Jaise koi kinaara, deta ho sahara...
Mujhe wo mila, kisi mor per....

Auro ko to hardam sayaa deta hai,,,
Khud dhoop main hai khara wo magar.

Chot lagee hai ussay phir kiun mehsoos mujhe horaha?

Dil tu bata de, kiya hai irada tera???

___________

Returning back to Islamabad the family doctor was called and azlan was prescribed antibiotics and suggested rest.

Meher forgetting about everything had looked after him with all her heart though at many times he had stopped her but she never listened.

Today finally he was feeling really very better so hence they both were going to meet saqib who was constantly calling them from a few days.

There was pin drop silence in the car. Both were equally dwelled in their own thoughts. Azlan though wished he never had gotten better.

_________

Reaching the decided destination. Azlan stayed back in the car while meher went out to have a talk with saqib. He was waiting outside in the lawn area. Azlan could see the two from his cars wind screen.

He was thoroughly looking at meher, her moving lips, her bowed eyelids. Her serious face. He sighed thinking of all the moments he had with her. He was a rebelious kind of a man but in front of her he was always obedient.

As the time was passing he was realising he couldent just leave meher ever. She had made a significant place in his heart. His breathing was getting heavier, his eyes getting alittle wet. What had life done to him? This was all a game and in the prize he had lost his heart and soul.

______

"Meherwish tum sab baat samajh gai ho na? Bus ab azlan shah tumhe divorce dega to hum aik sath hojayengay." Planning everything saqib stated at last and she took a deep breath.

"Saqib mujhe kuch time chahiye." She voiced out.

"Kis chez ka time meherwish?" He asked.

"Sab kuch settle karne ka, meri family, azlan ki family pata nahi kia sochegi, kaisa react karegi?" She said.

"Apni maa kay baray me socho bus. Azlan shah ki tumhe fikar karne ki zaroorat nahi hai, wo janay or uski family, humara kaam itna hi tha meherwish." He snapped at her and she looked at him shocked.

"Azlan shah ki ama jan or baba sayeen mere sath maa baap se barh kar rahe hain, main aise hi boldoo jaaker unhe kay main to apke bete se talaq leke jaa rahi hoo. Think rationally saqib."
She said angrily. Her mind was already frazzled.

"Ye naya layi ho meherwish, kamal hai. Pehle ye sab sochna tha."
He was getting insane. This seemed against his plan.

"Mujhe kuch andaza nahi tha kay wo log kaise niklenge. Mene nahi socha tha kay sab itne achay hongay."
She stated fidgeting with her fingers.

"Agar azlan shah se mohabat ka bukhar charh gaya hai ya uski dolat dekh kar u turn lia hai to main batadoon tumhe that he is the same notorious ezi, the playboy ezi jiska sunker tum maan nahi rahee theen iss nikkah per!"
Saqib nearly yelled and she flinched at his words and tone.

"Main aisi nahi hoo or tum jantay ho!" She murmurred.

"Meher if you are done, then please go and sit in the car."
Azlan shah seeing the heated argument jumped down his car and  made his way to them.

"We are not done yet!" Saqib said looking at meher with fuming eyes.

"Oh yes we are! Or sab baten soch kar tumhe batadungi apna plan saqib!"
Staring into his eyes she said sternly and turned away.

"Mere paise dedo, balkay full payment kiunke meher to ab mere pas anay wali hai."
Taking azlan to a side saqib said and fuming in rage azlan held his collars.

"Tum meher ko use kar rahe ho, cash kar rahe ho. Tum usko ye sab btaogay ya main abhi chal kay batau!" He yelled.

"Tumhara damagh to nahi chal gaya. Yahi deal hui thi na, tumhe aik achi shareef larki mil gai thi to show to your parents or mujhe paise chahiye the bus! Aur meher ko time or apni toxic family se nijaat! Sab hogaya ab nahi mukrogay tum apne waday se." Saqib said.

"Meher masoom hai. Usne tumper trust kiya or tum usko use kar rahe ho. Main khamosh nahi bethunga, paise lelo apne per yaad rakhna usko main tumhare sath kabhi janay nahi dunga! Kabhi nahi! Ainda apna manhoos chehra mat dikhana werna mujhse bura koi nahi hoga!"
Handing him the cash azlan warned him.

"Tum aisa nahi karsaktay!" Saqib yelled.

"Main aisa hi karunga! Ainda meher kay kareeb nazar na aao tum!"
Yelling he turned to leave but bumped right into a fuming meher. He sighed hard. This was not supposed to happen! Not like this!. He was supposed to tell her himself!.

"Ye, ye kia horaha hai. Paise kiun de rahe ho tum saqib ko azlan."She had caught them. Saqib had went pale. And azlan knew a new trouble had come in.

"Just some loan." Saqib managed to say. Azlan shah was silent.

"Kitne loan logay saqib? Karachi me bhi loan tha?" She asked. Her suspicions were becoming reality.

"Tumne btaya isko?" Saqib screamed looking at azlan.

"Yahan kia chal raha hai btao mujhe azlan!" She demanded.

"He has been taking money from me since day 1. Contract se pehle yahi baat hui thi k paise lega mujhse."
Looking everywhere but at her he murmurred and saqib cursed.

"You guys were using me? Mujhe becha tumne saqib?" Tears were out of her eyes realising what was happening behind her back. She wasent for sale. That was not her worth.

"Is me harj hi kia hai itni to desperate theen tum! kuch ghareeb ka faida hi hogya. Isme kiya harj hai."
He smiled evilly.

"Main desperate nahi thi! Haan main uss ghar se nijat chahti thi. Tum aik achay shareef larke lagay the mujhe. Tum baat sunte the to mujhe laga kay tumhare zariye me iss toxic life se nikal sakti hoo per shayad main ghalat thi. Tum jhootay the! Tum sab dikhawa kar rahe the."
She sobbed slapping him right across his face.

"Hath mat lagana mujhe.!" He yelled holding her hands tight.

"Hath choro uska saqib!" Pulling her hands away from his azlan yelled with blood red eyes.

"Tum, Tumne mujhe ghalat istemal kia. You bloody cashed me. Aik baar apni maa behen ka hi sochlete" she stuttered with streams of tears rushing down her eyes.

"Meher, listen!" Azlan took a step towards her.

"Stop right there azlan!"
She yelled and he stopped.
He knew she was upset, torn and that was because of him! He had wanted to tell her all this but was not getting the perfect chance and partially he had also avoided because of the fear of this same scenario. He didnt wanted to hurt her.

"I, I m done! I m tired of both of you men playing with my life.
Saqib jao yahan se chale jao humesha kay liye, nahi chahiye mujhe tumhara sath! Bohat hogaya, ainda nazar mat ana mujhe!"
She whispered before walking away. Azlan had rushed behind her.

"Meher ruko please, meri baat sunlo!" He pleaded holding her hand.

"Azlan shah tum. Tum mujhe chordo, azzad kardo. Tum jeo apni zindagi apni marzi se or mujhe apni zindagi se janay do kahin door. Me thak gaii ho. Saza kaatli mene apne gunaho ki bus! ab aur jhoot ki zindagi nahi guzar sakti main!"
Pulling away her hand she yelled.

"Meher hum ghar jaaker baat kartay hain, please filhal chalo mere sath.!"
He stopped her midway.

"Konsa ghar azlan! Mera koi ghar nahi! Tumhe tumhara ghar mubarak ho! Mujhe tumhari koi baat nahi sunii. Please chale jao or chor do mujhe! Werna mene shor macha dena hai yaheen."
Harshly rubbing her eyes she walked away.
He had kept calling her but she was quick to stop a taxi.

"Fuck!" He yelled kicking his car in frustration and rushed running towards her.

Holding onto her hand from behind he shut the taxi's door stating clearly to the driver to leave as she was his wife.

"Ye kiya tareeqa hai azlan shah!" She sighed. She couldent fight anymore. She was torn and broken and tired.

"Yahan tamasha na lagao please, aik bar sirf aik bar meri bat sunlo." He pleaded.

"Tamasha mera bana kar mujhse bol rahay ho tamasha na lagaao! Chalo, bolo jo bolna hai!"
Scoffing she said. Hurt visible in her voice.

"Please ghar chalo pehle." Pulling her with him he said and tucked her in the front seat of the car. She was silent. She had given in for now.

Locking the doors with children locks he hastely drove towards their house. Meher was silently weeping and her silent tears were falling on azlan shah gardezi's heart.

_____

Entering the gardezi mansion she had rushed inside their room. She needed to pack and leave. After so much of humiliation she couldent stay here with him. Not at any cost.

"Meher I am sorry but you have to trust me, mujhe uske irado ka nahi pata tha or...."
Rushing in right after her he said holding onto his arm, turning her towards him.

"Why dident you tell me?" Cutting him through She questioned.

"Pehle mujhe laga that you knew it. Then when I realised that you dont know anything about it than I did not wanted to hurt you." He said honestly.

"Or jo ab me tooti hoon wo azlan! Jo bezti hui hai meri wo!"
Tears were flowing down her eyes.

"Mene ussay poocha to usne kaha k meher ko nahi batana but its for our future."
He murmurred. He was feeling helpless.

"Our future! My foot! He legit sold me here." She snapped.

"Meher, words!"

" Words! You men treated me like a whore and you want me to use words mr azlan shah gardezi. Aik ne mujhe becha or doosre ne khareeda. Words! " she scoffed

"Meher you are over reacting. Tum hurt na ho aur isi reaction kay liye nahi bataya tha tumhe!" He snapped. Her words were piercing his soul.

"Or na batate agar main ye sab sun na letee. Uss fraud ko jantay boojhtay tum mujhe uske sath janay dete? " she chuckled sarcasticly.

"Nahi... Never!" Holding onto her arms he pulled her closer.

"Jhoot!" She whispered. Her voice going numb at his intense glare and closeness.

"You have to trust me meher!" He whispered before taking her soft lips into his. Her salty tears were all he could taste but he needed it. He needed her touch. He needed to feel her, to make sure she was his and was staying....
She shut her eyes tight. Holding onto his shoulders she pushed back.

"I am not available for this azlan! Ainda mat kareeb ana mere or agar thori si bhi izzat karte ho meri to please akela chor do mujhe."
She stated very calmly leaving him bewildered.

"I am sorry!" Swallowing hard he took steps back. Lightening up a cigarette he was out of the room rushing downstairs he was out of the house rashly driving his car out.

________

Rubbing her tears away her hand halted on her lips and she sighed as a sob escaped. Why was she so drawn to azlan shah gardezi! Why did his advances always effect her. Why did she always shudder under his slightest touch, why had she always wanted more!

Why had her heart started loving everything he did. Why would all their beautiful memories bring smile on her face. Why was she starting to fall in crazy mad love for the first time in life. Why?

So many why's were lingering over her head and all would come to a halt remembering the insult, the embarassment she faced.
They had made her a toy, they had done buisness with her without her knowing.

Saqib was someone she had trusted for the first time ever. He was a good talker and listener and a good person hence she had taken the step but she was just too naive and he had used her for his own good.
And then another male had come into her life. Azlan shah gardezi! Who showed her some beautiful colours of life. Some intimate, some pure moments. Some lovely conversations and lots of respect but guess it was all a facade!
Why had destiny played this game with her when she was giving away her heart. Why?

Taking deep breaths she stood up and taking her bag out she stuffed in only the dresses that initially belonged to her. Packing in some of her necessities she searched up women hostels in the city and getting a vacancy in one she had called them.
Taking a shower she went into ama jans room.

"Kaisi ho meher?" Ama jan smiled.

"Theek, ap kaisi hain?" She asked.

"Main to theek, per tum theek nahi lag rahee? Sab khairiat to hai na? "
Ama jan asked.

"Jee, bus kuch dino kay liye apni ami ki taraf jana chahti hoo. " she barely voiced out.

"Hardam jao meher per mujhe batao koi baat hai jo pareshan kar rahi hai?" Sitting up, slightly worried ama jan asked.

"Nahi." She said as a sob left her mouth.

"Kiya hua meher? Azlan ne kuch bola phir se." Ama jan sounded worried now and sniffing she shook her head as a no.

"Main apko miss karungi." Meher said hugging the old lady.

"To na jao na." Ama jan said patting her head.

"Jana zaroori hai." She replied.

"Jald ajaogi na meher! Mera dil tumhare bagahir kaise lagayga?"
Ama jan said.

"Love you ama jan." Hugging her tight meher said.

"Ro kiun rahi ho bachay?" Ama jan asked again wiping her tears

"Bus aise hi ansoo agaye. Ap fikar na karen. Khuda hafiz."
Pulling back she stood up and left without looking back.

"Bibi sayeen main chor ata hoon." The driver said seeing her with a bag going towards the gate.

"Main chali jaungi." Smiling she replied.

"Chotay sayeen dantenge mujhe." He said again and tears started brimming in her eyes again.

"Kuch nahi kahenge, ap please jao." Waving him off she headed outside quickly where the uber she had called was waiting.

____________

Returning home at about 12 at night azlan headed towards their room. His steps halted on the door. He was hesitating to go inside. He just couldent face meher.

But he had to confess, to apologise! It was now or never. All evening he had been contemplating on this.
Taking a deep breath he stepped inside but only darkness and silence welcomed him
Turning on the lights he looked around but the room was empty. Slightly worried he rushed towards the toilet to find it empty also. Rushing back he got inside the closet and panick overtook him seeing things scattered around.

Turning around he ran out of his room, he was hysterically scanning each and every room of the gardezi mansion. His breathing was getting uneven. She was nowhere in sight.

"Bano!" He yelled walking towards the servant quarters.

"Meher kahan hai?" He asked.

"Sham main to bari bibi sayeen kay kamre me jatay dekha mene." She answered afraid of angry azlan.

Sighing he rushed to ama jans room.

"Kiya hua azlan? Sab khair hai?" Mr shah got worried seeing his sons hysterical condition.

"Ama jan meher kahan hai?" Waking up the old lady he asked. He was on the verge of crying.

"Kiya hua azlan? Shaam main apni ami kay ghar gayi thee wo. Sab khair hai na?"
She asked worried.

"Khair nahi hai ama jan, wo mujhse khafa hoker chali gai hai kahin!"
Sitting beside her he said. Tears were out of his eyes now. He couldent imagine living without her.

"Khafa kiun kiya tha usko jab ye haal karna tha khudka to? Aur Fikar na karo, apni ami kay pas gai hai ajayegi.Wese azlan wo bohat rorahi thi jatay hue."
Ama jan sat up and hugged her son.

"Main call karta hoon uski ami kay ghar. Shabash sambhalo khudko."
Mr shah said.

"Nahi ap wahan call nahi karenge. Main khud jaaker pata karta hoon."
Rubbing his face harshly he stood up and left.

"Ye larka pata nahi kab sudhrega, kab akal ayegi isko. Pata nahi kiya bola isne meher ko!" Mr shah sounded worried.

_____

"Meher bibi ko kon chorne gaya tha?" Rushing into the drivers quarters he asked.

"Sayeen, mene unhe bola tha per wo bazid theen kay khud jayengi."
Mushtak voiced out.

"Damn it!" He yelled punching the wall beside him.

"Sayeen mene bohat kaha bibi sayeen ko." Bending his head down mushtak said again.

"Gayeen kaise wo, kuch dekha tumne?" Calming himself down he asked.

"Uber mangwai shayad." Mushtak murmurred.

"Gari ka number kuch yaad hai?" He asked sighing while he was continously dialing mehers number which was coming off.

"Nahi sayeen" mushtak shook his head and taking a deep breath azlan was out. Starting the engine of his car he drove away. He was clueless as to where to find her. She had no friends and he was damn sure she would never go to her mothers place than where was she?

Increasing his cars speed he was now hitting the roads. He had gone to the university's campus. Showing mehers picture to the guards he asked if she had come here in the evening but they had shook their heads in a no.
He had gone to every possible place he thought she could be at but all in vain.
Resting his head on the steering wheel he sighed. Mehers mothers place was the last option. He was hesitating to go and ask there. He was afraid if she wouldent be there then they might assume other things.

Having no other option he had drove to their house. After two to three bells their peon had shown up.

"Meher ko bula denge ap?" Calculating his words he asked.

"Kon hai? "He heard anabiyas words.

"Azlan shah sahab!" The peon replied and in seconds anabiya was at the gate forcing him to come in.

"Sab sorahe the, main hi jaag rahi thi. Ap batain khairiat? Kaise ana hua?"
She asked smiling.

"Meher ayi hai kiya yahan?" He asked.

"Nahi to! Ghar per nahi hai kiya?" Anabiya was all ears now. All she wanted was just one scandal of meher and she was getting that.

"Nahi, wo..." gulping he started but was cut through.

"Bhag waag to nahi gai.?" She said. She seemed amused and azlan was getting confused.

"Kiya bol rahee hain ap?" He asked rudely.

"Haan, aik larka tha saqib jissay wo shadi karna chahti thee or hui nahi wahan. Uske sath bhaag to nahi gai." Holding onto azlans arm anabiya said.

"Apni ye choti soch or akal ko band rakho, dobara apne munh se meri biwi kay liye fazool alfaz na nikalna. Ghalti hui yahan aya me!"
Shrugging his arm off her he stated in anger.

"Main to apko bata rahi thi. Apko pata bhi hai iss saqib ka ya apko anjaan rakha hua hai? "
She said again not giving up.

"Mujhe sab pata hai anabiya! Fikr na karo tum. And thanks for your help."
Saying sternly he turned to leave.

"Wese sabko batadoo kay meher ghaib hai!" She asked wickedly.

"Haan aur sath main ye zaroor batana kay raat kay andhere main apne behnoi ko harass kar rahi thee main!"
Without turning around he said loud and clear before leaving.
____

"Kahan ho meher!" Punching his cars bonnet he yelled.

"Kahan dhoondoo meher ko?" Sitting inside his car he turned the car towards romans house.

"Sab khair, iss time tum yahan kiya kar rahe ho?" Rubbing his eyes roman came out on his constant calls.

"Yar apne office chal abhi, kisi ko trace karna hai." He said impatiently. Why hadent he gotten this idea before.

"Kisko?" Roman asked worried. It was nearly 3 at night.

"Koi hai, tum chalo, mujhe phone track karke do. Please" . He pleaded.

"Ye kin kamo main ho aj kal ezi tum. Kabhi kisi bande ka biodata pata karana hota hai kabhi kisi ko trace. Sab khair hai na?"
Roman sounded worried.

"Haan khair hai, ab chalo." Swallowing hard ezi said. It was hard for him to push back his tears. Seeing his condition without protesting anymore roman came to his office with ezi. Opening locks now he was working on his computer.

"Kon hai jisko trace karna hai tumne?" Roman asked ezi who was impatiently pacing around.

"My mrs." He blurted out.

"What? Kameene shadi kab ki or mrs kahan gayeen?" Roman nearly jumped.

"Yar bohat lambi story hai, filhal kaam kar tu please." Ignoring him he said.

"Teri halat per tars khaa kar kaam kar raha hoo, agar story solid na hui to maaf mahi karunga." Roman said and he could only nodd.

"Masla ye hai mere bhai kay phone off hai or kaam thora mushkil hojayega." Roman voiced out.

"Aj tera imtehaan hai, apni job ko kaam me laa salay." Getting alittle hope azlan smiled.

"Acha hai bhai acha hai! " working on the keyboard roman chuckled.

They had been busy till the morning. At about 5.30 roman sat back and smiled and azlan knew he had done the job.

"Address?" Azlan cocked up his brow.

"Working women hostel, shams road." Roman cocked up his brow also and smiled.

"Love you man!" Rushing out azlan saluted him.

"Bhabi wahan gayeen kiun? " Roman voiced out.

"Kaha na lambi kahani hai, phir kabhi sahi!" Without looking back he replied before driving rashly to his destination.

_____

Reaching there early morning he saw the gates locked. It was still dark. In the nearby masjid adhan for fajar salah could be heard.
Taking a deep breath he walked towards the masjid. Kneeling down in sujood he asked the almighty for meher! He cried, he wept, he pleaded. He had asked for a straight path. He had asked for her wellbeing.
It was then in the peace of the masjid he realised how deeply he loved her. How intensely she was rooted in his heart.

The sun was begining to rise. The chirping of the birds could be heard loud and clear. The fresh breeze of the morning gave in new hopes to him. His tired body and soul felt at peace after repenting to the almighty.

______

At around 7 he went in the reception that was outside and asked for meher. He was not allowed inside as it was a women hostel.

"Meherwish, apse koi milne aya hai, ap jaaker meeting room main mil lain."
Warden had come knocking at her door and sighing meherwish woke up. The previous night all she had done was to weep only. Her eyelids were red and swollen by now.

She knew quite well as to who it would be. She knew he could find her in minutes but still she had hoped that he would never find her.

Wrapping her dupata around she decended downstairs into the meeting room and yes she was right. He was standing there looking all worn out.

"Tum kiun aye ho yahan?" She voiced out.

"Yahi sawal mujhe tumse karna chahiye tha meher. Aik mauqa to dia hota mujhe. Itni badgumani?"
Coming closer he whispered. His eyes red.

"Badgumani kahan azlan shah? Dhokaybazi, jo tumne mere sath ki. Sau ikhtalafat humare per tumhe aisa nahi samjha tha mene."
She whispered as a tear escaped her eye.

"Main maafi mangta hoo meher per kasam se tumhare liye mere iraday kabhi ghalat nahi the. Main to tumhe janta bhi nahi tha tab. Or maine sirf isliye baat chupai kay tum hurt na ho."
Holding onto her shoulders he stated.

"Main na hoti koi aur hoti tab bhi jaiz nahi tha. Aurat itni raigaan nahi kay uski saudaybazi ki jaye. Mene sirf or sirf majboori main ye faisla kia tha."
Giving up she placed her head on his chest as her tears soaked his already wrinkled shirt.

"Ghar chalo meher please!" Kissing her head he whispered and she pulled back the next instant.

"Main nahi asakti, tum jao please. Ainda yahan mat ana."
She stated sternly.

"Meher khudara bus kardo! Nahi reh sakta main tumhare baghair. I have fallen in love with you! Please mujhe aziat mat do!"
He begged holding onto her wrist and she stilled at his confession.
She looked into his deep eyes which showed the sincerety.

"How can I trust you so easily." Shaking her head she murmurred.

"Aik chance meher, please." He pleaded and she sighed.

"Abhi jao yahan se please." Rubbing her eyes she tried pushing him away. He was confusing her.

"Meher, Agar meri koi aik achii yaad ho ya meri koi aik achi baat ho to usi kay liye wapis  ajao. Please." He sobbed holding onto her.
She was stunned seeing him weep. His tears were sincere.

And she remembered many, many good memories of the last four months. She remembered how he had paid her fee without asking, how he picked her from her mothers place without a question, how he had shown her fathers house to her. How he had taken care of everything. And then the beautiful memories of murree poured in and she sighed.

"Mujhe wakt do azlan, mujhe sochna hai." Taking a deep breath she said.

"Jitna chaho wakt lelo per loat kar mere pas ana meher!" He said.

"Tum abhi jao please. Please." She said pleadingly and sighing he gave up. Atleast he had gotten a hope and he knew she was fine.

"Main jald wapis aunga meher!" He voiced before leaving and sighing she wiped away her tears.
This life had brought her into a very difficult phase.

__________

Hey guys...

A very long chapter... the longest I have ever written...

Its beautiful isent it?

Sad but deep.

Isme mene bht gehri urdu bhi jhaari hai🤣🙈🙊

Is meher justified ya bht ziada hogaya???

Masoom meher, I feel sad for her. But atleast saqib ka sach samnay agaya...

Or azlan shah gardezi ka naya roop dekhne ko mila.
Kaisa laga..

So our boy finally confessed.

Hope meher is back with him soon.

.....

Well eventually this story is coming to an end.

Wah what a beautiful journey!

Pls vote, cmnt and share..
Yes pls share.
Apni apni walls per post karen pls and cmnts me mujhe tag karen
( itna to kar sakte haina na plss sab))))