I'm baaaaaack. I had a crazy end of semester with homework, exams and such but I only have one left so hey, long time no cry together!!

Let's kick this chapter off with making fun of my faves! I present to you:
How to Introduce the ouat Characters to Someone, Out of Context

Emma:
-She's the saviour, whatever that means.
-Likes grilled cheese
-Owns like four of the same leather jacket
-Likes hot men in leather jackets that are way older than her (Neal, August, Killian)
-Like, obsessed with Captain Hook
-Stabs her own boyfriend
-Then chases him to hell because she killed him

Killian:
-Marry me
-No, marry Emma
-300 years old
-Emma Swan af
-Makes heart eyes at himself but more at Emma
-Looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll
-Drinks rum for breakfast
-LOOK AT ME I'M A TARGET
-Won't stop dying. Got stabbed four times.
-Dead... But not...?

Snow:
-Mama bear mode has no chill
-David af
-Looks like a cinnamon roll, but could actually kill you
-SHE WAS TEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNN
-Pretty much best friends with her stepmother who tried to kill her for years
-Doesn't like getting called on her shit
-Names her child after her other child's dead ex
-Rainbow stickers and unicorn kisses

David:
-His best friend is his daughter's boyfriend who he killed but then didn't
-Doesn't do much, but does at the same time
-Show White af
-Attractiveness is not given enough attention
-Low-key wants to kill half of Storybrooke
-Shepherd
-But also Prince/King idek anymore

Regina:
-Can we drop the E-Word
-But then uses the E-Word
-You wanna talk about Captain Guyliner?
-Robin Hood af
-Don't touch her son or beware the fireball
-If she gets mad at you, she'll curse the whole world it doesn't matter if you're ten
-Her name is Joe ok

Robin Hood:
-Doesn't do or say a whole lot
-New daddy
-Zelena kind of raped him?
-Evil Queen af
-He'll shoot you with an arrow or some shit
-Sassy princess
-Newest member of the Henry's hot step-dads/grandpas club
-He died for like five minutes

Henry:
-Died once or twice
-He's the author so he's special or something
-He's still ten fight me
-Has a girlfriend who's dating a horse who's dating pumpkins
-Has seen at least five people he loves die but they've all come back to life (or will soon)
-Has, like, the best/weirdest family ever
-Has an evil grandfather who had an evil father who have both tried to kill him
-Will fight you with his pen of death
-Can't lift a sword
-Eats poisonous stuff

Rumple:
-Raisin
-Literally the biggest asshole to ever live but everyone kind of loves him
-Related to everyone
-Has screwed everyone over
-Beef with Captain Hook
-Doesn't like anyone but Belle and kind of Henry
-Keeps hands in jars for 300+ years
-Addicted to killing
-Cries when people call him on his shit

Belle:
-Cinnamon roll, too good, too pure for this world
-Honestly needs to stop trusting her husband/ex husband
-Keeps getting kidnapped
-Maddest style in Storybrooke
-Sad most of the time
-Needs a hug, and also Will

Zelena:
-Crazy green bitch
-Won't go away
-Holds a grudge like no one's business
-Faked her death cause she was mad at her sister because of their mom
-Probably fucked Rumple
-Oops, I killed people lol
-Wants to name her daughter pistachio
-Hardcore ships Captain Swan
-Has literally no chill
-Or friends

Oops.