That was his limit as he immediately got up and growled lowly.

The night was silent and everyone was sleeping. No, they weren't sleeping. They were listening to our quarrel. But still, the very growl was still loud for me after how Anton startled me to death.

"I am here. You are here. You will always be here with me," he said, his voice sounding deep and firm.

I bit my tongue while blinking the wet lashes.

He gulped before explaining, "I haven't done any mistake knowingly. I was drunk and out of my senses. I do not remember what happened that night. I only know that months passed and one day, sister Lucine stands at my door. She gives me this sweet pup and tells me that it is mine. The woman I was with had given the pup to her."

I was blank.

He had been careless. He had been a womanizer.

"I haven't danced with women without them begging me for it. But with you, it is more than a dance. It has always been different. My mate makes me mad. Makes me the monster. My mate brings out the real Lycan in me. It is hard to hold back and beg for her love. She makes me crave it like the crops beg for rain. She does that magic on me. Here, I am, standing, muffling out words in hope of saving the bond I have with you. I don't want it to get dirty, my mate." He said, releasing a long sigh.

Kneeling again, he grabbed my hand that was outside of the furs.

I stiffened and pulled it back immediately. But he didn't let it go.

My teeth gritted while he lowered his eyes and rested his right cheek against my left hand. Blinking in disturbance, he took a long breathe.

"I have believed my mother. Lucine is just like her. Thus, I believe her too. If she says, it is my pup. It is mine, my mate."

I sniffled while rubbed his bearded cheek against my hand after holding it with both his hands.

"I like to dance. But I wouldn't fuck a female if she is not mate. I don't know what came over me that night. The thought of it scares me," he whispered softly. "But not more than the thought of losing my mate. If the presence of my pup will hurt my mate, I will never bring you two together. But I cannot choose, my mate. I cannot."

I gulped slowly while looking at him.

He had closed his eyes.

"I would not dance ever. I would not leave your side. All I ask is for one hour to visit my pup. And I shall be the loyal mate to you. Tara had just died and I couldn't stop drinking. The pain was too much. She was like a pup. If only I knew that it would make me ashamed in front of my mate, I had never touched the wine that night."

I breathed shakily while he stayed silent.

"You were abandoned by your mother and his mate. This pup is not a punishment. For I will keep you two apart. I will not be partial."

His nostrils flared.

"But believe in me, my mate. For I have loved only woman and that is you." He whispered, bringing his lips closer to my knuckles. "Deep in my heart, mind and soul, I have saved myself for you. I do not remember anything."

"But it doesn't make you any innocent. Does it?" I asked calmly, disgust sprinkling along.

He opened his eyes and looked at me.

"You have ruined that child's life. You have ruined mine," I said, looking at him in hurt. "You do not remember anything? Why? Because you were drunk and careless. There is no problem even if you had it. But you had to tell me before forcing me into those rituals with you, Karam. You had to confess before bursting out on me for kissing two men."

He clenched his jaws.

"You had no right to be angry on me, dominate me, give those lectures on being pure and shit, when you yourself aren't virgin." I said, looking at him angrily. "A hypocrite. That's what you are. You say, you love me? Do you know that I want to leave this place in return for anything? Do you care to fulfill that wish of mine? If you cannot give me that as my mate, then you are not one. You are just a careless, drunkard womanizer."

He flared his nostrils and nodded slowly. "I was. I was, my little mate. But not anymore."

"I ignored the age gap. I accepted it. I accepted this room, these clothes, this piercing, this hairstyle, this lifestyle—all for you. And you couldn't even feel ashamed before keeping in the dark."

"My mate," he pleaded with those eyes while I shook my head.

"All those kisses and moments were my phase of weakness. I regret those moments," I said, curling my lip in hatred, making him tighten his hold on my hand.

"I can't believe you just took advantage of my young age like that. I feel naive and stupid." I murmured, gulping hard. "Karam, leave my hand."

"Not until you understand my misery, my mate. I have been helpless," he said, blinking those glossy eyes and finally, holding some confidence.

"Leave," I whispered while pulling my hand back.

He didn't fight and let go of it when I pulled it back harshly.

Covering myself with the furs, I spoke out the words. "I have been saved from falling into your trap. Something positive did come out of this. At the end of the day, I am a human girl from centuries ahead while you are just a barbaric and honorless cavemen."

Footsteps occurred after a moment and the door was shut gently.

I wondered why he wasn't furious enough to kill me right on the spot after listening such bitter words.

Because he knew, he had an illegitimate child.

I still felt unsatisfied.

I would soon feel it, though. I really would. When I would cross that border.

I needed to work upon it before anything worse could happen that could stop me from crossing that border.

I had to think.

A way to take advantage of his guilt.

.

.

.

_____

.

.

.

"She was a mystic."

I blinked while staring at the bed in blankness.

"That is all, Karam can remember from that night. She had long black hair and eyes too kohled for him to see her orbs," said Nysa while nodding her head sadly.

"So what if she was a mystic." Alvena huffed softly. "I have grown up in that pack. The widows only go for males who are interested in them. She would have approached him only if Karam was interested."

My mouth parted in slight shock.

"Don't blame Karam about it. He is the most bravest of them. He admits his mistakes," said Natasha while I kept sitting against the pillow, not being able to move in numbness of how I ended up in that wild romance with a man who had a child.

I was just eighteen. Gran would kill me.

"And he trusts Lucine," added Natasha. The sound of her cutting apples for me reached my ears. I had lost the appetite really. I couldn't even gulp down the water. I felt so sick in the mind.

"It's a mistake, Misty. He didn't do it unintentionally. Believe me, he had been wanting to talk about it to you from the first day. So, none of the brothers could later tease you about it." Natasha said while Alvena passed me the plate.

I ignored it.

"Anton was all beaten when he returned from the patrol in the morning," said Nysa while I caught her hand passing the plate further to me. "Karam did release all of the anger on him. Anton, being the big brother didn't bother to fight back."

"He is resting now until he heals," said Alvena quietly. "But Karam is still here. He hasn't gone to the work, today. He is been wanting to get your response, Misty."

"There will be no response," came the Steen voice from Amelia sitting away on the chair near the bed. I lowered my eyes while she said, "He has made our sister cry. I knew it would happen. I knew this. I wanted to kill that child the day Lucine brought that pup here. But Karam denied me any advances. Before I could furious, I remembered my Kenny and Emily. I am in his debt."

"But we can kill the bastard if you want us to," said Nysa, making me look up at her. She smiled politely. "The end of these males' arrogance and womanizing is killing their options. The guilt that those deaths happened because of their acts, torture them. Robin doesn't dare look at any widow for he remembers the female who had offered her services on every full moon."

Natasha gulped while Alvena shifted uncomfortably.

Amelia smirked in agreement. "For our Foxy's pain, we will vanish the pup. The female he fucked is not in the lives. Even if one day, she comes, she won't go her home without her head hanging on her shoulder by a single thread."

I blinked in slight nausea while Alvena cupped my hand. "Think what you want to do, Misty."

"Karam loves you," said Natasha. "If you'll ask him anything, he will agree to it. Even if it means not seeing that child ever. But he won't be able to see you this way."

"Had it been Anton, I would have been six feet under the ground with my knees and arms ripped apart. Karam is not scared of feeling the guilt," said Alvena while looking at me. "Yet he tried to convince you. Didn't he?"

Amelia and Nysa turned quiet when I asked, "Why does men dance with those women?"

"Widows can be breeders for slowly, all the females can't birth pups after sometime." Nysa said sadly. "But this doesn't mean, they should be allowed to dance with us in the bonfires. They should simply be treated as whores."

Alvena smiled in discomfort. "It's actually the deal. My pack provides us cloth and in return, their widows are allowed to come here once in a month to satisfy the hunger of Lycan males and females."

I gasped.

"I had asked King to remove this deal," said Amelia while shaking her head. "But we need the soft silk and cotton. All they ask is for their widows to be used. It is a tempting solution, indeed. For the mystic women who were supposed to be mating their mates but cannot now they are gone. And makes just want the tits and hypnotizing eyes."

My hands shook while Natasha sighed heavily. "Thus, brother King wouldn't let go of the deal. He says, it is an old custom and must be followed to celebrate our ancestors."

"Tonight is a bonfire too," said Amelia while looking at me. "You can ask Karam to not even attend it. He is a happy pup. He loves dancing. We all knows he does it well. It is his brothers who always make him drink and do wrong deeds."

"When he is drunk, he stops focusing on the female in his hands. He is more into the dance and swaying to the tunes." Alvena said while shaking her head. "He hasn't asked for you a dance because he knows, you still can deny it and it will be insulting. Man ego comes in his way."

"All males are like that," said Nysa, huffing slightly. "The brothers teach each other bad things. Oskar is a chicken since his childhood. But look at him now, Anton made him skin the bear that day. I asked for them to send it to the butchers. But Anton likes to spread barbarism."

"As if my brother would be hurt, instead they will be happy." Natasha said, while shaking her head. "Kaamil never liked skinning the animals. But the snow gets thick and we have to keep us warm. Look good too. Aslan doesn't mind keeping his work clean. Father has always been hesitant though. He said that they used to kill only on the hunt and wouldn't bring dead animals home unless they needed it."

"Aslan? Kaamil?" I blinked in shock. "You are Uncle Joran's daughter?"

The females turned silent while Natasha smiled at me. "Karam had told me the day before he was taking you to them."

"We are cousins?" I whispered while she nodded with a sad smile. "Even then you let him hide the truth from me?" I asked while narrowing my eyes.

Her smile faded. "He had been dying to tell you. But sister here, wanted you to loosen up, first."

Amelia cleared her throat. "Enough! We females must have each other's back. Do not argue with each other. Foxy, think what it is you want with Karam. The dead pup or let it be. Because our boy loves his bride more than anything we know. He will let the bastard go in your love."

My lips parted while Nysa nodded.

Alvena shook her head at me. Natasha only turned more uncomfortable.

"We must leave. So, he can enter. We will make sure he follows your wishes," said Amelia while passing me a smile. "I know, our Foxy has started to give her heart to our Karam too."

In your dreams, bitch.

But at least, she understood that womanizing was bad.

They got up and left the room.

While I stared at the apple pieces on the plate blankly.

My mind was too numb to let me think of a way.

____

"What do you think?"

Please vote and comment.

_

Gilbert's POV won't come until I feel the right time for it.