Boys are not supposed to cry.

Emil had taken those words to heart from a very young age. His father had been strong and had told him not to cry. As the man in the household, it was his duty to take care of his mother while his father was away fighting in the war. He had not cried even when she had fallen gravely ill and passed away.

To be completely honest, he could not have done it without Josh, a boy two years older than him who had become his best friend. At first, they had met only in school, but after both Josh's parents had gone to war, Emil's mother had invited him to stay with them.

With nobody left to take care of them, the boys had been forced to live in the shelter for war orphans, but after he had turned fifteen, Josh had been allowed to be Emil's guardian and move to his former house. The government provided them with barest necessities to get by, but they still tried to grow their own food in the large garden around the house as much as possible.

Life was harsh – it was harsh everywhere in the country -, but for these short years, Emil was happy. Happier than he had ever been after losing his father. Josh helped him study engineering from books his father had left behind – maybe he could become an engineer like he had and not be sent to the front lines. Even with every day filled with hard work, they still found time to laugh and tell each other spooky stories under the covers after dark.

It would not be long before the service time for his father would end and he could return home either. Then they'd all be a happy family again.

~*~*~

But instead of the happy reunion, one day a man wearing a military uniform showed up at their door and handed Emil a plain envelope before turning around and walking away. His hands shaking, Emil opened it and took out the piece of crimson paper within. This color only meant one thing, but he still didn't want to believe it until he had read the short message.

No...It couldn't be...It couldn't!

Josh was by his side, holding him and saying something over and over again. He couldn't understand the words, his mind too overwhelmed with the news of his father having fallen in battle. He just kept rocking back and forth, barely even aware of the world around him.

He must have fallen asleep from exhaustion at some point, since when he woke again, he was in his own bed. Josh was sitting at his bedside and holding his hand.

"I'm sorry about your father," the older boy said quietly.

"Why..." Emil whispered, his voice barely audible. "It would only have been a month longer..."

It was not fair! Why did he have to lose everyone he loved?!

Josh gently hugged him. "I'm here. I'll always be here."

~*~*~

Josh couldn't keep his promise. Soon after he turned 21 years old, he also received orders to join the military fighting the war somewhere far away.

Emil begged the soldiers taking the only person left in his life away that they'd let him go with him, but they only told him to get married and have children, all for the good of the country. His turn would come eventually.

That night, alone in his bed, he cried. He had promised not to cry, but it was just too much.

If Josh had gotten married, they would not have taken him so soon...Even if his heart had belonged to some girl instead of him, at least he would not have been gone. Ten years was a long time in the war. His father had not survived it. Was there any way that Josh would?

Not three months later, another crimson letter came.

Emil stopped caring. At first, he stopped leaving his house and taking care of the garden they had planted together. Then he stopped eating. There was no longer any reason to live.

~*~*~

It was raining, heavy droplets drumming against the roof. Occasionally a rumble of thunder could be heard from outside. Emil sat in the window alcove of his bedroom and stared blankly out the window.

He could hear the front door opening and closing, but he didn't move from where he was.

"Emil?" someone spoke to him.

The familiar voice made his hands resting on his lap tremble. It was just another dream. If he paid it no mind, his heart would not break again once it ended.

Josh's concerned face came to his field of vision. "Are you alright? You look like a mess."

Emil could only stare. "How...I...I thought you died..."

Josh gently framed his face with his hands. "I promised, didn't I? That I'd always be here."

"Yes..." The words seemed to get stuck in his throat as he reached to cover Josh's hands with his own. "Yes, you promised. So don't leave me ever again!"

Suddenly lightning flashed outside, and the lights went out. Emil hurried to grab Josh before he'd disappear like some ghost. That was when he saw it.

His beloved's eyes...They were like a cat's, with narrow pupils and glowing in the dark.

Josh – or whatever it was that looked like Josh – embraced him tightly, his soaked hair slowly dripping water on their clothes. But he was warm. And he smelled just like in his memories, that earthly scent just like their garden after rain.

Emil did remember the scary stories of monsters able to assume human shapes. They said that those monsters could only appear as someone they had killed. But...he didn't care. He'd pretend nothing had changed, that Josh was miraculously still with him.

He didn't want to be left alone again.