Bella's POV

Imagine riding on the scariest roller coaster ever built while simultaneously living through your worst fear.

That's how I feel right now.

I don't think I've stopped moving at all since James and Finn left a few hours ago, or, what felt like a few hours. Whether I was pacing, tapping my fingers, or bouncing my leg.

The baby seemed to sense my anxiety because they haven't stopped moving either.

"Bella, would you stop tapping your foot? It's getting on my nerves." I almost jumped at the sound of Megan's voice so close to me.

I hadn't realized she walked from the kitchen to sit next to me on the couch.

"Sorry." I bite my lip, trying to get my muscles to keep my foot from moving.

"I made you more tea because you left your other cup to go cold over there." She told me, motioning to the kitchen table with a half-smile as she held a blue coffee mug toward me.

"Sorry again," I grab the handle of the mug and lift it from her hand slowly. "I've never been good at remaining calm, especially when it comes to Zara."

"I know, mama bear." She whispered, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and I lay my head on hers.

After Zara was born, Megan just started to call me 'mama bear' just to annoy me. But now, it gave me a sense of comforting nostalgia.

The only sound in the room that followed her words was the soft breathing of Delilah from the love seat across from us.

"Do you think he'll do it?" I blurt out into the peaceful silence.

"Who do what?"

"Do you think Kyle would actually kill her?"

More silence.

"Why are you asking questions like that? You're supposed to not be stressing out." Megan finally spoke, obviously avoiding the question.

"My daughter has just been kidnapped by my crazy high school boyfriend who is still obsessed with me. Me stressing out is the least of my problems right now, Megan."

"Your baby is counting on you to not stress out," I sigh.

I knew she was right but I can't help myself. I need to worry about my daughter, her life is on the line because of me.

I lifted the mug to my lips and slowly tipped it towards me until I felt the hot liquid against my teeth.

When the front door swung open I nearly fell out of my seat in an attempt to get up.

"What happened? Did you find anything?" I ramble after placing the mug on the coffee table before walking around the couch.

James walks in first, Finn following close behind. They both wore a face of a mixture of what looks like fear and seriousness.

"We think she's at an abandoned farmhouse out in the country." James told me and I let out an involuntary sigh.

At least we knew where she was.

"So what do we do now?" Megan, who was standing next to me, spoke my mind.

"We're going to find her." Finn answered, shoving his hands in his front pockets.

"You can't go there." I counter, looking between the two who have clearly lost their minds.

"We can't wait for the police. Even if we told them what we know, they have to do their own investigation before going there. By then," Finn stopped and I noticed his Adam's apple bob. "It'll be too late."

"Then I'm going with you guys."

"No, you're not." James told me, his beautiful brown eyes wide. "You're staying right here where it's safe."

"The hell I will! She's my daughter too, she needs me as much as she needs you to save her."

"What she needs more is for you and the baby to stay safe and alive." He reasons, but I shake my head.

"I'm going whether you like it or not." I tell him, crossing my arms over my chest.

James sighs and I notice him reach into the waistband of his pants. He opens his hand in front of me, his palm up, but not empty. There, sat a matte black hand pistol.

My face fell.

"Where did you get that?" I question, my hands dropping to my sides.

"It's Finn's. We're going to need protection because Kyle is going to have a gun of his own." He told me, putting the gun back in his waistband. "Do you see now why you can't come with us?"

I nod but don't say anything, wrapping my arms around myself.

I don't know why, but seeing that gun made me realize just how serious this was. My husband was holding a weapon. Something that could take someone's life away.

"We need to go, here's the address to the farmhouse." James said, taking a piece of paper from his back pocket and he hands it to Megan.

"Why do we need this?"

"Give it to the police when they arrive." He answers, but his words sound so far away.

Why did this happen? Zara is a good person, she does not deserve to die because of my stupid decision to go out with a psycho in high school.

The smell of James's cologne filled my nose as he wrapped his arms around my body, my bump separating us just slightly.

"I'll be fine. I'm going to bring Zara home safe and sound." He whispered into my ear for only me to hear.

Tears pricked at my eyes.

I want to believe him, I just don't know how.

"We'll be back before you know it, mon amour, I promise."

I nod my head against his chest, taking another breath of his cologne.

I felt his fingers find their way under my chin and he lifts my head up to look at him.

His adorable chocolate eyes looked down at me in assurance. His eyes pleaded with me believe him, to hold onto hope that our little girl is alive without a scratch.

I stood on my tippy-toes so we were almost equal height and pressed my lips against his. My entire body tingled as he kissed me back. Every time we kissed, it was like I was falling in love all over again.

"I love you." He whispered, our foreheads resting against each other's.

"I love you more."

Slowly, he pulls himself from me and I immediately miss the warmth of his arms around me.

Finn had vanished from his spot and was now standing by the stairs talking to Lucy, who looked very unhappy with the conversation between them.

They exchange words I can't hear, her lips turned into a frown before Finn wraps his arms around her much smaller frame. She took in a breath as Finn whispered something in her ear and she nodded her head in response.

"Ready?" James asks as Finn retracts his arms from his sister.

He huffed, shoving his hands in the front pockets of his jeans. "As ready as I'll ever be."

~~~

A.N~

I'm sorry for the half-assed writing and short chapters, I'm really trying my hardest right now. I have some writer's block for this story.

Chapter 45 is written and published. Hope you all enjoyed! <3

Question:

What's your favorite book? (Wattpad or published)