After breaking up with Tom, Maria rode waves of guilt for most of the day. It grew easier once they split from Mitch and Shawn who were visiting the war museum and Tom who strayed with his camera. Prae joined Emma and Maria, but down-turned lips and nervous finger-tapping marred her typically upbeat composure. She stood beside Maria as they gazed out at the river flowing over the trestle rail bridge. Emma had wandered ahead to check on the street snacks situation.

"How are you?" Prae asked, her black hair billowing in the wind.

Maria sighed. Digging into that answer could take hours. She'd destroyed Tom to the point that he'd avoided everyone, including Prae, all morning and afternoon. When Adrian had betrayed her trust, it had taken months to recover, and she still wasn't there either with the number of times she thought of him during her relationship with Tom. How permanently scarred would Tom be?

"I've been a lot better."

Tears formed in the corner of Prae's eyes. "I am terribly sorry for the role I played in ending your and Tom's relationship."

Maria placed a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder. "It wasn't you. I made my choice based on my feelings."

Prae stared at the river. "I can't imagine I helped."

"You sped up the process. Better to rip off a Bandaid quickly." She should have done it last weekend instead of cowering from her heart's desire in Tom's arms.

Prae's wide-eyed gaze met Maria's. "Because of how I acted with Tom?"

"Not really, unless you count me comparing my feelings about you and Tom to the prospect of you and Mitch." Maria returned her hand to its spot in her other one as she leaned her forearms on the sun-warmed metal rail.

"Mitch and I? We're only friends, or we were until he told Tom how I felt." Prae's features hardened for a moment before they relaxed.

"Are you sure? I don't want to step in the middle of anything." She'd done it with Kelsey and Adrian, and now Prae and Tom.

A small smile erased a few worry lines on Prae's face. "Completely."

"Did you and Tom get to talk about you and him?"

Prae shook her head and sighed. "It wasn't the right time."

"How long have you had feelings for Tom?" When Prae tensed, Maria added, "I'm asking as a friend who cares about you, not because I'm upset."

Prae rapped her fingertips on the black metal bridge rail. "Not that long."

"Since the holidays?"

Prae nodded. "I hadn't considered a future with a foreigner until Tom came into my family home. He's so kind and supportive. He didn't mean to fill me with so much hope and love, but he does. Please know, I didn't want these feelings. I wanted you both to find happiness together."

"I'm glad someone can get him through this disaster I caused."

Water rushed beneath them, flowing over a few sharp-edged rocks.

"Tom has large reactions to everything. He often hides how bad it gets, but I imagine he couldn't conceal this one."

Maria sighed as a cool breeze ran over her skin. "Am I a terrible person? Real answer, don't spare my feelings."

"A terrible person wouldn't feel this much remorse."

"A good person would have kept their distance from Mitch." For all the times she'd demonized Kelsey, Maria had flirted with and cared for Mitch just as callously. It made her stomach churn.

"As I stayed away from Tom?"

"You're single though."

"He wasn't, and I still spent all that time with him, despite how you've been an incredible friend and how it could hurt you."

It only unearthed a larger problem. Maria didn't like Tom enough to care.

"You're friends, and Tom only has a handful of those, even fewer whose opinions he values enough to turn to consistently. I did the same with Mitch, who I never stopped liking and who Tom loathes."

"It was always his biggest insecurity."

"I thought by reassuring him it was nothing, it would become that to me, but..."

"You care too much about Mitch."

Maria exhaled into the cooling evening. "I do. I wish I didn't."

Prae took her hand and squeezed it. Maria wasn't sure if that reaction should comfort or worry her.

"Ice cream is here to cure your blues." Emma held up three halved coconut shells with little spoons and passed them to Maria and Prae.

Maria accepted the treat with a heavy heart. Tom had taken her for ice cream on their first date, and he'd been like a kid in a candy store every time they kissed. Why couldn't she have sensed then that their feelings didn't match and spared him the pain? "Thanks, Em."

"That sounded way too down for free ice cream."

"I just wish I hadn't hurt Tom so much."

Emma frowned. "You know what's worse than the situation with Tom? Him trashing your self-image like this. He can be upset, but not blame you for everything."

"I betrayed him."

"You dated for only a month. This isn't high school. He needs to get over himself."

"I validated all of his fears."

"You have feelings you cannot help. You didn't act, and you were honest about them. Tom's acting like he's the first person to be rejected. Newsflash, it happens to all of us." Emma sighed.

"I've been in his shoes." Maria's nose tickled as her eyes teared up. "Yet I acted like a monster."

"Maria, you were in a relationship with an abusive asshole. Tom's ex might have hurt him, but it was not like Adrian brainwashed you. Tom is being unfair in comparing you to his ex. She accepted a ring and monogamy. You shared half a dozen dates, and he surprised you with this trip."

Prae drew in a shaky breath and turned to Maria. "Tom made our friendship very... confusing. It was only a friendship, but his actions often made it feel romantic. While it was only kindness, in your position, I would be upset."

"See, the guy can only blame others." Emma took a baby scoop of ice cream.

"He's hurt and taken by surprise."

"He is, but none of that makes you a villain. You're still figuring out your life." A strong breeze sent ripples across the river. Emma looked between Prae and Maria. "We need a night out to purge these men from your systems."

"I know the perfect place." Prae grinned with a sparkle returning to her eyes.

Maria was skeptical at first, but when they arrived at a restaurant wafting with the scents of garlic, basil, cilantro and fried pork, she recalled why she and Prae had become fast friends months ago. There wasn't a tourist in sight other than her and Emma. Plates of saucy pork and rice, steaming noodle soups, and fried rice left the kitchen to grace the modest aluminum tables. Prae's order left Maria so engrossed in the meal, it blocked out the day's events. Prae smiled and laughed more too as they swapped stories about work and memories of being students themselves.

As Maria scooped the last of the fried rice onto their three plates, Prea's phone chimed. She slowly dug through her purse to pull out the device and her brow furrowed as she checked it.

"What's up?" Emma asked.

"It's Shawn."

Maria looked at Emma, who shrugged and checked her own phone, only to confirm with a head shake she hadn't received a message. Maria hadn't either.

"He is asking me to meet with Tom at a restaurant because he had to leave suddenly."

What would cause his sudden departure? Was Mitch with them too? Maria couldn't imagine Tom in the same room as Mitch without tearing him to shreds. Unless that was what just happened.

"Are they with Mitch?" Maria asked.

"Yeah," Emma answered. "Dinner was his idea, some kind of peace offering."

Prae looked at the other women. "Tom has said nothing. I'm unsure if I should go."

"We can keep you company if that helps," Emma offered.

Maria wrung her hands. "I doubt Tom would appreciate my presence." They hadn't had another conversation after the falls. Shawn's message could also be a way of setting up Tom and Prae.

"I won't appreciate his much right now either, so that'll balance it out," Emma muttered. "Plus, maybe Mitch got Tom's anger out of his system, and he can apologize."

Maria feared that. Mitch put up a tough front, but he internalized more than showed. If last weekend was any sign, it was only getting worse. Should she see what Tom had witnessed or try to find Mitch? Kanchanaburi was too foreign to her to succeed alone, but Shawn could help or he confirm if this was a set-up or a surprise date for Tom and Prae.

Maria: Hey, Prae just got your text. How's everything going?

When she received no answer, she joined Prae and Emma. The latter had decided the dessert menu was tempting enough to tolerate Tom. There were no signs of Shawn or Mitch during the walk toward the restaurant, and soon a waitress was leading them to a lit-up garden terrace by the water. The sky faded to a deeper hue of blue on the horizon. Had Tom's plan been to bring her here tonight? Perhaps she shouldn't have come.

Tom sat, staring at the river with his hands in his lap. Plates of partially finished food remained at the three table settings. No broken dishes, but the guys had left in a rush. A chill travelled up Maria's back. She checked her phone and there was still no message from Shawn. Something didn't feel right.

Prae broke the silence first with a gentle "hi".

"Prae," his voice held a lilt that made the woman smile. When he turned, his shoulders tensed as Maria's gaze crossed his. He looked away like she was the burning sun. "What are you doing here?"

Prae cleared her throat and added, "Shawn mentioned he and Mitch left and you may appreciate company."

"So we came to make sure their meals go to a good home." Emma plunked next to Tom and picked up a spoon, plunging it into an orange curry as if they hadn't just devoured delicious dishes.

Prae fidgeted with her hands. "I don't believe that was Shawn's intention."

"Happy coincidence then." Emma sipped the dark drink at his spot. She nodded at the empty spot across from her and beside Tom, and Prae took a seat.

Maria hovered by the chair that sat the furthest ajar from the table.

"I'm sure you'll enjoy what he ordered." Bitterness laced Tom's voice. The fried fish covered in a red, spicy-looking mango salad looked good, but she couldn't eat. She looked around at the happy patrons. Should she leave to avoid creating a scene?

"No dude. That shit stops now. You don't have a monopoly on pain, so suck it up and be civil."

"Sorry," Tom directed his apology at Prae. "I hope this hasn't ruined your night."

"We had just finished dinner. Perfect timing."

When his gaze rested on Emma and he raised an eyebrow, she shrugged and said, "This is too good to waste," after she swallowed more curry.

When the waiter came by and eyed them, Emma ordered everyone a round of drinks to take the edge off, she claimed. Maria sat and checked her phone again, but still no response. Should she ask Tom where they'd gone or just leave? He didn't want her here.

"Do you know where they went, Shawn and..." Maria hesitated.

"Mitch?" Tom's tone was rough like sandpaper, and his breath smelled like beer.

She swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded.

"No, he took off and Shawn followed. The man can make a dramatic exit."

"Did you piss him off?" Emma asked with a pointed glare.

It was Tom's turn to pause, and his Adam's apple bobbed up and down. "I didn't mean to. After everything that happened today, I was understandably upset."

What had Tom said?

Prae smiled. "Of course." If Maria wasn't there, she imagined Prae would have taken his hand.

"I was talking to him about that night," Tom's gaze met hers and her shoulders tensed, "and I didn't know that he'd... that his..."

"That what?" Prae coaxed.

"He mentioned his sister. I didn't know he had one, let alone that she died."

"What?" Prae and Emma exclaimed.

The words hit Maria like a winter gust to the face. Mitch had been a wreck on this topic, and somehow, he'd told Tom.

Her heart beat faster. Maria still had no message from Shawn or Mitch. If Mitch needed her, he would have reached out, right? Or had he only shared last weekend because she was there?

"He talked about her this week, but I did not know either," Prae said.

Tom's eyes were on Maria as if it were a test. That Mitch had opened up to both her and Prae and now Tom wasn't reassuring for their closeness, though he hadn't told Prae about her passing. Why would he tell Tom? If it was enough to send him running, he wasn't okay with it.

"I only found out last week. He'd mentioned her before that, but... how did he seem when he left?"

Tom shifted with stiff shoulders. "Not that well."

Screw Tom and his guilt infliction. She whipped out her phone and sent Mitch a few messages.

Maria: Are you okay?

She hesitated at the end of her next text. Was the heart emoji too much? Screw it. She'd already slept in his arms. What harm would one icon do? It was private, and she'd broken up with Tom, who thought hurting others because he was in pain was acceptable.

Maria: Heard what happened at supper. If you need anything, please call <3

"Did it happen recently?" Prae asked.

Maria shook her head. "If I were to guess, it would be just before he moved to Thailand."

"That's a hell of a reason to relocate," Emma said.

"It puts our struggles into perspective," Maria said. Despite her devastation over Mitch's rejection and losing her toxic relationship with Adrian, she had a lifetime to find love again. Tom's bitterness over losing a short-lived relationship where he didn't trust her enough to share things that bothered him was a pale comparison to losing a family member.

Emma reached out for Maria's hand. "Hey, don't discount your pain. Emotional abuse messes with your head too."

"I know, but losing family... It just makes me want to give Tina and Sunny an enormous hug."

The rest of the group nodded.

Tom cleared his throat. "If I'd known, I wouldn't have been so rude at dinner."

Maria remained quiet as she was in no position to tell him how to treat people.

"Why hasn't he ever mentioned anything?" he asked.

Everyone looked at each other until a heaviness weighed in Maria's chest. "Because it makes it real."

When she had recognized Adrian's actions as abuse, she had to accept the love she cherished was toxic and manipulative and that some of her habits and 'qualities' weren't her own, but learned behaviours which preyed on her fear of loss. Mitch carried guilt about his faded relationship with his sister, and Maria suspected it was only the tip of the iceberg. If Shawn had gone after him, he was worried too.

Still no text from either of them.

Emma squeezed Maria's hand under the table. "Dessert anyone?"

"I don't have an appetite," Tom said.

Maria concurred but didn't speak.

Emma grinned at Maria. "You know you want mango sticky rice."

"It is mango season," Prae added.

Mango sticky rice only reminded her of the meal she had Mitch had shared months ago, that he'd surprised her with when he was still trying to hook up with her. She wished she could share it with him.

As a heaviness settled in her chest, her phone finally rang, but the name on her screen wasn't the one she was expecting. Her heart pounded as she answered it with an urgent, "hey."