Sorry I'm late. In a bitchy mood cos I'm pulling an all-nighter to do assignments. Wish I could sleep :( :( 

Anyway, Here's the update. Almost decided that I wouldn't post today just to spread my bad mood but turns out I'm an angel :P 

CHAPTER 21

Abir hadn't asked to be placed in this position. He had never looked up to the heavens and wished himself the company or the wealth. He had never even truly wished for Mishti, just accepted that she could never be his.

But Nannu had died. He had died.

And it was nobody's fault.

Nannu had died, and Abir's life had been changed in every way imaginable except one.

He still loved Mishti.

God, how he loved her.

There was no reason they couldn't marry. No laws, no customs, no objections from his family, nothing but his own conscience, which had, quite suddenly, grown silent on the matter.

And Abir finally allowed himself to ponder, for the very first time, the one question he had never asked himself.

What would Nannu think of all this?

Abir went out of his room and entered the study. The rest of the house had Mishti written all over it, but the study.. The study was Nannu's domain and as he sat there, Abir realised just how much he needed his brother.

Abir (whisper) : Nannu!

Unbidden, memories of his childhood rose in Abir's mind. Nannu and Abir playing cricket with Nannu's father in the play ground. The two of them eating hot pakoras in the rain, Nannu taking care of him when Abir had fractured his hand in a horrible cycle manoeuvre, Nannu bursting with happiness as he told Abir all about Mishti.

All these flashes made Abir realise something.

He realized that his cousin would have given his blessing. Nannu's heart was that big, his love for Mishti—and Abir—that true. He would have wanted Mishti to be loved and cherished the way that Abir loved and cherished her.

And he would have wanted Abir to be happy.

The one emotion Abir had never truly thought he could apply to himself.

Happy.

Abir knew that Nannu would never begrudge him for marrying Mishti. Abir's lips lifted upwards in a slight smile. Finally, hig guilt disappeared. The fear of overshadowing Nannu disappeared. Nannu would always be in his heart and Mishti's as well. Abir knew that a part of her heart was for Nannu alone and he respected that. He respected their love and was even glad that his cousin had been married to Mishti.

Nannu had died a happy content man.

Abir : Bye Nannu! Thank you, My brother.

Abir walked out of the study, finally guilt-free and eager for his new life.

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Mishti jumped as she heard the knock on her door.

Abir.

It had to be. She couldn't tell she was surprised. She had been waiting for it, after all. But that didn't reduce her nerves, anyways.

She opened the door and found that instead of a handsome visage, She found a housemaid carrying a plate of food.

Eyes narrowing suspiciously, Mishti poked her head into the hall, looking this way and that, fully expect­ing Abir to be lurking in some darkened corner, just waiting for the right moment to pounce.

But he was nowhere.

The housemaid timidly handed over the tray to Mishti.

Housemaid : Sir asked me to give this to you. He thought you might be hungry.

Mishti scanned the contents for a note, a flower, something to indicate Abir's intentions, but there was nothing.

And there was nothing for the rest of the night, and nothing the next morning, either. Other than another housemaid bringing her a tray containing coffee and breakfast.

Mishti was addled. She had asked for time and that's what Abir seemed to be giving her.

And it was horrible.

She didn't want to be alone with her thoughts. But neither did she want to be with him.

Clearly, she could not be trusted in his presence. And she didn't particularly trust him, either, with his sultry looks and whispered questions.

Will you kiss me, Mishti? Will you let me kiss you?

And she couldn't refuse, not when he was standing so close, his eyes—his amazing heavy-lidded eyes— watching her with such smoldering intensity.

He mesmerized her. That could be the only explanation.

Mishti ate her breakfast as fast as she could. She was going to go out. She had always hated being closed and this was excrutiating.

She didn't want to meet Abir though. So, She decided to take a stroll outside.

She dressed quickly, then slipped out of her room, shaking her head at herself as she peered stealthily down the hall, acting like nothing so much as a burglar, eager to make a clean escape.

Mishti (thinking) : Acting like a burglar in my own house. How wonderful.

But she didn't see him as she made her way down the hall, and she didn't see him on the stairs, either. He wasn't in any of the rooms or salons, and, by the time she reached the front door, she couldn't help but frown.

Where was he?

She didn't wish to see him, of course, but it did seem rather anticlimactic after all of her worrying.She placed her hand on the knob. She should run. 

She should hurry out now, while the coast was clear and she could make her escape.But she paused. She couldn't shake off the feeling that he was watching her. 

Mishti (looking to her right) : Abir? 

She looked to her left and called out his name again. Nothing. She gave her head a shake. 

Good God, what had be­come of her? She was growing far too fanciful. Paranoid, even. With one last glance behind her, she left the house. 

Abir came out from his hidden place under the stairs and smiled softly.

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Mishti entered Rajvansh Cottage after almost eight hours. She had roamed about the village and mountains for a while, then had grown weary. But she hadn't wanted to go back home and so spent the rest of her time in her friend Aakashi's house. But soon, she knew she had to go home. 

She couldn't avoid her house forever.

So she slipped back in as quietly as she'd left, planning to make her way up to her room, where she could have supper alone. But before she could make it to the bottom of the stairs, she heard her name.

Abir : Mishti!

Mishti stood still. 

Ofcourse it was Abir. 

It was always Abir. She couldn't expect him to leave her alone forever.

But the strange thing was—she wasn't quite certain whether she was annoyed or relieved. S

he turned sideways and looked at him. 

Abir : I have asked Sallu to bring us supper in the library. Do you mind? 

Mishti looked at Abir suspiciously. If he was planning to seduce her again, Why would he choose the library? It seemed like the least romantic place one could think of.

Abir (looking at her amused) : Mishti!

Mishti : What are you doing in there? 

Abir (shrugging) : Work mostly. I like working here in the library. 

Mishti (eyebrows raised) : The library? 

Abir : It's remarkably peaceful, not to mention innocent.

Mishti felt the heat rush to her cheeks and walked past Abir into the library. 

Abir (pouring a cup of tea) : Would you like some tea? 

Mishti (looking gratefully at him) : I would. 

The grounds were lovely, but still quite cold.

Abir : Oh!

One of his brows quirked, but only slightly, and she wasn't sure whether he'd done it on purpose. He was al­ways in such control of his expressions; he'd have been a master gambler, had he had the inclination. But his left brow was different; Mishti had noticed years ago that it sometimes moved when he clearly thought he was keeping his face perfectly impassive. She'd always thought of it as her own little secret, her private window into the workings of his mind.

Except now she wasn't sure she wanted such a window. It implied a closeness with which she wasn't quite com­fortable any longer. Not to mention that she'd clearly been deluded when she'd thought she might ever understand the workings of his mind.

Mishti : So, What are you up to? 

Abir : Right now? Just having tea and waiting for supper. I think it's going to be rajma chaval tonight.

Mishti (rolling her eyes) : Abir!

Abir : I kept the tea ready because I thought you might be cold.

Mishti : You knew when I left? 

Abir (in a half-grin) : Ofcourse. 

And she wasn't surprised. That was the only thing that surprised her, actually—that she wasn't surprised.

Abir : I have something for you. 

Mishti jumped in her seat. She prayed that it wasn't a ring. 

She wasn't ready. Not yet. 

Mishti : I.. I told you I wanted time.... I...

Abir took a gift wrapped parcel and handed it to her along with a very pretty bouquet of white lilies and a note. Mishti looked at the long stalks of the flowers, each bloom more lovely than the last. 

Mishti : What is this? 

Abir (frowning at the things in his hand) : I call them gifts. What about you? These white things are called flowers, this piece of paper, a note and in this box contains a present for you. You can take them. They won't bite. 

Mishti took the parcels wonderingly. She smiled as she fingered the lilies lovingly drawing a soft smile from Abir. She opened the folded sheet and saw a handwritten note :
Would you like to go on a date with me? - Abir 
PS : I hope you like the dress I bought. And I hope you will wear it for the date if you say yes. 

Mishti looked at Abir who was looking at her with an unreadable expression. He pointed towards the present and Mishti slowly opened it. She gasped when she saw what was inside. 

Mishti : A saree? 

It was a very pretty saree, pale gold in colour and a sleeveless blouse. Mishti loved it. Her eyes shone with excitement and wonder as she looked at him. 

Mishti : What is this? 

Abir : This gesture? I'm courting you. 

Mishti blinked. 

Once. 

Mishti : I'm sorry? 

Abir (with an indulgent smile) : I'm courting you. I want to spend time with you, talk to you, learn more about you and convince you that I really want to be with you. 

Mishti looked at him, still shocked. 

Abir : Is it such a surprise? 

After all that had passed between them?

Yes. 

Mishti : But... I thought you wanted me, only for... you know? 

Abir got up from his seat and went and kneeled in front of her. 

Abir : That was my way of getting you to agree for marriage. I've rethought my strategies. But don't be mistaken. I do still want you. I'm only a man, after all. And you, as I believe we've more than made clear, are very much a woman.

Mishti was sure that her face must be crimson right now.

Abir (taking her hand in his) : There is more to a marriage than the nights together. I thought we should at least try spending some time during the day doing something fun. 

Mishti couldn't take her eyes off his hand clasped in hers. Sparks were flowing through her and she was befuddled. 

Abir : Don't you think this is a good idea? Don't you think? 

No, she didn't think. Not anymore, at least. 

It was a bit of a problem, that. 

But at his words, her eyes went to his face and straight away his lips. Those magnificent lips, smiling languidly at her.

She heard herself sigh. Those lips had done such mag­nificent things to her.

To all of her. Every last inch. Good God, she could practically feel them now. And it left her squirming in her seat.

Abir : Are you alright? 

Mishti (nodding quickly) : Yes!

Abir : Are you sure? 

Mishti : Why are you being so nice to me? 

Abir (his eyebrow raised) : Shouldn't I be? 

Mishti : No!

Abir (amused) : I shouldn't be nice to you. 

Mishti (shaking her head) : That's not what I meant. 

He'd befuddled her, and she hated it. There was nothing she valued more than a cool and clear head, and Abir had managed to steal that from her with a single kiss.

And then he'd done more.

So much more.

She was never going to be the same.

She was never going to be sane.

Abir : You really don't look alright. 

Mishti was going to murder him. 

Abir looked at her and smiled. 

God, She wanted to kiss him. 

Abir (softly) : Mishti? 

Every time he spoke, every time he moved his mouth, even just to breathe, her eyes settled on his lips. And she knew that he knew—with all of his experi­ence, all of his seductive prowess—exactly what she was feeling. 

He could reach for her now and she wouldn't refuse.

He could touch her and she'd go up in flames.

Mishti got up abruptly which made Abir get up from his awkward kneeling position too. 

Mishti (in a shaky voice) : I have to go. 

But her voice lacked conviction and her eyes couldn't seem to not look at his own. 

Abir : Ofcourse, You must be tired. Really tired, in fact. Am I right? 

She nodded, even though she knew he was mocking her.

Abir : Go on then. 

Mishti gripped the edge of her chair, steadied herself and prepared to look away when she was once again stopped by his voice. 

Abir : Wait! 

Mishti held on to the chair harder, and looked at him. 

Abir : You didn't answer. Would you like to come on a date with me? 

Mishti stood rooted. She wanted to say no. At least she thought she wanted to say no. But she was still. Abir took her hand in his again and kissed her knuckles softly. 

Abir : I would be really sad if you said no. Will you say yes, Mishti? Will you spend the whole of tomorrow with me? 

Mishti shivered. She stared down at him, unable to take her eyes off of his head as he bent down over her hand. His lips brushed her fingers. Once... twice... and then he was through.

Mishti : Yes.

Abir did not tell anything, But she could see he was pleased. He let go off her fingers and told her to go back to her room. But Her lips parted. She couldn't stop watching his face.

He'd mesmerized her, held her soul captive. And she couldn't move.

Abir moved, closer, devastating her as he ran a feather like touch with his fingers on her cheek. 

Abir : Do you want to stay, Mishti? 

She did.

Abir (pulling her close, whispering) : Will you stay? Or will you go? 

She stayed. God knew why, she stayed.

And Abir showed her just how romantic a library could be.

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