Story: Moira
Chapter Seven: Losing Control

Next morning, Harry slept in. He was usually an early riser and the only times he did sleep in, they were on particular occasions. The last time he did, he was hit with a powerful cruciatus curse for two minutes by his master as a part of his training. Ron even tried waking him up but the response to his calls was getting punched in the gut by his pseudo-brother.

When Harry finally woke up on his own, it was almost lunch time. He quickly freshened up and left the ship for lunch. After lunch, he decided to forget the memories of the previous day, so he walked to the grounds and hid behind a tree. When he was sure no one was near, he transformed into his animagus self.

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High above the ground, a black bird circled the castle, keenly observing the living and non-living alike. It swooped down to the lake, letting the water slightly wet its talons. The huge squid came up to the surface. Swiftly the raven rose above, one talon below the other to balance against the rush of wind which rustled its black feathers. It finally stopped, nearly fifty feet above the ground and noticed a person flying on a broom. Wanting to know who the person was, it started nearing the figure but was suddenly slashed across by a red ball of flame. It backed away and its green eyes widened at the bird facing it.

It was a magnificent phoenix. Its tail was aflame and its eyes a deep red. It squeaked then charged towards the raven. The latter managed to dodge once, but the phoenix was too fast for it to dodge the third time. Losing its balance, the raven started swiveling at top speed towards the ground, the phoenix hot at its tail. With a loud thud, the black bird crashed onto the ground, almost forming a crater. The phoenix was about to land on the black bird's body but a voice stopped it.

"FAWKES! STOP IT! PLEASE!" the voice was Ginny's. She dismounted her broom and ran towards the two birds. The phoenix looked imploringly at her. "What has this raven done to you?" she asked, whipping her wand out and inspecting the still raven. Fawkes the phoenix crooned lowly. "No Fawkes, attacking someone is not the solution. Master has always taught us to be non-violent. You are a bird of purity. Leave this raven alone and go back to Master's office."

Fawkes flew away reluctantly and Ginny placed a hand on the raven's wings. She gasped and withdrew her hand when the raven suddenly changed into a boy.

"Harry?!"

"Ruddy red chicken," Harry swore, clutching his right arm.

"Y-you are an animagus?" Ginny asked. Harry sighed in response. He could not help but transform back lest his injuries get the better of his raven form.

"Didn't you just witness it?"

"But why did Fawkes attack you? He's a really peaceful bird," Ginny asked, more to herself.

"Phoenixes and ravens are supposedly enemies. Or Dumbledore would have ordered it to attack – Ow!" Harry exclaimed as she hit his arm. "It is already broken, girl!"

"Sorry, not sorry. Headmaster Dumbledore would never hurt anyone!"

"You are his disciple, aren't you?!" Harry shouted, his naked green eyes meeting her brown ones.

"What if I am?"

"He has trained you to destroy me. I know your intentions now. The ruddy bird made it clear."

"Harry, it – it's nothing –"

"You can't fool me, Weasley. Sending anonymous letters, stalking for information, letting him lose control over his emotions, then finishing off the person, eh? I've grown into a more evil person than you and Dumbledore combined are!" Harry said harshly. Ginny bit her lower lip then moved her hand to hold his. He quickly withdrew his hand and backed away. "What are you playing at?!"

"Please, listen –"

"I have gone dea –" Harry's further words became inaudible as the witch in front of him cast a silencing charm.

"It is true that Master has been training me. It is also true that Master Dumbledore sent you that letter for you to kill Voldemort, but Master does not wish to kill you unless you become the next Dark Lord!

"I have belief in you, Harry, that you will never become a Dark Lord. I have risked my life by telling you this secret. I'll lose a small amount of my magic soon because of the blood pact I have signed with Master.

"Harry, Master Dumbledore is a really wise man. He wants the Wizarding World to be safe. You, more than any of us, know that Voldemort would have been really terrible if he were to use you and rule the world. To counter that, I was trained. I–I don't know why me of the whole world or why you of the whole universe, but that's what happened. . . I can't change anything. I don't want to duel you or kill you. Harry, you have a pure heart inside that covering of rock. Please. . . just please change for the better," Ginny pleaded, her eyes glimmering with unshed tears.

Harry turned away with a grim lip and closed his eyes. She sighed then lifted the silencing charm off of him, then started healing his bruises from the fall.

"You don't know what it feels like," Harry breathed. "You don't know what it feels like to lose your family, be given away to some crazy lunatic by your only family, be trained to know power, trained to be submerged in Dark Arts and darkness, be isolated with no one to understand you. You don't know how bad the temptations of using a dark spell are! You don't know how much it hurts to turn into a traitor and kill your own Master, the one who more than partially raised you. You don't know what it feels like," Harry stated. His voice was barely above a whisper.

"I know, Harry. Not as much as you, but I do know. I had to be given away to my master to practice defense against the Dark Arts from the time I was able to hold a wand – from when I was five years old. I could not see my family as I wished. I could not enjoy my childhood. I had to train hard, every single damned day so that one final day, I'll defeat a completely unknown, powerful bloke. I have lost my brother too. A brother I have never seen. If you were to become a Dark Lord, the weight of the world would rest on my shoulder," Ginny whispered.

Harry looked at her and saw a single, lone tear slide down her cheek. "Girls wish to be princesses but I was destined to be a warrior. I turned into a Ginny which I never would have if it weren't for this whole situation."

"Which Moira caused," Harry supplied. She looked at him with teary eyes and nodded slowly. Gently, she placed her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

"I do not wish to harm you, Harry."

"Neither do I. . . I guess."

After a minute of silence, Ginny spoke up. "T-there is another secret of mine. A secret of sorts, but I do not think it is the right time to tell that."

"Tell me when the time is ripe. . . because I do not understand one thing," Harry paused, looking confused.

"That is?"

"I. . .I don't know. . . It's just that. . . it feels different. . . when I confide in you, I feel light. As if there is nothing holding us back. I feel. . . belonged. I get this. . . this strange feeling which I have never experienced before. . . Ginny, what is this? What is happening to me? Is this wrong? Am I doing something wrong again?"

Ginny smiled knowingly. "Just know that it is a good thing. You'll come to know sooner. You need to be more accepting, Harry. Receiving help isn't a bad thing. You shouldn't bottle up your thoughts and emotions, fearing to be weak. Those who cry aren't weak. They cry because they have been strong till that very moment they broke down."

Harry closed his eyes as he realised that she had been through as much as he had, if not more. Leaving your family behind when they were alive and wanting you was no easy task. Harry did not have to do that. He never had a family. Sure, Ron and Sirius were his family, but he never felt truly like a son or a brother.

"You are already good, Harry. If you were rock-hearted, you wouldn't have killed your master for the sake of saving a million lives. If you were cold hearted, you would not have taken Fawkes' hits instead of retaliating. You are a good man, Harry. A good wizard who has suffered from childhood," Ginny explained.

Voldemort's voice resonated as a venomous hiss in his mind. "If you have to be powerful, you must sacrifice everything."

Harry suddenly bolted up straight, shaking Ginny off of his shoulder in the process. He shook his head vigorously, holding it as if someone was talking to his mind. "No. No! I can't turn good. I am born to be evil!"

"Har –" Ginny tried, but he shouted.

"NO!" He was breathing rapidly and his eyes darkened. Ginny gulped. "Don't try." His whisper sent chills down her spine as he looked sternly at her.

"Yo–you aren't possessed, are y–you?"

"I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU!" Harry shouted, standing up from his spot. Ginny did not know what to do. He was shaking madly and his eyes were turning red. The weather started changing suddenly and a strong breeze started rustling the leaves of the nearby trees with a force otherwise impossible. A loud thunder rumbled above and rain bearing clouds formed over their heads. "I have nothing to do with you. Nothing. You will not waste my time," saying so, Harry pointed his wand at her.

"Expel –" Ginny tried wandless magic but he made a slashing motion and she fell on her side. Her wand fell into the lake.

"Don't try, Weasley. You will not succeed." His voice was low and eerily calm, making it more terrifying. Ginny sat up slowly, meeting his eyes with as much love as she could muster.

"You need to see love, Harry. Love is the most –"

"USELESS FEELING!" Harry completed in a loud voice.

"The most wonderful and powerful emotion," Ginny continued, as if he had never interrupted. His eyes flashed with anger.

"You dare talk back to me!"

"Yes I dare!" Ginny challenged.

"Crucio!" Harry bellowed, temptation taking the best of him.

Ginny closed her eyes and a newly formed boulder shattered in front of her. A ruby-encrusted sword materialized into her hand and she wielded it in time to deflect his next unforgivable. She got to her feet soon.

"Harry. This isn't you! Is this some –" she bent down to avoid another curse of his. "–blood pact you have signed with Tom?!"

"It's none of your business."

"Help me to help you, Harry."

"Everything is a lie! The world is a lie! Everyone are traitors! They only need their work to be completed! They only fear their lives. They don't care about anyone else! Not an orphaned baby! Not an abused boy! Not me! You are the same kind. The kind of people who sweet talk and later stab. You are all cowards! COWARDS!" Harry shouted.

Ginny felt hot tears burn her eyes. This was the paragraph etched in his mind for Merlin knows how long. "I do not want to hurt you. If you want proof –" Ginny threw her sword away and it landed with a 'clink' about five metres away. "I'm disarmed."

"This is no proof."

This time, Ginny had no escape. If Harry were to finish her, the world would end soon, but she could not do anything. She did not want to hurt the boy who had taken as much pain as she had. So she let him hurt her instead and closed her eyes as he prepared to shoot the deadly curse.

"Accio wand!" a new, familiar voice commanded in a stern tone. Ginny opened her eyes in relief to see her master standing there, his robes and hair swaying with the powerful gust of wind. Power was emanating from him in huge amounts.

"You old fool! Give me back my wand!" Harry shouted. Dumbledore merely smiled.

"Dear Harry, you need to let out your emotions, but that does not mean you lose control of your power," Dumbledore said calmly.

"I don't need your advice!"

"You need help."

Harry waved his hand at Dumbledore, who erected a quick shield. Harry's non-verbal and wandless spell cracked through Dumbledore's shield. Dumbledore looked at Ginny with a look which clearly told her what to do. She nodded reluctantly and felt her sword materialise in her hand. She charged towards him, sword above her head. He looked at her and, in a second, clutched the incoming sword with his hands. The sharp metal dug deep into his palms. Suddenly, he was thrown into the water. He realized a bit too late that it was a ploy to let Dumbledore attack him, but before he could retaliate, his vision was covered in black spots and that was the last thing he saw before he drowned.

So there was the drama I talked about in the last chapter. Hope you liked it!

That was one long chapter. It crossed 2k words so I decided to put a cliffhanger. ;)

Thanks for reading!

Miyoko x