I'm warning you right now.

This episode has a pretty big twist.

Don't sue me for it.

Ok bai.

Dipper's POV

Mabel and I were at the gift shop, getting a candy bag from the vending machine.

Dipper: *presses a few buttons, the candy bag coming closer*

Dipper and Mabel: Candy!!! Candy!!! Candy!!!

Candy Bag: *gets stuck*

Dipper: No, it's trapped!!!

Mabel: Everything is terrible forever!!!

You: *walk over* Ok, what's going on right now?

Mabel: Candy's stuck inside machine!!!

You: Oh, that's an easy fix. Watch this! *hit the machine a few times before elbowing it, opening it*

Dipper and Mabel: Whoa!!!

Dipper: How'd you do that?!?

You: I've known that trick for years, someone showed it to me. Don't remember who, though, I was quite young.

Mabel: *holding multiple candies* Forget taking off the wrappers, I need to eat these now!!! *eats a few candies with the wrapper*

You: Maybe I should've taken off the wrappers for her.

Dipper: (y/n), you're amazing!!!

You: *blush* !!!

Dipper: *blushes more* Uh- I-I mean-!!!

You: *laugh softly* Thanks, Pine Hat.

Mabel: *chokes on the candy* That was a mistake!!! *falls*

You: *close the vending machine* Anyways, Stan's making me restock, I'll see you guys around! *leave*

Dipper: *notices your bag still on the counter* Whoa, better make sure she gets this back.

Mabel: Wait!!! I've never seen (y/n)'s bag before! What do you think she keeps in there?!?

Dipper: I dunno, girl stuff?

Mabel: But don't you wanna learn some (y/n) secrets?!? *opens the bag*

Dipper: I don't think we should- *takes out a picture* Aw, little (y/n) playing laser tag!

Mabel: *takes out her phone* She left her phone in here too!

Dipper: *takes out a small card* (y/n) (m/n) (l/n), birthdate: July 13th- Wait a minute... That's today...!

Mabel: Whoa...!!!

Dipper: That's weird, I wonder why she wouldn't tell anyone.

Mabel: Uh, duh!!! It's probably because she wants someone to throw him a surprise party!!! I can relate! I've been waiting for a surprise party my whole life!

Candy: *runs in, throwing confetti* Surprise!!!

Mabel: ... *looks at her with narrow eyes* Too little too late, Chiu...

Candy: Aww... *leaves*

Mabel and I decided to plan (y/n) a surprise party! It's the least we could do for all that she's done for us. Since Mabel and I have had every birthday together, we were experts at planning birthday parties!

Once we heard footsteps coming this way, we hid in places, waiting for her to come over.

Candy: *leading you over*

You: *blindfolded* Uh, I don't know what's going on, but I'm getting a little nervous.

Candy: *takes off your blindfolds*

You: *your eyes widen a bit* H-huh?!?

Dipper, Mabel, and Grenda: Surprise!!!

Mabel: Happy birthday, (y/n)!!! We got everything you love!!! (f/toping) pizza, (f/flavor) cake-!!!

You: Mabel-

Mabel: We even got you the brand new Fight Fighters arcade machine!!! The latest version!!!

You: Mabel-!

Mabel: Quick, a picture for the album!!!

You: MABEL!!!

Everyone: !!!

You: ... Look, I-... I really appreciate this, all of this, but... *sigh* I need to go... *walk away*

Wendy and Stan: *walk over*

Wendy: Whoa, did you guys see (y/n)? What happened to-? *sees all the party decorations* Oh no, oh no no...!!! Ok, you guys didn't know so it's totally not your fault, but (y/n) hates her birthday.

Dipper and Mabel: What?!?

Wendy: It's a total mystery! I guess he's like this since she was younger, some weird personal biss or something.

Mabel: There's gotta be something we can do!

Wendy: We've tried everything!

Stan: I even petitioned the government to have this day removed from calendars. Now I'm not allowed on airplanes.

Mabel: Dipper, maybe you can talk to her!

Dipper: What?!? Why me?!?

Mabel: She talks and listens to you, she might tell you what's wrong!

Dipper: *thinks for a bit* Or maybe... we just need to bring out the big guns.

We managed to convince (y/n) to follow us somewhere. Eventually blindfolding her. She was not happy about that part though. Once we got to our destination...

You: Guys, if this is some sort of twisted prank, I will never forgive you.

Dipper: Might want to rethink that. *takes off your blindfolds*

You: *your eyes widen a bit* W-Wait, laser tag...? I... I haven't been to this place in years...! How'd you guys know I liked it...?!?

Mabel: Um, we definitely didn't rifle through your bag! *laughs awkwardly*

Announcer: *tv* Welcome to the year 8000!!! Society collapsed, fog machines everywhere,-!!!

Wendy: *touching the wall* Are these walls just mattresses spray painted purple?

Stan: I think this place used to be a mattress store.

You: *after you, Dipper, Mabel and Soos put on your laser tag armor* I-I dunno, guys, I'm not sure I'm up to this today...

Dipper: Don't worry, (y/n), as soon as you start playing with us you're gonna have a great time!!!

Mabel: We promise no matter what happens we won't leave your side!!!

You: ... *sigh* What the heck, I guess I can give it a try...

We were waiting in line. As the gates opened, we ran inside to start the battle!!! However, we stop running when we almost crash into a white wall. Huh?!? We were inside a completely white room. Mabel just thought it was a part of the laser tag thing, but I was super confused.

Mabel: Whoa, this is even cooler than I imagined!!!

Two men appear in front of us, both wore some futuristic armor. Mabel kicked one of the guys in the crotch area, but the armor that covered that area- spoke...? Ok, this is getting a little too weird.

Mabel: Wait, what...?!?

Dipper: *turns around and gasps at he sight of the gates closing with you tying his shoe on the other side*  Oh no, (y/n)!!!

Gates: *close*

Mabel: *kicks the wall*

Man 1: Nice try, but that's solid time-tanium, kid! There's only one way out of here!

???: Through me!!!!! *realizes his suit is transparent, then uses his watch to change it to his normal gray suit* Through me!!!! And that's what it would've been like if I just gotten it right the very first chance but it still as affective!!!

Dipper and Mabel: *gasp*

Mabel: The time traveler guy!!!!! What did you say your name was again...? Blendo...? Blondin...?

Dipper: *snaps his fingers* Blar-Blar!!!

Mabel: There it is!!!

Blendin: It's Blendin!!! Blendin Blenjamin Blandin!!! How could you not know my name after you ruined my life?!?

Dipper and Mabel: ... *share a confused glance*

Blendin: Initiate flashback!!! It was after you stole my time device to win your stupid pig!!! I was cast out of the time anomaly removal crew, my whole life's purpose!!! Then I was given ten squared life sentences in time prison!!! I spend everyday since then planning my vengeance!!! And now finally, it has come!!!

Dipper: Look, we're sorry about all that but we're in the middle of something really important right now!!!

Mabel: It's our friend's birthday today and we promised we wouldn't leave her side!!!

Blendin: What?!? You think some dumb birthday matters right now?!? Do you know where you are?!? Welcome... to Globnar!!!!!

The wall behind the guards opened revealing a massive futuristic area with many people fighting.

Mabel: Is this a reality show? Are we in Japan?

Blendin: It's gladiatorial time combat!!! The winner gets a precious time wish, and then decides the loser's fate!!! And the two of you are officially challenged!!!

Blendin puts on some warrior paint. The twins look at each other and start to whisper. However, Mabel and I came up with a plan to escape.

Mabel: *clears her throat* Oh my stars, could it be?!? My little um... *reads the guard's name tag* Lolphy!!! It's me, you're great great great- *looks at Dipper who's signaling her to keep speaking* great great great- *looks at Dipper who signals her to stop* great grandmother!!! From the past times!!!

Lolph: *glares at Mabel, then softens his grip on you* Gam-gam...?!?

Dipper: *quietly grabs the time measuring tape*

Blendin: *as the guard paints his face* Yeah, neon green is good, this is color for me, it's fierce- *notices Dipper with the time measuring tape and gasps* Oh no!!! You can't let them escape!!!

We all begin to run, and I was able to put in a time and we escape wherever we were. We end up on a mattress. That's... odd. We sat up a bit tired and groggy.

Dipper: Oh no, look!!! Mabel, the laser place is a mattress store!!! We went to far in the past!!!

Mabel: Time travel!!! Man, why you gotta be so complicated?!?

Dipper and Mabel: *gasp at the sight of the two guards and Blendin landing on another bed, then they hide under the bed they were on*

Dundgren: Looks like they overshot their destination by ten years.

Blendin: I don't see them, you better find those kids!!!

Lolph: You'll get your justice, Blendin.

Blendin: I'm gonna keep stammering until you find them!!! I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-!!! *leaves*

Lolph: I hate that guy.

Dundgren: Let's move.

Guards: *leave*

Dipper: *as they both crawl out* Ok, we've just got to go forward five years, we can be back before (y/n) even realizes we were gone.

Mabel: *picks up the time measuring tape with a gasp* The timey thing!!! It's busted!!!

Dipper: *takes the time measuring tape* I think I can fix it, I'll need some tools. And I think I know where to get some. *looks at the Mystery Shack sign outside*

We started walking to the shack. Once there, I began searching for the tools I needed it. As I did, I noticed  a girl who seemed to be around eight years old near the vending machine.

Girl: *looking at the stuck snack in the vending machine* Oh c'mon, seriously?!? That was my only dollar!!! Stupid thing!!!

Mabel: *walks over* Don't worry, I know a trick! *punches the machine a few times before elbowing it, opening the machine, taking out a few bags* Jackpot!!! *gasps*

Little You: Whoa!!!! That's so cool!!!! *take the bags* Thanks, miss!!! *walk away*

Mabel: ....... *runs over to Dipper* Dipper, Dipper!!! Look!!!

Dipper: *sees you* ... No. Way.

Little You: *leave the shack*

Mabel: *gasp* Maybe we can find out why she hates her birthday!!!

Dipper: But we have to go back now!

Mabel: But this might be our only chance!!!

Dipper: ... *sigh* Fine...

We followed (y/n) to a small house. I recognized it, it was the house we dropped (y/n) at back when we went mini golfing. It was hers.

That's when two older guys walked over, yanking her snacks away.

Little You: HEY!!!

Boy 1: Oops! Sorry, sis!

Boy 2: But these are our snacks now!

Little You: But I paid for those!!! They're my birthday snack!!!

Boy 1: Finders keepers!

Little You: *reach for your snacks* Give it back!!!

Boy 2: *harshly pushes you back* Back off!!!

Little You: *fall harshly, hurting your arm*

Dipper and Mabel: !!!

Dipper: *growls before trying to go to you*

Mabel: *pulls him back, whispering* Dipper, no!

Boys: *laugh*

???: What's going on here?!?!?

Boy 1: Mom!

Boy 2: (y/n)'s bothering us!

Little You: No I wasn't!!! You stole my snacks which I bought with my own money!!! For my birthday!!!

Mom: Do NOT disrespect your brothers, (y/n)!!!

Little You: BUT THEY-!!!

Mom: GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!

Little You: *holding back tears* ... *run inside*

Dipper and Mabel: ... *hide back under the bus*

Mabel: So that's why (y/n) hates her birthday...

Dipper: No one ever cared enough to celebrate it with her...

Mabel: So... how much partying can fix that...?

Dipper: *gets squirted with water by young Robbie*

Young Robbie: Haha, dorks!!! Young Robbie!!!

We wanted to help (y/n) in some way. We heard Blendin's frustrated yells near and hid. We overheard them talking.

Blendin: They've gotta be around here somewhere!!! I-I think I heard them!!! *points at a tree*

Lolph: Freeze!!! *shoots the tree revealing young Robbie hiding behind it*

Young Robbie: *runs away crying*

Lolph: Trace their chrono signatures.

Blendin: Man, the sooner I defeat those kids in Globnar, the sooner I can get my time wish!!!

Dundgren: Tell you what I'd do if I had a time wish: retire early, spend more time with the kids.

Blendin: "Nya nya nya nya nya with the kids!!!" Don't you know a time wish can literally do anything?!? Any imposible problem solved just like that?!? I mean imagine the possibilities!!!

Dipper: *whispers* Wait, Mabel, that's it!!! The time wish!!! We defeat Blendin in that space battle-

Mabel: *whispers* Then we can wish that her family was nicer and celebrated all her birthdays and (y/n)'s birthday would be fixed forever!!! All of them!!!

Mabel: *whispers* Do you really think you can win Globnar?

Dipper: *whispers* It's the only chance we have. Besides, it's for (y/n). She would do the same for us.

Dipper and Mabel: *nod to each other before coming out of their hiding spot with their hands pulled up in surrender*

Dipper: Here we are, Blendin, we surrender.

Blendin: It's them!!!

Dundgren: Freeze!!! *points the gun at the twins*

Lolph: Careful, they're from the past, they might have powder muskets or slap bracelets!!!

Dipper: Look, guys, no tricks this time, we're ready to challenge you.

Blendin: YES!!! Let the Globnar begin!!! Prepare- For- GLOBNAAAAA-!!!! *gets muted by one of the guards*

Lolph: Hey, turns out I can mute him!

Dundgren: Man I'd wish we'd known that earlier!

Lolph: Initializing!!!

We get zapped back into the futuristic arena, only this time in the center of it all. Just then, a giant baby came up from the ground.

Time Baby: Silence!!!

Random Person: Wooooo, oh yeah!!!

Time Baby: *zaps the person with laser eyes*

Mabel: ...that is one big baby.

Time Baby: Welcome, Globnar tributes!!! I have a very important nap to get to so let's make this quick! You each have a chance to settle your time feud through gladiatorial combat!!! *makes some transparent purple weapons appear*

Robot: *holding a bottle with a galaxy like substance* You have until Time Baby finishes the cosmic sand in this hourglass.

Time Baby: No!!!

Robot: *pokes Time Baby with the bottle* C'mon! It's good for you!

Time Baby: AH!!!

Robot: *gives the bottle to Time Baby who starts to drink the cosmic sand*

Blendin: Get ready, kids!!! When I get that time wish you'll wish you were never born!!! Or rather you'll wish you were born because I'm gonna wish you were never born!!!

Dipper: Dream on!!! There's two of us!!!

Mabel: And we have hair!!!

Blendin: Oh, yeah? Well I have training!!! *spins a spear around* What do you think I did in prison all this time?!?

Mabel: Uh-oh.

Time Baby: Let the Globnar begin!!!

The Globnar thing starts and we do many things. I have to admit, some of the challenges we did were kinda lame. Time passed, we had 763 and Blendin had 764.

Blendin: Yes!!! Blendin for the almost win!!!

Time Baby: There is only one final challenge for Globnar! An ancient game, thousands of years old!!! Chosen for its exemplification of your strategy!!! The ancient art... of laser tag!!!

Time Baby: *makes transparent purple walls and stairs* The one who touches the victory orb first will win!!!

Dipper: Seriously?

Blendin: Oh, I know it doesn't seem that challenging now but just wait until they turn on that fog machine!!! You'll be done for!!! You'll just wait until-!!!

Dipper: *shoots Blendin* ...

Blendin: Aw man...

Dipper: Mabel, grab the orb!!!

Mabel: *runs up* Got it!!! *touches the orb*

Time Baby: *finishes the cosmic sand* It is finished!!!!

Robot: *pats Time Baby's back causing him to burp*

Blendin: *sees you and the twins' score go up by a lot* No!!! No!!! No!!! Noooo-!!!!

Dipper and Mabel: Yes!!!

Time Baby: You have made victory in Globnar!!! Before I give you your time wish, tell us: what fate do you desire for the loser?

Blendin: Oh geez...

Mabel: DEATH!!!

Dipper: Mabel!!!

Mabel: Sorry, got carried away.

Dipper and Mabel: *turn around*

Dipper: So Blendin did try to wish us out of existence, but it was our fault for ruining his life.

Mabel: Yeah, and he's kinda too sad to be a real bad guy...

Dipper: Maybe if we treat him right in the present he'll turn out better in the future.

Dipper and Mabel: *face Blendin*

Dipper: Ok, as long as you keep an eye on him, we'd like to send Blendin free!!! And restore his position in the time anomaly correction unit!!!

Mabel: And give him pretty hair!!!

Time Baby: So be it!!! *makes Blendin's handcuffs fall*

Blendin: Wha-... What?!? You'd do that for me?!? *smiles as hair grows on his head* I got my job back!!! I feel like hugging somebody!!!

Lolph: I can kill you in eight different way.

Blendin: Yes, sir!!!

Time Baby: Now, children! *makes the orb go to the twins* What is it that you want for your time wish?

Mabel: Thank you, but the wish isn't for us.

Time Baby: Not you?!? But then who?!? Who is worthy to receive such power?!?

We go back to our original time to see (y/n) about to leave the laser tag arena. However, time stopped as she looked at the coin which now floated.

Dipper and Mabel: (y/n)!!!

You: Guys?!?

Dipper: We're so sorry we left you hanging!!! We got caught up im this time travel junk!!!

Mabel: And there was a time cyclops!!!

Dipper: And don't forget about the-!

Dipper and Mabel: Time race!!!

Mabel: But the point is, (y/n), I think we know how to fix your birthday...!

You: Fix my... what...?!?

Blendin: And that's not all. *clicks his watch which makes the time orb appear* Behold your time wish!!! The power to alter time wish paradox free in any way you choose!!!

Dipper: We think the only thing that can make you happy is wishing for the family you always dreamed of having.

Mabel: But the choice is yours.

You: And you guys went through all that trouble... just to get this for me...?

Dipper and Mabel: *nod with soft smiles*

You: ... *take a deep breath* Alright, here goes nothing! *touches the orb which makes a golden glow appear around you and the twins and heals the twins*

Dipper and Mabel: Wait, what...?!?

You: There. You guys seemed to have been through a rough time.

Dipper: But, (y/n), what about you family...?

You: Why would I wish for one when I already have the best family I could ask for...? You two, Stan, Soos, Wendy, you're better than anything I could wish for... And birthdays are suppose to be spent with people who care about you, and after all that you've done for me, I just feel stupid for not celebrating it with you guys... *hug them* Thanks for giving me the best birthday ever...

Dipper and Mabel: ... *smile and hug you back*

Blendin: Are you kidding me?!? Do you have any idea what you just wasted?!? Do you know how many have died to get a time wish?!? The wars that were started?!?

You: Oh, that's not all. I also wished for this slice of infinite pizza. *eats the pizza which regenerates*

Dipper, Mabel, and Blendin: *agree*

You: There are still ten minutes before laser tag closes, you guys wanna play?

Mabel: I'LL BEAT YOU ALL!!!

You: I DOUBT THAT!!!

And so we go play some more laser tag. It was fun! Can't wait to see our next adventure.

Thanks for reading!!! 'Till next time!!!

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