THIRD PERSON

As her eyes cracked open, the first thing that hit her wasn't sunlight, but a hangover so fierce, it felt like her brain had decided to throw its very own, very noisy after-party.

"Akong ulo murag muliki!" She sharply hissed.

At least dili imong liki murag gi-ulo.

Napabangon ang dalaga sabay kapkap ng sarili niyang katawan. Her clothes were still intact and she was wearing a black suit coat. She was about to panic when she inhaled a familar scent from the coat. Napahinga siya nang maluwag sabay ikot ng paningin niya sa kabuoan ng kwarto.

Through the transparent veil of the see-through curtain, all she could see were the towering windows made of glass. Lying there, she couldn't help but notice the expansive view of the sky, which led her to believe she was in a penthouse.

Sa kabila ng sakit ng ulo niya ay una niya pa ring hinanap ang phone niya. She flipped the pillows and bed comforter only to see it on the bed side table. Pagbukas niya tumambad sa kanya ang napakaraming missed calls at messages sa mga kaibigan niya.

First was Kassidy, she's got about fifty-one missed calls and ten messages. She was asking her if totoo bang fiancé niya nga ang lalaking sumundo sa kanya kagabi, kung hindi ay tatawag siya ng pulis. Scrolling through her messages, it was also about simping how goodlooking her fiancé was. Nakatuhog daw siya ng daddy.

Arianne on the other hand has thirty missed calls and twenty messages asking her if may kapatid ba na engineer ang fiancé niya at kung anong lahi niya. She even asked if ano ang trabaho ng lalaki at kung nabugha na daw ang kiffy niya.

"What the hell, Arianne?" Ismid niya. Sachal learned Bisaya from Arianne, and although she can only speak a few words, she understands what she means.

Ang may pinaka-normal na tanong lang 'ata sa kanila ay si Fejia. She only has ten missed calls and five messages asking if she came home safe. She was complimented that she chose a mature guy to date and approved of him.

"What the heck?" When she clicked a file attached to Fejia's message, she found a complete wedding plan prepared for her. Nalaglag na lang ang panga niya. From the venue to the catering, the wedding dress and suit, invitations—even the designs, cakes, and event flow were already prepared.

It wasn't that shocking kasi event organizer naman ang work ni Fejia pero she managed to prepare all that within just a few hours of learning she already had a fiancé?

Itinabi niya na ang muna ang phone niya dahil pakiramdam niya kumikirot lang lalo ang ulo niya. She had no plans to make the wedding grand because the person she will me marrying is not just someone you could announce to the whole world. Baka mamaya sa mismong araw ng kasal nila bagsakan sila ng missile, edi naging lamay bigla!

She was about to leave the bed when she noticed an orange paper bag on the floor. When she checked what was inside, she found a white shirt, undergarments, and a pair of pink fluffy bunny slippers. Kunot noo niyang binasa ang maliit na sticky note na nakadikit sa tsinelas.

"Good morning, love. I'm unsure about your size, but I hope it fits you. Come down for breakfast. I will introduce you to my kids." She bit her lip. Sa hindi malamang dahilan ay bigla siyang kinabahan.

Will he let her meet his kids? She had never been in a relationship before, let alone getting married and becoming someone's mother? That's too much pressure for her.

"Bahala na." She mumbled before going to the bathroom and washing her face.

Habang naghihilamos naman siya ay pilit niyang inaalala kung ano ang nangyari kagabi. Sa tuwing nalalasing kasi siya nang sobra ay kung ano-ano na lang ginagawa niya. She's an unhinged bitch.

Last time she was drunk in a party in LA, she was reported missing by Distaunce after falling asleep in a tree for hours. Paggising niya ay nalaman niya na lang may nawawalang babae at sumama pa siya para maghanap without knowing na siya pala ang hinahanap.

There was also a time when she turned the public party in Madrid into her personal kissing booth. Lahat ng lalaking tingin niya na may girlfriend ay nilagyan niya ng kiss mark sa shirt. She almost looks like a street criminal moving swiftly with her lips touching their shirts without them noticing.

Can you imagine the drama? Boyfriends scrambling for excuses and girlfriends turning detective? The chaos level? Legendary. A lot of relationships ended because of what she did. If given another chance, she will do it again.

"I didn't do anything stupid last night, did I?" Tanong niya sa sarili matapos magmumog. Kapagkuwan ay napalabi na lang siya dahil wala naman siyang maalala.

She wasted no time and tied her hair into a messy bun before wearing the undergarments he bought for her. Napasinghal na lang siya nang mapansing saktong-sakto ito sa kanya. "Just how expert is he to know my exact size? Ganon ba kapag libo na ang body count?" She scoffed and wore the oversized white shirt.

"Well, at least cute ng slippers." She beamed. Doon lang ata siya natuwa.

A breathtaking sight greeted her as she turned the handle and pushed open the bedroom door. Before her, an expansive living room had elegant furniture that screams luxury. Dominating the central wall was an 80-inch television, surrounded by vintage white couches that added elegance. To the left, a dark marble countertop displayed an array of fine wines and liquors, adding an air of sophistication to the space.

Edi siya na mayaman! She thought in her head before walking to the stairs. "A glass stairs?" Hindi niya maiwasang bulong nang makarating siya sa hagdan. From where she stood, she can hear a loud music from below.

Samantalang abala naman sa pagluluto ng lugaw sa baba si Kage ay naisipan niyang tawagan ang lalaking nagpaalam sa kanya ng kaganapan kagabi. He still have questions for him.

"You called?" The man from the other line mused as if he was already expecting a call from him early in the morning.

"What are you doing back there?" Walang prenong tanong ni Kage rito. Bahagyang natawa ang lalaki sa kabilang linya.

"You wouldn't believe me even if I say it was only a coincidence?" Kage rested his left arm on the kitchen counter before gritting his teeth.

"Fuck off, Amadeo." He warned. "If you appear in front of her again, I will plant a bullet in your skull." Imbis matakot sa banta ay napailing na lang si Geometry.

"If you invite us to your wedding, I'll consider it." He grimaced. Akmang ibababa na ni Kage ang tawag nang bigla itong nagsalita.

"I already took care of everything. You owe me this time. I'm expecting you to re—" He did not even let him finish his words and just ended the call with his brows furrowed.

When Geometry said he took care of everything, that meant taking down the videos uploaded to the internet with her wife on it. Kahit yung mga videos na hindi na-upload ay burado na rin sa gallery ng may-ari ng phone.

Even if Geometry wouldn't help him, he also had the power to do that. Hindi niya kailangan ng tulong dito. Kaya bilang ganti, he will make sure to break into his security system later and input a virus to keep him busy for days.

"Tiramisu cake?" Natawa si Sachal nang marinig ang tugtog sa baba. Dahil sa naging tawa niya ay napaangat ng tingin si Kage na kasalukuyang tinitikman ang patak ng lugaw na nasa daliri niya.

Tumaas lahat ng dugo sa ulo ng dalaga nang makita si Kage. He was only wearing a grey sweatpants. Topless. Spoon on his left hand. His tongue sticking out to lick his finger.

Kage's breath caught in his throat as he looked at her standing in the center of the staircase. She wore his oversized shirt, the fabric draping delicately over her legs, the adorable bunny slippers he had lovingly chosen—and her messy hair. Dang, what a good morning.

"Come. Eat." He demanded when he finally had the urge to look away.

"I'll pass, I'm not hungry." Tanggi nito. He tilted his head and gave her a small smile. "My apologies. Did that come off as a question?" Sumandok ito ng lugaw sa bowl at nilapag ito sa mesa. He then looks at her.

She couldn't help but feel his piercing eyes pulling her to obey him and join him for a meal. Under his authoritative gaze, she found herself sitting in a chair in front of him. He cooked a simple rice porridge with a sliced boiled egg simmered with gingers and onions.

Saglit na umalis si Kage kaya hinalo-halo niya muna ng kutsara ang lugaw sa harapan niya. Napaangat na lang siya ng tingin nang may ilapag na maliit na bote ng gamot si Kage. "Drink this after eating." Tinigan niya ito. It was a hangover pills.

"Diamond, play :She's crazy but she's mine." The AI named Diamond automatically responded to his request.

Walang ano-ano'y umupo sa silya si Kage at pinanood kumain si Sachal. "How is it? Taste good?" Tumango ito bilang sagot. It was surprisingly good. Hindi niya akalain na marunong pala magluto ang lalaking 'to. She thought he was only good at holding guns and firing them.

She wanted to speak and ask him what happened last night but was too shy. Alam niya sa sarili niya na may ginawa siyang kahiya-hiya kahit hindi niya naalala, wala lang siyang lakas na loob magtanong.

With every bite she takes, his eyes follow, capturing her every move with unnerving precision. Hindi niya mabilang kung ilang beses siyang kumurap-kurap dahil sa mga titig nito. She was trying her best to resist her cheeks from burning lalo na nakalantad sa kanya ang matipuno nitong katawan pero kahit yun ay hindi niya mapigilan.

"Bakit mo ako pinapanood kumain? Hindi ka nagugutom?" Pagbasag niya sa katahimikan. She shot him a brave look. "Why don't you get yourself a food?"

"I'm already looking at one." She choked.

"Beg your pardon?" Patay malisya niyang tanong dahil pakiramdam niya nabingi siya sa sinagot sa kanya ni Kage.

"Awe, sweetheart, you alright?" He handed her a glass of water as if his nonchalant rizz was not to blame.

What the hell is wrong with him? The first time she met him, he was rude and sarcastic. He gives off the vibe that is tiring to have a conversation with. And then he suddenly becomes a fucking leech that clings around her everywhere she goes.

Sometimes, he's the epitome of a gentleman, opening doors and flashing charming smiles that make you think he's straight out of a book. And then suddenly, he does something diabolical that could scare a demon into confession. And now he's rizzing her up out of nowhere? He's a real piece of work!

"May sakit ka ba sa utak?" Huli na nang mapigilan ni Sachal ang sarili niya dahil lumabas na ang katanungang yun sa bibig niya.

"Hmm?" He hummed. For him, it was a random question. Ang alam niya lang ay nag-e-enjoy siyang panoorin ito kumain.

"I remember your cousin saying you went to a psychiatrist, right? What are you diagnosed with? DID? SPD? ADHD?" She asked.

"Oh, that. . ." He leaned his arms on the table and bent down to close the distance between them as if he would say something that required secrecy.

"I have ADHD, darling. I hope that's okay with you." She was about to say something when his mischievous smirk caught her off guard. "A Damn Hard Dick, that is." Her eyes widened in shock, causing him to burst into wheezing laughter.

Namumulang napakuyom ng kamao ang dalaga habang mahigpit na nakahawak sa kutsara. Gusto niya itong tadyakan sa sikmura pero nang makita itong hawak-hawak ang tyan habang tumatawa ay nawala ang inis niya. Akala niya wala ng mas ikakapogi ang mukha niya. Mas nagiging gwapo pala siya kapag tumatawa.

Hinayaan niya na lang ito mamatay kakatawa. Mas pinili niyang inumin ang hangover pill na binigay nito. Dahil hindi siya sanay uminom ng gamot ay hindi niya kayang lunukin ito gamit ang tubig lang. Kaya ang ginawa niya ay kinagat niya muna ang pill hanggang madurog sa bibig niya bago uminom ng tubig. Tumigil sa pagtawa si Kage nang mapansin niya ang ginawa nito.

"So, I thought you would let me meet your kids?" He clapped his hands, his eyes beamed with anticipation as if he was looking forward to meeting them.

"How old are they?"

"They're one year old." She licked her lips. Isang taon pa lang silang tatlo? So triplets? Iniwan ba sa kanya ng nanay ang mga bata? Gosh!

"A second." He stood up, took her bowl, and proceeded to wash them. And now he also wash dishes?

"Don't worry, they're good kids. One of them was a girl, and two were boys." He assured. His head was turned in her direction to look at her.

"You mean to say you're a father of three?" Hindi makapaniwalang bulalas ni Sachal. He quickly nodded his head proudly. Napatigagal si Sachal. She will also become a mother of three?

"Alright, let's go and meet them." Aniya matapos nito maghugas at magsuot ng damit pang-itaas.

He guided her to walk in a nearby room. Parang nawawalang bata na nakasunod si Sachal dito. Iniisip niya kung ano ang dapat na maging reaksyon niya sa oras na mabuksan ang pintong iyon. She was starting to think of the things she will say or do.

She expected to see three cribs with adorable babies inside them when she entered the room—but she was wrong. Instead, the room looks like a forest terrarium. Ang akala niyang tiles na tatapakan niya sa pagpasok ay damuhan. There was even a tree with holes underneath it.

"Snowball! Nibbles! Cabbage!" May lumabas na tatlong koneho. White. Brown. Black.

"Come to daddy!" Lumuhod si Kage at kanya-kanya namang talon ang mga ito sa kanya.

Walang ano-ano'y hindi na nakatiis pa si Sachal at binigyan ng uppercut sa panga ang siraulo. Pagtumba nito sa sahig ay tinanggal ng dalaga ang tsinelas niya at walang inhibisyong pinaghahampas ito kay Kage.

"Bwiset ka! Ilang araw ako nag-overthink kung may ex-wife ka ba dahil may anak ka! I was close to buying books on how to become a good mother tapos malaman-laman ko mga rabbit lang pala ang mga anak na sinasabi mong tangina ka?!" Sa lakas ng hampas niya ay napapaigik na lang sa sakit ang binata. He couldn't defend himself from her legendary slipper attack.

"Why can't you be more specific, huh?!" Sa inis ay hinila niya ang kaliwang paa ni Kage at kinaladkad ito palabas ng kwarto. She will give him a good beating! Ibalik niya yung ilang oras niyang pag-o-overthink!

"Help me! Your mom is punishing me!" She rolled her eyes and continued pulling him out of the room.

Pabalya niyang binitawan ang paa ni Kage sabay upo sa likuran nito upang manatili itong nakadapa sa sahig. She grabbed his hands and pinned it in his back before pulling his hair in frustration. He arched his back in pain.

"Alam mo kanina ka pa e. Pikon na pikon na ako sayo! Does making a fool out of me fun for you?" She gripped his jaw and forced him to look back at her despite his hands pinned.

Honestly, he was unaware she misunderstood his 'kids.' He never intended to make fun of her. But since it has come to this, and this is the first time he saw her face flushed red in anger and embarrassment—he decided to play along. How daring and cute.

"To be pinned down by you," He paused and chuckled. "It wasn't so bad." Ngumisi ito sa kanya. "I don't mind dedicating an entire day to receive any punishment you have in store. . .sweetie," He whispered playfully. Sachal's grip on his hair tightened.

This flirtatious bastard!

𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐎 𝐀 𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐌𝐄
ᴮʸ ᴳᵒˡᵘᶜᵏʸᶜʰᵃʳᵐ