Four Years Ago

The moon illuminated the backyard with its silver light.

The night air was crisp against my bare skin as I practiced with my bō staff. Performing the same striking motion, imagining I was hitting an invisible opponent. My hands turned white as they clenched the wooden shaft, and my eyes blinked back the red rage that threatened to blur my vision.

An entire year went by since I first met Sebastian, and my life had become a relentless routine of agony. Subjected to the same experiments as Sebastian tried to unpick the mystery behind my power.

There were rare days I had to myself. Though few in number, I didn't waste them. They were supposed to be for rest so that I could heal and regain my stamina. But on those days I practiced with my staff. I needed to become stronger and faster. Otherwise, my promise to kill Sebastian meant nothing.

I swung again, another strike, and the air swooshed around me, and my hair fluttered over my eyes.

With each visit in the infirmary, Sebastian tested my limits. And each visit was more painful and strenuous than the last. With my wolf having taken away my healing ability, it meant my body was now covered in purple bruises and white scars that wouldn't heal. Some scars were small and smooth, but others were large and ragged. Each fresh scar was more gruesome than the last.

My jaw clenched as I channeled my anger through my staff, but each strike wasn't enough to contain my rage. I spun around and landed a downward strike on a nearby tree, snapping its lower branch. It thudded to the ground.

"Find the Rogue Wolf."

My inner wolf's last words still echoed in my mind.

I contemplated trying to escape and find the Rogue Wolf, but a guard trailed me wherever I went. Even now, I was being monitored by the eagle-eyed Ms. Lang. I could sense her watching me from the third-floor window of the mansion. It made escaping impossible without revealing the location of the oak tree. And I couldn't allow my last piece of hope to be taken away from me.

I had to wait. I needed to be ready. Waiting for the perfect opportunity. But that time couldn't come fast enough. I was waiting for the full moon, the only time I could guarantee Sebastian and the pack would leave the mansion. But I still lacked a plan to escape.

Even if I escaped, where would I go? I didn't even know where to find the Rogue Wolf.

I spun and struck another branch and it, too, snapped.

Even though I hated Sebastian, I couldn't help but thank him for teaching me how to fight. I know he only taught me for selfish reasons, and he never taught me to his level of skill, but I was still thankful.

I felt stronger and more powerful and the routine I practiced everyday had become like a form of tai chi. My movements were slow, fluid and precise as I moved the bō staff around me, swinging and parring and defending.

"You know, you look hot when you're focused, half naked and covered in sweat."

I flinched, sensing Sebastian's presence from behind me. I was too focused on my routine to notice him sneaking up on me.

Staff in hand, I swung around and posed myself into a defensive stance, ready to strike. "What do you want?"

"Calm down." He raised his hands in surrender as he chuckled. "I'm heading out for supplies. Is there anything you want? You've been obedient and I would like to reward you."

"I'm not a dog you can offer treats to when I obey." My mouth clenched.

"Don't be like that. I'm trying to be civil with you." He took a step forward.

"You call torturing me everyday civil!" I back spun the staff, swapping it between my right and more dominant left hand, and pointed it at Sebastian's throat—a warning not to come any closer.

Sebastian didn't flinch. His gaze never left my eyes.

"You're getting good at the staff." His hand smacked the wooden weapon from his throat. "You've built muscle and now your clothes are too small for you. I can buy you new ones."

"I want nothing from you." I huffed, leaning the staff against the tree. Using a towel I had taken from my gym bag, I wiped the sweat off my body before putting on my sweater.

I could sense him inching closer.

Sebastian stepped behind me, his body a shell around mine as his breath brushed past my neck. His hand slinked around my shoulder and down under the seam of my sweater. His touch was icy against my hot and sweaty body, and my chest flinched.

"I've missed you coming to my room, your touch, your smell and the way you moan my name." He inhaled my scent as he pressed his lips to my neck.

His hand reached up to my chin. He tilted my head to gaze into his obsidian eyes and I stared long and hard. Previously, I would have thought the gleam in his eyes was love, but now I see the cruelty and manipulation behind the facade.

"Don't look at me with those seething eyes." His thumb stroked my chin, his lips coming closer to mine. "You used to love me once. Everything I've done for you has been for love."

I scoffed.

"Love doesn't involve hurting your partner!" I sneered. "Unless you have something better to offer, fuck with someone else!"

I shrugged him away and marched off not before snatching my staff from the tree.

"I can offer you your freedom."

I halted. My body stiffening as my heart slammed against my chest. He couldn't be serious. I know Sebastian needs my power for something more than healing his pack of wolves. He wouldn't so easily let me go without a catch.

"Don't play games with me!" I spun back around, tears blurring my vision as my shaking hand clenched around the staff. "I'm too valuable for you to let me go free."

"You're right. You are valuable to me. But I meant what I said earlier: you've grown stronger." Sebastian prowled a circle around me. His eyes scanned my body as I went into a guarded stance, ready to defend myself. "Fight me in ritual combat, and if you win, I'll grant you your freedom."

Ritual combat? An ancient method used to clear up disputes between two rival wolves who both wanted the title of alpha. It was a sacred match and by law, the losing alpha would renounce his title to the winning wolf.

However, if the wolf who initiated the match lost, they would face banishment from their pack. Though still in law, it was no longer in practice. In my lifetime, I'd only witnessed it once as a child when my father defeated his brother to become Alpha.

"I'm not playing games." Sebastian's voice softened. "Ritual combat is law. If you win, I will grant you your freedom."

I was still suspicious of Sebastian. There was always a catch with him.

"And if I lose?"

Sebastian's lips turned into a sinister smile. "Then you're mine forever."

***

I agreed to the fight.

It's not like I would have another chance to gain back my freedom, so I might as well try. Like Sebastian said, I was stronger. I had a slim chance of beating him.

So until then, I would train until I'm even stronger.

Sebastian had chosen a date and planned to have the ritual combat the night before the full moon. As I sat on the sill of my bedroom window, I gazed outside and smiled up at the moon as a fond memory came back to me.

It reminded me of the Moon Festival. My favorite night of the month was the night before the full moon when they held the fighting tournament. It made me wonder if our town's tradition had originally come from the ritual combat. Both events had the same outcome, to reveal the strongest wolf.

I sighed as I let go of my legs, uncurled my knees from my chest and reached out to my sketchpad next to me. I glided the graphite pencil across the pad, drawing the outline of a wolf.

The nostalgia from the Moon Festival had awoken my creative side that I thought had long gone, and for what felt like a very long time, I smiled. I sketched some more, shaded, adding detail to the different colored tones of the fur until my rough sketch had become a drawing of the Rogue wolf. Putting extra detail into his floppy left ear.

I wonder how he gained such an injury?

It was a clear night and as I stared at the moon; I wondered where the Rogue Wolf might be. Was he searching for me? Or did he think I'd abandoned him that night?

I thought back to the sketch I'd seen in the cabin. The one that had overwhelmed me with such strong emotions I'd ran away out of fear. I still didn't understand my reaction to that sketch. I tried to recreate it, but it never came out the same. I couldn't capture the same emotions that the original artist had put into his drawing.

A knock came at the door and Sebastian came inside. I quickly scrambled to hide my sketches and shoved them behind the cushion on the windowsill. My actions didn't go unnoticed by Sebastian, but still I played innocent.

"Why are still up?"

"I was admiring the moon and that I will finally be free from you."

Sebastian scoffed as he marched towards me. "What are you really doing?"

He reached behind me.

"Nothing." My voice went up as I pushed him away.

He growled back, hitting me away, and despite my protests, he pulled out the sketches from behind the cushion. His face tensed, his frown deepening into a large V. His hands, shaking, crumpled the paper until his knuckles turned white.

"How do you know this wolf?" he demanded.

Sebastian knew him? I frowned. But how? They didn't meet that night. My throat tightened, but I kept my emotions in check, not wanting to give away that I was scared as Sebastian pressed me further.

"How do you know him?" He demanded with the use of his alpha's voice.

"He's the Rogue Wolf." I shook.

"I should have known it was him!"

Sebastian ripped the sketch in half, and I cried in protest as a sharp pain tore through my chest and left me breathless.

"Who is he?" I seethed at him through angry tears as I clutched my shirt, panting. The pain was like a white-hot knife was passing through my heart.

"When you lose and you will, I will hunt him down and kill him, and I will make you watch! Then nothing will stop you from being mine."

***

The swollen moon hung low in the sky and cast its sickly light over the forest clearing. The pack gathered in a tight circle, howling with hunger.

I could feel the intense gaze of their eyes watching me, and caught John's gaze. His face showed his usual look of indifference. Though for a second I could have sworn I saw a hint of worry in his eyes.

As the circle tightened, the air felt close, thick with anticipation, and every inhale of breath struck at the back of my throat.

Standing across from me was Sebastian, tall and broad, his bare chest rising and falling. His muscles rippled as he punched his fists together and his dark eyes never left mine. I could feel his body heat from where I stood, a wild energy barely contained beneath his skin.

I was a victory away from gaining my freedom. It dangled in front of me, like bait to fish. But if I lost—if I lost, I was Sebastian's, chained to him forever.

"There's still time to back out. There's no need to get hurt." Sebastian rolled his shoulders as he warmed up and cracked his neck. "I won't think any less of you."

I clenched my fists, digging my claws into my palms. "Not a chance in hell."

The circle tightened even more. But the cheering felt like a distant echo as the world seemed to narrow to just me and Sebastian. There was no backing out now.

Sebastian was bigger and stronger—but I had speed.

I squared my shoulders as I prepared myself. Still, my nerves rattled through my body. My heart hammered against my ribs, my breathing became ragged, and my blood rushed to my ears. I forced myself to focus, to steady my breathing. I had to stay sharp. One slip up and it would all be over.

The first move came like lightning.

Sebastian was a monstrous black blur as he lunged at me. He moved faster than I could see, and with seconds to spare, I dodged left, and felt the rush of air slice past my face as he swiped his claws.

Too close. Too damn close.

I twisted back around and aimed a fist at his ribs, throwing all of my weight into the punch. It connected with a thud. I winced as pain shot through my arm and reverberated through my bones. Sebastian, meanwhile, grunted, but he barely flinched.

His lips curled into a vicious grin, his canines gleaming under the moonlight. "Is that all you got?"

I growled in frustration and launched forward when he took another swing at me. I used my speed to dart in and out of his reach while connecting my punches. He hissed in annoyance, but every time I landed a hit, he took it without budging.

My fists were raw and my knuckles had split and were bleeding. Each hit was like trying to break through a brick wall.

Sebastian struck again, his movements more fluid this time. But like a whirlwind, I ducked, his claws swiping past my face as I rolled under his arm and kicked out at his knee.

He staggered, and just for a second, as I let out a sigh of relief, I smiled. I can win this, I thought.

He turned faster than I could react.

His hand enclosed around my throat like a steel vise. He cut off my air supply as he lifted me clean off the ground. My vision blurred and my legs kicked out as panic surged through me. But no matter how much I clawed at his hands, I couldn't break free.

"You're quick on your feet," His face loomed closer, his breath was hot against my face, "but not fast enough."

With a roar, he slammed me into the ground. A wave of pain exploded through my back, my bones screaming in protest. I cried out, gasping for air, but each breath felt like I was inhaling broken glass. Before I could recover, Sebastian had me pinned down, his knees pressing into my chest.

I snarled. My muscles strained, burning as I pushed back against him with everything I had, but it wasn't enough. His weight was crushing, like he wanted to flatten me into the earth.

"Stay down!" he growled, eyes burned into mine as he reached up to restrain my wrists. "Stay down and accept you're mine."

"No!" I spat, my voice raw, defiant. "I'll never be yours!"

"You agreed to the outcome of this fight." Sebastian laughed, a deep, rumbling sound that shook fear through my body. "You're mine forever."

His claws pierced into my wrists, pinning me harder to the ground and drawing blood.

"I've won the Ritual Combat. It's impossible for you to break the agreement we made. Not even by your fated mate."

I didn't know what he meant by that, but I didn't have time to think when his fist came down, smashing into my face. The world exploded into white-hot pain. My vision shattered, and the stars danced in the darkness. I tried to move, to fight back, but my body wouldn't listen. Everything was slipping away.

The surrounding sounds grew muffled, like I was sinking underwater. I could hear the pack cheering, but it felt so far away. I couldn't feel anything but the cold ground seeping into my bones.

Sebastian leaned closer. His hand curled around my throat and his lips brushed past my ear as he whispered, "You're mine, Nathaniel."

I could sense his grin, wide and victorious.

And just like that, I knew I'd lost. Not just the fight, but my life.

I wasn't free. I was never free to begin with, and I never would be.

The last thing I heard before darkness swallowed me whole was the sound of the pack howling.