By the time I arrive at the hospital, Alex has fallen asleep. 

Jaxon (Justin? Jasper?) is burning a hole in the door from his little brother's hospital room with his glare and doesn't acknowledge me. I'm okay with that, because I have no desire in pretending things with Alex never happened. 

My boyfriend has pulled up his legs and is curled up in his seat, with his arms wrapped around around his knees and his head resting on them. He looks so adorable and sad and exhausted at the same time, I don't know what I should do first. Give him something to eat, give him a hug or let him sleep. 

I decide on granting him a few hours of rest and shrug off my jacket, then cover him with it. His little approving noise makes me wince, thinking I woke him, but luckily he stays asleep. 

He's probably been here for hours, even before he texted me. It's now three a.m. and even though he told me to just respond to him in the morning, I got out of bed and drove here. I couldn't handle the thought of him sitting all alone in a cold hospital, with hands trembling in fear and sore eyes from crying. 

The sight of him being worse than I'd thought breaks my heart. He's pale, with red spots around his eyes and a shudder going over his spine every now and then. 

I tuck the lost strand of hair back behind his ear, earning a better view of his closed eyes. I'm crouching in front of the chair he's sleeping on and probably look like a creep, but I couldn't give a fuck right now. All I care about is the boy in front of me who is worried sick. 

"Oh, for fuck's sake, get a room," J-dude mumbles from beside us. I don't even grant him an annoyed look, knowing he just wants a reaction. 

A deep sigh leaves Alexander's lips before he frowns in his sleep. I don't like seeing him unhappy, and certainly not in his few moments of peace, so I kiss those furrowed brows and watch as they disappear. 

Unfortunately, that woke him up, and his blue eyes slowly blink open. I rest an assuring hand on his, waiting for him to see me. He's disoriented at first, scowling as he looks around and tries to find out where he is. Always as charming. 

Then he sees me, and his scowl worsens. "Jake? I specifically told you not to come see me!" he groans, facepalming himself.

Knowing he's just preventing me from being as exhausted as he is, I smile and poke his hand, trying to get him to lower it again. "You're not the boss of me. Why can't I decide I want to look at your handsome face and come see it?"

That shuts him up. Instead of continuing to be mad at me, he wraps his arms around me in a tight hug and pulls me closer. I rub his back, comforting him. His whole body is tense, something I don't enjoy seeing. 

"I kind of did miss you," he whispers, his voice small. I press a kiss to his temple, careful not to leave his embrace. "I missed you too, sweetheart. How are you doing?"

It's funny to me how, now he's vulnerable and emotional, I'm the one calling him sweetheart. Talk about a reversed universe. 

"They-they said he's stable now. He's okay, but he needs lots of rest. I did well, they told me," he whispers, his fingers tightening their grip around my arms. I understand his silent wish to not see his face as he spills a few more tears, so I entangle my own fingers in his hair and comfort him like that. 

"I'm sure you did. And I'm glad he's fine. But what you didn't tell me is how you are feeling," I hint. Of course I'm aware he didn't accidentally forget to answer my question. 

He shrugs. "That doesn't matter. Kai is alright, and that's the most important." 

I shake my head. Yes, Kai's health is important, but so are his feelings. "It matters to me, Alex. How can I take care of you when I don't know what you need?"

Pulling back from him, I watch as he lowers his eyes. With a whisper, he answers, "I don't know what I need, Jake. I need Kai to be back home, alive and kicking. I need life to just give me a break. Why can't it do that? Why is everything spiraling out of control?"

"You know what, I'll fucking leave," J-guy rolls his eyes and does as he says. "Glad you can take a hint!" I call after him, but all I get is a middle finger. 

"And as for you. . ." I whisper, leaving the hug completely and taking place in the seat next to me. Immediately, he frowns and turns along with me, leaning into my touch the second I've stopped moving. 

"Once Kai is back home, you'll be able to spend lots of time with him. Because by then, finals are over and you've officially left that shithole. You can move in with us and go home with the holidays, if you want."

His body goes rigid in my arms before he lifts his head with wide eyes. If he were a cartoon character, multiple light bulbs would be floating around his head now. "I have an idea!"

I caress his cheek, making him press his face into my hand as he continues. "My mom is always complaining neither of her babies are home anymore. She misses having someone to take care of."

Oh God. I sense where this is going. "So what about I ask her to adopt Kai? Of course I have to check the whole legal registration stuff and if Kai's okay with that, if he won't return to his biological family, but wouldn't that be great?"

"Babe, I don't know if—"  "But what if it's a yes?" he begs. "What if Kai does want to be my little brother? I mean, his dad poisoned him! Surely court wouldn't let him return to them!"

I gently grab his hand, trying to figure out a way to tell him no. "Alex, I know this is a great solution and that it would make multiple people very happy, but don't get too excited already, okay? First of all, you don't know if Kai wants a new family. He's already traumatized as it is. Second of all, if he does want to get adopted, what makes you think he would choose you and your parents? You're amazing and I don't doubt for a second you're a great brother, but let's not pressure the little guy into all of this, alright?"

The little lights of joy in his eyes die out a bit again. It pains me to see, but it had to be said. I couldn't let another dream of his be crushed after hoping for so long. "Yeah, you're probably right."

"Alex—"

"No, it's okay. I just feel the need to fix this. Kai deserves so much more than he's lately received, and it really hurts me to see that happening. Back at the castle, he's labeled a problem child, but I've never seen him like that. He's just a kid, Jake. Every single one there is. They all deserve great parents, but their parents don't deserve them. A few of them are only four. Four! When I was four, I was clinging to my mom and laughing at ducks!"

I kiss the tip of his nose. "I know that's awful, and they definitely do deserve better. But you can't go and adopt all of them, Alex. This is a matter that doesn't lay in your hands. All you can do is make their stay at the castle more tolerable. Go out for a walk in the park, make up some games, organize a movie night. That's the most you can do."

He blinks his unshed tears away. "That's exactly what upsets me the most. I can't help them, even though I want to."

"You're doing a pretty good job at making it better, Alex," a voice sounds through the hallway. I look at my right, seeing the source of it. A boy, around twelve, with tubes all around him is staring at us with an opened door behind him. Kai, I suppose. 

With a dropped jaw, Alex stands up from his seat and hurries over to the boy. "What the hell are you doing here? You should rest!" 

I watch as my boyfriend becomes the most overprotective social worker Kai has probably ever soon. The guy is looking at him with distaste, as if he despises the protectiveness. "I'm fine."

"I know you are," Alex sighs. "But I'd rather have you go back to bed. Please?"

Though I didn't expect it, Alex sensed how Kai was feeling and changed his way of approaching things. Now that he's asked rather than ordered him to go to bed, the boy nods once before looking around him and taking me in. "Who are you?"

"You'll find out once you wake up," Alex interrupts. Kai just give him a really? look before walking to me and sitting down where Alex was sitting previously. I try to hide my smirk, if only to support my boyfriend. But actually, I can see why Alex adores Kai. 

"I'm Jake, Alex' boyfriend," I explain, offering him my hand. With a grin, he shakes it. "I didn't know Alex was gay! This explains so much!"

My boyfriend comes closer with a confused frown. "What the hell?"

Kai grins even wider. "You're always smiling at your phone and randomly, when you're staring at the wall!"

Alex glances at me briefly with a blush before shaking his head and denying it. "I'm never on my phone! And now, go to bed!"

"No," Kai shakes his head, scooting closer to me. "I like Jake. You'll have to bribe me, dude."

I muffle my laugh before nodding and going along. "Yeah, dude."

Alex gives me a dirty look before sighing and sitting down on the floor in front of us. "Fine. Then we'll just wait until Justin returns and freaks out when he sees you here." 

Now Kai freezes for a second before shaking his head and laughing nervously. "No, you're messing with me. Justin wouldn't stay here. Also, I totally want you to replace him as my brother." 

"Yes, I would, and ow?" 

With wide eyes, the three of us turn around and see Justin standing there, with a coke and a snack in his hands. He gestures something I don't understand. "The fuck do you mean, 'Justin wouldn't stay here?'"

Next to me, Kai starts trembling and throws himself towards Alex. It's a miracle his tubes stay in place. "Alex, w-why is he here?" 

"What the fuck are you doing?" Justin is making a scene, walking towards us rapidly. I get up just in time for him to be blocked from Kai's view. "Hey, man, I'm sorry, but maybe it's better if you leave for a few minutes. He's obviou—"

The asshole tosses me aside so harshly I almost fall. I'm about to grab the hem of his shirt and yank him backwards again when the nurse of the night shift comes to take a look at who's making such a noise at four a.m. "I am going to throw all of you—mister Harper! What are you doing outside your room?"

Kai cowers and makes his way to his door, then halts. The nurse gives him a pointed look. "Yes?" "Can Alex come along and stay in my room?"

The nurse looks in between the three of us, Alex, me and Justin. "Which one of you is Alex? Are you family of mister Harper?"

Alex raises his hand. "No, but I work in the foster care Kai is currently living. So technically—" "He's becoming my new brother!" Kai interrupts. 

The nurse sighs and gives up, clearly already tired. "You know what, fine. But if I get more trouble out of any of you, I'm going to make your lives hell once I die! Prepare to be haunted!"

A shudder goes over my spine as she leaves again. Somehow, I don't think she's joking. No, she's very, very serious. 

Alex and Kai return to Kai's room and close the door. I'm now along with Justin, which is something I don't like. He's glaring daggers at me, but I couldn't care less. 

"What is this shit?!" he whisper-yells. It seems he doesn't want to be haunted, either. 

"I'm not responsible for everything," I whisper back. "There must be a reason why Kai can't stand you, and why he's in foster care in the first place. Maybe it's better if you leave, Justin." 

"Fine," he seethes, grabbing his jacket and his snacks. "You know what, fine. Have fun with that miserable piece of shit. But don't bring him back when he's being a pain in the ass and doesn't listen even after you've tried hitting him. Believe me, he gets worse after!"

Unbelievable.