Chapter Fifteen: Tell All...

Halaat's POV.

The next day Ayat called and told me that she's in Kuwait with her husband Fahim. They had just arrived from America early in the morning and came home straight away. Fahim is the best brother in law. His charming personality, funny jokes and stories about business deals. He is an interesting guy.

Ummi is still in her room, I guess she's still sleeping. Ummi has to undergo iddah ( a period of waiting). As she must observe the death of her husband my father. Ayat and her husband are in the guest room,resting. Hussein and I are in the kitchen having breakfast. Hussein was telling me his plan, of how he was going take over my room, I started laughing and I almost chocked on the food I was eating. He was also asked about father. After breakfast I decided to go back to my room and call Adam. As I was walking towards my room. I noticed my mothers door slightly open, I heard my mothers voice.

"They must never find out." I heard my mother's commanding voice. Yes I eavesdropped, but I didn't mean too. I walked away and went to my bed room. I wonder who she was talking too.

I walked into my room and I immediately noticed a small brown plain box sitting on my bed. I haven't seen it before. I walked towards the box and opened it. They were letters in the box. All of them had the same thing written on the envelope, To Halaat. As I was removing one of the letter, I heard footsteps behind me. I looked back and it's Ayat.

"Ummi told me that his things were brought here a few days ago. It seems father wrote you letters," Ayat said.

"Did you get letters?" I asked curiously.

"Yes I did," she said in a low voice.

"I'll leave you to read in peace," she said. Ayat than left the room.

I sat on my bed and opened one of the letter and started reading. Half way through the letter I was almost in tears.

Dear Halaat,
Assalam alaykum, I hope you are good. Ummi told me that you have already started working and you got married, mabruk. Do you still eat sweets before you go to sleep? Maybe you've grown out of it.

If you are reading this letter, that means I am dead. I know you must hate me, but let me explain. I had to leave because I was sick, I was dying. I had coronary heart disease. And I had to be treated. I didn't have the strength to tell you that I am going to die sooner or later. After the treatments, my condition improved but the doctors told me they wanted to monitor me. I only had the pictures of you Ummi sent me, to remember you.

I haven't seen you for thirteen years. I was in misery without hearing your complains about your sister and school. I wasn't strong enough to talk to you after all these years, I know you hate me. I hope you understand and forgive Ummi and me. I just couldn't let you go through a life with a weak father. When I finished my surgery, I was advised to stay in a quiet, peaceful place. Any loud noises could affect my heart condition and it could get worse. I had to remain in London. I always prayed that one day I come across your face, just get a glimpse. I always wanted to come back one day when I got better. But it seems God planned otherwise and he is the best of planners. My money will be in your bank account, hopefully the lawyers have done the necessary. Money won't prove how much I love you but I hope my words will. keep me in your prayers.

Love is strong and it strengthens because it's real. Don't ever leave those who love you, no matter the circumstances.
‎
‎'Ahubbak ya 'umirati (I love you my princess).

Sincerely,
Your father Abdul Malik.

•••••••••••••••••

It felt like a 'truth' bomb had aimed at me, without caution nor warning. I felt so heartfelt and emotionally unstable. I just didn't know what to feel. My father left because of his health problems and all along I thought otherwise.

I started reading another letter. And I couldn't believe my eyes. I had to analyse it thrice, before I could comprehend the information properly. They are six letters in the box. I read all of the six letters. I was left speechless and with mixed emotions. In each letter, he mentioned the word forgive.

Father made Ummi promise not tell us about his condition, and for that I understood my mother's words.

"You can't save people, you can only love them."

But how was I supposed to love my father, when I thought he was coward and a betrayer. How was I suppose to love him? When the truth was unknown to me. I sat in my room and thought of the truths that were revealed in the letters. I feel at peace but so estranged. 

I decided to take a shower. I than wore my causal dress and than went down stairs. Hussein and Ayat were sitting in the living room. Hussein is playing the video game and Ayat was on her phone.

"Halaat what's wrong?" Ayat asked. Ayat could always spot if something was wrong with me.

"Nothing," I replied briefly." Hussein did you get letters from father?" I asked changing the subject.

"Nop," he replied still concentrating at the game. I went into the kitchen and stood by the counter. I was lost in my thoughts, when a phone call interrupted me. It was Adam calling me. I completely forgot to call him. I was caught up in the letters and yesterday I was so busy with mother I forgot that I had to call Adam. I immediately picked up the phone and greeted him.

"Assalam alaykum," I said.

"Walikum Salam Halaat," he replied.

"How are you?" I asked.

"Well, I have been better..." he said in a low voice.

"What's wrong?" I asked concerned.

"Nothing really."

"So you don't miss me?"

"What do you mean I don't miss you? You are all my heart ever talks about," he replied.

"Hmm you know I love you," I said and smiled.

"I know I know," he replied.

"Okay good."

"Talk to you later hayati (my life) I am driving," he told me.

"Together?"

"Forever," he said than hang up. We had our own way of saying we love each.

Adam texted me and informed me that he is coming to Kuwait next week on Friday. I miss him honestly. I wish he was here, he would have said something to comfort me and I would have hugged him. And things would be less sad. Ayat came into the kitchen and starred at me funny.

"Hah sorry if I am interrupting," she said while laughing.

"No you are not,"I said seriously.

"Halaat's what's wrong?" She asked concerned.

"Nothing."

"Halaat I know you. I know how act when something is disturbing you,"

"If you know me so well, you know I hate lies," I told her.

"What are you talking about?" She asked, confused.

"When were you going to tell me?" I asked in a loud tone.

"Tell you what?" She asked, her eyes weary.

"That Hussein is your son!" I yelled out of frustration. 

"What are you talking about?" She spoke, sounding rather brittle.

"Don't play dumb with me Ayat. I read all of the letters father and Hussein wasn't mentioned at all. Except in one letter, the letter that explained how Hussein is not my brother but my nephew," I said angrily.

"Halaat I can explain..."

"You lied to Hussein and me. This explains the year you were away with Ummi. I felt bad for you because you couldn't have kids and all this time... And for some reason you deny us the truth. I had to learn the truth from a letter, not any letter but a letter from my dead father," I said with a harsh tone. I stopped talking when I saw Ayats tears rolling down her cheek. I got out of the kitchen and went to my room.

All these truths. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to feel. I sat on my bed, confused and angry. I heard a soft knock on the door. Maybe it's Ayat I thought. I opened the door only too see Ummi with her sad face. She came into the room and closed the door.

"You have no right," She said in a stern voice.

"Ummi but..." I tried to speak.

"The tongue is a small thing but what enormous damage it can do," my  mother said in a modulating voice.

"Why did you lie to Hussein and me?" I asked her looking at my hands.

"Don't criticise what you can't understand." She's speaking in proverbs again... I never seem to understand them when my emotions are running wild.

"I understand that I was lied to," I told her and looked at her.

"Halaat some stories are better left unread," She said.

"Ummi enough with the proverbs and sayings. I want an explanation, I want to understand..." Ayat opened the door and closed the door behind her. She stood by the door.

"I...I was raped," she mumbled. I stood frozen and still after her statement. I started thinking about what I said earlier. I lowered my head and starred at the floor, ashamed. The letter my father wrote didn't explain how Ayat got pregnant, but just a statement. In the letter my late father wrote, he thought I already knew. My mothers wise words started echoing in my head,"Some stories are better off left unread."
Ayat's pain, I could almost feel it through her words. It's all my fault. I should have thought twice.

After saying those words she left the room leaving Ummi and I in the room. My bitter words caused a rift between my sister and I. I hope Ayat will forgive me. If only...

******************

The truth is out, secrets revealed. Who will tell Hussein about his true identity? Acceptances or Denial? Forgiveness or not? Oh and Halaat's birthday is coming up...

Thanks for reading:)