident and the child's alone. I don't want my child to have to grow up in a hell like that." Eric pointed to the big house. "And you know yourself why." Mark nodded silently and smiled gently at Eric. He hugged him tightly. "Is that a yes?" Eric smiled.

"Of course it is, you idiot!" Mark laughed and wiped a tear from his cheek before hugging Patty too. "Do you know what it is yet?"

"It's a boy." Patty smiled.

"Oh. Really? Do you have names yet?" Mark smiled.

"Brian Mark Clapton." Patty said, smiling and putting a hand on her round belly. Mark's eyes widened and he looked at Eric with big eyes. "We mean it, you idiot!" The group laughed.

*

After another hour, Eric and Patty headed home, as Patty was very tired. They agreed to meet for the baby shower in a few months. John and Mark walked through the children's home and looked inside the house when a man suddenly called out for Mark. Mark held John's hand tightly before telling him to get out of the house. John looked at him worriedly, but did as he was told, but when John was out of reach, things escalated. The man, James, started shouting at Mark and insulting him. Just like he had done many years ago. Soon two other men joined them, who had been James' friends back then. Mark defended himself as best he could, but he didn't stand a good chance against three of them, alone.

"Just like back then!" James laughed and kicked Mark's side, who was lying on the floor, curled up in a ball. Mark tried so hard not to shed a tear. "You're the same fucking faggot you were back then! I bet you liked it when me and the guys fucked you, huh!?"

"You raped me!" Mark screamed. Tears were streaming down his cheeks. He was unable to hold them back. "You made my life hell in here and what the hell was it for!?" Mark managed to get to his wobbly legs and held onto the door frame.

"We had fun." James laughed. "It was a lot of fucking fun using you as a slut. Want to try it again, huh?" He walked towards Mark. One of his hands unzipped his pants. Mark's eyes widened and his survival instinct kicked in. Adrenaline rushed through his body as he grabbed the poker from the fireplace and slammed it into James' head. The man immediately passed out. Blood was running from a slit on his head. Mark's eyes widened as he looked down at the man. The other two ran away quickly, but did not shout for help. Mark dropped the poker and ran out of the house, sobbing. He then collapsed on the side of the house and sat on the lawn. Tears ran down his cheeks as he desperately tried to calm himself down. John found him like this. Sitting on the ground, arms wrapped around his knees, crying.

"Oh my God, honey! What happened!" He cried out worriedly and ran towards Mark. He quickly sat down on the grass and wrapped his arms around Mark's body. John sat cross-legged and pulled Mark onto his lap. With his left hand he rubbed Mark's lower back, with the other he held the back of his head. Mark sobbed into John's shoulder and clung to him. "Sh. I'm here." John hummed, rocking him gently. "I'm here and I love you. I will never leave you. Sh. Sh. Don't cry. Don't cry." He whispered. Mark cried the tears he had hidden inside himself for the last 21 years. He placed a shaking hand on the facade of the building and sobbed.

"It happened here, John." He sobbed brokenly. "Multiple times." John looked at him blankly.

"What happened? What do you mean?" He asked worriedly.

"I love you." Mark sobbed, clinging to him. "Please never do to me what they did to me." He hiccupped from crying. "Please."

"Mark, my darling." John gently brushed strands of hair from his face. "I will never hurt you. Ever. Do you hear me?" Mark hiccupped. Tears rolled down his cheeks, the sobbing had stopped. John kissed his lips gently. "I love you. What the hell happened in there? And what do you mean they did something to you? What on earth happened?" John asked worriedly. Mark leaned against John's chest, whimpering, but didn't say a word.

*

At the end of the day, they both found themselves in the hotel room. It was the last night before they would go back to London. John had hoped to have sex with Mark for the first time, but after the younger man had cried all afternoon, John was no longer in the mood either. He had gently pulled Mark to him. Mark had fallen asleep from exhaustion in no time, clinging to John's nightshirt with his left fist.

"What have they done to you, my darling?" John breathed worriedly, stroking the back of Mark's head with his hand. "I love you so much and I promise you, that no one will ever hurt you as long as I live. You never have to be afraid again of whatever happened back then. I love you." Mark moved weakly in his sleep and pressed his face closer to John's chest. The taller man smiled softly and closed his eyes, holding the love of his life in his arms.