⌜tags」 : nct, jeno, sick, soft, love

↳this one is a
bit shorter but
i woke up almost
crying because
omg this made
me soft i love
lee jeno

07.04.18

✧

   "What?" I questioned the doctor, my voice breaking from shock. It felt like my insides were crumbling and falling apart at the sound of the news.

"There is no cure," the doctor repeated for me. His glasses sat low on his nose as he scanned the paperwork in his hands.

It was just me and him sitting in a never ending hospital hallway. No one else seemed to be around. The bright fluorescent lights overhead mixing with the scent of chemicals and the bad news made me feel incredibly nauseous.

"What does that mean for me?" I questioned with desperation, hoping that it was something I could live with.

"This disease is going to make you gain a lot of weight." The doctor set his papers to the side and leaned forward from his chair across from me. "No matter how hard you try, you won't be able to lose it. You might even look like a completely different person. You're joints will stiffen to the point where walking will be hard on you. Your immune system will weaken dramatically as the disease continues to take you over." He slowly exhaled, locking his eyes to floor. "I wish there was something we can do, but sadly there isn't."

I pressed my lips together and slowly nodded. "Thank you, doctor," I told him in a weak voice.

I wasn't ready to have such a drastic change on my life. I just wanted to shut everyone out so they would never have to be around me again. It made me feel like this disease was going to make me a burden to all my friends and family.

There was a small knock on my bedroom door as I laid on my bed in a dark room. "Can I come in?" a familiar voice asked.

I didn't answer.

Jeno cracked the door and looked in. "JamJam? Do you mind if I sit next to you?"

   My mouth stayed closed.

   Jeno walked over to my bed and sat on the corner. His hand slowly took mine as his thumb comfortingly rubbed the back of my hand.

   "Jeno," I started, my voice breaking. "I don't look so much like myself anymore, and it's not even over."

   Jeno continued to sit and hold my hand in the dark. A tear slipped down my cheek, not only from the change in my appearance, but also the pain in my joints.

   "Jeno, the new me looks awful," I whispered.

   "Don't day that," Jeno told me in a gentle voice. "It's not true."

   A week rolled by since that night. Walking was getting harder on me and my weight continued to increase. Whenever I looked in a mirror, I didn't even recognize myself. Not just from the weight gain, but I was starting to look like a completely different person.

   Jeno brought a couple of movies over to my house for us to watch. He helped me to the couch as I felt pain run through my body. Jeno took my hand as he sat on couch, making sure I was alright. I nodded in response, but clenched my jaw.

   "I'm becoming such a burden," I told him.

   Jeno shook his head. "You're never a burden to me."

   "Even though I've completely changed? Even though I can barely walk? There's no way you can be fine with this."

   Jeno smiled at me. "I still love you," he whispered, holding my hand even tighter. "Nothing will change that."

(so um where can I get one?)