You shot upright when you came back aware. Blankets fell off of you and comforting arms wrapped around you. "Shh, it's alright. You're ok. You're safe. Apparently Stark's nickname for you is one of those stupid trigger words," Loki's voice was soothing. You wrapped your arms around him and tried not to whimper at what Hydra had done to your brain. You realized that you were in Loki's bed, had been laying with your head pillowed on his chest. "I've got you, you're safe, sweetheart," Loki soothed and stroked your hair.

"They broke my brain," you wailed at him, crying blood-red tears onto his shirt. Now that you were physically safe, your emotions and the pent up feelings of what had happened to you was finally escaping.

"No, sweetheart, they didn't break you. They hurt you, yes, but you're strong and brave, and wonderful, and you survived what those monsters did. We'll fix those stupid words they put in your head. You could do it for Bucky alone in those conditions. The two of us together can easily do it for you." Telepathic powers were among Loki's strong suit.

"I didn't, couldn't, break his trigger words. I stitched his broken mind back together, but I couldn't undo all of the damage," you reminded Loki.

"We'll do it together, dearheart," he told you gently and kissed the top of your head. "Working on such a tricky piece of magic is hard enough. Doing it while being tortured is more impressive and impossible and you managed splendidly, darling," he reminded you, warmly, proudly. "Even though all the pain and torture you fought through. You didn't give up and you fought them every step of the way however you could,"

You sat up to look at him, tears and heartbreak in your eyes. "Loki. The village... They were all innocent and I... and I..." tears spilled from your eyes, leaving red tracks down your cheeks. "They did it, Loki, they made me into a real monster!"

In the next instant, Loki moved you, his hands around your upper arms as he lifted you and settled you on his lap, facing him, straddling his legs. Stupidly strong god. More tears spilled from your eyes, the prelude to gross ugly sobbing. Loki's hands were vices on your arms. He shook you once, not hard, just enough that you had to look up into his eyes, just enough to startle you and get your attention. "Listen to me," he told you firmly, his voice stern, not icy, not angry, but firm that you would listen to what he had to say. Another shake. "Are you listening?" he demanded. You nodded, but didn't look him in the eyes, keeping your gaze on his chest. His fingers moved to under your chin, his thumb against your cheek, cupping your chin in his hand as he gently tilted your head up, forcing you to meet his gaze.

"You are not a monster. Do you hear me? And I refuse to allow you to wallow in guilt for what those petulant sacks of rotting flesh did to you. They beat you, burned you, shocked you, starved you, wouldn't let you rest or sleep; they tortured you. Believe me, I felt every single injury they inflicted upon you, my love," he added before you could protest. He gestured with his free hand to the burn mark on his neck. It was in the shape and same placement as the obedience disk that had been in your own neck. You were sure you had an identical mark.

"Then they went and put magic words in your brain to make your body do things without your mind even knowing, without even giving you to option to disobey," that must've been how Nat had explained trigger words to him. It wasn't an awful explanation, though overly simplistic. "You are in no way responsible for them violating your body and mind, or anything they forced you to do. Do you understand me?" he demanded, a hint of a snarl in his tone at the demand.

You managed to nod with a small whimper of bruised emotions, of the pain of things you had done, of heartbreak, and grief of what you'd been through and what you'd been forced to do. Loki wrapped his arms around you, pulling you to him. You wrapped your arms tightly around him, up under his arms to his back, burying your head in his shoulder as you wept. "You are the sweetest, kindest, gentlest, most caring being whom I have met in all of the nine realms and I love you more than anything in the universe," he told you warmly, running his fingers through your hair, his words and presence reassuring. "You're a sweetheart; I've loved you since the day I met you. It was amazing to me that a lady who was in such a situation, and when I found out what you'd been through already it was even more impressive, could still wear her heart before her for everyone to see. I was so afraid that it would be bruised or torn and more than anything in my life, I wanted to keep it safe. I'm sorry I failed you, my love, more than anything, but I swear to you that I will love you to the end of our days,"

"You promise?" you asked him softly, nervously. He was known for his silvertongue and lies.

He kissed your hair. "I may the the god of lies, sweetheart, but I swear on all that I am that I tell you the truth now. You're not a monster. You are not responsible for what they did to you or what they made you do, and I will always love you," he told you firmly. Your tears slowed under his reassurances and you pushed off his chest to sit up, as you reached up to rub the back of your hand across your eyes. Loki smirked and handed you a handkerchief.

"Always a gentleman," you commented softly, with the barest hint of a smile. He gave you a warm smile and touched your cheek.

"There's my sweetheart," his voice was warm and loving. You gave him a real smile and vanished the handkerchief. A moment later, you were hiding a yawn behind your hand. You flushed at his frown. "When was the last time you fed?" he asked firmly, cornering you into answering him.

You had to think about it. "A few days ago? Like a teaspoon of chicken's blood," your face crinkled in disgust, telling him quite clearly what you thought of that meal. "Which does next to nothing for vampires, by the way, chicken blood is useless and tastes disgusting," you whined, as if that were the point of his question.

"That's what I thought," he said dryly. His hands were lightly on your waist, but you felt the threat that he would keep you in place if you tried to run. You knew what was coming. "They starved you, darling, kept you weak, and still forced you to work nonstop," you raised an eyebrow. "Bucky told us while you were unconscious," he explained. You nodded, damn bigmouthed metal-armed overprotective army-man. "Let me help you," he bid you softly and you hear the helplessness in his voice. He hated that you'd been gone so long, that he hadn't been able to find you quickly, that he had allowed you to be taken from him in the first place. He hated that he hadn't been able to help you enough.

You hesitated. "I should say no. There's a whole fridge of blood," you hedged. "And you need yours for yourself," you reminded him.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Sweetheart, kindly remember that I am a god and a little blood-loss is not going to do me any harm whatsoever. It does me no harm and will help you tremendously. Please let me help you," he bid you again, his voice nearly begging. You hesitated for another moment, knowing again that you shouldn't, but the offer was too tempting. It was easy to get back to full strength quickly with the power that flowed through his veins and would be a lot faster and a lot less blood consumption and time than trying to do the same with animal blood.

"You must love me," you murmured and looked over at the door to make sure it was locked this time. You really didn't want to get interrupted again. You turned back to Loki and reached for the hem of his t-shirt.

"More than anything, love," he replied and helped you remove his shirt, balling it up when it was off and tossing it into the hamper. Typical male. You moved and kissed him, starting softly, chastely, even as his hands pulled you to him, wound in your hair, held you to him like he hadn't seen you in months. The kiss deepened and your tongue played with his, your own fingers running and winding through his hair. You kissed your way to his ear, nibbled on it gently, he made a soft noise of pleasure and you kissed your way down his neck, sucking on the pulse as you tugged gently on his hair. He gasped and moaned as he tilted his head back, giving you full access to his vulnerable neck. You hesitated a moment longer before you carefully sank your fangs into his neck. His blood was just as you remembered it, not as hot as human blood, but full of so much more power. Still, you paid careful attention to his heartbeat, to the signs of when to stop, but they didn't come. He was right, this wouldn't harm him at all. Not when you were sated, stronger than ever, and he had shown absolutely none of the signs a human would have. He could have donated a lot more blood and not noticed. You carefully licked the wound closed, taking the time to heal it completely. No one would ever know.

You moved to sit next to him and pulled his head onto your shoulder, holding him and stroking his hair while he rode out the last of the haze of endorphins and euphoria of the vampire's bite. It was only a minute before he shook his head to clear it. You kissed his forehead. "Are you ok?" you asked as he moved to sit up on his own again.

"I'm fine, don't fret," he told you warmly. You gave him a bright smile when you realized he really was. He was perfectly fine. "There's my sweetheart," he told you brightly and kissed you. "If you're up to it, darling, the rest of the team would like to see you. Stark is especially worried after he accidentally knocked you out. There's no rush..." he added quickly, offering sanctuary and safety here if you weren't up to going, weren't ready to face the others yet.

You nodded and moved to get off the bed. "No, I'll go see them, but I'd like a shower, and something to wear besides this godawful red dress," you added when you realized you were still in the godforsaken red dress.

"Sorry about that," Loki said. "No one thought you'd be comfortable if your clothes had been changed while you were unconscious," he explained. You nodded. That made a lot of sense, though Nat could have. Hell, Bucky had seen you naked already, and Loki was your boyfriend... Still you appreciated the concern.

"D-do you mind if I steal a-?" you started, heading for his closet before waiting for an answer, or to finish asking your question. You knew he'd let you borrow anything from his closet you wanted.

"Steal what you'd like, sweetheart," he told you warmly, getting up and coming up behind you, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your neck while you opened his closet to look for the item you wanted to steal. You found one of his hoodies and shut the closet door again.

"Will you come with me?" you asked him softly, nervously, more afraid of being alone than you wanted to admit, but you hated asking all the same. Even though it was a natural response with what you'd been through. You hated seeming weak.

Loki kissed the top of your head. "Of course," he told you warmly and kept his arm around your shoulders to walk you across the hall to your own room. It was stupid to be afraid here in your home, but Loki didn't seem to mind at all as he checked your rooms for intruders. He waited on your bed with a book while you ducked into the bathroom for a hot shower so you could finally get the scent of that place off of your skin. You used a touch of magic to dry your hair once you were clean and dressed, comfortable again in jeans, a t-shirt, and Loki's stolen hoodie, and went back to Loki, who was waiting patiently in your bedroom. "You look lovely as ever, my darling," he reassured you, seeing your shyness. He stood and wrapped you in a hug.

"I love you," you told him softly.

"I love you as well, sweetheart," he reassured you. He kissed the top of your head. "Now come along, little one, you need human food too," he reminded you warmly and kept his arm around your shoulders to walk you downstairs.