Mabilis na bumaba ng sasakyan si Andie upang pagbuksan ng backdoor ng kotse si Don Miguel. As soon as she opened the backdoor, Crawford emerged from the car. Sumunod na bumaba ng kotse si Don Miguel. The old man was holding a bouquet of red carnations. 

Nang tuluyan itong makababa ng kotse, inayos nito ang puting coat nito at  fedora hat bago bumaling sa kanya. 

"Come me veo? (How do I look?)" anito, nakangiti. 

"Te ves genial, Señor (You look fine, Sir)," mabilis niyang sagot, nakangiti.

Ngumiti lang ulit ito bago tuluyang naglakad patungo sa musoleo na nasa harapan nila. The Don was visiting his late wife's grave. It was an awful car accident that took the life of Doña Alicia De Braganza.  Ang sabi ni Crawford, mahigit sampung taon na raw nang pumanaw ang asawa ni Don Miguel. But the old man remained faithful to his wife-- visiting the mausoleum on special occassions like today. It's the wedding anniversary of the don and his dead wife. But the don continued to celebrate the special day even if his wife had long passed.

The don still adores his wife. Patunay niyon ang pananatili ng napakalaking portrait ni Doña Alicia sa sala ng mansiyon ng mga De Braganza. Hindi iyon pinatanggal ni Don Miguel o inilipat man lang sa kahit na anong parte ng mansiyon kahit na anong pilit ng mga anak nito. She heard one time that for the don, Doña Alicia is still the queen of the mansion and his heart.

It was a love story that goes beyond the grave.  

At manhid lang ang hindi maiinggit sa debosyon ng matandang don sa namayapa nitong asawa. In this world where heart and relationships get broken all the time, there are still love stories like Don Miguel's and Doña Alicia's that stood the test of times even death. 

Marahang inilapag ni Don Miguel ang dala nitong bulaklak sa marmol na nitso, bago tinanggal ang suot nitong sumbrero. 

"Estoy aquí de nuevo, mi querida (I am here again, my dear)," anito bago yumuko.

She saw the dons' mouth quivered, whispering something. If he was praying or what, she doesn't know. But she sincerely  wished that those words would reach the other side for Doña Alicia to hear. 

Maya-maya pa, humagulgol na ang don habang patuloy sa pagsasalita. Hindi niya gaanong maintidihan dahil malalalim na salita ang gamit nito. But she can feel the anguish in his voice.  That's the third time she had see the don that vulnerable. 

Well, everybody weeps when it comes to love. Sabi nga nila, kung nagmamahal ka, dapat, handa ka ring masaktan. 

She looked away and smiled bitterly. She remembered how she barely made it for the last two weeks since she saw Dax again. How she forced to teach her heart not to long for people who were never meant to be with her nor for things she cannot have. How she exhaust herself to work so that at night,she'd just sleep and won't think of Dax. And how she prayed and begged God for the feeling to go away. For the feeling to fade. For her heart to forget.

But how can you unfeel love? How can you let go of someone that was never yours in the first place? How can you teach your heart to forget when every beat of it remembers the love that was never yours?

How?

"Andrea?" anang Don maya-maya. Agad siyang bumaling dito. Kunot ang noo nito habang nakatingin sa kanya. "Are you okay?"

Kumurap siya. "S-Si, Señor," alanganin niyang sagot bago naguguluhang bumaling kay Crawford. Crawford mouthed wipe your tears.

Mabilis niyang kinapa ang pisngi niya. Basa iyon. 

Shit! Umiiyak siya nang hindi niya alam!

"E-estoy bien, Señor," mabilis niyang sagot bago yumuko at nagpunas ng pisngi. "There's just something in my eye. I-It stings. L-lo siento," pagdadahilan niya. 

"Bueno," ani Don Miguel bago muling bumaling sa marmol na puntod ng asawa nito. 

She spent the next few minutes scolding her self. She's not supposed to cry at work. Heck, she's not supposed to cry period!

Protectors don't cry. She was trained to endure pain even beyond it. 

But here she is, getting defeated by her heart. 

She really is hopeless. 

Hapon na nang lisanin ni Don Miguel ang musoleo. Hindi na sila bumalik sa opisina nito. Dumiretso na sila pauwi sa mansiyon. Nagpahanda ng dinner ang don. In memory of Doña Alicia. 

The don invited them to dinner. All three of them. Siya, Si Crawford at si Fischer. Hindi kasi nakarating sa hapunan ang mga anak nito. 

"Isn't your birthday coming this weekend?" tanong ni Don Miguel habang umiinom sila ng wine sa pool side ng mansiyon. Doon nag-aya ang don matapos ang dinner. 

It's a little over nine in the evening pero mukhang walang balak ang don na pauwiin pa sila. Kung sabagay, it really gets lonely living in a big house sometimes. 

"Si Señor," sagot niya bago sumimsim sa ng alak sa wine glass na hawak niya. She was taking it slow, magda-drive pa siya pauwi sa apartment niya. "H-how did you know?" takang tanong niya. 

"It's a work habit of mine to get to know the people who are working for me," ani Don Miguel. "I know Crawford and Fischer's too," dugtong pa nito in a heavy spanish accent. Tipid siyang ngumiti bago tumango-tango. "Don't you want to have a vacation?"

Napadiretso siya ng upo sa kinauupuan niya. "Excuse me, Sir?"

Ngumiti ito.  "It seemed that you are working so hard lately. Take some days off work. You may return after five days," anunsiyo ng don bago inubos ang laman na alak ng hawak nitong baso. "Take that as my birthday gift to you," dugtong pa nito bago ibinaba ang baso sa mesa.

"B-but--" Naguguluhan siyang napatingin kina Crawford at Fischer. Tumango lang dalawa bilang pagsang-ayon. 

"I'd give them the same gift when it's their turn," sabi pa ni Don Miguel. 

Napangiti na siya. Now she understands why the don has a lot of loyal employees.  Kilala nito ang mga empleyado nito. Hindi gaya ng mga ibang amo na masuwelduhan lang ang tauhan, tapos na ang obligasyon ng mga ito sa empleyado. But Don Miguel is different. He's not just a business man. He is a leader. An admirable one. No wonder  nagtagal si Crawford dito. 

Maya-maya pa, nagpaalam na ang don. Inaantok na raw ito. Inihatid mismo ni Crawford si Don Miguel sa kuwarto nito. Matapos niyon, kinausap ni Crawford ang iba pang bodyguards na maiiwan for the night. It was a protocol for the head of security. Kinausap din sila nito ni Fischer tungkol sa schedule adjustments nila dahil wala siya sa susunod na limang araw. When everything is settled,  nagkanya-kanya handa na sila sa pag-uwi. 

"Will you have a vacation somewhere?" tanong agad ni Crawford bago ito sumakay sa sasakyan nito. Magkatabi lang sa parking space ang mga sasakyan nila. Si Fischer naman, nauna na. 

She smiled. "I don't know yet," naiiling na sagot niya. It was true. She's not yet sure where she'll spend the next 5 days without work. "Why do you ask?" dugtong niya, binuksan ang pinto ng driver's seat ng kotse niya. 

Crawford just stared at her for a while. It seemed like he wanted to her something but he's struggling if he would. 

"Senior?" untag niya rito maya-maya. 

Nagbuga ito ng hininga. "I have a woman."

Kumurap siya. "Y-you're married, Sir?"

Ngumiti ito, malungkot. "No. I cannot marry her... yet. I also have a daughter. "

She controlled her gasp. Dahan-dahan din niyang isinara ang pinto ng kotse niya. "B-but we're not supposed t-to--"

"I know. But... It's my decision to have them... in secret."

She didn't know what to say. Kilala niya si Crawfrord. Seryoso ito sa trabaho. The man followed the rules by the book. He doesn't look like a man who'd do something against the rules. 

Lumapit ito sa kanya at binuksan ang cellphone nito. On the wallpaper, she saw a not so clear picture of a little girl in pigtails playing in a sandbox. "This is my daughter, Charlotte. She's around five year old." 

"She's pretty," sabi niya. 

Ngumiti si Crawford bago muling bumaling ang tingin sa screen ng cellphone nito. 

"Yes she is," anito. "I haven't actually met her. I just grabbed this photo online from her mother's neighbor in Oklahoma," paliwanag nito, may pait sa tinig.

He heart sank looking at the man's face. She saw longing and desperation. 

Mali siya. Crawford has been following the rules since five years ago when his daughter was born. Hindi pa nito nakikita ang anak nito. She can just imagine the agony this senior protector must be having all for the call of their duty. 

"Why don't you just... visit them secretly?" she suggested. 

Umiling ito. "Integrity, Cortez. You do the right thing even if no one's watching." Tumango-tango siya. It's one thing they were taught of in schooling. "Besides, the rule was made just around 15 years ago when Chief took over the agency. It wasn't always like that. Protectors were allowed to marry and have a normal life with a family."

"But why--"

Crawford chuckled. "Ask your guardian," putol nito sa kanya.

Kumurap siya. "W-why are you telling me this, Sir?" lakas-loob niyang tanong maya-maya. 

He heaved a deep sigh. "I will be retiring this year. I want you to take over my post."

Pinanlakihan siya ng mata. "B-but Fischer is older than me. He must be--"

"Fischer will soon be serving his ultimate client. I received the notice. He still doesn't know though." 

"But Don Miguel is not my ultimate client, Sir. What if my ultimate client calls me and--"

"You've already trained the new protectors when that happens. Trust me, Andie. You'd make a great senior protector in my post," putol ulit nito sa kanya bago marahang tinapik ang balikat niya. 

The idea overwhelmed her. It excites and scares her at the same time. 

"T-thank you Sir for the trust," alanganing sabi niya maya-maya. 

Ngumiti lang ito. "Now off you go. Enjoy that vacation. You deserve it," anito bago muling bumalik sa kotse nito. Nauna itong umalis sa kanya. 

Naiwan siyang nag-iisip. Hindi tungkol sa pagiging senior protector niya bago matapos ang taon. She was thinking about the reason why Chief made the rule about protectors not having a family  while still in active service.

-----

Masayang minaniobra ni Andie ang sasakyan niya papasok sa compound ng The Organization or for the world, Golden Meadows Dairy Farm. The fresh mountain-side breeze greeted her. She missed being there. Mula nang grumaduate siya sa AP Program mahigit isang taon na ang nakararaan, hindi na siya muling nakabalik pa doon. Ngayon pa lang. 

Kararating pa lang niya sa Maryland kaninang umaga. She decided to spend her 5-day vacation there. Wala naman siya kasi mahila kina Kevin at Ivan na sumama sa bakasyon niya sana sa Pilipinas that's why she chose to go home-- to The Organization. 

Besides, birthday ni Chief bukas. She wanted to surprise him. 

Agad niyang ipinarada ang rented car niya sa parking space. Kinuha rin niya ang dala niyang cake sa backseat bago tuluyang bumaba ng sasakyan.  She was wearing her casual clothes- a pair of jeans, plain blouse, and loafers. Plus a simple coat to beat the cold. 

Pagdating sa entrada ng building, sinalubong siya ulit ng karton ng mga gatas. She smiled. It's still funny to her that a secret security ageny is operating behind the name of a dairy farm. 

She stood on the sliding door and waited for it to open. Nang bumukas ang heavily tinted sliding door, mabils na gumana ang identity scanner. After a few seconds, nagsalita na ang automated voice ng, "Welcome, Protector Cortez."

Agad siyang humakbang papasok ng reception area. She breathe in the familiar scent of the place. Just the mere scent brought back memories. Lots of it. 

She was greeted by an unfamiliar receptionist. "What can I do for you Protector Cortez?"

"I'm here to see the Chief," masayang sabi niya. 

Ngumiti lang ang receptionist bago tinuro ang lift na nasa bandang kanan nito. 

"Thanks!" sabi niya bago  humakbang patungo sa lift.

The lifts beneath the trick wall are for APs only, so she had to use the one outside. Buti na lang wala siyang kasabay. 

Pagdating niya sa upper floor, nakita niya agad ang control room. It's till a chaos there. Paper chaos. She was about to walk towards Chief's office when she saw De Rossi, Chief's security detial, standing in the middle of the control room watching a feed from somewhere. 

That's odd, she thought. 

 Ni minsan hindi pa niya nakita si De Rossi na nanood ng feed ng kung ano mang kaso sa loob ng control room. De Rossi is always with Chief. 

Well, mas maganda na rin 'yon. De Rossi won't spoil her surprise to Chief. 

Nagkibit-balikat siya at itinuloy ang paghakbang sa hallway, patungo sa opisina ni Chief. 

A few steps before Chief's office, she heard voices inside the room. Lalo niyang minadali ang paglalakad. She was about to push open the door when she heard the voices again. 

"No, my decision won't change." That was Chief. 

"But Sir--"

That's a familiar voice, she thought.

"I'm warning you!  I will expell you from The Org Lavigne kung ipipilit mo ang gusto mo!" 

She froze. Her eyes widened in shock. 

Chief was talking to Dax. Hindi siya puwedeng magkamali. 

"Andie has decided. It was her choice. You can't do anything about it," si Chief.

What has she decided on? She can't recall she has decided on something that involves Dax.

Tinambol na ng kaba ang dibdib niya. 

"You were never meant to be, Lavigne."

"You don't know that."

"I raised her as my own. I know what's best for her."

She covered her mouth with her hand and swallowed the painful lump in her throat. She felt Dax's pain.

Kailan pa ito nakikipag-usap kay Chief tungkol sa kanila? Bakit wala itong sinasabi sa kanya?

"Sinabihan ninyo ako noon, na hindi dapat malaman ni Andrea ang tungkol sa nararamdaman ko sa kanya. Sir, nagtiis ako. Ginawa ko ang sinabi ninyo kahit na alam kong magiging kumplikado. Dahil alam ko, kung mayroon mang isang taong pinakamahalaga ang opinyon tungkol sa amin, ikaw 'yon. Andrea adores you like a father. Making you proud is her purpose why she entered the agency. I kept everything you did, Sir. I stayed true to my promise, on what you wanted. I did my part. Every single thing you told me. You told me to wait for 10 years and I am willing to do that. Kahit na hindi ako sigurado. Kahit na wala akong pinanghahawakan. Bakit ngayon malalaman kong ipapakasal niyo na siya sa iba? Where's my fair chance on that?"

Kasal? 

She's not marrying anyone!

And then she realized....

Regalo ko 'yan sa birthday mo.

Niyuko niya ang singsing na bigay ni Kevin sa kanya. It was just a gift. It's just a gift wasn't it?

"Y-you're wearing a ring.... Why?... S'il te plait ne, Andrea."

Nakagat na niya ang pang-ibabang labi niya. Nagtuloy-tuloy na ang pagtulo ng luha niya. Confusion drowned her. 

"Sir, I love Andrea. Kung hindi niyo po siya maibibigay pa sa akin sa ngayon, h'wag niyo naman po siyang ibigay sa iba," Dax pleaded, pain in his voice.

She closed her eyes as deep pain shot across her chest. She stood there for a while before she slowly walked away. Humigpit na ang kapit niya sa box ng cake na hawak niya. Wala na siyang pakialam kung masira iyon. She was so distraught and confused. 

Wala sa sarili siyang bumalik sa parking space. Her hands were shaking but she managed to maneuver the car out of the agency. Nang makalayo siya, she hit the breaks and started to cry.

Now she's not sure anymore, what is the truth and what is a lie. ###

2686words/07:00pm/09232021