┌─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┐
chapter fifteen!
THE THINGS WE DON'T
WANT TO FACE
└─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┘

( motel california, pt. iii )

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

ISAAC AND BOYD wind up spending the night in Vera and Dominic's room in the motel. Both boys, though reluctant to admit it, had been shaken after being rescued from nearly committing suicide. They'd nearly sagged with relief when Vera had suggested it and had moved their belongings into the room minutes later.

It also turns out that both Boyd and Isaac are stubborn as mules, but Vera is even more stubborn, so an argument about who sleeps in the beds ends up going on for ten minutes before Dominic takes control and decides for them.

"Alright," he says, his voice calm and yet authoritative, slicing through the room like a knife. The three others stop talking at once. "We have two full-sized beds. It may be a tight fit, but we can probably fit two people on them if we try hard enough. Boyd and Isaac, you're too tall to fit on a mattress together, so we can have me and Isaac on one bed, then Vera and Boyd on the other."

"No," Boyd protests instantly.

Dominic sighs. "It's the only way it will work– the largest person with the smallest."

"I'm going to roll over and squash Vera like a bug."

"...Then don't roll over?"

In the midst of another brewing argument, Isaac grabs a pillow from Dominic's bed and tosses it on the floor. Vera watches as he kicks off his shoes and lies on the hideous orange carpet. He curls into himself, tucking his knees into his chest, and seemingly closes his eyes.

Boyd and Dominic haven't noticed. Their voices continue to swarm around the room until Vera puts a hand on either of their arms, immediately silencing them. She nods at Isaac's position on the floor. Both of them turn to look at the curly-haired boy.

"I guess that's that," Dominic says, raising his arms and letting them fall back to his sides with a soft plat.

"Isaac, you can take a bed," Vera tells him. "I'll sleep on the floor."

He doesn't respond. Instead, he merely continues to lie down facing away from them, nestling his head further into the pillow to get more comfortable. Vera twists her mouth to the side. She'd figured that he and Boyd should sleep on the beds after all they'd been through, but Isaac seems determined to stay there. If Vera had been a werewolf instead, she would have picked him up and thrown him onto the mattress. But since she'd probably break her arms if she'd tried, regardless of her training skills, she has to leave him.

Boyd wordlessly grabs a pillow from her bed and copies Isaac's actions, curling up near the foot of Vera's mattress. Even at her whine of, "Boyd," he still gives her a pointed look and then closes his eyes. And that's the end of the conversation.

Vera doesn't sleep. Even though she can see Dom passed out across from her from the sliver of moonlight escaping through the broken blinds, she doesn't have any motivation to sleep. Mostly because every time she closes her eyes, she can see Derek falling. His body on the escalator. Boyd drowning in that tub with the safe on his chest. She can feel her own paralyzing fear from earlier making her heart race and her body sweat until she has to kick off her blankets. If she wasn't so damn terrified of the motel, she would have gone outside for a walk.

They still don't know what happened to Scott, either. When Dom had momentarily left Isaac and Boyd's room to find the rest of their friends, he hadn't been able to find them. There had only been a gasoline spill near the bus. They hadn't answered calls, texts, or several poundings on their doors. Vera had even phased inside their rooms and found them empty. Boyd and Isaac had been too out of it to use their supernatural senses. And so it has become a waiting game– another thing to keep thoughts of slumber far from Vera's brain.

She climbs out of bed the next morning feeling like death. She's not sure if the wolves had slept at all, but their eyes are still closed as she tiptoes around them and heads to the bathroom. Not even rinsing her face with cold water in the sink can wake her up. As she brushes her teeth, a text in the cross country group chat makes her phone chime.

COACH: Meet canceled. Get to the bus in half an hour or we will leave without you.

DANNY: Really?

COACH: Yes, we really will leave you.

Vera sighs in relief. She doesn't know what she would have done if she'd had to participate in a cross country race after last night's events. Her shoulders feel a little lighter as she finishes brushing her teeth and changes into sweatpants and a black t-shirt instead of her team uniform.

Coach's whistle pierces the air outside of their room. His voice is slightly muffled through both the main door and the one for the bathroom, but she can still hear him yell, "Everybody up! I hope you all got my text. Somebody tell Greenberg– I don't think he has a phone. Or better yet, don't tell him. Maybe we can leave him here."

When Vera emerges from the bathroom, she sees the three boys bumbling around. Dominic's wavy hair is a tornado on his head that he's trying to tame with a comb. Boyd is in the middle of switching his old hoodie for another one. All Isaac does is stare blankly at the wall across from him. For a moment, Vera's heart seizes in her chest, remembering the haunting expression on his face from last night, but all of her adrenaline leaves her body once he reaches for his bag and begins rummaging around in it.

Boyd glances at her, having heard her irregular heartbeat. "You okay?"

"Fine," Vera replies, stepping over Isaac's legs. "Thought I forgot something."

He keeps an eye on her as she drops her bag onto her unmade bed. The weight of his stare becomes heavy with guilt. Vera realizes he's looking at the ugly, hand-shaped bruise on her right forearm from his freakout on yesterday's bus ride. Instead of leaving it exposed, she throws her maroon lacrosse jacket on and pretends she was always going to wear it. The back of it has her paternal surname and the one she mainly goes by – Pérez – as well as her jersey number, five.

As the students gather in the parking lot in preparation to board the bus, Vera tries in vain to locate her missing friends. She checks her phone for the umpteenth time, scowling when she finds no new messages from them. Her last outgoing one was to Allison.

VERA: hello??? are you guys okay???

She feels a presence beside her. Looking to her left, she realizes it's Isaac and involuntarily flinches away from him as her body remembers the last time he had been this close. His malicious gaze, the fangs sharpening to rip her throat out–

"Do you smell them?" she asks him and Boyd in an attempt to distract Isaac from her movement. He'd definitely noticed; his brow is wrinkled in confusion.

"The gasoline scent is too strong," Boyd replies. Isaac nods in agreement, momentarily tucking his nose into the collar of his t-shirt to get rid of the stench.

She sighs in discontent. It's not like her friends not to answer. It's especially unusual for Stiles. His anxiety in combination with his hyperactivity make him an incredibly fast texter. The last time he hadn't been able to answer his phone... it was because both Vera and Stiles had been locked in the Argent's basement by Gerard, beaten for information about Derek as Erica and Boyd had watched, tied up and helpless. What if something similar had happened? What if–?

"I don't wanna know," Coach's voice slices through her rampant thoughts, his voice drifting from the school bus. "I really don't wanna know, but in case you missed the announcement, the meet's canceled. We're going home."

"Heartbeats," Isaac reports, head tilted to the side in concentration. "One, two, three, four – they're in the school bus."

All of the stress in Vera's body leaves in a single exhale. Dominic deflates in relief too. Boyd uses his height and intimidatingly large frame to guide them to the front of the line. Vera can't bring herself to feel guilty for cutting once they board the bus and find Allison, Lydia, Scott, and Stiles slumped in a few seats toward the middle. All of them are in the same clothes as the night before– judging by their unkempt hair, exhausted expressions, and awkward positions, they'd clearly slept here.

"Are you guys okay?" Vera bursts out, nearly tripping over her feet to slip into the empty spot beside Scott. She notices the scent of gasoline is stronger around him but forces her nose not to wrinkle in disgust. "What happened last night? You didn't answer any of our texts."

"Yeah, well, we didn't want to go back inside that shit hole, and all of our phones died," Stiles responds in a voice half-gravelly with sleep. "Did you happen to grab our bags?"

Dominic sighs mid-step down the aisle of the bus, pivoting and pushing his way back through the crowd to check their rooms.

"Shire, what the hell are you doing?" Coach demands once he catches him leaving. "Did I not make it clear that we will leave without you?"

"Just gotta grab something I forgot," he answers. "I'll be back before you leave."

The stocky man rolls his eyes, then turns toward the kids who are trying to board – Ethan and Danny. "Pack it in. Pack it in!"

Ethan flinches at the loud tone before continuing on his way. Vera pointedly avoids his gaze as he walks toward them, pretending to pick at an invisible thread on the sleeve of her jacket, when the Alpha slips into the bench in front of her and Scott as casually as possible.

She glances up, her body tensing as she remembers his acidic tones from last night. She'd saved him from ripping his own insides apart, and all he'd done was throw it right back in her face. The bruise around his eye from Isaac's fist is still in the process of healing. The satisfaction the sight of it brings isn't kind, but Ethan had proved that kindness isn't something he cares about, anyway.

"I don't know what happened last night, but I'm pretty sure you saved my life," he says, every word laced with reluctance.

"Actually, I saved your life," Stiles cuts in. "Well, mostly Dom and I, but not that it matters that much. It's just – it's a minor detail."

Vera turns around and gives him her best, What the hell? look. She'd held him back so Dom and Stiles could grab the saw.

Ethan continues on as if the boy had never spoken. "So I'm gonna give you something: we're pretty sure Derek's still alive, but he killed one of ours. That means one of two things can happen. Either he joins our pack..."

"And kills his own," Scott cuts in, his hand subtly covering Vera's in support as she tenses.

"Or Kali goes after him, and we kill him. That's the way it works."

Vera's jaw locks, her fists eager to make that bruise around his eye a little more prominent, and the words burst out of her before she can stop them. "What was Derek supposed to do when Ennis came after him? Play Ring Around the Rosie?"

The expression Ethan gives her in return is utterly vacant of emotion. "Tell him he has a choice."

The nerve of him to speak to her that way when he knows that their little initiation ceremony will result in her death – the audacity of him to even look at her without a shred of pity, like she's just something in the way of more power for his pack–

When Ethan stands and starts to walk past them, moving further into the bus, Vera jumps to her feet and reaches out to grab the back of his shirt, not thinking, her vision red, and one fist raised. Scott's hand reaches out to grab her wrist. Lydia gets up, blocking Vera's way. Both of them know that she could easily phase through them and beat the ever-living shit out of Ethan, but it doesn't stop them from trying.

"Vera, no," Scott says, his grip on her left arm much gentler than Boyd's had been yesterday, but still firm enough to hold her in place. "You don't want to make things worse than they already are. We're even. Anything you do gives them an excuse to get back at you."

Some of the rage churning in Vera's stomach subsides. She begrudgingly takes a step back and plops into her seat, glaring daggers at Ethan as he takes a seat beside Danny in the back of the bus. As she faces forward, she notices Boyd and Isaac wearing similar cutthroat expressions. The two of them are squeezed onto one bench yet again. They both appear like they would pound Ethan's face in, too, if it hadn't been for Scott's influence.

At that moment, Dom comes rushing back onto the bus, Lydia's and Allison's purses slung over one shoulder, Scott and Stiles' duffle bags both clutched in his other hand. He hands everyone their belongings before collapsing in the empty spot beside Stiles. "So, what'd I miss?"

"Well, Ethan's still an asshole and we probably never should have saved his life," Stiles deadpans, fully aware of the fact that Ethan can hear him. "But also, he thinks Derek is still alive."

Dominic immediately looks at Vera, who is turned enough in her seat to see him. She knows that he's thinking of Cora's text from yesterday– about how when she'd gone back to look at the scene, both bodies had been gone.

Before he can ask about it, Lydia abruptly blocks Coach in his tracks as he starts to walk toward the back of the bus. "Hey, Coach, can I see that for a second?"

"What's that?" he asks as she proceeds to remove the whistle from around his neck. "I'm gonna need that back. Hey, Ethan!"

Lydia pays him no mind as she inspects the whistle and sits back down. She cups a hand around the back of it and blows, the usual, piercing shriek muffled. When she turns her palm around to show the others, a familiar, purple dust coats her skin.

"Wolfsbane," she says, eyebrows pinched.

Stiles' eyes go wide. "So every time that Coach blew the whistle on the bus, Scott, Isaac, Boyd–"

"And Ethan," Lydia finishes.

"We all inhaled it," Scott says.

Allison adds, "You were all poisoned by it."

Stiles regards the wolfsbane on Lydia's hand with a thoughtful expression. "So that's how the Darach got in their heads. That's how he did it."

With incredible speed and slightly spastic movements, he reaches across Dominic and snatches the whistle out of Lydia's grip. He fumbles with the window as he fights to open it. Coach only notices the moment he chucks the whistle outside where it lands in the parking lot.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey!" Coach shouts in protest as the bus starts to drive away. "Stilinski! You owe me a new whistle!"

At that moment, several phones buzz at once. Vera, Dominic, Boyd, and Isaac all check their phones to see a text from Cora in a group chat she'd created with them.

CORA: Meet at the loft when you get back.

Vera glances up to share an anxious expression with Dominic. Then she looks toward Boyd and Isaac, catching glimpses of hope in their eyes, but dulled with a plague of uncertainty and disbelief.

"Do you think he's actually–?" Boyd cuts himself off as if saying the word alive out loud will make it untrue.

"What?" Stiles asks, looking between the four of them. "What's happening?"

Dominic ignores him and types a reply.

DOM: is derek alive? the meet is canceled, so we're on our way back.

They wait. For several long moments, Cora doesn't respond. When she finally does, all of them read it immediately.

CORA: Meet at the loft.

"Nice to see Cora hasn't changed," Dom says as he hands his phone to Stiles so he can read the texts. "Still as vague and blunt as ever."

"But that has to mean he's alive, right?" Isaac asks.

Vera shrugs, trying to quell the hope swelling in her chest as well. She's known one too many times that hope is a dangerous thing, and if she allows it to consume her only to be faced with tragedy once she returns to Beacon Hills, she doesn't think she'll be able to bring herself back up again.

— ✯✯✯ —

Vera has no luck with napping during the ride back to the school. The possibility of Derek being alive is enough to make her hyperactive nerves work into overdrive, causing her to tap her fingers restlessly on her thighs and bounce her leg once her hands get tired. Scott doesn't comment on her constant movements. Instead, he stares out the window for several hours.

Vera doesn't ask what had happened to him last night. She isn't sure if he remembers, and also, it doesn't seem like her place to question how he almost committed suicide. Though, judging by the stench of gasoline that still clings to him like a second later, she guesses it has something to do with that.

They'd gotten so lucky. Every single one of the attempts had failed. Though the Darach had tried so hard to get each werewolf out of the picture, they're all still breathing. In Ethan's case... well, Vera isn't sure if she's happy about that, yet.

All of them scramble off the bus once it parks in the lot at the high school. Scott turns to them, motioning toward his bike. "I can only take one other person."

"I'll go with you," Isaac instantly offers, crossing their group's circle to stand next to him.

"I can fit four other people," Dom says. "Stiles and Boyd, you drove yourselves, so that leaves Vera, Allison, and Lydia with me."

"Sounds good." Stiles nods. "Meet you there."

Vera knows that Cora's original text had only been to the pack – and Dom since he's an unofficial member – but the driving situations are too complicated for Allison and Lydia not to come. Plus, she thinks that Scott is also an unofficial member of the pack, and therefore Stiles has to be there by default.

Derek may not like Lydia or Allison, but they're clearly worried about him, anyway. The car ride to the loft is silent except for the sound of the top hits playing on the radio. The sounds of Katy Perry, Bruno Mars, Adele, and P!nk go through one ear and out the other as Vera completely zones out of her surroundings. She's been shoving down her excitement for hours, but now that they're closer to the loft, she can feel her anticipation making her stomach tie into nearly-painful knots. Dom's arms are coiled tight with impatience as he drives.

They pull into the parking lot to see Scott and Isaac already waiting for them. A moment later, Stiles' powder blue Jeep comes veering into the lot and parks chaotically in a spot near the front. Once Boyd arrives, they wordlessly head into the lobby and toward the elevator.

Since Vera's hands are shaking too badly for her to press the button of Derek's floor, Allison does it for her. The tension inside the tiny lift is enough to keep the air out of her lungs. It doesn't help that Isaac is trying to keep himself calm in the small, enclosed contraption, repeatedly clenching and unclenching his fists to prevent a freakout.

The door opens. Vera's legs feel like lead. Dominic's supportive hand slips into her own, guiding her out into the hall. Though he seems steady on the outside, Vera can tell he's not only holding her hand for her sake, but also his. His green eyes are just as terrified– to the wolves, they all must reek of anxiety.

Walking toward the room seems like a journey down a never-ending hallway. It simultaneously feels like seconds and years have passed before she's finally standing in front of the door. Vera reaches out to grab the handle, but her hands are shaking so violently that Dominic does it for her. He takes a breath and then yanks the heavy door until it slides open, revealing the inside of the loft.

The sunlight flooding through the windows is so bright that it takes Vera's eyes a moment to adjust. Each figure seems like a silhouette, their features covered in shadows, but she can recognize them, anyway. Peter with his infamous tweed jacket standing off to the side. Cora turning to look at them. And then Derek. He's standing, intact and alive, in front of the table near the windows. He must have heard them coming, but he's still in the process of turning around when Vera starts running.

She doesn't remember thinking about moving. She just suddenly is, her hair flying back with the force of her speed and her sneakers pounding on the floor as she sprints across the room. Cora barely has time to warn her, "Wait, Vera, he's still healing," before she crashes into Derek and wraps him in a hug.

He lifts her from her feet to alleviate some of the force of the impact, and for a moment, it's like they're children again, unburdened with the responsibility of protecting their town and constantly fighting new battles. For a moment, it's like Derek's eyes are golden again instead of their icy blue when he shifts. She feels joy exuding from every pore in her body. Tears flood to her eyes from her body's attempt at a natural chemical balance, and soon they're staining the fabric of his black t-shirt while he hugs her back. 

Derek takes one arm away and it only takes Vera a moment to realize why. Dominic joins their embrace a moment later. Judging by the way Derek sways on his feet, he must have run as well, but he keeps them all steady like he always has.

"Cora, get in here, you asshole," Dominic says, his voice thick with emotion.

Cora does. Their family is back together again.

Once they pull away, Scott surges forward and hugs Derek as well. Then Boyd. Isaac is next, and the air is taut with the memory of shattering glass, both of them staring at one another. Derek waits for Isaac to make his decision. Ultimately, Isaac steps forward and wraps him in a brief hug that seems like the start of forgiveness. Stiles is left with an awkward handshake. Lydia and Allison get simple nods of acknowledgment.

"While this is all very touching," Peter says, startling Vera, who had forgotten his existence, "I would like to know who the hell that is."

He motions to someone standing by the door. Vera turns around to see Jennifer Blake, her English teacher, loitering awkwardly in the doorway. She's dressed casually in a pair of jeans and a pink blouse, her raven hair falling down in elegant curls.

"Man, it is so weird seeing teachers outside of school," Dom mutters.

"Miss Blake?" Scott questions in confusion. "What are you doing here?"

Miss Blake points toward the open door. "I can go. I see you're busy–"

"No, you can stay," Derek says. "Jennifer is the reason I'm alive. She helped me get here and made sure I didn't bleed out."

"Well, I wouldn't give myself that much credit. You've got some pretty fast healing."

Vera catches Cora's eye. Both of them share a twin look of suspicion, glancing between the woman and their brother. There's obviously something going on between them, if Miss Blake's laughter and Derek's smile couldn't have made that more obvious.

There's a beat of awkward silence that follows as all of the students stare at their teacher. Finally, the woman sighs and says, "You know, I'm just gonna go. We can talk when you have time. And for all of you, your homework is excused for tomorrow."

"Yes," Stiles hisses to himself with a small fist pump.

"But the book has to be finished by Friday!" Miss Blake calls as she leaves, her voice carrying through the cavernous loft. Stiles seems less enthused by that.

Isaac shifts from beside Vera. Again comes the involuntary movement that has her flinching away, her heart immediately tripping over itself with fright. While the others are engaged in conversation – mainly Scott, Stiles, and Derek, actually – Peter is still standing apart from the others, his head tilting in interest at Vera's skipping heartbeat. She shoots him a scowl from across the room.

"Can I talk to you?" Isaac asks her, the words bursting out like he'd been weighing on whether or not to say them, then his mouth had chosen for him.

Vera knows what the conversation is going to be about. She realizes what she might have to tell him. Allison catches her eye from across the room, giving her a knowing look and a discreet thumbs-up.

She doesn't want Derek out of her sight, but she's comforted by the fact that he's here and surrounded by people who care about him (and Peter). He's twenty-three; he can survive a few minutes without her.

Only Allison notices them slip into the hallway, but she doesn't say anything, allowing them to leave in private. Isaac keeps walking until he reaches the end of the hallway and stops, opening his mouth like he's going to ask something, but nothing comes out. She leans against the wall opposite him and tries to calm her racing heartbeat that has dread coiling in her gut.

"What's wrong?" he finally decides to ask. "You've been acting weird."

"Me? Weird?" she asks, making a pshaw! sound with her mouth as she waves a hand in dismissal. "I'm not acting weird."

Isaac stares at her with an unbelieving expression before taking a deep breath. When he speaks, his voice is level yet tinged with something that may almost be fear. "There's a period of time at the motel that I don't remember. It's like I blacked out." He hesitates, then grounds his next words out like they're shredding him from the inside, "What did I do?"

"Nothing," Vera insists, all jokes vanishing from her face and voice.

He repeats more gutturally, his question seeming to cause him physical pain, "What did I do?"

Vera pauses, then concedes with a sigh. She explains most of the incident – how Dom had been in the shower when Isaac had appeared, he'd cornered her and seemed intent on hurting her, and that she'd ultimately escaped. The part where he'd said "I need you out of my head," is notably left out; she doesn't think she can make herself repeat it. Instead, she adds in the fact that she couldn't phase through him because he would just chase her and put others in danger, and also how Dom didn't hear because he may have been trapped in one of his dissociation episodes.

Isaac is pale as death by the time she's done. He takes a step back so he hits the wall and rakes a hand through his curls, avoiding her gaze. "Oh, God. I'm so – I didn't –"

She notices the fear striking his face. How his hands are shaking and his cheeks become flushed with the now-familiar symptoms of trauma, his posture slack like he wants to make himself smaller. It clicks.

"Isaac," she says, taking a calm step forward. "It wasn't your fault. You're not like your father."

He's still plagued with terror and guilt, not seeming to believe her words. "I read somewhere that kids who are abused can sometimes pick up on–"

Vera says more adamantly than before, "Isaac, you are nothing like your father. I've already forgiven you. It's just going to take some time before my brain calms down, okay?"

Isaac hesitates, then nods, dropping his hand back to his side. He still can't look at her. His blue eyes move everywhere except where she stands, like the guilt is still too much to bear and seeing her will only make it worse.

"You were possessed. It wasn't you," she continues. "From the moment you stepped in the door, I knew it wasn't you. You would never do that."

"Yeah, Derek would kick my ass," he jokes, his voice a bit steadier than last time. Vera, understanding that humor seems to be his coping mechanism, lightly chuckles along with him.

"Probably." She nods. Their banter comes back as easily as putting on a coat. Though she'd been anxious about it, they'd needed this conversation. She doesn't think they would have been able to work together again if they hadn't had it. "Speaking of Derek, we should probably go back in there."

Isaac pushes himself off the wall and starts walking back toward the loft. When she moves alongside him, he says, "Really, though. I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Vera says. Though she'd already mentioned forgiving him, she thinks a part of him needs to say the words again so he can ease his guilt. She'd been telling the truth– it had been a traumatic day for all of them. She doesn't blame him at all.

Dare she say it, she may even trust him a little bit.

__________

a/n:

we stan a couple with communication!!!

also i constantly think about how tiny aimee is and decided to quickly make comparisons by putting her in pics with the teen wolf cast. (these are NOT SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD. I WASN'T EVEN TRYING. I KNOW THEY'RE BAD. i did this in like 2 minutes and quickly got rid of the background around aimee.) i'm adding them because i thought they were funny

AND HOMEGIRL IS IN HEELS. can you imagine her without them???

side note, i meant to add this in my previous author's note, but i cast vera's parents!
ramón rodríguez as daniel pérez castillo
celines toribio as ana garcía díaz
i also added them to the cast list in the intro! i wanted to add gifs but couldn't find any of celines :(

hopefully i'll be able to update soon!! my calc class has been kicking my butt (one letter grade drop and i fail... lol) so i've been focusing on that instead of writing. however, i completed my homework and had a bit of time to write this, so yay! luckily, it ends in a few weeks so i can write more after that :)

—kristyn

( word count: 5.1k )