Monday, May 8th, 2017. 7:30 AM. 

• • •

A slight breeze blew in swaying the light grey curtains I had over my window. The fresh air caressed my cheek as I laid on my back staring at the ceiling, willing myself to get up. Most days I'm okay, the darkness doesn't loom over my shoulder as often, I've learned to manage my life without him even if it's something I hate doing.

My toes curl against the cool silky fabric of my sheets, and I sigh knowing I can't lay here too much longer, but I shut my eyes relishing in the free time I have- if just for a few moments more. Suddenly, a car backfires outside my window, and my breathing quickens, my muscles tightens, and my heart nearly bursts from my chest. My breath comes in quick gasps as flashes of that night burst in front of my tightly shut eyes. I can still smell the burning and hear his screams. It won't get out of my head- his body lifeless on the ground, the feeling of his hair between my fingers as I had removed debris from his locks.

There's stirring behind me, and an arm tightens around my waist, I can feel his body heat as he pulls me close and then suddenly it's gone, and I whimper.

"Hey, calm down," He shifts on the bed and leans over me his breath hot on my cheek as he talks me through my panic attack.

"Relax, good. You're safe." His voice pulls me from the horrible memories, and I pry my eyes open to his cool blue ones staring down at me, his brow slightly furrowed.

A hand caresses my cheek for a few more moments until my breathing is back to normal and I smile at him.

"Hey," He greets.

"Hi."

"It's good to have you back, Annie."

His warm lips place a kiss to my forehead before he gets up from bed tugging on his pajama pants and then coming over to my side. He helps me sit up and offers the glass of water next to my bed. I sip it and hold the thin sheet to my chest before taking the t-shirt he's offering me. Once I have it over my head, I realize it's his, huge, warm and his warm cinnamon scent entirely takes me.

"That's the second one this month. Should you go see Dr. White?"

"No, I'm okay; I think I'm just nervous about the interview." I offer.

His dark blonde brows come together as he thinks over my answer hands resting on his hips. I take in his stable, muscular figure and the small love bite on his collar bone.

"My Heroes Park interview in May."

The uneasy feeling lingers in the pit of my stomach, and I swing my legs over the bed and stand up quickly moving towards the bathroom. He follows me, grabbing his toothbrush before I grab mine. We share toothpaste and brush our teeth in silence for a few moments before I take my brush out of my mouth and look at him in the mirror.

"Ben. I know it makes you uncomfortable when I have to do things that deal with him, but it is my job," I shove my toothbrush back into my mouth and scrub away watching him do the same.

"It's not that. You know it's not that. I hate what he's doing to you even from beyond the grave. This is your second one this month, I don't want you to push yourself too hard," He trails off as he catches my stare in the mirror.

Ben and I have a unique understanding when it comes to my job. At the beginning of the year, I was tasked with writing an article every other month to show how the world faired with and now without Superman. It had taken a toll on me when I first met Ben, and I agreed to scale back, back then my attacks were more frequent, and I couldn't even look at his photo without hyperventilating. Ben thinks the reason why I was having such an overwhelming reaction was that I had never gone to speak to an actual grief therapist. I just relied on the group. After some convincing I allowed him to set me up with a friend of his therapist and the sessions worked. Ever since I've been able to do my job without little disturbance, but lately I haven't had much luck. He knows that the media, the fans, the memories of that night are not going to go away and I won't let them, so he's succumbed to the idea of in a way coming second to the "icon status" I already have.

I spat for the final time and swished mouth wash around before spitting and turning to him.

"Babe, I'm fine. I haven't been to the park since the anniversary, and I'm just getting nervous. The fan mail is coming in more frequently now, and even the press is taking more footage. Remember, last week at the Thai restaurant?"

Ben had finished brushing his teeth, and I walked up to him wrapping my arms around his muscular torso. He held me and rested his chin on my head.

"I just worry about you,"

"I know."

We held each other in the early morning, his fingers raking through my hair lightly. He was telling me about a new software he was testing at work, and I was lost in thought, my mind a year and seven months away.

8:35 AM.
• • •

"So wait how did you get him to spill the oh so scared beans?"

Lois and I were in the break room, and she was explaining to me how she was able to talk to the man who killed his family. The bodies were found in a nearby park, buried in shallow graves. The story had made headlines because his little boys were all under the age of seven just four months ago, and there was evidence stacked up against him, and he was found guilty in the court of law, but he had never said what had happened or why he did what he did. Perry had the great idea of sending Lois to interview him, and the majority of it was taped, but his confession was cut because he didn't want his mother to hear what he was capable of from his own mouth.

I leaned against the counter sipping my coffee as she heated her scone in the microwave.

"Don't you just love it when the chocolate is warm?" She wondered aloud.

"Lois, the confession?"

"Right."

We sat down at the table that was slightly sticky from Fred's maple syrup from his IHOP leftovers, and she explained how she got him to confess. I listened to her talk and watched her eyes light up and go big as she got into the story. Lois and I haven't seen eye to eye in a long time, but after I blew up at her last year, she's attempted to be more cordial and not say what's on her mind as much around me. We had a long, in-depth talk about the boundaries of our relationship and the relationship that she and Clark had. Lois loved him, and that was evident, but he wasn't in love with her anymore, and she had to come to terms with that. She was trying so hard to hold onto the Clark she knew and not divulge in the one the world painted him as and she confessed to being jealous that I was there when he died and not her.

I remember Lois saying it wasn't fair that she was the one who had been there from the beginning of his journey as Superman to being someone who learned about his death on the news. She had genuinely thought they would get back together that he would realize he loved her as much as she loved him, but then she saw our first interview. She hated herself for thinking he wasn't capable of moving on, and later he died in my arms, and she knew that she was never going to be the one he went back to, no matter how hard she wished for it. We were both mourning a loved one, but wouldn't allow the other to have the same range of emotions. It was almost as if we both believed the other wasn't worthy of loving him. Our conversation had surprisingly stayed on a normal voice level, and towards the end, we agreed to try to be friends as close as we can be seeing as she was the ex-girlfriend of my dead boyfriend.

I watched her speak, happy to see that the light had returned to her eyes too and that her overall mood had shifted into a happier one.

• • •
Monday, May 8th, 2017. 1:35 PM
• • •

Later on that day, during lunch hour while I was eating my leftover noodles, trying hard not to slurp Perry beckoned me into his office. I quickly swallowed the hot noodle I had in between my teeth and wiped my mouth, hurrying after. When I entered Perry's office and shut the look, he had a very odd look on his face. He was looking at something on his computer screen, and for a moment I just watched him before he gestured for me to sit down.

"Have you seen the news?" He asked pulling away from his screen to lean back in his seat.

"Is that a trick question?" I chuckled, but his facial expression told me jokes were not in order today. I sat up straight and cleared my throat, "No, I haven't checked the news today. I've been a bit busy with my article."

He nodded and turned his screen towards me. At first, the footage was dark, and you could hear little boys whispering, and suddenly the camera was pulled up from the view of their shoes to reveal building on fire with fireman all around and then Clark was there. His bright suit and voice made me gasp, and I leaned forward barely blinking, taking in all he was saying to the kids, and just as quickly as he appeared, he was gone.

Taken aback I cleared my throat, "I haven't seen that one before."

"It's not too hard to see the video, is it? There has been an influx of footage of him from past rescues that have been coming in. I want you to watch the videos and put them into words for your article." He responded almost a bit hesitantly. Almost as if he wasn't sure I was ready for this.

I nodded, "Okay, that shouldn't be a problem." Sensing the feeling I had this morning was stirring I moved to leave, but he clicked on another video.

"My Howard is a good man. He's a provider. And these aliens are gonna...probe him?..." He let the video play as he began to speak. I could hear the woman threatening the "aliens" in the background.

"There have been a few other rumors that scientists at STAR labs have also been abducted and while you didn't get this from me," He shuffled a few papers on his desk before handing me a rough drawing, "This is the perp."

In my hands was a rough drawing of what looked like a man with large eyes and wings sprouting from his back. Frowning, I looked up at him.

"Did a child draw this?"

"Yes. She said her father was taken last night. SHe's the only witness."

"Perry, you really can't be entertaining this can you?" I tossed the paper back onto his desk. He collected it and placed it into a new folder.

"The world had Superman. Who's to say he was the only alien out there? Can you hit up your friend and ask for some intel?"

"Batman? I thought you didn't like Batman."

"Where there's a story, we follow doesn't matter to me where you get the information from." And with that, he dismissed me by turning his attention to his emails and placing his glasses on the bridge of his nose.

I sighed and walked out of the office towards my desk. Out the corner of my eye, I saw the bright blue of Lois' blouse in the breakroom window and walked over. The low murmur of voices greeted me as I placed my hand on the knob. I stilled at who I heard.

"I found a little place. By the diner. Suits me just fine," Martha said.

"I wish you'd said something."

"Oh, no. I got behind on the payments. And you know the bank jumps like a cougar if you miss by a dime. The Place was too big for me, anyway. Shuffling around like an old ghost."

"Well, I might have been able to talk to someone, or..."

I turned the knob and walked in.

"Martha? You lost the house?"

Both women turned to me. Lois took this moment to excuse herself, squeezing my arm as she walked past. I heard her greet a younger employee outside before I shut the door. Martha smiled at me and shifted the pale yellow sugar packet around in her fingers.

"Martha, why didn't you tell me? I could have helped. I have money in my savings-,"

"I didn't want to bother you. Lois had already offered to help, and I turned her down too. With your therapy and work, I didn't need to add "mother-in-law" to the list." She stopped short her eyes darting to my ring finger and then to my neck. Subconsciously, I placed my thumb along where the band of the ring would be on my finger.

I haven't worn it in months, not since I've been dating Ben, but I don't tell her that.

"Not that I was ever..."

I placed my hand on her arm, "It's okay."

She smiled back and sipped her tea," What's your take on the abductions?"

I raised an eyebrow, "Oh, and here I thought you didn't watch the news."

"I only do when I think there are news stories worthy for you."

"Oh, I'm uh working on a monthly article. I don't think I want to jump into the "alien abduction" story just yet." I had comically raised my fingers to make air quotes.

She nodded, "There's so much bitterness. Of course, I think it's because he's gone. But I suppose a mother does."

A lull of silence seeped between us and then there was a knock, and Lois popped her head in.

"Perry said he emailed you all of the videos. I think he wants to see you at your desk," She told me, her brows coming up slightly at the distance between Martha and me.

• • •
Monday, May 8th, 2017. 4:55 PM
• • •

As the hours lulled on, I kept watching video after video, and my mind kept drifting back to what Martha had said. It was evident that the moment he died something shifted in the world and it was thrown into chaos more foul and horrible than ever before. My eyes glanced to my purse laying across my desk, and I wondered if there was some truth in her words. I pulled out my phone and quickly texted the one person I knew would tell me.

They're here because he's gone.

Seconds later he responds and my heart sinks.

Yes.